₦airaland Forum

Lilimax: I can't understand how these young girls do it.

How somebody can be between 6-7months pregnant without the stomach
protuding very well is beyond me.

I want to know the secret

When it happens, just tie giddo (not sure of the spelling)

spenca: These are turkeys

these are turkeies.

I saw this on facebook and decided to post it here

[quote author=olas24u][/quote]The ogun you asked to fire me has blinded your eyes before now.
If they have refused to build factories why not build or you dey forbid to build?

olas24u: So you don't read of pastors having sex with members of the church abi?

Its happening everyday and BTW, they arent pastors. God didnt call them, they called themselves or rather, their stomach called them

olas24u: It is all brain washing of the citizen ,how come almost every 500 meters you can find a church and yet the crime rate is so high,with looters seating in front of the church.For many years it has been the same.

its so because people go to church for so many reasons. Imagine, a young man returning from church and you asked him of the pastor's topic and text, he cant even remember.
Its not abt going to church, its doing the word. When we fail to practice what the word of God says, then crime will remain in the society.

olas24u: You can quote another verse from the bible.

I can't remember quoting any verse before, or did i?

divex: ON POINT. I've look at redeem church and i don't really see anything religious about that church. OLORUN. Just hypocrites and cultist n self righteous ppl who encourage others to come to their church but their lifestyle is rubbish

My flatmate, a redeem member and also a chorister there. Every night around 8:30 to 9:00pm, that is when her choir master will come and sit down in the parlour ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, till 10pm 11pm, sometimes they go enter room, sometimes i go dey here door banging up and down. They guy comes to my house and lies down like a king on my couch. Then when he sees me, he starts preaching. [size=24pt]HYPOCRITES[/size]

If you're having grudgies with your flatmate, go settle it with her. Why only seeing the bad ones, and not the good ones. Like attracts like.

Iceberyln: wat is dis 1 sayn

Na upside down u take read am?

olaolayink: dear op,
call your network provider customer care line xplain to them and ask them to send you the number.......i hope dis will help

MTN wont do nothing. Dont bother calling them, if the network is MTN

5100

1 shortblackboy: RIP in advance tell ur family to accept my condolences

Jesus! Expensive joke

caseless: just the same reason why i hate micheal jackson



if black people are not proud of their color, who will?

Dettol

End shall never cease to wonder.

ayusco85: It was one of ma prayer point in shiloh. Thank u jesus. Now i can graduate by february and make june batch.
**runs to dust his project and final year notes book, and take a peek at his matric number***

So u mean say u don forget ur matric number? Wahala dey bedat

Elnino4ladies: .shut up brat..

shut up brat..

Elnino4ladies: Wishn dem quickest divorce....

Enemy of progress. I promise you, they will disappoint you

All in the name of love. It is well

vanguard1: They should remember to tell us the divorce store..HML all the same

Enemy of progress

Phema: * Reception Hall = 40,000
* Cake (Four steps and 200 cut pieces) = 45,000
* Hall decor = 80,000
* Photography (and all other stuff involved) = 100,000

Not done, but budgeted:

* Wedding dress, inner lace, under skirt, veil = 55,000
* Groom's suit, shirt, tie and pocket square = 40,000
* 2 shoes for bride, 2 for groom ( for trad and white) = 40,000
* Wedding rings = 80,000
* Food for 250 guests = 250,000
* Traditional marriage and Thanksgiving wears for couple (both buying and making) = 50,000
* Trad wears for parents = 40,000
* Entertainment drinks for White ( 12 crates of Malt and few bottles of wine) = 50,000
* Traditional marriage list = 100,000
* Traditional marriage entertainment drinks ( 5 crates of Malt) = 10,500
* Canopy, chairs and decor for trad = 70,000
* Food for trad = 100,000
* 25 packs of bottled water for white at #500 each = 12,500
* DJ and MC for white = 50,000
* Chin chin, sweets and chewing gum for white = 10,000
* Wedding IVs, wedding Program and souvenirs = 90,000
* Bridal train material and sewing = 25,000
* Registery = 30,000
* Bridal facials = 20,000
* Cooling of drinks = 10,000
* Logistics, unforseen contingencies = 100,000

This must be a big party. But will 12 crates of malt be enough.? We used 20 crates. And besides, bottle water is #350

Phema: Congrats Dear! May God bless your Home.

Where did it hold?

Amen and thanks. At Alaba international.

Phema: Friends and relations can never do it well like professionals. After all, you are not paying them. And then, the remaining foodstuff disappears into thin air afterwards.

Dnt put anything in any family care. I did traditional last friday. We cooked starch and banga soup for my family and efo riro, egusi and semo for my in-laws, we later bought fufu to suppliment the semo. After persuading my mum to use all the native dry fish of close to 15k to cook the banga soup, they dished everything home using all my coolers. I was ashamed. My in-laws and others they brought along didnt eat nothing. Church members nko?

I just did mine on saturday. It was wonderful even though the rain disturbed us seriously. Pls for those planning, dont invest your life saving in it ooooo. No matter want you do people will still complain they didnt eat or drink

victorazy: and I keep puring my own in nylon

You see ur life??

slap1: Bro, which state is that? No vex.

maybe Lagos and precisely Lekki area

Work as a teacher, earn more than a banker. This can only happen when you study hard and move to the island, like lekki and it environs.

Social studies teacher, we gave her pakolization
Reason: the period when she taught us socialisation, she was heavily pregnant and used plank(pako) to flog the hell out of us.

PHE teacher, ori bobo, yam head. Reason: he always call students dat.

Lit in English teacher, period over
Reason: when she was teaching animal farm and we got to the singing part. Beast of England, Beast of Ireland........ The bell was rung for break, she refused to leave the class and students started singing Period over, period over, period over fat woman, period over (with the tune of Beast of England) .... that was the end of Lit in English for SS1F students cos she refused to enter our class

CRK teacher: Okeke the mother
Reason: so so wicked, but sometimes caring. She likes those bearing Vivian

Social studies teacher, we gave her pakolization
Reason: that period when she taught us socialisation, she was heavily pregnant and used plank(pako) to flog the hell out of us.

Im impressed. The police are doing their doing job. I read the story sometimes ago. Continue till you get to the root.

I have been so scared since sunday. The make-up artist that wants to make me up on my wedding day came around to do a test on my face. The blade mistakenly cut her, she cleand it and turn the other end. I didnt want to sound rude by saying pls dont touch my face again with ur wounded fingers. So i just stayed calm, when she turned the blade and used tissue to tie her finger. When i bathed, i found out that one of my eyes brow is peppery me. Since then, fear dey catch me o. Cos i dont know her HIV status

Good morning sir,
I loaded this morning and transfered the money but got a message that reads "sorry, service is unavaliable try again later" then i checked my balance, my credit was gone. The number is 08148410510.
Now, i cant transfer money to the line i initially transfered credit to. When i tried from another line, i was sent a msg" you cannot top-up 0803*** because he has open transaction. Pls help me retify this.

damibravo: 7. am i jobless?

YES

Perfecter4real: Are you guys kiding me? 65likes for this boring comment.

You didnt read it. Its very interesting. I laughed real hard

I entered a danfo bus from okoko to ajangbadi and sat at the back. I just kept pressing my phones. From the left, i was sitting on the third seat, the man on my left hand was doing like someone that wants to throw up and asked me to come to his seat, and he sat on my seat pretending to throw out spit thru the window. When it was time for me to get down, i stood up, he stood up too and started behaving like someone dat's convulsing and kept pressing me against the other chair back, oh, i was saying sorry to him. (infact people were saying sorry, madam abeg wait and he was busy opening my bag) When the conducter dropped the seat close to the door for me to come down, my instinct told me check ur bag. Immediately, i looked and my bag was opened and i shouted my purse. Lo and behold, my purse was on d seat i stood up from. Imagine 4 phones wen i dey manage. C3 and other 3 nokia torch fones