₦airaland Forum

bennyann:
I don't understand all you said. I just wondered what could have happened to me if I had replied your pm.

If you are a Christian, then it hurts. And you are not stable with your accusations due to the bolded.

These are the people who misrepresent Christian men and make one have a bias judgment about them.

Nairalanders have taken heed to your advice. They will be careful of me.

I tried my best not to say the below but I guess I can't hold it in anymore.
Learn how to control your temper if it seems one doesn't give you attention. You don't in turn carry out this act of wickedness. Some commented on this thread before even sending a pm but you made no comment whatsoever but tried sending me a pm on the 13th. I tried scanning through your posts on nairaland and saw nothing to make me reply your mail. I was just waiting for something to encourage me replying your mail but I had none. Then I saw you eventually made a comment here on the 15th with some accusations you have no proof of. I was happy to see you comment so I decided to give myself the chance to have a chat with you directly from here. I tried to make sure there was no misunderstanding only for you to prove me wrong.

Shouldn't I then be grateful all ends here?

It's people like you that make ladies not to reply pms. People like you that call yourself Christians that's if you are and you can't man up to a lady. You feel rejected when no one has rejected you, then you reacted by giving false accusations.

You're free to do this to me over and over again as long as it's on nairaland only but be careful not to do it to others. Learn from this behind your phone screen. You're free to reply and vent more of your frustrations but I'm sorry if I indirectly caused it because seriously I never meant to.

Thanks for passing by and please do have a nice day.

Gosh! Today has been so bad chatting with strange nairaland guys out of nowhere. Whoever is using an alternate moniker to get to me, please be real, I prefer those I'm familiar with. At least I know their thoughts and can easily relate with them not with you I know nothing about. So please, reason with me and don't vent your frustrations on me whoever and wherever you guys are.

Yes I did try to send you a pm some days ago mainly cos I saw your post about tribulation so I wanted to support a fellow christian and this was why I tried sending you a pm. Only for me to detect in your utterances that you could be a false christian.
With the way you are throwing the fact that I sent you a pm and you didn't reply around here as if to suggest that you are a princess that should be sought by men makes me to believe that you have not learnt to respect men. How many times have we heard stories of brutalized wives coming out to say that their now wive beating and adulterous husband was very humble and nice when they were dating? You need to realise that a good man will not chase you much. You claimed that nothing in my profile gave you a reason to reply my pm as if I stand to gain the most if we had discussed via pm. In regards to my post here, I mainly comment on how nigeria is a zoo filled with evil people and at times I try to be sarcastic. But that doesn't mean I'm not a christian so leave my posts aside and face the accusation of falsehood which I have made against you. You didn't reply my pm probably because of the fact that I criticized your friend 'mzlady' of being catholic which made you scared of me since you know that a man that knows that the catholic church is false will probably detect that you are a false christian.
You claimed that your brother, oh sorry! You claimed that I can't man up to a lady. First of all what do you mean by man up? I sent you a pm before I detected that you could be false, you chose not to reply and I then advised people here not to automatically believe that anyone who throws the debate about topics like the tribulation and rapture is a true christian. how does that prove that your brother, oh sorry, that I can't man up to a lady?
You think I value such things like 'maning up to a lady'? Am I a hipop rapper that I will cherish such things like bouncing up to some 'cool chick' and chatting her up? Or are we in high school? Instead we pick out the true christian modest woman from the multitude of false christian women like you cos we are professional christian men.
My advice to people here is that you should watchout for false christians that speak of topics like the rapture in order to deceive and get themselves true christian husbands or wives.

bennyann:
This is interesting. Make una see me see trouble ooo.
Do you see me begging for a husband? And yes, I find it difficult to pretend because I will be caught within seconds and if no one catches me, I will expose myself because my heart can't stand it.

And please I need proof to the bolded. This thread consists of things that seem to be against Christian men and there you are saying I'm looking for their sympathy. Where? Online? you no know me.

And also please, do you love me? If you do please tell me cos I don't understand where you came from to start throwing accusations at me. But I tell you, it won't give you the opportunity to know me outside here. Except you pretend to get to me through another moniker and that's for those of you with multiple monikers.

At least, now I know I didn't misunderstand you.

Evidence to the bolded please. You went around looking for loopholes. I know something annoyed you but I wish you will spit it out and not let it control your judgment. Please check yourself.

And may you not fall into the hands of a 419 who you think she's not. How will you feel if you judged someone wrongly especially someone so close to God and God doesn't joke with her? If somehow you find out she's Godly, how would you feel after all these drama and what do you think should be your reward for that?

If truly you're a Christian, beware man and let the Spirit guide you. If you're not a Christian then I will understand.

But there are other ways to get my attention than losing me like this.

Why should I tell you where your utterances make you suspect? I won't tell you so that you will not be able to use it as a defence in the future in case you happen to be a false christian.
You just admitted that your topic is against christian men, now why will a true christian woman create a post against christian men?
Do I love you? Lol. Do people love those they have not seen? Plus your utterances have given you away, I don't believe you are a true christian now.
You really think I will change my account just to contact you? Just who do you think you are? So you don't need me, right? Only the man needs you, right? Carry on with that philosophy and end up with an adulterer, paedophile and a wife brutalizer as a husband. You girls don't want to listen, right? You don't want to believe that a good man will not chase you much? The man who you believe is humble cos he kneels for you is the one that will brutalize you. He is only chasing you cos he has not married you yet, once he marries you, he will start giving you slaps just before he cheats on you. So you need to start respecting true christian men.
No one attacked you here, but I have the right to tell people here that a person can still be false even though she speaks of topics like the tribulation and the rapture.

bennyann:


I laughed and laughed and laughed out everything within. You're so funny. But please next time mention me now

You said 'dangerous issue'. What's dangerous here? Is there something you're not saying? You better start talking now.

My my! The bolded is so funny.. Analice107, MZlady39, Muafrika2, please come laugh with me.

Besides, I was in a confused state when I created this thread. It's very unlike me to voice out my personal thoughts but it was coming to a time I felt I should forget looking out for a fellow believer but I knew it wasn't the right way to go, so I came here to voice all out and surprisingly I got my answers and I also got my thoughts cleared. Thanks to the ladies in the house first, then to the guys. If only they knew how they've helped.

Let me put all my jokes aside. You get to know if one is good not by what she tells you but by what you've seen her do and by words she speaks from her heart. Yes, people pretend but if you're really a true Christian man, you should be able to discern. No one can claim goodness for long. Character smells and if you're watchful, you would notice.

People who are good don't really say so, but their words and works speak for them.

Haven't you heard of 419 or fraud? Do you think it is difficult for a false christian to pretend to have the christian character just so that he or she can get a true christian husband or wife? I won't have commented if I did not spot holes in your story. I see you have started topics here on areas like the tribulation and rapture which may make a person to automatically believe that you are a true christian but yet some of your utterances here have suggested that maybe you are not a true christian, not that I am accusing you of being false. Not everyone that speaks of the rapture is true, they could still be devils.

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The dangerous issue with this topic is not the fate of the good, godly girls but the fact that some people may tend to believe that a woman is good and godly just because she tells us so. What is she is lying in order to poach herself a true christian man? So don't get carried away easily, anyone can be anybody.

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The False christian assocation of nigeria trying to deceive people to belive they are fighting for the righteous cause whilst they are for the devil.

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MZLady39:
Part 2....
BennyAnn,
What I'm coming to realize in this Christian journey is that our timing may not be God's timing.
Now I must say, I made some terrible relationship choices (which definitely delayed & blocked potential suitors)....and paid the price. The thing is I knew that the guys weren't the "one", yet I wanted to satisfy my flesh....so I proceeded.
I, also, personally wasn't ready for what a God ordained marriage truly consists of. I would've been divorced or in jail.
However, there are many reasons why people may be single at later ages....
Folks shouldn't be so quick to judge.
Especially in a country where I constantly see headlines in the Family section on NL where nothing but crises after crises are occurring.
Ask yourself if you are ready to take the second most important step in your life?
Why do you want to get married? What is the purpose for you and the guy? Will God be glorified?
Marriage is not about "self".
You clearly want to be married. God knows it...and perhaps He still needs to do some finishing touches on you....or perhaps on him.
Be careful who you allow to speak into your life. Words are very powerful..you must keep a positive mindframe & dwell on God's view about you.
Be encouraged...
Sorry so long

Wow. Initially you portrayed yourself as a good girl that has been let down by the world and bad men, only for you to reveal yourself as a previously bad girl who lost the good men because of her badness. Just don't give bad advice here that will make young women to miss their true love at an early age. A potential good mate can come around when you are in your early twenties, if you miss him or her, another good mate may not come around in years.

bennyann:
Sometime ago, a man told me "good girls like me are the ones who turn out so pitiable and they eventually settle down with men that aren't noble or Honourable while the bad ones end up settling down with wealthy and Honourable men and tend to be treated like a queen as though they never lived a despicable life"

I immediately renounced it by replying that won't be my portion and he'll live to see how God would beautify my life to the extent he would wish he had swallowed up those words.

But after that scene died down, I thought to myself - is this man not saying the truth? Because I looked around me and realized most ladies have things going well for them and even settled down with high caliber of men one never thought would settle with them.
But I thank God and I'm happy for such people because I do spend time praying for such people when I feel if they continue with that lifestyle, it may lead to their regret. So it feels so good to see them blessed and prosperous and especially, settled down with their own family already. I mean that's a testimony But what that man told me began creating fear in me.

LESSONS LEARNT
Though I sometimes get scared of what the man said but as a Christian, I shouldn't allow that and I think if what the man said come to pass, it would be because of some of my behaviors and principles I ought to change and which are:

1. I have to minimize the way I stay indoors or just keep to myself. I have to let go of the fear of going to New places, making new friends and getting to know people all in the name of protecting me. If God has protected me this far, He can't leave me now.

2. A strong mindset of being in only one relationship which it's a must it leads to marriage. I desire so much just to be in a relationship with one person in my life. I hate with a passion being in a romantic relationship here and there, not to talk of the imagination of being touched by different people all over the place. Eeeeeeeww.
But what do I do when such a relationship doesn't work? Should I then kill myself or force it? NO

3. Being in a relationship with someone that's as Godly as you or should I say more Godly. Some persons especially pastors to be or pastors because of the height of purity they believe they've attained in life makes it difficult for them to overlook some mistakes their partners make which could have easily been overlooked by unbelievers or 'the not so righteous'.

I desired being taken to the altar by a Pastor but I doubt that now. Because it seems those in the world know how to love their woman than the so called Holy Ghost filled men.

4. I shouldn't give too much attention to those who claim they love me or they just want to be my friends. I've observed most men don't like to be given attention by the woman they claim they love, even the so called good guys. It's like it's in their nature, immediately they find out or they think you care too much for them or you love them way too much, they then think you can't do without them. This makes them take you for a fool or a non entity. No wonder good guys get married to bad girls and vice versa.

That makes me wonder, when they get married, should their wives not care for them or give them attention as they desired? I doubt if they would find that funny

This 4th point should be my No.1 lesson but I don't think it would be easy for me to go by it. Because my heart is filled with too much love to give out. To me, it takes more than a strong heart or a strong decision not to care for those you like not to talk of those you love or cherish. I hope I get to that point though but it will really hurt not giving attention to the one you care about.

5. I should not love first. I should be the one to receive love, enough of it before I can say yes, it's time for me to give back love.
This is a major lesson I've learnt but it's also the one that would really hurt if I have to make the person who genuinely loves me and is not blinded by ego go through that. He doesn't deserve it.

6. I no longer believe in the platonic kind of friendship between members of the opposite sex. I'm a kind who do have one close friend at a time depending on the change of environment and it turned out guys have been more of my close friends than the ladies. Though ladies are more comfortable with male friends but I think I can advise that the opposite sex shouldn't be a 'best friend'.
I realized it doesn't actually turn out pure as people portray. And that's because one of you might have developed or will eventually develop what I can call a Sexual kind of feeling towards the other. And guys out there who doesn't want to come closer to you for friendship sake but for relationship sake will find it difficult to come closer to you and may eventually quit and that's because they see what you don't see or what you pretend to never see.

After my platonic friendship with the second or third guy, I came to the conclusion that there's nothing like 'best friends' between a guy and a lady and that's because I got to know they had feelings for me in one way or the other. Though some denied the feelings, I eventually got to know through how they tried having a feel of my body.
That shows there seems to be something going on behind closed doors so I wouldn't advice anyone to get so close to the opposite sex in the guise of best friends. I also wouldn't advise anyone to leave his or her partner in the friendship of the opposite sex.

What's my fate then? I'm waiting to see because I refuse to be a good girl gone bad. I won't let the words of men that want to destroy me change me. I won't let the failure of good or Godly guys loving me change me. If someone like me exists and can still love then there should be someone for me out there who is good, Godly and still knows how to love.
I refuse to be among the good girls who end up badly. God help me.

I hope to look back on this thread and smile that I made it, some time in the future.

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Are you married or single? Let me know your view of good, Godly single girls, the advantages and disadvantages.

Point 1: its not about going out more often, its about knowing where and how to find a good guy.
Point 2: you should be able to tell if a guy is good and marriage minded in a few months of dating. If he is not good then leave the relationship. This will help you to stay away from multiple relationships.
Point 3: who told you that so called pastors are good? Why not marry apostle suleiman who likes having sex with multiple women.
Point 5: you are wrong. If a good man that genuinely loves you approaches you and you stay back so that he can prove his love to you first, he will see you as proud and he will dump you.
Point 6: you can have male or female friends, if you wish or do not wish to go into a relationship with one of your male friends who is good then you can.

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JustinSlayer69:
I have a friend in Australia. Made citizenship as a Dr in 5 years flat. 2012 - 2017.

Come back to develop Nigeria. He plans to... too

These people criticising our zeal to develop Nigeria think we don't have the means...They don't know we don't want to be house niggers.

Get education, make money there...but your fatherland would still remain the same. Contribute your quota towards development instead of whining constantly and running like a coward.

you are a goat. when that your friend from Australia comes back with his family to develop zoogeria they will probably be attacked in his village by some violent, jealous, deceitful, backbiting and barbaric goats that will kidnap him, rape his wife, and mutilate his children in order to get quick money.
The Nigerian​American guy in the attached pics tried to come back to develop but see what he got, he got butchered.
Nigeria is a zoo where the citizens are just like goats.

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Okuda:
To God who made me, If i see any foreigner in nigeria walking free, I would harass them and ask them if they are legally staying in Nigeria. There is no single foreigner in Nigeria that is being harassed walking around or being racially abused. But we are the first set of people that would lash out at other tribes for being in your state in the same country!

Try it and you will see them use their foreign dollars to hire mopol to whip you with koboko

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why do great players get critized? adebayor is a world class player. he even played with real Madrid under Mourinho. he can jump high and head like drogba, he can turn and shoot in the box, pass, shoot and score from outside the box, dribble, he was a complete striker but yet some hater says he is lazy. he was a first team player for Spurs until pochentino came with his philosophy. adebayor is a great player and arguably one of the best strikers from Africa.

Ordinary boko Haram is disciplining the Nigerian army yet they will be forming as if they have power. they should better remove their American abandoned but repainted ships as well as their old school jets before it gets sunk. people are starving to death in Borno but yet they want to form as if they are a military power. their own house is on fire but they ignore that one to attend to another country's issue. Nigeria is nothing but a useless country whose citizens are just like goats.

Get out of here! it's not ambode,s fault, it's your careless driving. it's is these same people that will be shouting go, go, go, go, when they see you driving defensively in front of them. on 3rd mainland bridge, I drive slowly and I stay on the lane close the demarcation so that the car will not go into the water if an accident happens. I see all these careless drivers speeding and jumping from one lane to the other.
just because the road is clear, that doesn't mean you should speed up. your tyre can bust, the tyre of the car in front of you can bust, the rod that connects the tyre to the car can come off, road workers can appear in front of you, that's why you should drive slowly and carefully. but they won't, instead they want to speed form bad guy. now pose and form bad guy with your broken leg. say hi to those in igbobi hospital for me. next time you will drive slowly and carefully.

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