₦airaland Forum

Dyonne:
It's not necessarily because the guy doesnt trust the woman, sometimes its because he doesnt trust the male bestie.

Many of those people you call besties are just waiting for an opportunity. #tradesecret

The it speaks less of the woman of she gives herself up to be a woman of easy virtue. She might not be worth your time after all.

Acidosis:
Yes, when you open your legs for him. That male bestie will sleep with you when the opportunity arises. So think again, is he really a BESTie? A man that will take advantage of you when the opportunity arise?

So what kind of a woman will is open legs for a man that she's not married to?

I am trying to not bring scriptures here. But I guess I'll have to. Me I'm a Christian and I do Christian relationships. It means I don't entertain any appearance of evil.

So I guess my pedestal of measuring platonic relationships is different from yours.

zexy2030:
But this Romanoff sounds religious sha...well I understand ur points, when u r married its advisable to do away with d male besties, men can be animals a times as women walk around with fish brains and ever dynamic feelings.

I'm not religious. I am a Christian. There's a difference between the two. To say "men can be animals" reminds me of the common cliché "men are dogs". I've seen more than enough decent ones that has made me strongly disagree with that assertion.

Maybe I should start taking it seriously based on your comment.

Designerdollars:
just shut up abeg
All these girls with terrible IQ points sef, if they put your brain in a bird, I'm certain it will fly backwards.
Men and women don't have anything in common to just be "friends" .
All these besties are 99% in most cases beta orbiters hoping to Bleep you someday.
And it's girl's with low self esteem that keep alot of men as friends.

All the conversations were civil till the apple that didn't fall far from the tree arrived.

If I engage in a squabble of insults with you, you'll deactivate your account. I choose not to, kindly don't mention me again.

bukatyne:
Hopefully, all will not leave the second ear

That your hope fit far o.

Plead:
Show us your real picture.

Sack of beans

Rotfl. Back of akpu like you.

bukatyne:
Maybe our definitions of 'friendship' is different.

Like LordK.O says often, friendliness is different from a friend.

Yes, every woman tweaks her man.

Tweaking people is not a bad thing , It is when you complain your guy calls you once a week and he changes to three times; he says he doesn't like fresh Titus and you start to fry it; he says he doesn't like you fixing 30in weave and you reduce it to 18; you don't short sleeve native and he starts to sew them long sleeve.

It is any change you accommodate or carry out to please your partner.

Your principles or template or cake is constant; you change the icing on it.

There are minor things that can be tweaked in the name of love and compromise, I get it. But there are some traits in people that if you force to change, you've turned them into what they'll never be happy with.

To avoid all these "I'll change her, I'll change him", go for someone who shares the same values as you. Amos 3:3 talk am say "Can two walk together unless they agree"?.

See this bag of Eba. Has this his claim been proved by further research?

bukatyne:
1. The OP clearly states some characteristics younger girls might misconstrue to be 'boring.'

2. This thread is to avoid the juvenile stage (if possible).

Trust me, the ladies that fall into this category probably won't open the post and if they do, e go enter one ear comot for the other one.

bukatyne:
There is a difference between male friends or buddies and male besties. The post talked of male besties.

And I tell you that even after you pick someone with same values (the template) you will still tweak once in a while. Humans change, nobody is static.

So why can't any of the guys I spoke of be besties?

I've got two male besties and two female besties. They are also engaged to be married and our friendship is pure.

So the woman also gets to "tweak" the man like she's calibrating medications?

bukatyne:
1. Thank you, I do not buy into the deception of opposite sex 'besties'. Can you define what having a life means?

2. Let's talk: what is the use of a male bestie for a lady who has a boyfriend? What is the place of the boyfriend? What is the place of the bestie?

3. We can flip it to 'why should she end a relationship for friendship that can end tomorrow?' Remember in my disclaimer, I am not talking of casual relationships.

4. What if your woman suddenly finds herself in a new crowd because she moved to a new environment or picked a new elective?

5. & 6. Until humans start moulding their spouses, there will always be something you don't like when you move closer or something they develop you have to nip in the bud. I call it a perfect template that needs tweaking once in a while.

Hope you found the tread useful.

Modified:

I see you updated your post.

The point of the thread is to enlighten younger girls to understand what boring is not.

I hear and see it all the time and when I ask why, they begin to list qualities that should make a guy a hot catch.

Maybe you should have started with what they mean by saying certain guys are boring.

It is quite possible that some of the reasons might be juvenile but the need of women change in stages and with time.

bukatyne:
1. Thank you, I do not buy into the deception of opposite sex 'besties'. Can you define what having a life means?

2. Let's talk: what is the use of a male bestie for a lady who has a boyfriend? What is the place of the boyfriend? What is the place of the bestie?

3. We can flip it to 'why should she end a relationship for friendship that can end tomorrow?' Remember in my disclaimer, I am not talking of casual relationships.

4. What if your woman suddenly finds herself in a new crowd because she moved to a new environment or picked a new elective?

5. & 6. Until humans start moulding their spouses, there will always be something you don't like when you move closer or something they develop you have to nip in the bud. I call it a perfect template that needs tweaking once in a while.

Hope you found the tread useful.

Are you saying that every man that is friends with a woman is going to sleep with her? I've had male friends that I could talk to about my relationship to get a man's perspective on things. I have male friends who are my movie friends or male friends who are my friends from school, mostly post graduate school. I have male friends from church who are even married and they help me pray and grow, especially now that my wedding is coming up.

A friendship can't just end tomorrow, you know this too. I'm sure you still have friends from your primary and secondary schools. Why haven't they ended?

A wise woman selects her crowd. If you have to keep pushing her to make better choices about the crowd she moves with, it's either she's not ready for where you're going, so look for another woman or that kind of crowd is exactly what she likes.

Choose someone who shares the same values as you do. Only God is the potter that can mould man. I've Seen people who try to "mould" their spouses into who they are not regret it terribly.

Pick someone whose values aligns with yours and who you can live with bases on their character or flaws, not based on how you would like them to be.

I was okay with all you said until I saw the male bestie part and then, some of your comments made it look like a woman can't have a life just cause she's hoping to get married.

A woman can have a male bestie and it will be a pure friendship. Any man who can't handle a woman who has a male beat friend should just leave her alone and go for one who doesn't.

Why should a woman throw her friendship away because of relationship that might end tomorrow.

Instead of controlling the crowd she moves with, why not look around for a woman who flows with your kind of crowd?

This kind of thinking makes it looks like a man should change a woman to suit him.

How about you look for woman that suits you in the first place?

The happening guy verse boring guy part. See ehn, every woman has what she wants in a man. Some like the happening guys and some just want a quiet life.

I've seen these fast life girls marry a boring guy and still want to club why husband is home. I know one sef that left her baby at home while her husband travelled so she could go clubbing.

Just have the right qualities you want in a partner and date with a purpose. My two cents.

Thank God they are not kissing the asses of their French masters. They should go to America and Italy to test their vaccine.

Kekereekun123:
We have important things to worry about

I swear.

You fit kill person na. You are a psychopath o.

benuejosh:
Africa will shock the world. Ordinary, the death rate in Africa should have gone high but we're still on the low. Africa will be able to contain the virus and end the spread. Who knows if the cure will come from our herbal medicine? Anything is possible. My opinion.

Who ever created this virus probably targeted Caucasians and mongoloids.

Moralgladiator:
Tell your God story to the birds,they have a better chance of believing you.

I am not forcing you to believe me. My God didn't ask me to force His gospel down your throat. It is cause you asked questions that I gave you answers.

Shalom.

Moralgladiator:
Story! Lord Karma awaits you for ever.....

Karma has nothing on you when eternity is waiting for you. God saving you is not so Karma can destroy you. I mean it.

shege45:
annulment is also a legal term. ok let me rephrase my question , you frown at fornication but encourage annulment? I thought marriage in church was till death do part

If a marriage was contracted under false pretence, such a marriage can be annulled.

And being divorce isn't a sin and long as there is no remarriage. That is why I said she and the guy can both look for solutions to his sexual issue and continue with their marriage.

Moralgladiator:
Aunty who we go ask if you are still a virgin? Liar!

Even a non virgin can still repent and her past won't count to God. Even an armed robber.

That is not the issue here. The issue is to repent and give your life to Christ. All your past sins would b blotted out and God will forgive you like it never happened

You won't see them on this post.

The ones that don't have what to say are using emojis.

shege45:
you frown at fornication but encourage divorce.

Please educate yourself on an annulment.

zexy2030:
which church do u worship in

There's no need to say which church I worship. My church won't qualify me for heaven, my walk with God is what will.

dontrulee:
one question I have for you.
have you seen the Lord?
how does he looks like?

I've told you my own. Let them who have ears, hear.

inspirator1:
.
"annulled"...is agreement and super-gluing right?

Read up what an annulment is.

The Indian approach made laugh so hard.

Na cane be that o. Egba, koboko

For light wey no dey?

dontrulee:
what if the guy is a virgin and doesn't know that the problem existed before he got married?

They can both look for solutions. Just cause he can't perform does mean the marriage should be over.

dontrulee:
will you keep quiet?
all you holy holy people are hypocrites.
holy Spirit ko, dirty spirit ni.
I pray you don't have infertility issues in your marriage.

Without Holiness, no one can see the Lord, you can say whatever you want, that's what His word says.

inspirator1:
.
But na divorce GOD dey clap hand for? Sometimes we give more than necessary advice.

Not any time in my post did o say divorce is okay. No put word for my mouth, dakun.

Amumaigwe:
You see him 3 times a week for prayers. After you are gone, his side chick then sees him for anointing service. Everybody is happy.

Well, Christian relationships are not for your kind. He's not a man like you, the work of God in his life has made him develop more self control than your carnal self has.