₦airaland Forum

You should watch the show. it's from Friends.

Fiction. the date is 2016. (Cactus beat me to it)

Rachel and Joey, Monica and Chandler are friends. Joey loves Chandler Rachel, but when he proposed to her she said she didn't feel the same way about him. So, she solicits advise:

Rachel: So I thought Joey and I would be okay once we hung out, but it’s not even like we know how to be with each other anymore.

Chandler: I know it’s tough now, but things will get better.

Rachel: How do you know that? What if it just gets worse and worse and worse, to the point where we can’t even be in the same room with each other?!

Chandler: I’m not great at the advice, can I interest you in a sarcastic comment? Some cheese?

Monica: Okay, I-I’m sorry. You and Joey, your both focusing on this uncomfortable thing, what you need to do is to change the subject. Next time you see him try to get him talking about something else.

In the next scene, she follows the advice:
Joey: (entering) Hey!

Rachel: Hi.

Monica: Uh I really don’t know what to tell you Rach, I really don’t. I mean, maybe Joey can help you out with your, with your big work problem.

Rachel: What?

Monica: Yeah Joey she’s…Rachel’s got this really big work problem, and it is a head scratcher. Wow! (To Chandler) Y’know what, if we’re going to make dinner we’re going to have to leave. Yeah. (She and Chandler exit.)

Joey: So you uh, have a…big work problem?

Rachel: Yeah it’s umm… Yeah it’s uh… It-it’s y’know—It’s nothing.

Joey: Huh. Okay. (Awkward silence.) So uh, I think I’m going to take off.

Rachel: Yeah—No wait! Joey no wait it is. It’s something. It’s-it’s umm…it’s my boss.

Joey: Yeah?

Rachel: Yeah, and umm my baby.

Joey: Yeah?

Rachel: My boss wants to buy my baby!

Joey: What?! Oh my-oh my God!

Rachel: I know I told you, it’s a really big problem.

Joey: What he wants to buy your baby?!

Rachel: Can you believe that?!

Joey: That’s crazy!

Rachel: That’s what I told him!

Joey: Okay, how did this even happen?

Rachel: Well I’ll tell ya! (Pause) See uh my-my boss and his wife—They-they can’t have children. So umm, and that—we were at the Christmas party, and he got drunk, and he said to me, "Rachel, I want to buy your baby."

Joey: Man! When you said it was a problem about your boss and the baby I figured it was something about maternity leave.

Rachel: Ohh! Yeah! (Pause) Yeah that-that would’ve been a much simpler problem.

Unfortunately for her, Joey takes her fabricated story too seriously:

[Scene: Office of Rachel's Boss. he’s in a meeting as Joey bursts in.]

Rachel's Boss: May I help you?

Joey: Do you think you can just buy my friend's baby?!

This leads the boss to arrange a meeting with Rachel. She's afraid she'll be fired:

[Scene: Office of Rachel's boss, Rachel is knocking on the door.]

Rachel: Morning. You wanted to see me?

Boss: Please, come in. Have a seat. (She does so.)

Rachel: Okay look Mr. Zelner…

Boss: Oh I think it’s best that I speak first.

Rachel: Yeah. (Motions for him to continue.)

Boss: I’ve asked Lee from human resources to be here as a witness to our conversation.

Rachel: Oh God.

Boss: If I in any way implied that I wanted to buy your baby…I am sorry. Okay?
Last week when I asked you when your due date was, uh, I certainly did not mean that I felt that I was due your baby. Yeah, I want to be very clear that I understand that it is your baby, and it is not mine to, er, purchase.

Rachel: Well, as long as we are clear about that. (Exits smugly.)

Later:

Joey: So? What-what-what happened?

Rachel: It’s all going to be okay. They’re just so happy that I’m not suing them that they gave me one extra month paid maternity leave. "So long as I understand that the money should not construed as a down payment on this or any other child that I should bear."

Funniest thing in the world!

[font=courier]Rachel: Joey, I’m really sorry that I lied to you. I was just trying to make things…

Joey: I know. I know.

Rachel: It kind of worked. I mean y’know, I don’t know about you buy I haven’t thought about our thing since all this.

Joey: Hey you’re right. Yeah, it’s kind of been like us again a little bit.

Rachel: Yeah I know! I miss that.

Joey: Me too. I mean I…haven’t thought at all about how I put myself out there and said all that stuff and how you didn’t feel the same way about me and-and how it was really awkward.

(Awkward silence.)

Rachel: My gynecologist tried to kill me![quote][/quote]

I agree. There's this girl I left for this reason. I consider myself a more straightforward person than she is but she thinks I'm going to hell or something. bye to her! ;d

it's not the beauty of the shopping centers that matters. it's about how much people's lives are impacted positively. If you are building massive complexes but your people are dying of hunger, something is wrong somewhere.

Did you read the [url=http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Colossians%202:8-17&version=9;]complete passage[/url] I linked?. i'm getting rusty, but i can find others.

Well done charlisco. it seems we have been able to gather many people interested in graphics. Why don't you invite your friends to join?

According to the new testament, Christians are not supposed to worry about Jewish customs.

7. The family never argues over which Web site to visit this evening.

People argue a lot about which tv channel to visit, but not over which website to visit. isn't this an advantage of the Internet over TV. is arguing over tv somehow good?

ignore prodgalson. He has an agenda that's not straightforward.

All the top posters on Nairaland are yoruba, so i want more Igbos to register. i will stick with Nwoke!

I'm sick and tired of this masochistic attitudes. "my teacher used to beat me mercilessly and i owe my success to him". Then when we are talking about men hitting their girlfriends you'll be complaining. Why won't they hit you when it seems to make you love them more. Nonsense.

In school I was at the top of my class for some years and I do not owe it to any stupid beating. When I failed french in JSS1, my father simply got me a (non-beating) lesson teacher and it eventually became one of my best subjects (in JSS3, I actually chose french instead of CRK when given the opportunity). Perhaps the other students were being beaten mercilessly at home, but I was cane-free and I was out-performing them.

So please stop this nonsense. If I have time to spend with any child, I can make him/her a hardworking student without raising a cane. I wish i studied Psychology; I'd be able to explain better. You people are killing me!

He was caring, but didn't hesistate to beat the rubbish out of you

Perhaps that is what your future husband will be like? Beating you up in a 'care\ing' way?

I have only been inspired by one teacher. He was our chemistry teacher for a short period in Senior Secondary School. Mr Fodeke. He arranged practical classes for interested students after school hours. All we had to do was ask. He would even go to the workshop to fabricate missing lab equipment for us.

http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Colossians%202:8-17&version=9;

16 Let no man therefore judge you in meat, or in drink, or in respect of an holyday, or of the new moon, or of the sabbath days:

I've just discovered Craig Davis. 7 days is solid!

Did she decline? No
Didn't she mind? I don't think so
Was it for real? Damn sure
What was the deal? A pretty girl aged 24
So was she keen? She couldn't wait

His voice is really good. Good enough to listen to!

I use dial-up internet on the Multilinks Network.

Hello, your degree is just one more bargaining tool you use to impress potential employers. Do you have the skills they require? There are people who are getting jobs even as others are sitting at home, so why are you not one of them?

The true problem is that people have the expectation that a degree should guarantee of a job. If the problem is that current employers are not smart enough to recognize your value, then here's what you should do: create your own job, simple!

Is it really true that he messed her up?

I'm in the mood to buy some international music, but if I'm not sure which musicians to check out.

I want to buy music with good lyrics, but more importantly I want the music to be rendered by a musician whose voice is simply excellent. Examples of musicians I know whose voices are excellent include Celine Dion, R. Kelly, Corinne Bailey Rae, Christina Aguilera and maybe Fantasia Barrino.

Can you give me examples of other contemporary musicians whose voices are really good? I don't care if they are popular or not, but they must have that raw voice talent to be considered!

Wow. Her voice is really excellent. I prefer her rendition of "don't know why" to that of Norah Jones. Excellent!

I still like the song. Her voice is very good and the production is without blemish.

Christians who follow the teachings of Paul do not follow Sabbath. That's the simple biblical point of view. aAd yes, the Sabbath is on Saturday the Seventh day of the week. but it doesn't apply to Christians (says Paul)

Why do I want to smack some players right now?