bukatyne:
@Paul8000:

There are two issues:

1. You do not have a good relationship with your wife

2. You do not have a good relationship with your kids: you were not involved in their upbringing. The last two like you because they are young and unaware of their surroundings. As soon as their mom can influence them, you will lose them also.

A. First, you address the kids individually as follows:
1. Engage them as adults. Tell them you love them, care for them etc. and as their father, they have to respect and obey you in return. If your life is a reflection of your religion, you should make a parallel between you as a father and God/Allah as our father.

2. Tell them that you are not perfect and would have tussle with their mother however, it is not in their place to support their mother (except you are endangering her life) and they should always respect you.

3. Understand their peculiar challenges and address them.

B. Engage your wife and allow her air any grievance she has. You mentioned she told the kids you cheated, did you?
Address the grievance one after the other and also tell her your own grievance.

Thereafter, tell her that you both MUST have a joint agreement on discipline and training for the kids. If she has any reservations on what you do, she should address it with you in private. Ditto you too. Tell her to also stop discussing your shortcomings with the kids. She should address you, in private.

Then you gather your family together and address them. Lay down ground rules and create family bonding times through meals and prayers.

You also need to live a life of example and honor to your kids especially.

It is very shameful for you the husband of the home to be sitting cowardly in the car because you have a bitter wife (which may be your doing) and unruly children.

I have two threads: one on fatherhood and another on husbandhood.

Goodluck Mr. Paul

this person have given u the simple solution. Remove your pride and act on this accordingly. Negotiate with your children, beg them for forgiveness, treat them with love and kindness, also tell them the truth about the issues between you and your wife. Finally be a good man, a good role model and give them something they can respect u for.

How much

This is the car I want but I can't afford it at present. I pray God answer my prayer soon so that I can get this car. If na to sell the one I get now and add money buy this one no wahala.

That is why the south remain were they are today. They need to wake up and work together. Good brains without productivity is useless.

The current governor of rivers state, nyesom wike should indicate interest to contest for president come 2023. He has performed absolutely well in his state over the past four years, and still doing well in this second tenure. The state has really changed due to the actions of Mr. Project.

Secondly the south should rally round a single and good candidate to rule the country and that can close the divide and difference between the west and the east.

Wike has not made to much political enemies. when he commissions projects he invites people from all works of life across the country, automatically measuring as a bridge builder.

Some how we should allow peoples performance speak for them for greater responsibility . Wike has tried as a man and a politician.

My taught though . and I am not a politician.

I have somehow noticed that buhari wicked policies against the southern Nigerians are indirectly helping to unite the southerners.

They are never aware of anything.

In a normal and sane country, people like wike are the ones qualified to run for president because his track record in River State over the past 3 years have shown that he has the interest of the citizens at heart. Wike is really working for the people of River State. He is the best governor in Nigeria presently. I urge other state governors to learn from him.

The belle nor dey big pass so since? The same size of belle for many months now. Na WA o.

It's called change.

He is hybanating.

SheikhMuniru:
WHEN IS NIGERIA PLAYING ANOTHER MATCH?

Today by 10pm

Lagos is a country inside Nigeria. FG need to go to Lagos to learn how to govern Nigeria. Lagos state has really gone very sophisticated. I hail all the past governors and the present one for their continuity of governance.

fools and illitrates

This is her ploy to get America or Canadian visa as assilom seeker. She will claim her life is in danger because of her same sex marriage desire, she will use it to contact the American embassy and they will grant her visa as an asilum seeker.

Hahahahaa you are funny.

wink2015:
Na so the thing first dey start.

I wish them happy married life.

Which kind faces be all these ones. So hungry looking. Buhari what have you done to all these people.

Nice reply

It's only God that will help us. The doctors in Nigeria are just too selfish. Why should an employee who is happy be insisting that his fellow employees don't get happiness.
The employer increased your salary and you are telling the employer not to increase the salary of other workers in the organization even though the salary increament will not be as high as their own. This is wickedness.

Pay Parity, Equity and Equality among Healthcare Professionals: UK vs. Nigeria Example

By Daniel Okpla Onaji

Twines of conscience twines me like a meandering snake when I ruminate on the senseless debacle that has engulfed the Nigerian health sector for years now. Historically, the Nigerian medical doctors uses the Nigerian Medical association (NMA) or the National Association of Resident Doctors ( NARD) and other affiliates to persuade the government to either increase their wages or prevent the government from honouring agreement with other healthcare workers. Hardly has the NMA gone on strike to press for improved infrastructure or the alarming state of decay in the health sector.
Pay Parity can be defined as the state or condition of receiving equal income, allowances and/attaining equal socio-economic status. Equity is defined as the quality or state of being fair and impartial to all concerned. Equality is defined as the state of being equal, especially in status, rights, or opportunities without discriminating against others. Everyone has the right to chose the profession they deem best for themselves. . It is ones' choice to be a medical doctor, and another to be a nurse, radiographer, laboratory scientist or physiotherapist, all working to deliver best of care to the patient. In the UK, the health sector is seen as a multi-disciplinary sector where team work is enshrined in healthcare delivery for the overall benefit of the patient
In Nigeria, the salary of most other health professional is less than 40% that of the doctors at entry point and most will need to work for about 15 years to get to the grade level of a newly qualified medical doctor. To earn the same as a newly qualified medical doctor, most healthcare workers will have to work for about 15 years, assuming they receive specialist training and promptly promoted.
Recently, other healthcare professionals in (the NHS) England got an increment based on negotiations with all their affiliate bodies without a query from the British Medical Association(BMA).When it favours the NMA, they refer to international best practices. A quick comparism of pay parity among doctors and radiographers in the UK visa-vis Nigeria will help, as follows:
In the UK (2018), basic salary for junior doctors/foundation year 1 (FY1) starts at about £26,614 rising to £76,761 (specialist medical consultant) .It takes about 19 years to progress from FY1 to specialist consultant in the UK.
Basic pay for a newly qualified radiographer / (band 5) is £23,023 rising to £62,001 (Band specialist or consultant radiographer. As a radiographer, it takes about 15 years to progress from band 5 to band 8.
In the Nigeria (2018), basic salary for junior doctors (CONMESS1/GL12) starts at about N240,000 rising to about N850,000 (COMESS 9/GL 16 (specialist medical consultant) .It takes about 10 years to progress from house officer to specialist consultant in Nigeria if you pass your examinations..
Basic pay for newly qualified radiographer / (CONHESS 9/GL10) is N140,000 rising to about N500,000 (CONHESS 15) deputy director, radiography. As a radiographer, it takes about 23 years to progress from senior radiographer to deputy director if you achieve professional skills and duly promoted.
The above comparism, although confirms pay parity, but clearly contrast the huge pay gap between a newly qualified medical doctor and a newly qualified radiographer in Nigeria visa-vis their UK counterpart..
Yes, the NMA insists parity is "sarcrosant" but denies that parity has been implemented ab initio entry point for the doctors. In 2009, the federal government approved CONMESS for medical doctors and CONHESS for other professionals and workers in the sector. At the entry point, the pay disparity between the two salary structure fall short of all know international best practices for equity. This injustice was further entrenched in 2014, against the tenets of the 2009 agreement, the federal government approved an upward adjustment of CONMESS for the doctors without an equivalent upward adjustment of CONHESS for other healthcare workers.
In the UK, pay parity is implemented only at entry point and any further pay negotiation between the NHS and any trade union is implemented without the fury of BMA. Most healthcare professionals or groups can earn as much as they can clock in their hours based on service needs and skills/expertise. So you find a radiographer clock so many hours and may earn more than a specialist registrar whose services are not needed as that of the radiographer. Will Nigerian doctors allow this to happen here?.
NMA is opposed to other healthcare professionals becoming consultants working in the hospital. In the UK, a radiographer can rise to become a specialist /advanced practitioner radiographer (reporting plain x-ray, cathlab, cardiac CT, cardiac MRI, etc) or consultant radiographer ( mammographer, cathlab, ultrasound, etc). In the UK, a lot of Nigerian radiographers, nurses and midwives carry out ultrasound services but Nigerian doctors do not allow Nigerians radiographers/sonographers including those returning from the UK to practice especially in the teaching hospitals where the doctors hold court.
In the UK, all the managers/heads of departments/units of NHS radiology are radiographers, working side by side doctors/radiologists who are appointed as clinical leads. The same goes for biomedical, physiotherapy, etc including the private hospitals (BUPA, SPIRE, BMI) where even non-medical mangers hold sway.
The NMA is opposed to the appointment of other health care professional as minister of health, minister of state for health, chief medical directors, chairman medical advisory committee, heads of departments and units including department such as radiography, pathology, medical laboratory etc. In the UK ( as well as most parts of europe) , the secretary of health and chief executives of most NHS are non-doctors.
Jeremy Hunt is the current secretary of state for health and social care in the UK and holds a degree in philosophy.
I recall the uproar when prince Julius Adelusi ( a pharmacist) was appointed minister of health. The NMA fought him to a stand-still because he was "not medically" qualified to be appointed minister of health in Nigeria
The birth of JOHESU is the greatest hope of liberation of the health sector from the mundane perception that the ministry of health belongs to doctors and doctors alone. JOHESU stands for Justice (not Injustice), Order (not anarchy), Humility (not arrogance), Equity (not inequality), Service (not slavery) and Unity (not disharmony).
The NMA needs to imbibe these values in order to move the health sector forward.
The way forward is for Nigerian doctors to put their patients first, understand that the health sector is multi-disciplinary and team work is the only way forward for service delivery in the interest of the patient . At the moment, they pay lip service to team work.
The times have moved on from when every other health worker is seen as part of the doctor's tool. The days are gone when the doctors built schools of nursing, medical laboratory and radiography awarding diplomas while doctors alone got MBBS degree from the universities. Knowledge and technological advances now demystify most skills including healthcare. Knowledge boundaries are getting thinner. Patients now demands more choices, knowledge and rights about their treatment never like before. Artificial Intelligence, telemedicine, virtual reality learning are tools knocking on everyone's door and demands a more open approach to patient treatment.
JOHESU and other healthcare workers must demonstrate that patient is the king and the reason why everyone is in the business of healthcare. The place of the doctor as a clinical lead must be sacrosanct, as is the practice globally. Also, Doctors do not hold exclusive knowledge in human resource management and other professionals with pre-requisite knowledge and skills must be allowed to manage our health systems. Any agitation for improved condition of service of healthcare workers must have patient interest at the centre.

#thereality

It's obvious the problem with you is just stupidity.
I can see now that most doctors are just concerned about the money only rather than give quality medical care to people.

You guys are just filled with wickedness and hate for other health workers. You have to go back to school to learn how to read and understand before you come here to say trash.

Point of correction to all the doctors JOHESU is not seeking for pay parity with doctors they are only seeking for pay rise. It is the minister of doctor (professor Isaac adewale) that induce that word into the picture. He is also a doctor and as such he is doing their dirty bidding for them.

The doctors claim that they are the only important people in the hospital so now JOHESU have gone on strike they should do all the work by themselves alone. Go and look at all the hospitals they have become ghost towns.

Stupid selfish people who call themselves doctors my foot.

Elueme:

I wish u could digest the NMA position before posting this crap..
NMA is not against pay rise for anybody but ask that relativity be sacrosanct according to international best practice.. A doctor with several academic battering and fellowship struggle cannot be on same salary scale with a nurse or pharmacist.. forget the age and all, the quality of service isn't same irrespective of how old one has been in service. We must learn to respect professionalism in this country.
Johesu was formed to hang up against the doctors in the health sector because they feel with their strength they can arm twist the government.. Some of it's demands ate briddled with ego, jealousy and desire to reap where one didn't sow. The door is wide open for any who wishes to study medicine. No following short cut, go back to school and be accorded same status.

At least its clear where the problem in the health sector is coming from now. The doctors don't want other staff to enjoy a little increament of salary even after government has increased their slararies more than Three times in in four years. This is just a case of wickedness and man's inhumanity to man. The doctors are not the employer of labour but they are telling government what to do. It's a case of eating alone and wanting other people to die of hunger even though there is excess food to serve everybody. Let the world see how wicked the doctors are in Nigeria.

Let me tell you the truth early this year the government of Canada increased doctors salary but the doctors refused the increament and told the government to use the money to pay other health workers and improve the facilities in the hospitals for patients to enjoy. But in Nigeria the case is opposite.

OK o. In Africa?

2017 was a year filled with many vision and revelations from supposed men of God. I have been wondering were all those false prophets who prophesied buharis death in 2017 are today. I wonder why people use the name of God to lie.

.

When will these people leave goodluck Jonathan alone. It's almost three years since you people took over power but yet Jonathan this, Jonathan that, haba.

English language. I reserve my comment. Thank God for you though.

These are chinco, they are not whites. Most of their conditions worse pass our own here. Moreover chincos are stingy to the bone.

Maybe they work there.

Animals, hypocrits, is ibeh kachikwu the minister for petroleum? Why don't you suggest the sack of the animal you have as the president and the minister of petroleum.

Nigeria my Nigeria.