₦airaland Forum

parents should be able to use their discretion when deciding such. a 13yr is a child, so is a 4-6yr old.

why wouldnt she beg? hardly, any surprise there

Emeka, whats item and item day?

beans and corn or beans and platty for you?

instant castration

yes esp when both parents don't learn to separate their families from politics

there is nothing as "perfection" in life, talk-less of marriage.

good marriage? yes, happy/peaceful marriage? yes. perfect marriage? no

the things you describe as more like steps to at least "good"/peaceful marriage

wrong section.

try the Travel section

Ok

has she returned? are you still going ahead with the adoption?

sudan ke? oga o

ranging hormones you know makes them want that "puppy"love na the same hormones will also make them cry back and blue when the "puppy in the love dies. moving out of the house would depend on where they are. i mean, if its naija, parents hardly let their kids out at that age just like that. and also, moving out wouldnt be the best option for her, as i understand/assume she probably wants her to "wait till marriage" and moving out would limit her influence on that. she just need to get a machete and chase the boy to his fathers compound, he will leave her alone by force

i think agatha kind of addressed the topic in a way

Dear Agatha, I want to learn from you on how to be more than a wife to being a woman. Please help me understand the task ahead of me and how to manage my home without problems. My fear is that my husband-to-be is a very stubborn person and I am short-fussed too. I don’t have a clue as to how to manage him or blend my personality with his.

"Marriage is a journey of tumbles, upsets, endurance, pains, disappointments, considerations, compromises, as well as victories. To survive, a couple must first and foremost be friends because it is the only way they can manage the challenges of two strangers coming together to make a home.

As a woman, you have to be determined to ensure he is happy with the choice he has made. One thing you must never do is listen to what others think of your efforts to turn your home into a haven for your husband and children. Be rest assured that there is nothing feminism in marriage. To try to equate yourself with your husband, question his authority, dishonour his decision, and disrespect him is to court trouble in your home.

Whether you like it or not, your role as the woman is to offer him protection through prayers. You were created to support him in life and once you are very clear about this, no matter how stubborn he gets, managing him won’t be a problem. Even though he is the head of the home, your role in his life is to show him the way by your own examples. Men generally are like babies who respond with care, friendship and trust to the one who cares for them the most. As his wife, you have to be the woman in his life, as well as his mother. As his wife, you have to attend to his home, his emotional needs while as the woman you have to learn to respect him. God, in making the woman, created her to support the man, stand by his side, use her seemingly fragility to get things done for him. Position yourself in his life as his strength, ego and pride, friend, support base and his think tank. Make sure he does nothing without discussing it with you by always being there for him. As a woman the secret of your strength is your fragility, as well as your emotions. When he becomes unbearably stubborn: use the fragile part of you to get him to listen to the voice of wisdom by going on your knees to beg him. No matter how educated you are or well paid, the fact remains he is your crown and only a stupid woman rubbishes the crown that makes her shine.

However, for this to work,[b] you must have imbibed from the beginning how to respect him. [/b]You cannot rubbish him in front of people and expect him to honour whatever overtures you make at home. Respect begets respect. He must have evidence of your willingness to follow his leadership before he can listen to what you have to say.

Granted, this adjustment doesn’t come easy but there is nothing in life that comes without plenty of sacrifices, especially the good ones. Something has to give for that thing you want the most to come to reality. This is your role as the woman in his life.

As his mother, you are to pamper him as you would your own child. This includes indulging his excesses and reprimanding him with love. Mothers don’t nag their children, so be careful you don’t nag him into running into the arms of another woman. No matter how imperfect a child is, the mother’s love is always there, unconditional for the child to come back to. A mother, even when everyone brands her child as bad, sees hope at the end of the tunnel. You must therefore be prepared, be patient enough to outshine his deficiencies as a human being, especially if you also keep it in the front burner that you are equally imperfect.

No sacrifice is always too much for a mother to make for her child. Your marriage is your womb, your husband the child. Unlike the conventional way of conception, this one took place in your heart; the heart is the life wire of the body. While the womb holds the mystery of life, the heart holds its glow. There is no way you can divorce the existence of the womb from the heart whereas the heart can survive without the womb. Therefore if you keep your marriage in your heart as true mothers do, no matter the disappointment, aches and betrayals you suffer in your marriage, you will never be discouraged to fight on.

As for his stubbornness, it can be managed with the right temperament. Once he gets obstinate, quietly withdraw and allow him have his way on anything he wants done his way. For the sake of peace, give in to him at the point he wants anything done his way. Naturally, this requires utmost patience, as well as tolerance but you have to grow a thick skin to deal with it. This is due to the fact that two captains cannot live in a boat. There are always other ways to get him to listen to you. When his mood is right, you can then go to him quietly to lay your complains and by then the cloud of trouble would have passed away.

To achieve a happy home, you cannot afford to be stubborn physically. Rather, deploy the stubbornness to your spiritual life. You can always pray away from his life those aspects of him you don’t like without fighting him or nagging.

Marital battles are best fought on the knees rather than with blows. Taking your marital problems to God everyday is the key to your happiness because God is fair and impartial. If you listen to Him, you will never go wrong and would help you achieve effortlessly His desires for you and your home."

will his ego stand the test of time?

ishe willing to do the house-works or will the wife take-on the "second shift" when she returns from work?

how old are you and how tall are you?

my home kitchen

im also surprised [b]blacksta [/b]says he never heard of brown eggs. i mean this eggs dey plenty in naija

brown eggs

[img]http://www.grit.com/uploadedImages/GRT/blogs/Lori/bowl-of-brown-eggs.jpg?n=6672/ [/img]




white eggs

[img]http://t3.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcRxPHgtsN3-uyR-_4vMJRYr0heFq9juAx6zLrH4r_aDE5pr4_0&t=1&usg=__i-JsRWsfHHWkO64eS9PIq9B4vDU= [/img]

only share stuffs that are necessary and will not impede the function of the marriage in the present or future. i dont buy into all those "no secrets in marriage" somethings are better not shared. and how will you be sure sef, the other person is indeed telling you all their "secrets"?

yes shes been a mom but her approach is not the best at least for the time-being. her daughter is a teenage, going to be young adult, wanting puppy love is normal esp at their age. i think her mom needs to have real-time discussion with her and quit all those threats of "reporting her to the pastor" bs and accusation of fornication.

so you don't wholeheartedly agree that with the Drs assertion?

[quote author=Busy_body link=topic=249630.msg6495537#msg6495537 date=1280749861][s]
Would be back indeed, took me the better part of 2 days to come up with the gibberish and jargon,  er. . . er. . . coughing. . . er. ,  mere 170 line contribution i wrote up there Anyway moving on swiftly :-[ [/s][/quote]LWKMD!!!!!!!!. my lawd have triple mecri!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! . roftl! very funny woman!

I use myself for example, when I begged for a new car he refused, meanwhile the old one I was driving has already gone down the heel, you know reckless some of us women drive    he completely refused I begged for over 2 months, the dude refused, wetin I no use beg?  , now listen , I have a career of my own I might not be able to buy a lamborghini but i sure as well could afford something nice, I said ok, there were times when i had to drive to work with his(though stole the keys) , and let him find his way around with a taxi, he'll just laugh it off,t hey are times i did hop on taxi's and buses infact i got so good with the bus timetable     and could tell you where or when it departs, 4 months after my first asking I got what i asked for as a gift, i did not contribute a dime but i got one, infact he surprised me that even till date when i think of it i just let a tear or two fall down my eyes

LOL


i quite agree with you. there are good men and good husbands out there and i think the key is understanding them and owning(in a good way thats) them and to do this, there must be some sort of supportive submissiveness from the womans part. i tell-ya, many good wonders can happen when a woman learns/knows how to tame her man. handle them and you will have your forever stamp on them . but Jenny, what happens to the good women who are very royal, i mean in every sense of word of that 'submissiveness' but are still treated like doormat by husbands, yes evil shouldnt beget evil etc but we musnt forget that some men out there have the heart of a bulldog

LOL @ BB you forgot the other ones, "others are still married" "you will bring shame to the family"

wetin come happen?

blacksta:
Interesting but as mentioned by others on this thread - Why is brown difficult to cook or taste funny and basically any kind of white food must be dangerous for one ?- what about white sugar.

it takes longer probably because unlike white rice, brown rice still has its bran. it takes more water to cook. some people do pre-soak it in warm water hours ahead before cooking and i guess the bran also plays a part in the taste too.

personally, i dont think there is big difference between both sugar nutrition-wise. the brown sugar gets its color by the reintroduction of molasses. although, the molasses though contain some mineral but only in a minuscule amount/quantity so it does nothing, no difference between the two sugars. both are still empty calories

i have tired organic brown sugar and i have personally, noticed that i tend put more of it than white sugar, because i feel like i dont get the sugar taste quickly like white sugar. so i stick with white sugar. but brown sugar tastes better to some and also its the better option when it comes to baking.

the same thing with brown eggs and white eggs that some people claim that brown ones, are more healthy. that too is a myth the difference in color is due to the breed of hen.

abeg jor, go and take more classes in creative stori telling

bodi dey oh. how you dey?