bros,
what you can do is to learn a digital freelance skill that you can work remotely with.
that way, you can be saving and plan to either return to naija or stay back without her.

Op,
I feel your pains but the truth is that you cannot fend fpr your family presently.

My advice is to concentrate on your apprenticeship and probably send monthly allowance to your wife's account however small. This will do two things for you.
One, show that you are responsible
Two, show a trail the you are sending money for their upkeep.

I am sure you will still bounce back after the apprenticeship.

God bless

Op.
Marriage requires wisdom. Glad you said your wife has some good parts.
For the food part, let the nanny continue to make the food. It is obvious she does not like cooking so you can relieve her that job role.
At least you are sure of your meals and let the nanny have a timetable of food you want.

Sex can be an uphill task especially if you live in lagos that you are in traffic an avg of 6 hrs a day so it can probably be once a week.

The truth also is that some women lose their appetite for sex after having children. Whatever the case, you need to find out wat ticks your woman and put her in the mood. That is an assignment for you.
You need to also decide if your marriage is worth it without sex. Think abt it.

It is also easy for women to feel used and unappreciated because of the effort they put into the marriage. So my advice is for you to take her on vacations, help her let out steam. Let her know that her effort in the house is appreciated. Women wants affirmation so you cannot be tired of telling her your love for her

Also try n buy her little things like perfumes, lingeries, bags, shoes etc. sexy stuff frequently.

Now if all these does not work, talk to her n find out if she needs a break. The truth is that staying married can be tiring at times especially if there are unwritting rules, regulations and expectations from everyone.

A lot of people dont also appreciate what they have until they lose it.

I wish you all the best.
Buzz if you need to talk.
My 2 cents of my 23 yrs of being married.

so bros,
why can't you marry her na ince you are confidants and you trust her 90% which is a lot of trust for people getting married nowadays.
I am sure she has learnt her lessons , is ready to settle down and you have known her for so long and for that reason, she is better than anyone u just want to start knowing now

Good day Op,
From my experience, I think such things are seasonal. As we grow older, we become more liberal and we tend to keep things bothering us to ourselves.
From the way you sound, you have done well for yourself. Your wife is reasonable too because if it was some other women, they will raise hell by just by the smell of alcohol on you. I will advice you speak to her about it or if you have someone you look up to, you can talk to the person too or your first child if he/she can handle it.
Things always get better and your case will not be different.

sent 2.5gb for 2 days on mtn to u. best of luck

hmm its a tough call.
bin married for 22yrs and trust me, wifey and I
just had our first big disagreement this september
which we already resolved.
for me she is the best and when i come back, i will love to marry her.
When you know u are married, then u are married.

it is domainagents that the client spoke through and i am not sure they work with DAN. i dont know the client directly.

hello all,
A buyer used domainagents.com to get in touch with me for a domain i own.
after we agreed on terms, it was transferred to escrow.com which does not work in nigeria.
now i was asked to open a wise.com account since escrow.com can transact with wise.com.
has anybody used wise.com before. how do you upload money to wise.com from nigeria. i tried using my dollar card but it was rejected..

any other advice please

hi all. someone requested through domainagents to buy a domain from me. after bargaining, i agreed for $400 and the guy agreed so the transaction was taking into escrow. Since 17th of October, he has not made payment to escrow so we can continue the process.

any advice please?

cry cry,
no be who call police dey win case.
such arrogance and disrespect.
Abeg oga divorce her for your dignity. he no get sense

Just seeing this. Hope you feel better now. You are thinking too hard. A lot of things you dont have control over and even if you did and messed up, you dont have to be too hard on urself.

Relax, be positive and know that something great can come out of this situation.

Buzz me if you can. Ready to talk.

Op. It shld be between u n God. God is forgiving but man is not. You need to know how matured ur hubby is before u can tell him such.

Hello Op,
Life is not a straight jacket.
I was earning more than my fiancee wen we started dating to the extent that i paid for a house for her to stay

She got a bank job and started earning more.

Then i got a bank job and my salary was 4 times her own.

I think if you see a guy that is hardworking and has tenacity, him earning 100k now does not mean that will be his peak. It is also important a woman earn some money to support in the house. It helps in joint decision making. I am sure you have heard some men boasting that their wife does not have a naira in all he has achieved.

A woman shld be a help mate not stand aloof not helping at all.

In this economy, both hands shld be on deck in carrying the family up.

My 2 cents after 22 yrs of marriage

You think you are not deserving of him but the truth is he feels otherwise. Rest your mind. At least he was the one that asked you out so he is not walking out on you yet.

And if he walks away, that is not the end of the world.

Thonia69:
That username though

person wey no get skill? let him learn a skill first or else tge money is a waste. even if to learn how to sell okrika. it is a skill. bo manner can come from anywhere.

tell her parents.
that is the only way u can help her

bros,
have you asked her to be your babe abi na 1312 AD tactics u wan use?
Nothing is assumed abeg so ask her and hear what she says.
Nobody wants to commit to a non-committal person.
make the bold move and thank God u are not pushy.

why is he insisting?
it is not by force to have a joint account with your spouse especially if the spouse is not well disposed to it.
he must understand that.

and for you, what are you hiding that you dont want a joint account?
you guys can agree on what percentage of income will go into the joint account
so both parties have their personal account and the family is run on the joint account.

think of something u can do for yourself.

he is a loser. dump his sorry ass. you are better off without him.
a man that cannot encourage you to become the best and give you stretch goals is not want you want.
that job he is boasting about, is it his fathers company? cant he be booted out?
clown

dont waste your time.
the best you can get is wat you have now.
he will not divorce his wife to marry you.
the mistake u made initially is thinking you are in love with him
it was a feeling of attraction and it usually blows away after a while.
try and ask him if he will divorce his wife and marry you and see the reaction on his face.
men are not emotional to these things so don't think of divorce.
please dont ever tell anyone abt this. As God for forgiveness and just move on cos
people are not as gracious as God is.

you never know what you have until you lose it.
a lot of women are praying just for half of that man you want to discard.
so you think bringing up the children by urself is not more damaging that what is happening now?
And you think Bishop will encourage you to divorce based on this flimsy excuse?

grass is greener on the other side till you jump in and see it was actually colored and not real green grass.

you definitely do not reflect your upbringing

?Bro,
you did not do well.
You are the head of the home and you should be more considerate in relating with your wife.
They do more than we do at home so I think sometimes, it is good to oblige them.

Now you are feeling guilty which makes you a good man.
Please avoid anything that will cause you hurting your conscience.
I dont think you need to show you are the man of the house by starving your wife.
Showing that you are the man is a bit of childishness.
my two cents after 22 yrs in this business.

OP, Do you really know the meaning of love that you are claiming you love a lady you met this January?

If you really love her, her past will mean nothing to you.

Bros, we know what you want so abeg free the babe so.

Your brother needs to upskill himself.
Looking or waiting for A job does not make sense at this time.

As an engineering graduate, he shld be able to learn how to write programme and get freelance jobs.
He can also try online businesses like affiliate marketing or writing kindle books.
A mentor can put him through.