₦airaland Forum

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Frigga13:
Be like you Dey snore for speeding Honda bike .. of course you’re not married

Make your husband .. even if the useless simpnask you not to go and you .. based on today marriage you leave go..

Na when you go understand that simp .. Na man with prick..

Una go just come online they render una fellow females useless and unmarried with stupid statements ..

You obviously see why you’re single with teenage brain

A woman wanted to travel & to see her sibling who invited her because they'd not seen in more than a year & her husband says no. She involves her parents & pastor & even her best friend, they all have different opinions. Some said go, some said stay.

As a married woman, whose words should be taken in highest regards?

1. Her siblings that she's spent all her life with
2. Her parents that gave birth to her
3. Her pastor that sees visions & guides her spiritually
4. Her husband
5. Her best friends that she's known from childhood

Let's have matured responses from experienced and responsible nairalanders.

E be like say brain dey pain you
No be everyone like suffering like you

Have a plan B.
A skill or business or degree(s)

When you say you manize, do you just flirt with them abi una dey nack?

See entitlement o

It is easy to blame our parents until we become parents too and have to do the things we expect from our parents.

I didnt propose.

Who get time?

The first thing i do is tell single ladies i am married. Most of them just say 'ok' and act like i never told them.
they will be watching to see if i still want to ask them out. Bitch, i am not interested in cheating on my wife!

It doesnt even turn them off knowing that you are married, and when you tell them you love and respect your wife and have never cheated on her, they get more interested. It is like they dont meet many responsible men out there, and when they see the few ones, they want to have a taste or what?
God will continue to help me to resist. The hardest ones are the ones with big yansh but so far God has been helping me to resist still.. and i shall continue to succeed and no strange woman will come between me and my wife by God's grace. AMEN

you are so heartless, inconsiderate and insensitive!
So he should die to prove he loves you abi? is it a crime to ask your hand in marriage?
if it is me, your family members will suffer in my hands.

Me too o.. I was surprised. The favouritism shown by parents is what makes that 'special' child spoilt or frustrating.
Say what you want, but it is evil to let other kids know you have a favourite child.

9jaRealist:
Sorry, but I couldn’t get past the “one child that you love”…
Does this mean some of you do NOT love all of your children?!
>

I want to read the full report. Kindly cite the source

Hvae your own kids and it will reduce the attention and space they occupy in your heart.

And since you are already sweet to them, they will be nice to your children too as cousins.

Madness, them go turn am to GWR competition like Ekiti people

slawomir:
Damnnn niggar
Ogbeni make una give am grand children make them dey follow her play


By the time she bath grandchildren three times
Depression go run leave her

good advise

My wife's brother said the same too.
I spoke to my wife and her parents maturedly and they supported me. They even called the guy to calm down on the threats, he refused.
We eventually got married and he didnt attend.

Now that the deal is done, he is looking for ways to make amends and be friendly but na me no want.

360command:
that definition of doubledating is actually wrong.. many Nigerians use that term "double dating" wrongfully. It actually means having your friend, colleague come with their date as well as you with your date to go out. Double dating isn't having multiple partners.

Some words and phrases have colloquial meaning.. Urban Dictionary describe DoubleDating as 'Someone that is dating two people at the same time.In between monogamy and serial dater.'

But i still appreciate your input, thank you for the submission.

your rent should not be more than 2 months salary (700k - 800k).
As a single guy, stay in a room. If you are engaged and planning to marry, get a room and parlour. You dont need two bedroom unless you have kids. if you must rent a room and parlour, then it is because you need to carve out a side of the parlour/room as workstation/office

you cant use 36k (72liters) fuel per week in lagos. you'd have to drive 70km daily to and fro to exhaust that much. unless you use a V6 or V8. I drive 35km to work and 35km back and i use 8k fuel weekly (i live outside lagos tho)

you are supposed to change oil every 6-7,000km unless you buy tyres per month or MUST spend 30k monthly. otherwise, that money should be one-off, not recurring.

Limit your gen usage to a a couple of hours per day and mostly use it for weekends. Do everything with normal electricity while there is light.

Outing, family house contribution and eating outside should stop. Since you are mobile, take food in a flask to work from home. Dont buy clothes or shoes monthly!!

Most importantly, save at least 100k monthly from your salary.

360command:
what do you mean by doubledating?

I had multiple girlfriends despite the fact that i was broke nd unemployed. Being broke will force you to use other gifts you have (eg Confidence) to win a girl over, else konji will kill you

It is only difficult if you don't get a job after university. Have money or plenty confidence!

I'd say I had better luck after I graduated cus I was an indigent student while in school but when I went back for Msc, I had better fún and it only got better after my masters.

I was unemployed for more than a year after MSc but I was doubledating even then.. Till got a job, switched jobs and got married.
Now I'm retired and focusing only on my wife.

We4all:
Why did the woman go with her baby? Enlisting in the army in Nigeria is a suicide mission. It ain't worth it.

she didnt enlist. she wasnt there to join the army. She went as a guest to go and celebrate with her family member that was doing POP.

Are you saying she is supposed to have left her baby at home?

Steve0979:
Broda man u absolutely right.I am a serving personel too but I detest d army pass shit,everyday naso I go just dey tink in regret y I joined.its just no anyoda sure means of eating for now sha Mk we still dey manage den go

But it's funny how those northerners are dying to join, despite the fact that they ship them off to war zones immediately for up 5 years o to go and die.
They just want to wear the uniform and die while the officers remain in barracks getting jumbo allowances

So I attended the recent POP for soldiers (84 Regular Intake) at the Depot Barracks in Zaria last Saturday and what I saw actually left me traumatised.

First, the guests were made to queue from 4am till up to 12:30pm, despite the fact that they stopped allowing guests in since 10am.
Secondly, they were flogging the visitors for not maintaining a straight queue.

By visitors, I mean parents and family members of the new soldiers o. There was a male & female queue, occasionally they'd just say the queue isn't straight and dash into them with whips.

Old people carrying food & drinks for the ceremony will run and scatter here and there with foods pouring away everywhere, yet gather again with hope of getting in to see their loved ones.

They claimed the event is open, yet they suffer people that came just for their own amusements and entertainment. Almajiris were robbing people on the queues and they didn't bother.

Instead they're exchanging whips and descending on old people & friends of their colleagues. Even the female soldiers joined in and they're just having fun while at it.

A woman lost her baby. She was backing the baby and the baby died due to the pressing & stampede when soldiers were flogging. The people of Zaria were already used to it.

Most businesses around PZ area of Zaria didnt bother opening that day. Last year they claimed a guy died too in the process of flogging. Apparently its a regular thing and it never got to the media. I know only officers have value in the army & soldiers are treated like pawns but to see the parents of soldiers treated like that was traumatic & heartbreaking.

I didn't see whom I went to celebrate with. Some of us that came from outside the state and experienced the culture shock too didn't bother humiliate ourselves by joining the queue and we went back jejely.

For anyone that's attended a military POP, is it always like that for soldiers or Zaria's case is just unnecessarily brutal? I'd like to know please.

You write too well to be a security guard.

God will open better doors for you

You have made a lot of sense. A family of 4 will have to live frugally to manage 25k weekly, prices of things are shooting up. And God forbid there is any medical emergency o
Someone like me spend 10k weekly on fuel alone cus i work 35km away from where i live. Car parts and servicing costs are up the roof. I wonder how Nigerians arent revolting and burning up politicians houses yet until i see people earning this low and i start thanking God.

45k a month!!!! And we are still supposed to save for investments and emergencies. ahhhh... it is well with us in this country o

joebeckz:
N40k salary for a family man?
I feel very sorry for your situation even if that isn't your fault.
Your former Job affords you the time to do other things if you are industrious. Do not spend it with family at home. Go out there and do other things.
Examples are buying eggs from farmers to resell, small scale farming or part time Uber. Just look around you and tap into the opportunities around to fill a large part of your life and that of your family. An average family in Nigeria now cannot live well with 200k Salary.

When I go through receipts I pile up in my car compartment. I realise how much things have become pricey. Weekly shopping for the basic needs for a family of 4 now cost as high as 25-30k minus luxury. And we have people earning as low as 15k. Pathetic!

God help us in this country.
Our leaders, present and past are cruel.

OP, do not settle for less please. You deserve more.
Go back to the first job and have an extra means of income no matter how difficult it is. Learn a skill if you can't improve your qualification, it is better to die trying than to never try at all.
I pray for you and many others in this same place.

Cheers!

They've realized they could make so much money from rigging and will do anything to not miss the money.

During the presidentials, they were in a hurry to deliver for their pay master

Congratulations

I have been following all your stories and have learnt alot about marriages from you.

May you get an even better job soon. Try create side hustle too, raising triplets isnt a joke.
If your wife wants to come back, consider her for the sake of your kids. I dont blame her cus it is not easy to live in poverty, even as a man (you are a bit comfortable now and will know what i mean). if you remarry, their step-mum may maltreat them or the new wife may naturally want to have more kids.

I am quite surprised all the hospitals didnt tell you it is a normal thing for someone that is sexually inactive.

I guess they just want to make money off you via the scans.

The truth is that if you are sexually inactive, your sperm 'tank' will be 'full' and then you go to poop and the poop is hard, it will press the sperm sac and you will have some droplets of discharge. It is not a medical condition that you should spend a kobo on.

If it bothers you so much, take mild laxatives that will loosen up your poop abit and you will see that it will stop. If it stops, your body still needs to get rid of the old sperms for new ones and you will still be experiencing wet dreams. Do not worry yourself at all, you are perfectly healthy

the solution is distance.. Dont try to force your wife to communicate with her.

Your wife and your mum inlaw seem to be good people. I am not sure I wont spark for my mum if she said such hurtful words to my wife, but then my mum respected me alot and knows where to draw the line.

If you consider it disrespectful to talk to your mum about her not-so-pleasant character, dont talk to her about it. just limit communication between her and your wife and inlaw. The distance will bring respect. If respect doesn't come, the distance will still bring peace of mind.
If you visit her and she talks about your wife, tell her you want to skip that particular discussion for the sake of your peace of mind.

All in all, pray for peace in your family and continually ask God to touch the heart of your mother. One day she will come back sober and try to make peace, accept her with all your heart and move on.

People pay property tax in Nigeria, so dont talk about what you dont know. We are overtaxed in Nigeria without anything to show for it. Do you know how much Land Use Charge in Lagos is? Do you know how much you'll pay to the government for permits when building?

hammermcc:
Only in third world African countries do people bury the dead in their compound.even south Africa does not practice such . burying of the dead in their compound is bad for real estate.
I have mentioned on my other thread that Nigerian needs real estate land reform. we can not afford the current method if Nigeria will be developed.

In fact , most Nigerians do not pay property tax . and yet you expect roads and street lights and public amenities to be fixed? there needs to be compulsory property tax which will deter people from thinking the land belongs to them forever and therefore burying dead on the land.
people should pay heavy property tax if they want to own a home. if you can't afford property tax then rent an apartment.

you are just mad!!! See as i dey laugh

Dreytonisback:
This mumu , she go dey hide yansh wey God give her for free
Even Simi wey no get yansh dey show breast
Tiwa dey show yansh and even toto join
Niniola dey show yansh steadily
Teni no sexy so no level
Seyi shay dey show yansh
Yemi alade dey show yansh
Ayra star dey show her small yansh

This one wey God bless with the yansh go dey hide am make men dey salivate

Cardi b show yansh
Nicki Minaj show yansh
Steff London show yansh
Ms banks show yansh
Rihanna show yansh with breast join

You wey just start yesterday you they form otherwise, well thank God for wizkid's featuring
By now na ordinary music producer for they use you shine

Lights up my kpoli in peace

Her behaviour towards you guys is exactly what your brother allows and tolerates. Hold your brother responsible, not her.
If he is too weak to be a man in his own house, then his wife shouldn't be blamed for that

Rachel98:
Good morning everyone. Hope we're having a wonderful week.

My Elder brother is doing well, no doubt he's the breadwinner in our family But his wife is so rude, too authoritative, she's full of pride and she looks down on people. She see everyone as her employee, she does not care if her actions or words hurts you, she's quick to slap at any slightest provocation. She's an event planner, please are event planners this rude??

She's the main reason why we barely visit our brother, despite we all live in the same city, we feel like a total stranger in our brother's house. Probably she's using "jazz" on him, I don't know But everything she does seems cool to him.

I managed to spend the weekend with them, since on friday she act like my presence irritates her. The maid prepared semo and vegetable soup, i don't eat swallow that like, so she saw me cooking noodles, she rudely said why're you not eating semo? Why are you people so selective? Then she left the kitchen. I just maintained my cool.

Yesterday she slapped her maid just because the plantain she told her to fry wasn't brown enough (maybe she wanted burnt sacrifice plantain). My elder brother calmly said honey you shouldn't have slapped her just becus of plaintain. The next she told my brother was "Defender!! go and marry her nw"

This morning, I jejely packed my belongings on my way to work, I entered my brother's car so he can drop me at the bus-stop, I just told him I won't be coming to his place anymore, once I'm done with work today I'm going home straight. And the annoying part, he would be asking me why? As if he's blind, he can't see how rude and ill-mannered his wife is.

His wife has really separated my brother from us, his own family. We don't even know what to do.

I think your marriage is over.

Noah9:
Good morning nairalanders. Pls I'll go straight to point.

My wife and I have been married for 3 years, God has blessed our matrimony with a beautiful daughter. My wife is so decent, caring and beautiful inside out. I have been a great husband and father to my pretty daughter. I have never cheated on my wife since we got married.

Recently, she barely give me sex. Infact it would take a whole month before I could see Just the color of her undies and I wasn't happy about it.

Last week Wednesday, I committed an unspeakable abuse, I'm so ashamed of myself. I Raped my wife and I hate myself since that incident.

Honestly, I don't know what came over me that particular day, I tried to make advances towards her, she refused and she pushed my hand away. Out of anger I slapped her on her face (she bled from her mouth), I overpowered her and forcefully had my way through. She cried all through that night.

I regretted my actions, I feel remorse, I hate my Life . I have begged her seriously to forgive me but she haven't said a word to me for over 5 days now. She cook for just herself and my daughter, she no longer sleep in our matrimonial bed, she would rather sleep in my daughter's room or the visitor's room, she no longer greets me anymore.

I have never abused, beat or raised my hands on my wife or any woman before. Last week was my first time I did such an abominable act in my Life . What If any one notice we're having issues now, how will I explain to them what actually happened?

I don't even want my little daughter to know we're having issues. I don't know who to talk to. It's a faceless forum that's why I'm sharing my pain here . Pls how do I restore back happiness in my home, I need my wife to forgive me. I'm truly sorry from the depth of my heart and I promise it will never happen again.

Please Help Me.