₦airaland Forum

koolpapa: @ Op Tell us the part of Nigeria you come from before we can say if truly benin men like having large family.

2.How many kids do priscribe for your sister if 4 is too large

3 are u married? If yes where is your husband from and how many kids do you have for him.

Tell NL'S these and let see the basics for your post

bamosagie: Good observation but the choice of many children is not limited to Benin men alone, all tribes are guilty. Benin men and women are liberal, they do not have a fixation on marrying from the tribe alone, where the heart chooses that is where we go. Mostly we marry for love.
Funny as it may sound the decision on how many children to have is a joint responsibility of both couple, and the woman have greater say actually.

And I think you will marry a Benin man.

Sincere 9gerian: The ARROGANCE with which some of these northern leaders speak says alot. An arrogance born out of born-to-rule mentality. In the thinking of the likes of Kwankwaso, other parts of the country are populated by lesser humans or people of little or no political value.

chronique: Sweetlemon,sweetest lemonade. Your sister has done well by marrying one of us. Why not follow suit? Marry me and I promise we won't have too many children. Me,I will pity you. . I really can't say cos I'm not bini per say;I'm esan. But I know from way back,it has always been a thing of pride for our men to father many children(since polygamy was almost like a culture to us). It used to be pretty rare to see an indigene who was born and bred in that state,who didn't have more than one wife. Guess the love for kids and a large family plays a major role in that. Most Edo men believe in their names living long after them. Hence,the large army of kids. You can imagine a family like the popular bello-osagie where most of them are doing well. Today,even those who do not belong to that family,but answer Osagie,have some kinda reputation cos most people tend to think they're from that family. All through my time in school,I was always faced with the challenge of telling people I do not belong to a certain Ighodalo family who happens to be a popular chartered accountant from my state. I'm from a large family also and my dad has as much as 15 kids(amongst which are 4 medical doctors/surgeons,1 accountant,1 lawyer,1 pharmacist,2 economists,2 engineers,2 business mgt graduates,etc) You do the maths and imagine how many grandchildren he would have. Eventually,when all his kids succeed and become popular,he would eventually become one of those popular names from the state.

I just think we like to create dynasties.

danio24ng: Binis traditionally were into agriculture hence the large family size which serve as cheap labour for their farms. This trend cannot just die like that but the number of children is reducing by generation. For binis marrying other tribes, it depends, we are very receptive and we tend to believe in what we see and if we are ok with our spouse it is usually accepted most times by our family. Most bini men don't like asking their relatives to look for ladies for them, if they are in the north and finds an hausa lady they are ok with, the family will stand by their decision.

ooseven: Bini Man here..

My parents had 5 of us, my uncle had 3, my brothers have 2 each. I am planning to have 2.

Your generalization is misguided, probably by your environment / where you reside. Remember, all Bini men do not live in Benin-City.

Lastly, all tribes and cultures have certain families that are extremely large for whatever reason.So maybe you should consider changing the title to "Why do some men love large families".

Oba gha to kpere...Iseeee

Fadelex: I am a member of RCCG but I'm highly embarrassed by the school fees of RUN.. the seminarians that brought education to us (CMS, bariga) made it free for all to have access to education. members of these churches (RCCG, LIVING FAITH, CAC, BAPTIST, and so on) contributed their hard earned money to build these schools but couldn't send their wards to the schools. the school is built for the thieving class that bastardized our education sector. RCCG secondary school is paying 600k per term which amounts to 1.8million per annum. for Christ sake, where is d love towards d poor d church is preaching? I think it's high time government started taxing churches. it has become business and how can u be doing business without paying tax? til dis day in developed countries, missionary schools pay less than normal govt schools e.g Barry university in Florida owned by catholic

BoboYekini: Sweetlemon, we feel your pain. But that's where it ends. You rightly mentioned 'love'. That's the magic word and the difference between your experiences and ours.
I'm not big on romance(no thanks to una naija babes), but I get Bob Marley here:
"...we'll share the shelter of my single bed,
we'll share the same roof, while Jah provide our bread
Is this love, is this love that I'm feeling'

chifreke: just 5 weeks old....i have already applied and got interviewed early this year....after 7months of interview i was contacted and am already pregnant.

chifreke: tanks love u are d best...thats my prayer now!

pDude: I thought I said that dear

BoboYekini: I think you've made your point well enough. Now, unless you're a witch from hell who's bent on driving honest people to depression, I suggest you stfu.

pDude: That is if she is too heavy. And no, they won't turn her down. They would place it on hold. And it depends on the industry.

Moreover the OP didn't say she was heavy.

pDude: In Nigeria, yes.

Abroad, it is called discrimination and that is the last thing anyone here wants to be accused of.

Just ask Paula Dean

adconline: Why are Naija youths obsessed with marriage but not obsessed with planing the future of their kids? For every story that ends with " started from the bottom, now we are here story" there are millions that are far far worse from where they started. Have u ever wondered why all these kids are roaming the street come from? why they are beggars? Why they are not in school? Why they are hawking? Why they are naked? I have seen a lot of knuckleheads from primary school days,who were up to no good, never obeyed simple instructions; never did their assignments and homework. They tried their hands on a couple of things and failed, then folks will ask them go and get married.. It's going to be very difficult for their kids to make it.. Mind you that a kid that goes to a run down school is going write the same aptitude test with a kid that goes queen's college.. My point is why settle for less when you could have more.. Children are not supposed to help their parents in their struggle, they are supposed to be taken care of. Everyone is not supposed to be like adenuga or Dangote but we owe it to ur kids to provide them with a better future than we had.

alutacontinua: I don't blame them!
You guys only come here to cite the ones that ended well...stories also abound of women that got dumped for another woman after going through all the sacrifice!

sucess001: But i tot you just advised the menfolk to have drive like adenuga...you contradicting yourself.


and i wanna advise you...am not saying this out of any ill will but for your real sake...marryinga ready made guy is dangerous...


trust me...

sucess001: Just so u knw...adenuga married his wife whilst still driving a taxi in the united states...

nikkyshyne: No forget invite me too oo

fijiano202: you are right but lets be honest,is a job of 150k easy to get in Nigeria,hes 34 already he may not get a well suitable job in 2yrs time and also ladies of nowadays always prefer rushing guys into marriage butwith a job of 150k u need like a 1-2yrs to prepare for marriage,Imagine he gets a job next year,add 2 more yrs he would be 37 already when do u expect him to start a family

alutacontinua: Lol
Congrats
Abeg, pm me when d wedding reach ground.
E fit be when i stroll come Naija, i might branch nd if not, it wouldn't hurt to send my congratulatory messages!

fijiano202: sorry darling u are stewpid,i hate insulting ladies but comparing me to a dog is insultive,is that how u speak to ur bf and brothers at home and later u wonder why u are bin used and dumped,if u continue this attitude am sure my kids we meet ur single azz on nairaland

fijiano202: Darling u are right but u just have to start from somewhere,i know of a friend who planed his life perfectly,he got a job of 170k,girlfriend was on 80k salary so after a year he married his girlfriend but lost his job 4month into the wife pregnancy,after all those planning and stuffs,everything feel apart,we thought it was spiritual and went to like 3 pastors but we were told it was nothing spiritual,sometimes we try to take steps we believe we can cope with but God has his plans

alutacontinua: Yaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!!!!!!!
I'm really happy for you!

Una don buy bed (U can decide nt to answer dt kweshon nd u can just indulge my akproko mind

BoboYekini: Wicked as you sound, I have to somewhat agree with you. Only as far as raising children. Otherwise, I really think that 'two broke azzez' getting married would do both of them a world of good.

alutacontinua: I'm good!

U don marry bed-guy?
I promise not to tell all dose e-badu e-jelosi pipu

fijiano202: you can survive,just dont think abt kids at the moment