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hola

[b]An unlearned boy was deeply in love with a pretty foreign girl, whom he wanted.
But he did not have the courage to talk to her in person. So he decided
to go alone and with the help of a dictionary, he wrote a letter of
proposal to her.

HE WROTE :

Most worthy of your estimation
after a long consideration
and much mediation.
I have a strong indication
to become your relation.
As to my educational qualification,
it is no exaggeration or fabrication
that I have passed my matriculation examination;
no doubt without any hesitation and very little preparation.
What do you say to the solemnisation
of our marriage celebration
according to the glorification of modern civilisation
and with a view to the expansion
of the population of present generation.

On your approbation of the application,
I shall make preparation to improve my situation,
and if such obligation is worthy of consideration
it will be our argumentation of the joy and
exaltation of our joint dissimilation.

Thanking you in anticipation and with devotion,

To remain victim of your fascination.


SHE WROTE :

Dear Mr. Victim of my fascination,

Congratulation for your lengthy narration
of course full of affection aimed at an affiliation
for a combination which on examination
I find is a fine presentation of your ambition.

You have passed your matriculation with little preparation,
what about my graduation after a long botheration,
so improve situation in education
and make an application by acquisition
of post graduation and minimum qualification
for the convocation and before taking your photo for circulation
undergo beautification.

Further strict observation of the following conditions is the
regulation for the determination of our relation.

1. Consultation of my parents before approaching for my connection.

2. Communication of your confirmation that you are not a victim
of any fascination and,

3. Procreation must not be your recreation.

In anticipation of a solid action instead of continuation of
paper conversation.

I Remain,

Unaffected by your affection.[/b]

When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of one thing: either the car is new or the wife.

"What's the matter, you look depressed." "I'm having trouble with my wife." "What happened?" "She said she wasn't going to speak to me for 30 days." But that ought to make you happy." "It did, but today is the last day."

"Darling," whispered a frail little husband from his chair. " I'm very sick, would you please call me a vet?". "A vet? Why do you want a vet and not a medical doctor?" The husband replied. Because I work like a horse,live like a dog, and have to sleep with a silly cow."

hmmmmmmmmmm something dey sele here

[quote author=Efemena_xy link=topic=512551.msg6782176#msg6782176 date=1284918892]<smiles>

a different song? okay girl you're on!!

let's get their temperatures up today!

**Efe listens to the beat of the music, . co-ordinates her moves to jam with the flow. . **

**starts takes the ribbons off her hair and lets the wind blow through**

**takes off her tee-shirt so vicks can see her well tonned tummy**

**does the belly dance moves**

**shakes her booty from left to right in her bikini**

**oh my gawd!! see as my darling's eyes wan pop out!!**

**backs him and vigorously shakes her ikebe while slowly bending down**

yeah man!! [/quote]Abeg take am easy oooo, Body no be wood ooooooooooooo

[size=15pt]********************Baked Beans*************[/size]

One day I met a sweet girl and fell in love. When it became apparent
that we would marry, I made the supreme sacrifice and gave up eating
beans.

Some months later, on my birthday, my car broke down on the way home
from work. Since I lived in the countryside, I called my wife and told
her that I would be late because I had to walk home. On my way, I passed
by a small diner and the odour of baked beans was more than I could
stand.

With miles to walk, I figured that I would walk off any ill effects by
the time I reached home, so I stopped at the dinner and before I knew
it, I had consumed three large orders of baked beans.

All the way home, I made sure that I released all the gas. Upon my
arrival, my wife seemed excited to see me and exclaimed delightedly:
"Darling I have a surprise for dinner tonight." She then blindfolded me
and led me to my chair at the dinner table. I took a seat and just as
she was about to remove my blindfold, the telephone rang. She made me
promise not to touch the blindfold until she returned and went to answer
the call.

The baked beans I had consumed were still affecting me and the pressure
was becoming most unbearable, so while my wife was out of the room I
seized the opportunity, shifted my weight to one leg and let one go. It
was not only loud, but it smelled like a fertilizer truck running over a
skunk in front of a pulpwood mill.

I took my napkin from my lap and fanned the air around me vigorously.
Then, shifting to the other cheek, I ripped off three more. The stink
was worse than stinking cabbage. Keeping my ears carefully tuned to the
conversation in the other room, I went on like this for another few
minutes. The pleasure was indescribable. When eventually the telephone
farewells signaled the end of my freedom, I quickly fanned the air a few
more times with my napkin, placed it on my lap and folded my hands back
on it feeling very relieved and pleased with myself. My face must have
been the picture of innocence when my wife returned, apologizing for
taking so long.

She asked me if I had peeked through the blindfold, and I assured her I
had not. At this point, she removed the blindfold, and twelve dinner
guests seated around the table chorused: "Happy Birthday!"

I nearly died!

happy viewing

^^^tnx

NFF/Super Eagles

*****************Naturist Colony**********************
A man joined a very exclusive nudist colony. On his first day he took
off his clothes and started to wander around the area. A gorgeous
petite blonde walked by, and the man immediately got an erection.
The woman noticed his erection, came over to him and asked,
'did you call for me?'
The man replied, 'No, what do you mean?'
She said, 'You must be new here. Let me explain. It's a rule here that
if you get an erection, it implies you called for me.'
Smiling, she led him to the side of the swimming pool, laid down on a towel,
eagerly pulled him to her and happily let him have his way with her.

Later, the man continued to explore the colony's facilities. He entered
the sauna and as he sat down, he farted. Within seconds a huge, hairy man
lumbered out of the steam room toward him.

'Did you call for me? ' asked the hairy man.
'No, what do you mean?' replied the newcomer.
'You must be new.' answered the hairy man, 'It's a rule that if you fart, it
implies that you called for me.'

The huge man easily spun him around, put him over a bench and had his way
with the newcomer.
The newcomer staggered back to the colony office where he was greeted by
a smiling, naked receptionist, 'May I help you?' she asked.
'Here's my membership card. You can have the key back and you can keep
the $500 membership fee.'
'But[b], Sir,' she replied, 'you've only been here a few hours. You haven't
had a chance to see all our facilities.'
'Listen lady, I'm 68 years old. I only get an erection once a month, but
I fart 15 times a day. I'm outta here.'[/b]

nellaluv:
. . . because i'm a small girl

indeed, small 4 where?

God

wealth

talkative girl or smelly girl?

never found the my mourinho "The Special One"

the cocaine is seriously messing up her head big time

lysaa:
hey sis chan! chu chi chan chan?

lysaaaaaaaaaaaaaa o lysaaaaaaaaaa,
how u dey?

lysaa:
^^thanks sweets.
don't mind that newbie. .a buzzing bee seeking attention.
uhh googles?

yipeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee she's back,
*******sings tonight's gonna be a good good night

spikedcylinder:
Manliness sucking is pretty easer na. As long as you use a proper vacuum cleaner and you adjust the settings. You'll give the suckee the suck of his life!

[center]Escaped convict[/center]
A man escapes from a prison where he's been locked up for 15 years.
He breaks into a house to look for money and guns. Inside, he finds a young
couple in bed. He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair.

While tying the homeowner's wife to the bed, the convict gets on top of her,
kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom.

While he's in there, the husband whispers over to his wife, 'Listen, this
Guy is an escaped convict. Look at his clothes! He's probably spent a lot of
time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your
neck. If he wants sex, don't resist, don't complain, do whatever he tells
you. Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is obviously
very dangerous. If he gets angry, he'll kill us both. Be strong,
honey. I love you!'

His wife responds, 'He wasn't kissing my neck. He was whispering in my ear.
He told me that he's gay, thinks you're cute, and asked if we had any
Vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong. I love you, too.

^^^ its just another name for public holiday

nellaluv:
Awww, tee_jay, that's so sweet of you

tnx,

librangyps:
Y do i feel like tee j is also lysaa. Peopl wil do anytin 4 attention

and who are you?

who is onlin here?

she was probably drugged, sad

me dey fine ooo, its been a while all is well?

me sef don arrival

tnx

lysaa:
VERY INGENIOUS OF U TEE_JAY.

IT'S LOVELY.

wooooooooooooow it worked she's back,

and GONE AGAIN