₦airaland Forum

HONESTFACT101:
#FREELADIES

Nonsense has taken over the streets of nairaland......signing out

Please, do well to deactivate your account.

Don't thank me,
You are welcome.

She was outscum by a "scummer"

Thread of dating Nigerian women

Day 1:

Girl - How did you get my number?

“We met at that event. You were with Gina and you gave me your number”

Girl - I gave plenty people my number that day. What were you wearing?

Day 2:

(WhatsApp message)
Guy - Hi
**1 day later**
Girl - hey
Guy - Good morning
Girl - Mrng.
Guy - How are you?
Girl - blue tick. No reply

Day 5:

Girl - hi
**guy is surprised**
Guy - hi
Girl - hw are u?
Guy - I’m fine. How are you?
Girl - Not fine
Guy - why?
Girl - Can you send me N500 airtime? I’m in a tight corner.

Day 9:
(My guy is bored and wants to try again)

Guy - Hi
**3 hours later**
Girl - Hello dear. Tnx 4 the other day.
Guy - you’re welcome. Where do you stay?
Girl - Lugbe n u?
Guy - Gwarinpa
Girl - K

Day 10:

Guy - hi
Girl - hello dear
Guy - Can we hang out sometime?
Girl - where?
Guy - anywhere you want
Girl - ok, Junkyard
Guy - Ok.
Girl - Can I come with 3 of my friends?

Day 14:

(Date is set)
Guy - hi. Are you still coming?
Girl - yes I’m getting dressed. I will meet you there.

**I hour later**
Girl - please can you help me book Uber, my app is not opening

Just say you don’t have transport FFS �

Day 15:

Guy: Yesterday was nice. I can’t wait to see you again.
Girl - ���
Guy - when will that be?
Girl - Don’t know

(How will she know when she’s arranging other dates with men?)

Day 25:

(Guy posts picture of him and a female friend chilling on status)

Girl - hmmm
Guy - what?
Girl - nothing. Your babe is fine.
(this is how they ask if you’re single)
Guy - she’s just a friend.
Girl - hmmm ok

Day 33:

(Girl has not heard from guy in a while)

Girl - Hi dear
Guy - hello.
Girl - long time. How have you been?
Guy - I’m fine. You?
Girl - you forgot me nau. Can we hangout again?
Guy- ok. Will you come to my house?
Girl - I can’t come to your house.

Day 42:

(Guy finally wants to ask girl out after 6 weeks talking stage)

Guy - Do you have anyone you are emotionally involved with?
Girl - why do you ask?
Guy - I want to be that person if you don’t have.
Girl - Can you take care of my needs?

(What fvcking needs? Are you a special needs person FFS??)

Guy - I believe that we can take care of each other. This isn’t a fling for me. I want to have something special and permanent with you.
Girl - hmmmmm
Guy - Please be my girlfriend
Girl - Let me think about it.

(Basically when they say they want to think about it, they have agreed. But Pride)

Day 47:

(5 days after guy and girl officially start dating)

Girl - hey baby
Guy - hi dear.
Girl - can you do me a small Favour?
Guy - anything for my girl. What is it?
Girl - I want to change my phone screen.

Day 58:

(11 days after guy changes phone screen, phone screen breaks again)

Girl - baby, my phone screen broke again.
Guy - we just fixed it. You have to be careful
Girl - I’m even tired of using the phone. My mates are using iPhone 11. I want one.
Guy - ok. How much do you have let me support?
Girl - N32k

Day 65:

(Guy finally buys iPhone 11 for girl)

Girl - Thanks baby. I love the phone.
Guy - You’re welcome, my love. I love you.
Girl - I love you too.
(After a round of sex)
Girl - baby what are you getting me for my birthday next week?

Day 71:
(1 day after Girl’s birthday)

Girl - baby, thank you for the cake and the dinner yesterday.
Guy - You’re welcome.
Girl - but you didn’t buy me a birthday gift
Guy - I got you an iPhone 11 last week.
Girl - it’s not a birthday gift. You are too greedy. My ex bought me a birthday gift.
Guy - How am I greedy? I got you an iPhone 11, a birthday cake and paid for a dinner for you and your friends.
Girl - so you’re counting everything you’ve done for me.
Guy - that’s not the point.
Girl - I want a break from this relationship


Day 85:

(Relationship on break. Guy misses girl and wants to make it up to her so he shows up at her place unannounced and sees another guy wearing boxer in girl’s house. Other guy introduces himself as her boyfriend and says girl went to the market. Guy walks back into his car and cries like a baby. Then calls girl on phone)

Guy - hello, babe. I came to your house and I met some guy who says he’s your boyfriend. So this is what you’ve been doing to me? Because we had a small misunderstanding. You’re cheating on me.
Girl - I’m sorry but you pushed me to him. You stopped caring about me.
Guy - How did I push you to him?
Girl - You took a break from me
Guy - babe, you asked for the break
Girl - so if I asked you to put your hand inside fire, you will put your hand.
Guy - babe, you were upset and asked for a break and I respected your request. Should I have fought you?
Girl - If you loved me, you would have fought for me.
Guy - It’s fine. I guess this relationship is over. I wish you the best.
Girl - Don’t call my number again
Guy - It’s fine. I won’t. I’m just disappointed that after everything I’ve done for you, you can treat me this way.
Girl - what did you do for me?
(This is a trap to get you to list things that you did so she can say you always list things that you did)
Guy - really? So I did nothing?
Girl - is it IPhone you want to call? I can buy it for myself

Day 105:

(Girl has broken up with new guy, is now missing guy. Actually, her eye don clear. Picks up phone)
Girl - hello, babe it’s me.
Guy - hi dear. How have you been? So happy to hear from you.
Girl - I’m fine. How are you? Just wanted to check on you. Long time.
Guy - you’ve done well. I’m fine �
Girl- I miss you ☹️
Guy - I miss you too.
Girl - Can we have a sit down and talk? I can come to the house.
Guy - Oh let’s meet somewhere else. My wife is at home.
Girl - wait. You’re married? So all these while you’ve been deceiving me while you had another woman you wanted to marry?
Guy - no, I actually met her one day after our break up (day 86) and in 15 days (day 101) we got married. I didn’t cheat on you or deceive you.
Girl - It’s not possible. You lied to me.
Guy - babe, you’re the one I caught cheating
Girl - So are you saying I wasn’t good enough for you in 85 days but she was good enough in 15 days?
Guy - Well, she was more ready to settle down.
Girl - So what do you want from me? Why are you talking to me?
Guy - You’re the one who called me oh.
Girl - (hangs up, deletes and blocks guys number and social media everywhere)

Day 106:

Girl is now a feminist (misandrist), posts on Facebook; Shouting "men are scum"

Vacancy exists for DELIVERY ASSOCIATES (Despatch Riders) for a logistics company based in Yaba.
The rider is expected to have at least 1 year experience in despatch/delivery business have a riders card and at least 4 credits at SSCE or OND from a recognized institution.
Pay is NGN600,000 annual pay aside other perks. expected to be staying around Lagos Island, Yaba, Ikeja, Surulere
Candidate should be able to read and write well, courteous and smart. Qualified candidates only should forward their CV with their picture on it to teomisakin@gmail..com with email subject “DELIVERY ASSOCIATE”
Thank you.

Perhaps, just to save your silly face

Don't ask me jor...
Ask those who wanna marry, or already married.

I am not getting married.

Lol, are you surprise?

Why do you think the owner of this noble forum doesn't wanna get an "app" for nairaland??!

If truly you wanna enjoy peace of mind in your relationship; just place your gal on a monthly stipend of 45k, or above.

If, and when you cannot afford it, borrow!
If you know stealing is your "thing", then steal, you must!

Just do everything to please her!
Worship her!

If, and when she does cheat, let go!

Israel6767:
This must be a joke....
Place girlfriend on monthly stipend?
Steal?
Always opt for single mothers?

Shaa it's not everybody that has sense before...

I am not to be blamed if sarcasm, and witticisms ain't your forte.

Op, forgive her; this is what real men do.
She is just a shild.
Talk to her heartily.
Always try to please her, and place her on a monthly stipend of 45k, or above.

Op, you are not a real man!
You are a weakling for trying to dodge your responsibility.

A real man will place his gal on a monthly stipend of 45k, and above.
Even, if you don't have money; borrow!
If you know you won't feel guilty for stealing, then, steal!

A real man must try to please his gal.
A real man always opt for single mothers.

Don't thank me,
You are welcome.

Feminazis will win, of course.
They will beat the hell outta weak men

What is marriage when the bed is defiled; yes, am referring to you both!

Both of you should get out!

obembet:
A girl who help you to become somebody today?

This.

If you dont have any value to add to my life, why would i even be with you, in the first place?

Chaii chelsea fans no go allow person hear word again bayiiii

Kudducini:
If Bayern Munich no win this match make my yansh clap

Oya, bring that your nyash here

Lalasticlala, update now

Continue dating both of them.
Especially the one impacting something meaningful, as you've said.

Don't break up with any one of them!
Play your cards right, play the game.

People still date?

They see relationships as poverty allievation scheme

Can you blame them?

Dump her ass off and, go for some else jor

Storm ko, thunder ni

Yeah, sure.
That's one of the best ways to commit suicide.

Tonight will be united turn to open the book of lamentation 4 vs 61.

Martinez39s, will be our pastor.

Downchelsea, where art thou?

Rhodaogunpeju:
Believe this story at your peril

Everyone knows its fiction, madam.

OlayemiAshraf:
Bruh you need redpills ..

He needs sense more

phodoraz:
A time will come when you will want more. Enjoy this phase

More of what?
Do you meant more of sex? Please, learn how to be more specific.

Don't thank me.

obinna58:
We all need women bro. I can never be proud of single status but what can I say, Nigeria girls are difficult to handle. I'll prefer to keep hunting success for now

I think these are your own opinion, which you are entitled too. But then, learn to use the "i" in place of "WE".
It will help you alot.

Don't thank me.

The money you are giving her is not enough
Place her on a monthly stipend of 45k or more, and she will never cheat on you!

If you dont have much, you can go ahead to borrow, or better still, if you know you won't feel guilty stealing, then steal to make her happy.

Always pray for her and support her.
She needs you now than ever before.