₦airaland Forum

djeezy: I am a lawyer and I must say I found it very amusing ipso facto. Although it lacked archaic and latin words which would have made it imcommodious for hoi polloi to comprehend. The ab ovo was good, the dated facet of it. NICE, I love it.

Are you in any way related to honorable Patrick Obahiagbon?

'I am in love with you' is a starter phrase,no doubt it points in one direction,towards the opposite sex you can have an intimate relationship and spend a lifetime with but its for the starters..more like telling the other party to give you a chance.
'I love you' encompasses all , it's is a continuous process.yes,there are different types of love but the context it's used in explains the type of love..You can tell your wife of 2years you love her but telling her you're in love with her is like going back in time .
In short,'I'm in love' is the foundation while I love you is the structure,bricks,decking etc .'I love you'can also act as a foundation
More than anything else action is very vital,act the words more than you speak it.

apocalypse: And yes how can I forget my S.O.P ( Songs of praise ) , my favourite hymnal back then was

All things bright and beautiful
all creatures great and small
all things wise and wonderful
the Lord God made them all

He gave us eyes to see them
and lips that we might tell
how great is God all mighty
who has made all things well




Can't remember the verses in between

omg! This brings nostalgic memories of my childhood(primary school)..what primary school did you attend?

london2lasgidi: aye, will be rite bac..
thread is boring for now..
i wanna go drop some knowledge in another section...

hey you!you are yet to respond to my mail..I've got my answer though just want to hear it from the horse's mouth.

austushi1: ^^^^^ where u see her bweast?

curious as hell too

freecocoa: Add most gentle to the awards and y'all know that will be mine

I should be nominated for the most gentle if there's an award for that..Freecoacoa!you ..I laff in spanish

Caracta: HBD. How old are you today? And what's your shoe size?

..what do you want to do with his shoe size? or you want to calculate his age..
Seun is 30yrs today!

[quote author=Ileke-IdI]Getting job offer in NIgeria? How do I go about doing that?
It's like looking for a needle in a haystack lol[/quote]Not as difficult as you think,my brother got his Nigerian job offer when he was in the UK ..I think he applied online, luckily for him,the interview was conducted in Britain and bingo!he passed and was offered a job..the job came with some incentives too..his things were shipped back home at the expense of the company,not sure bout ticket fare back home but yea..it's possible,very possible to get an offer. Just create an attractive CV first and having lived abroad might give you an edge over your Nigerian counterparts.

OMG! This is scary..so it's compulsory that one serves irrespective of their age as long as he/she is taking up a public post.It's not fair though,if 30 is the age limit,then it should be for everyone irrespective of where they lived or schooled.

I hate NYSC and would really love not to do it.

Happy birthday to the CEO of nairaland.have fun .

freecocoa: 23 already?thought he is 18 o.


HBD.

You are wicked o .. I actually thought he's 21 too

Never ask for a woman's age(unless it's official)..that's about the most obvious
op, An author has come up with a list of 10 top dating tips to guide men on what they should never say to women.

David DeAngelo, author of "Double Your Dating", says there is nothing worse than making mistakes that will later be regretted and one way to avoid them is to remember the following, Bullz-Eye.com reported.



First of all , a man should never ask a woman if he can kiss her, as she will only say, a man should never "ask" for a kiss.

Asking her for a kiss will only make a man look like a boy, which is what a woman is not interested in, and even if she says "yes", it could mean she is just being polite, while on the inside her attraction meter will read a firm, "No".

Secondly , a man should never ask a woman if he can take her out on a date sometime, as she would like to be with a man who is a leader and in control, not someone who asks her permission to hit on her.

A man should confidently ask a woman out, by simply saying, "We should hang out... what's your number?" or tell her about a specific place he wants to take her to.

Thirdly , a man should never brag about the car he has or the kind of house he lives in, as it would seem like he is trying hard to impress her.

Women would be far more impressed by a man's material possessions if he does not mention them in conversation.

The fourth thing a man should never ask a woman is what she wants to do for the night, as she likes a "man with a plan".

The man needs to have a game plan before he calls her, so as to ensure that she will not be burdened with having to think about what to do.

Fifthly, a man should never ask a woman if she likes him, as this is one phrase that turns off a woman completely.

He should just assume that she likes him, and never ask the question, as it would look like he has no confidence.

The sixth tip is that a man should never ask a woman why she never answered his message, as one, it would show that he cared she did not reply back, and two, it would give her a guilt trip, which is seen as insecurity by women.



The seventh tip is that a man should never ask a woman how men she has slept with, as this shows that he is suffering from insecurity.

The eighth tip is that a man should never hint at a future date with a woman he has just met, as she not only wants but needs a guy who is somewhat of a "challenge", and will lose interest if she senses she has won.

The ninth tip is that a man should never end a phone conversation with a woman with a "next step", as firstly it would kill any spontaneity by being predictable, and secondly he would kill any chances of her calling him.

The tenth tip is that a man should never talk bad about a woman's guy friends especially if he hasn't met them and doesn't know her very well, as this is the fastest way for her to mark him as "insecure"
http://articles.timesofindia.indiatimes.com/2012-06-30/man-woman/29829800_1_woman-tip-insecurity .

[quote author=MacDaddy01]https://www.latrobefinancialmanagement.com/Pictures/Not_This_Bullshit_Again.jpg

This story is a hoax and senseless;


http://www.snopes.com/religion/einstein.asp[/quote/]



It might be a hoax and senseless to you ,it isnt to others ..and the story isn't all bout Einstein..even if the guy wasn't Einstein,atleast he proved a point which I bet is too strong for your shallow mind to comprehend and that explains why you quickly dismissed it as a hoax.

At the 1997 World Women's Conference the first speaker, from England , stood up: "At last year's conference we spoke about being more assertive with our husbands. Well, after the conference I went home and told my husband that I would no longer cook for him and that he would have to do it himself. After the first day I saw nothing. After the second day I saw nothing. But after the third day I saw that he had cooked a wonderful roast lamb." The crowd cheered.

The second speaker, from America , stood up: "After last year's conference I went home and told my husband that I would no longer do his laundry and that he would have to do it himself. After the first day I saw nothing. After the second day I saw nothing. But after the third day I saw that he had done not only his own washing but my washing as well." The crowd cheered.

The third speaker, from Nigeria , stood up:After last year conference I go house and tell my husband that I no go do im cooking, cleaning or go market for am again, and dat he go dey do am imsef. After the first day i no see anytin. the second day sef, I see notin.

But after the third day, as the swelling begin go down, I start to see small small from my left eye.

An atheist professor of philosophy speaks to his class on the problem science has with God, The Almighty.

He asks one of his new students to stand and.....

Professor : You are a Muslim/Christian, aren't you?

Student : Yes, sir.


Prof : So you believe in God?

Student : Absolutely, sir.

Prof : Is God good?

Student : Sure.

Prof : Is God all-powerful?

Student : Yes.

Prof : My brother died of cancer even though he prayed to God to heal him. Most of us would attempt to help others who are ill. But God didn't. How is this God good then? Hmm?

(Student is silent.)

Prof : You can't answer, can you? Let's start a gain, young fella. Is God good?

Student :Yes.

Prof : Is Satan good?

Student : No.

Prof : Where does Satan come from?

Student : From...God...

Prof : That's right. Tell me son, is there evil in this world?

Student : Yes.

Prof : Evil is everywhere, isn't it? And God did make everything. Correct?

Student : Yes.

Prof : So who created evil?

(Student does not answer.)

Prof : Is there sickness? Immorality? Hatred? Ugliness? All these terrible things exist in the world, don't they?

Student :Yes, sir.

Prof: So, who created them?

(Student has no answer.)

Prof : Science says you have 5 senses you use to identify and observe the
world around you. Tell me, son...Have you ever seen God?

Student : No, sir.

Prof : Tell us if you have ever heard your God?

Student : No , sir.

Prof : Have you ever felt your God, tasted your God, smelt your God? Have you ever had any sensory perception of God for that matter?

Student : No, sir. I'm afraid I haven't.

Prof : Yet you still believe in Him?

Student : Yes.

Prof : According to empirical, testable, demonstrable protocol, science says your GOD doesn't exist. What do you say to that, son?

Student : Nothing. I only have my faith.

Prof : Yes. Faith. And that is the problem science has.

Student : Professor, is there such a thing as heat?

Prof : Yes.

Student : And is there such a thing as cold?

Prof : Yes.

Student : No sir. There isn't.

(The lecture theatre becomes very quiet with this turn of events.)

Student : Sir, you can have lots of heat, even more heat, superheat, mega heat, white heat, a little heat or no heat. But we don't have anything called cold. We can hit 458 degrees below zero which is no heat, but we can't go any further after that. There is no such thing as cold. Cold is only a word we use to describe the absence of heat. We cannot measure cold. Heat is energy. Cold is not the opposite of heat, sir, just the absence of it.

(There is pin-drop silence in the lecture theatre.)

Student : What about darkness, Professor? Is there such a thing as darkness?

Prof : Yes. What is night if there isn't darkness?

Student : You're wrong again, sir. Darkness is the absence of something. You can have low light, normal light, bright light, flashing light....But if you have no light constantly, you have nothing and it's called darkness, isn't it? In reality, darkness isn't. If it were you would be able to make darkness darker, wouldn't you?

Prof : So what is the point you are making, young man?

Student : Sir, my point is your philosophical premise is flawed.

Prof : Flawed? Can you explain how?

Student : Sir, you are working on the premise of duality. You argue there is life and then there is death, a good God and a bad God. You are viewing the concept of God as something finite,
something we can measure. Sir, science can't even explain a thought. It uses electricity and
magnetism, but has never seen, much less fully understood either one. To view death as the opposite of life is to be ignorant of the fact that death cannot exist as a substantive thing. Death is not the opposite of life: just the absence of it. Now tell me, Professor. Do you teach your students that they evolved from a monkey?

Prof : If you are referring to the natural evolutionary process, yes, of course, I do.

Student : Have you ever observed evolution with your own eyes, sir?

(The Professor shakes his head with a smile, beginning to realize where the argument is going.)

Student : Since no one has ever observed the process of evolution at work and cannot even prove that this process is an on-going endeavour, are you not teaching your opinion, sir? Are you not a scientist but a preacher?

(The class is in uproar.)

Student : Is there anyone in the class who has ever seen the Professor's brain?

(The class breaks out into laughter.)

Student : Is there anyone here who has ever heard the Professor's brain, felt it, touched or smelt it?.....No one appears to have done so. So, according to the established rules of empirical, testable, demonstrable protocol, science says that you have no brain, sir. With all due respect, sir, how do we then trust your lectures, sir?

(The room is silent. The professor stares at the student, his face unfathomable.)

Prof : I guess you'll have to take them on faith, son.

Student : That is it sir.. The link between man & God is FAITH. That is all that keeps things moving & alive.

I nominate me ..sometimes ago ,about 5yrs to be precise..was bored at home so decided to try MTN entertainment whatever. I selected the joke option.A min later,I got an alert,checked my inbox to find the driest joke in the history of jokes..what's the joke you ask;an illiterate boy went for a competion,he was asked "what's the name of your father?" to which he replied "baba" "and your mother?"he replied "mama". that was the joke ..to add insult to injury Stupid MTN deducted N50 from my account for the silly joke .Moral to the story..some jokes on here are just like the MTN joke and the posters are claiming to be joke presidents ..nominate right ,nominate tinkybabe as JOKES PRESIDENT/PRESIDENTRESS ..

This is wishing one of the greatest nollywood actors a happy birthday.. long life and prosperity.

Naija o,first it was Beyonce falling in love with Dbanj,now Ramsey and Janet Jackson ..maybe the next would be "Michelle Obama in a sizzling relationship with president Goodluck Jonathan".I hail my people !

Lol..memories.You didn't add 'after round 1,original panadol extra,won tune gbe de'

I guess it's because some have scanty eyebrows(men are lucky to have full brows) which are weirdly shaped .

Never knew idleness is an offence punishable under the law..

To some extent like some people pointed out but other influences like peer group,exposure,educational level can reinforce or undermine it
I personally have learnt to study the behavioral pattern of a person(ofcourse know a bit about their background)and try to see correlations between them and where they are from,good and bad.One thing I wouldn't do is judge a person by their background unless it's medically based or there is a generational curse in the family.

It is difficult to tell who is lying here. Saying RMD spoke out in defence because the claim is true, without having a substantial evidence to back it up is not a good judgement,could be or not .He could be applying the popular strategy "the best form of defence is attack" Lol.
COnsidering the fact that the norm among politicians is stealing of public funds,one cannot outrightly blame RMD for being defensive as the claim could tarnish his image knowing that we Nigerians are usually quick to believe every claim without questioning its authenticity especially when silence is taken to mean consent.On the other hand,he could be trying to debunk the claim to appear innocent,when indeed the building is worth that amount and he actually stole from the treasury to erect it. All in all I think it's high time Linda started minding her business.

lol @the traffic.
@op ..Amen..though the topic is quite misleading..my heart skipped a beat when I saw it.

Your prayer won't work..I will go to church *hurriedly grabs her hand bag *


Viewing this topic: fresh_dude(m), joeydozzy(m), michelin89(f), Mrs.Chima(f), rokiatu(f), Shollypopz(f), Ogidi-Olu(m), Caracta(f), Dondav(m), IZUKWU(m), firestar(f), sexkillz(m), shaneroberts26, Kslib, pleep(m), Odunnu(f), Tinkybabe(f), london2lasgidi(m) and 9 guest(s)
una no dey go church??devil pikins

btw my vote goes to oxone,london to lasgidi_{holla @ur girl in Manchester},Jimmy4x(cute boi),_{don't fail your exam tho},freshdude and Dammytex.Ikeking ,you aint bad too ..you're leading in your group nways.

OMG!I'm already late for church..(thinking of the excuse I'm going to give the technical director..)*kneels and pray_"Father forgive me if I tell a lie in church"

Ammyng: even though some of them has Satin Fur kind of head shape, not all bad

I know..but trust me I'm gonna be the hottest (she)boy when I UPLOAD.btw why didn't you contest for the female version..you are a beauty

ghen ghen..nairaland guys aint bad o.. eerrrmm can I nominate myself..I look like a boy a bit ..A cute ,fine, handsome boy..would upload in a min

My face ,they go 'wow!you're so cute' ..Would have been a good compliment except that they reduce my age by 5 years