₦airaland Forum

lefulefu:
Wow ingenius! ..UDUJ,Lalas247 u will love this.

Lefu this is just lovely

There is something about the innocence of kids that always strikes me.

The wedding was awesome. Breaking century old barriers

donstan18:
Ask yourself why I stopped arguing/debating with her on this thread

I am presently asking myself that same question. I am out of here bro. Have a great weekend

mhisbliss:
To be honest i didn't read that, i only picked where you mentioned religion, my point is not solely based on religion as well, may be you didn't read it before coming to argue, they're alot of lenghty articles discrediting this copied article you posted too, but I'm not about to do that, may be I'll counter your points when you summarize what you copied and posted

I think your response is insulting. I don't copy articles and take the time explain my thought process.

It's responses like yours that pushes me far far away from Nairaland. I think I will contribute less in future. Thanks anyway.

mhisbliss:
I came across a thread where a guy claimed he discovered his sister is a lesbian, some of the comments on that thread got me annoyed and amused, most of the comments were "She's born that way, its natural" i know that this comment is influenced by the western world but we're not like them, we have norms, culture and a way of life, and we're supposed to be who we are.

Theres no evidence anywhere to prove that homosexuality is natural, it cannot be genetically or biologically defined, theres no gene responsible for homosexuality, and nothing about the human anatomy suggests homosexuality is natural, if you examine the male and female sex organ you'd know that it is designed to complement each other, and to reproduce, both needs to work together, therefore by design, we're supposed to be heterosexual not homosexual,

Our culture frowns at it, it is clearly unafrican, abnormal and every religion frowns at it, including christianity
Romans 1:26–27 follows this same reasoning. Paul says that men abandoned the natural sexual function of women and engaged in unnatural sex with men. His words make it clear that homosexual behavior is unnatural because it is a rejection of God’s design for sex. Homosexual desire, then, would also be unnatural for the same reason: it drives people to abandon the natural design and function of human sexuality.

No one is born gay, its a psychological and societal problem and it needs to be curtailed as soon as it is discovered.

Lalasticlala

I am a Scientist, so I bring my arguments from Science and not religion.Science says there are no such thing as absolutely “hetero” or “homo” sexual people.

All of us are only juggling between our dominant traits. Are you socially identify as straight? That means you are more than 50% heterosexual and less than 50% homosexual.

Were we always born this way?
Yes and No.

I know it is not popular, but people only pick inconvenient truths that suits their agenda. Only political people will provide absolute “yes” or “no” answer to give stronger argument to their cause.

Our hormones and the development of our brains determine how we will end up throughout our life. This leads to some early homophobes to experiment with hormonal therapy to “cure homosexuality”, which only damages their “patient” further. Some people are simply born with certain condition that leads them to have homosexual preference, which may change over time. Some are the otherwise, started as straight guy, and then suddenly “come out” as gay during later years.

While doing my Masters I had a Dutch classmate who was convinced that he was straight, he turned out later to be gay. He had dated so many girls, but couldn’t settle on one, until he found his man. I asked him if he was too shy or facing any social pressure to hide his sexuality? He just said simply said no, and he said that he was just confused. I asked him, if he knew that there are many gay people already, would it make him feel better? He just said no, he simply changed after puberty, that’s all. So yeah, they were not always born to be straight either.

Now, for political purpose, if you say “yes”, think again. Some questions also asked for example like why there are not so many people born to be gay, is it just because of deviation in our genetics that affects small number of people or what? The answer will pretty much hurt anyone’s self-esteem. So, please go back to real science. Some people are indeed born that way and stayed consistent throughout their whole life, some people simply don’t, and they change.

The gene that makes some people to be born with a lack of melanin that causes their skin to appear pinkish (people love to call it “white”) is also recessive too, and less than 25% of the world population are born with it. Yet, some of them are immensely proud of it and push the idea that they are actually superior.

I think this shouldn’t be about whether you are born with it or not.
The real question is, why bother? It is everyone’s own personal life, not mine or yours.

We should punish sexual offenders, but not one’s sexual orientation. I honestly can’t think why people are still bothered by this. There are people out there doing things like trafficking humans, making snuff films, enslaving other humans, committing animal cruelty, destroying pristine environment, and so on, which should bother us.

Cases like sodomy in prison between male inmates, despite being not gay shows that our sexuality orientation is actually very fluid and compromising.

Identity politics has grouped us into these three sexual orientations (Gay, Straight or Bi) and made us villify each other. It has no basis whatsoever on real scientific findings.

ReinaFarine:
1. Uduj
2. Greiboy
3. Lefulefu

Those are the top three impartial romancelanders I've noticed. They call it like it is without resorting to insults or trolling... And Lefulefu popcorn is just ��

Thanks dear. I love reading your posts a lot. Always insightful

RuthDaniels:
Uduj,Greiboy and Lefulefu

Others are antagonists, their myopic advises leads to hell

Thanks dear. I've missed chatting with my queen

How have you been? TGIF

CAPSLOCKED:

I AGREE WITH YOU.
WE SHOULDN'T ATTEMPT TO FIX VIOLENCE WITH MORE VIOLENCE.

BUT WOULD YOU HAVE MADE THIS SAME STATEMENT IF THE CASE IS REVERSED, AND A WOMAN IS THE VICTIM?

WOULD YOU NOT COME HERE TO CRY FOUL AND SCREEM GENDER ABUSE, AND AGITATE FOR A POSSIBLE DEATH PENALTY FOR THE MAN?

HYPOCRISY WILL TAKE YOU NO WHERE.

So true bro. So true

balaclava:
This setting called church denomination is silently becoming a CULT

Members no longer have free will.

Even God gave us free will. Nothing is by force with God.

Church denomination is gradually becoming a problem rather than a blessing.

That was how one G.O said if u don't pay tithe you won't make heaven. Full stop!

I will get crucified for saying this, but majority of these so called churches are cults masked as places of worship.

Places where they worship their pastors instead of worshipping God.

Brainwashed church members

#ENDTIMECHURCHES

#ENDTIMEPASTORS

CAPSLOCKED:


WHAT ARE WE APPRECIATING THEM FOR, INSTEAD OF APPRECIATING ALL WOMEN EQUALLY?
WHAT IS THEIR ACHIEVEMENTS OR CONTRIBUTIONS TO THE ECONOMY, OR IS HAVING A BIGGER DERRIERE THE MOST IMPORTANT FACTOR IN THE WORLD?


WE GIVE WOMEN THE IMPRESSION THAT THESE ARE THE ONLY THINGS WE LIVE FOR.

I'M OUT OF HERE.

CAPSY, ever too serious

Sometimes you just have to let loose and have some fun. Life is too short bro

DonPiiko:
Saw this interesting hash tag on twitter and thought to share here.
#Bigbumbumtwitter

Lefulefu I think it's time we crown DonPiiko as the Brigade Commander Ukwu Nation, he has made us proud

donstan18:
I need to be honest with you Mr man.

Your agreement with him was to SERVE him and getting settled after seven years. This is part of the service you are to render.

There's a thing line between serving an OGA and learning skills from an OGA.

You pay to learn skills, while you get paid to serve. Any mistake you make now out of anger will have your years of services with him wasted.

Nothing comes easy, even in universities, you don't just learn from lecturers, you work for them in some cases so long as you are aiming a particular goal.


Be guided Bruv, keep enduring, it's not easy to stay with a married uncle, not atall. But some goals worth the stress.

It could be a trap or a planned game to mess you up, don't fall for it.

It's your right to leave, but it'll be your loss.

After 7 years, and he refuses to settle you, you can then freely use them for rituals. God will understand.

The boldfaced, this dude you always crack me up

Let me know whenever you're in Lagos bro. Madman

RuthDaniels:

Hello Ruthie , missed you lots

How have you been?

obonujoker:
Guys who decided to be faithful, how do you cope??
What keeps you glued to your partner without cheating on her??

I use myself as an example... I have been in a relationship with my girl for over 3 years now, without cheating on her for once... Although I have had a lot of advances even from her so called friends...

And sometimes the urge comes to have sex with another woman, buh I remember her, and don't even start a conversation, not that only even some married women too, buh I have been able to withstand, coz we are planning to get married by the end of the year...

So faithful guys, how has it been without looking outside..??
As it been worth it??

Faithful ladies can input too...

Unfaithful people.... don't spoil us here o...

It can be very difficult to stay faithful. There's so much temptation out there. But I believe the most important way to ensure you stay faithful is first be willing to stay faithful, then decide to stay faithful. There's really no rule book. It is an individual decision to make which requires so much will power. When you make this decision then you have to create your ways of deflecting or overcoming temptations. It is something that requires you make some serious decisions about, including being really hard on yourself, there's also the risk of expressing this hardness, though in a subtle way, towards others especially the opposite sex. When this is practised for sometime it becomes a part of you, but the beginning can be difficult, then there are periods of weakness when you have to remind yourself to stay faithful.

In the end its really about YOU. You decide to stay faithful. The sort of things that keep me going is knowledge that I do not admire cheats because their lives are generally not worthy of admiration or emulation. I had 2 friends who cheat on their spouses. I admired them because they are fellow successful work colleagues but this cheating part totally upturned my respect for them, and if I don't respect you enough there's no reason to waste time with you. One divorced his wife because he wasn't willing to stop cheating and this influenced his negative attitude towards his wife. The other chases girls like flies chase shit, it became embarrassing to me, I don't know if his wife knows, but I just backed off.

So much time and effort goes into cheating.

All in all, cheating complicates your life. You may agree that it is better to stay sane. This should encourage you.

Archangel15:
This is not a minor error oga a person who does not know the meaning of 'rape' at this age is a disaster

Her's was a spelling mistake. Her brain just went off before posting.

Language fluency is context dependent.

We can all pretend to be proficient by using English on social media such as facebook or nairaland where communication doesn’t happen in real time, where I can craftily disguise my lack of fluency with dictionary usage and with taking some time to put my thoughts into words.

CAPSLOCKED:

UDUJ, YOUR SISTER.

My pretty Edo sister is just raping the full state vigorously

That notwithstanding English is not our first language, so her minor errors could have been forgiven easily, it just became superfluous as she tried looking trendy when she should have just gone vernacular

mhisbliss:
I thought you'd get angry and buy nairaland or biuld your own or join another forum, @bolded you can't do without NL, thats the reason why it'll be here for that 19yrs

I understand why you got emotional, its a gay thing Serve your jail term in peace abeg

I never knew you were this SAVAGE

You just got a new admirer

.

YOUNGELDER1:
Prison loading..

Nah, not prison. Their time is up.

They will be shot at the back of the police station. That's what criminals get these days and theirs is more serious as they killed a DPO.

[quote author= post=67760491]For you asking thia question alone, you are obviously in the friend's zone bro![/quote]

Tallesty1:
If it feels like a friend zone then it is obviously a friendzone

swiz123:
You are strongly held in the mumu zone.

This one has passed friendzone and mumuzone.

The op is obviously in the BROTHERZONE. The guy has turned into a blood relation

ShyCypher:
Serious liability.

Any 30+ Nigerian woman is expired.

No remedy.

IamD18:
Suicide na remedy

DonPiiko:
Konjivities wan kill your man

How konjivities go wan kill a whole DonPiiko

The Don that always has a bevy of pretty damsels at his beck and call

Gcpc:
Hi all,

I'm a single mum to a 2.5 yo girl and I'm about to turn 39.
My baby's father is out of the picture. He bailed on me while pregnant and only came back after 2 years and me taking him to court.
Now he wants to "take things where we left them" but my understanding and gut feeling is he just wants free passes with me.

I made so many mistakes with my dating life that I find myself in this horrible position of being a single mother about to hit the big 4.

I have a great job, a career, enough money to be comfortable, a wonderful child, family and friends but I still feel lonely and depressed at times.
I neve envisioned this life for myself and never imagined never marrying.

I've been working on myself, working out, finding new hobbies, building up my self confidence but I don't know how in the world I would or could find a man.

Is there any chance someone like me could find a decent man to share my life with ?

The more you age the more you notice that your age group has settled down, are getting married and popping out babies.

It's a strange feeling. Almost like finding out that people that you went to school with have passed away somehow years ago. No one ever mentions these things or how uncomfortably lonely these sudden feelings are.

Not that it's the very same. It's quite overwhelming to find yourself realizing how far out of the social bubble you are with your age group and knowing for sure how most of them are married. Feeling that somehow you've lost your chance of ever finding someone.

The wonderful thing about today is that we live in an age that allows us to gather into focused groups. We will never be 100% alone as long as we search. Thank the internet gods.

If you feel a bit hopeless looking in your local area there are always online dating sites. Some even have apps for your phone.

I don't recommend online dating very much as it's difficult to find people who aren't just looking for a one night stand. But it's still absolutely possible to sift through that and find the right person.

If it's love that you're looking for try to avoid places like badoo, instachat and the likes, those are for kids and the likes. Some apps are notorious for booty calls (hook ups) and should probably be avoided if that's your goal. Or maybe you'll find love while having fun? Anything can happen.

40 doesn't mean a steadily but surely upcoming end to ever finding love. It just means you'll need to seek resources to help you out and that's okay! It will surprise you to learn how many other people in that age group are also seeking those resources.

The option to find love should never dwindle away no matter your age. Don't forget that and never give up hope. Be honest, patient and persistent in your search and you'll find it yet.

You're not alone. Good luck finding love and hopefully happiness.

makydebbie:
Lol, not a feminist tho but feminism has nothing to do with Man-hating and other shiit.



Feminism was supposed to be about granting women power and equality in the society that won't restrict how high they rise or grow into the world in fulfillment of their purpose or dreams, and then about harnessing that power for positive change. Younger generations of women today have largely turned away from these and are hiding under the umbrella of feminism for their selfish and myopic reasons and desires. Especially the radical feminists who have forgotten that women empowerment does not mean pulling men back. It means walking together.


Our younger generation have made it seem men are the enemy. Hence, turning the concept of feminism to gender war. It was not supposed to be so.

To read more, click on the link in my signature.

Lucid, brilliant and succinct

Real feminism is very rare. A real feminist is someone who truly cares about equality and improving the interactions between men and women. They care about real world issues, such as oppression.

Fake feminists are more common. The feminist movement has, in lots of ways, become corrupt. The cornerstone of fake feminism is exaggerating a victim complex. It’s more about superiority and control than equality. This fact is evident when these fake feminists turn on other women who disagree with them.

There have been feminists who have criticized other women for choosing to be stay at home moms. These feminists told the other women they were only making that choice because of their ignorance. The "you are wrong if you disagree with me" mentality is part of what the original feminist movement wanted to eliminate.

Sadly, the fake feminists out number the true feminists. And, they are hurting women more than men. Radical feminists have shifted the attention away from real world issues and onto things that don't matter.

Also, by making issues out of non-issues, the public at large is not going to take them serious anymore.

CAPSLOCKED:

TRUE STUFF.

My bro, it's been a long time. Always good to see you around

Truer words have never been said bro.

The trials we go through as men

Some of us spend over 70% of our income taken care of others, sometimes you ask yourself if you are working for them or yourself.

It's a Rat Race bro, Rat Race

Hanseel1:
Your kind of wisdom and intelligence amazes me.

May you continue to grow in wisdom as you move through the phases of life.

God bless you bro

I wish you a happy sunday

Hanseel1:
You didn't talk about the main topic .

Why are people especially women against polygamy when nobody is against hypergamy?

Men are polygamous by nature and you should also know that hypergamy isn't limited to one gender.

“Men’s instincts tend toward polygamy, women’s toward hypergamy. Hypergamy, for those who don’t know, is women’s congenital inclination to continually trade up in men. The word has Greek origins (hyper meaning ‘above’ and gamos meaning ‘marriage’) and originally referred to women’s tendency to “marry up”, but applies equally to non-matrimonial relationships.

Whereas all men have a natural urge to copulate with a great variety of fertile women (because, in our evolutionary history, such behavior improved our chances of gene proliferation), women have a corresponding biological drive to have relations with the highest quality man they possible can (for the same reason) and to gain exclusive commitment from that man.

Briefly put, men want a lot of women, women want one really great guy.

Men and women’s respective sexual interests are therefore perpetually at odds, and the competition is zero sum in nature; for one sexual strategy to succeed, the other must be thwarted. If women are to fulfill their reproductive goal of getting exclusive commitment from a man, the man cannot simultaneously fulfill his reproductive objective of impregnating a harem and vice versa.

Which of the two strategies prevails has varied throughout history. During certain periods and in certain areas, men were free to indulge their polygamous nature, as indeed they still are in certain contemporary societies.

In the current industrialized world, however, female reproductive interests benefit the most. Polygamy is frowned upon and monogamy is strongly encouraged, while hypergamy is not discouraged.

Women are thus at liberty to fulfill their natural biological imperatives at the expense of men.

The truth is a man wanting to marry multiple women has been on for ages but is presently been frowned upon as being uncivilized. At the same time a woman wanting to look up her class for a potential mate is kind of accepted in various societies and sadly no laws can stop this.

I believe that sums up your question in a literal sense.

Happy Birthday. May your dreams and wishes come true as you turn older. Cheers

Love and trust are two different things. Yes, you can love someone without trusting them. Likewise, you can trust someone without loving them.

The problem is that it’s very difficult to maintain a loving relationship with someone you don’t trust, let alone for that relationship to be either healthy or happy.

The notion of loving someone we don't trust may seem odd or contradictory, but none the less, I believe it is definitely possible, and unfortunately way too common. To help put this possibility in perspective, let me ask you some simple questions to serve as an analogy.

Can you feed someone, and make sure thy eat without trusting them?
Can you take someone to the doctor and see that they are cared for and medically well and healthy without trusting them?
Can you love and care for a wounded pet or animal that you don't trust and fear may bite you?

If you answered yes to all three questions then you probably get it.

My point is, we can do things like this (above) with and for each other as well if we choose, out of pure love for a person or creature, regardless of whether we trust them or not.

So the simple part of my point, and this post, is that it's possible to love someone you don't trust.

The complex part is that it is this very ability, or tendency, to love without trust, that complicates and prolongs unhealthy relationships. That is where the possibility lends itself to a potentially problematic cycle.
Why is it that we are unable to fully love someone inside a relationship with someone we don't fully trust?

The problem with being able to love without trust is this: we get in relationships with people because we love them (not a problem), BUT, we also STAY in the relationship because we love them, even AFTER we stop trusting them (problem). That is not healthy.

None of us are as “liberated” and “enlightened” as we might think. In unrealized sexual encounters, it’s usually the woman who says no. Women being much pickier than men is hardwired into the feminine psyche. Why? Because a sexual encounter for men can potentially be nothing more than a few minutes of pleasure.

For women—at least prior to birth control and easy abortion—a sexual encounter can potentially be very costly. It can lead to nine months of pregnancy, nursing, followed by total care for a child until at least age eighteen. And since women tend to be physically weaker than men, unprotected women tend to be easy prey for unscrupulous men.

So, women are hypergamous in ways men tend not to be. A woman’s deepest instincts tell her to look for a man who can and will not only provide for their children, but who can protect his family.

Bottom line: The world is the oyster of older men who are wealthy, powerful, and charismatic. Similarly, the world is the oyster of younger women who are attractive, attractive, and attractive.

IamPlato:
...


For Highqueen I Understand Her Own...


But For Biacan/Thegeneralqueen i Dont know



And Of Cause... Lefulefu abeg Wetin This Name Mean


UDUJ answer Sef


Ladyhippolyta88 why Did You Choose This Name?

my moniker is actually the first 3 letters of my middle name and the first letter of my surname combined