In my opinion cooking for ones boyfriend shouldn't be an issue if everyone acted and thought the way they are supposed to. Familiarity does breed contempt!

I personally enjoy cooking and hosting people. While in school I cooked for my guy and girlfriends on a weekly basis ( cleaning and cooking was my own way of distressing ) so cooking for my boo wouldn't bother me. In fact it would take a conscious effort for me to try not to cook ( which in my opinion would be a purposeful act of meanness )

I don't see it as a moral issue as I see sex. I do the cooking thing but knowing what I know today I wouldn't do it if I didn't enjoy it. Let me also add I don't expect a monthly allowance from my boo but if I did, it would only be reasonable to be a blessing as well and be useful.

Gone but not forgotten.Following this as well.Did I hear well or my ears are failing me " A Nigerian girl actually recited the whole JFK inauguration speech while her father wept because of his death Awwww it was nice to hear that.

It's quite unfortunate what has become of the US government today... If I didn't know better I would think someone let the kids out before recess. Even kids get tired of playing games and to an extent understand the word stop. Anyhows' it is well.

Hillsong united all the way
There's something about Israel Houghton's Alpha and Omega- that does it for me !
I agree its really not the song but the anointing on the person singing the song...
There's absolutely nothing that feels better than true worship ( not noise making o)- jeez I can't describe what it does inside of me...

Nice one

Hmm its kind of true

nuru3000: @pheforusty, i dnt want to mistake a gals friendliness for green light so i just keep to myself.

Smart !

byvan: If you were an idiotic husband as a rich man,why won't your wife insult the the melanin off your skin when being broke is added to being idiotic. Like I always say,the few good men don't whine about women, why ? Because they are treated the way they deserve.


A good man is a good man,thus he deserves utmost respect,add money to him,the world will worship him.When the only part of a man that makes sense is his pocket,of what use is his empty evil self without his pocket?


All am saying is that men should treat their wives right when the money is there(treating right doesn't mean drowning her in naira notes ) so she can humbly stand by you when you are broke.Most women use these broke times to launch their revenge on their horrible husbands.


There are exceptions though,some women can only worship money,a man of dignity means nothing to them.

You nailed it !!!!

mekaboy: I never knew the woman could talk, all she did then was serve chicken and red wine and smile. Till things got tough. Then I realized the power of money.

Lol- singing money money money money money!!! It's a joy to submit to ones husband especially if the man is worthy of the crown. Husband having more money wouldn't make me more humble- in fact I would relax and bask in the blessings o shu house wife things mehn. If the money is equal submission remains the same but of course I would be on my toes as well trying to be the support should in case. If he has less- lol submission wouldn't and shouldn't change. Although it might be an uphill task but it could be done it has been done and it should be done.

Hmm- wondering why I'm just reading this. Lesson in every story- got to love Nairaland <3

I have also pondered on this question. From my experience being entirely open has not been the best- some people( esecially the guys) just lack the understanding and cannot process things adequately.I have found out and observed that saying that which is necessarily works. Guys are not complicated beings anyways- so basic information is good enough I would suppose.

Be open with things that affect the both of you but apply wisdom to other things especially if it has to do with the in laws. I like to look at it as not keeping secrets ( you could let it out if push comes to shove) but as saying what is necessary and needed.

Lol- I was scheming through the video again (wouldnt sit through it)truth is being spoken but by a broken means. I can smell sincerity and a show from a distance. Pardon me but again this is another show. Lol at underdeveloped organs in a full term child- seriously Get your facts together Stella and then give it to your colleague to present so gbo? Smh

Iranu o bosi. As far as I'm concerned the show of emotions or what not is all an act- another expression of talent. What is wrong is wrong! Start fixing up your screwed up self before pointing fingers at others.

In my opinion You don't have a say in this issue- at least not for me to listen. That you would come out and open your mouth on moral issues pertaining to marriage disgusts me- whatever happened to lying low and putting an effort into thinking straight and retracing your steps

duduspace: A lot of ignorance being spewed on here and it shows most people do not really have true love in their lives.

1. You don't need to have children to be happy or else all the impotent and barren people would be swimming in the atlantic.
2. Its got to do with probabilities and not set in stone that two people with AS genotypes will give birth to SS offsprings.
3. The medical profession advances daily and new treatments are being developed.
4. There are other genetic defects in individuals that might not be immediately apparent and is not testable like Genotypes but with the potential to be even more debilitating. Who knows if that AA person yu're going to marry carries such a defective gene? 

Atimes in trying to solve one problem, we human beings create even greater problems, it is sad to see what most people are advocating here, it might not actually even be in the best interest of humanity to eradicate the sickle cell mutation and I think it is totally wrong  to rule out a future with someone you're compatible with in a lot of other ways solely on the basis of a manageable health condition, and yes I know an SS person who lived to 55, can anyone remind me what life expectancy is in Nigeria?

Yes, those who marry under these circumstances have potentially heavy burdens to carry and shouldn't go into it lightly only to chicken out later but this blanket ban while sounding reasonable is way off the mark.

My thoughts almost precisely. I'm certainly not for it neither am I against it- the koko of the oro is know thyself and understand what your getting yourself into. I also like that you remind people that completely healthy individuals have kids with genetic disorders.


Calling those things that be not as though they were !

X-factoria:
@ Poster:

First and foremost, the AS/AS chances of having SS is unfortunately overrated. It is as everyone knows, a 25% chance but unfortunately, people talk about it as if it is the most likely probability of 75%.

My advice to anyone about to make a decision in an AS/AS relationship is to seek God's direction. If God is in it, believe me, you will never come by any SS child. God's ways are not our ways. The people involved should pray and if possible enjoin other spirit-filled friends/pastors to pray with them for direction.

My sister in-law and her husband are both AS and they have three kids: 2 AS and one AA and they never had any CVS nor abortion. In fact, the man has always thought he is AA until he took the test in his own laboratory only to find out that he is AS after 2 children.

If I were in this situation and the lady has everything I want and the only problem is that we are both AS, I will take the risk and hope for the best. Marriage is not all about children.

Enough said!!! I like the seeking Gods direction n if God is in it part

Oga o- I don old o. WTH!!!

Very risky. Increased risk of giving birth to babies with genetic or chromosomal disorders. Not advisable !

Cholls: Well my selling point is
I always know when I Naija babes wants me

How is that a selling point Your self confidence would have been a better answer to the question.

k2039: One of the qualities is that She is not perfect, she is a real woman, not an ideal one.

I LOVE this !!!

Goldenboy007: Definitely it is not for everybody, in fact that's one aspect of our culture we need to be enlightened on. The End justifies the means, Marriage should be a "means" and should not be the "End". Happiness is the "End", you marry to get happiness not sacrifice happiness to get marriage !!! Same thing with having kids too !!! Your life is the most important, if living single have given you all the joy you need don't go and submit yourself to any bondage because of what people would say !!!

<3<3<3

Hmm please let me know how this ends. Thanks in advance.

3

Thankful

Efemena_xy:

Stories like these make the MrBrownJays and their attitudes to pregnant women look acceptable.

@OP, why should you be having mild to heavy arguments with your spouse frequently? Sounds like you instigate them. Please explain 'heavy arguments'. Do you get violent? Throw things around? Do you have a sharp, caustic tongue that's quick to insult the hell out of the man??

You're pregnant. The least you can do is respect yourself and keep your mouth shut. Why must you have an argument with your husband? Pls don't give the excuse of being hormonal this and hormonal that! Aren't you aware of the complications that can arise from having a high bp, which can be induced from unnecessary arguments?

I'm sorry to say this, but your husband sounds like the more mature one here. Rather than entangle himself with a battle of words, he chooses to walk out of the situation till things cool down. Or what do you expect him to do? Sit down quietly while you heap insult upon insult upon his head? Do you even know what might happen if he snaps?

Or maybe, you really are one of those who has a fetish for violence and only feel loved if your husband plummets the living daylights out of you.

Sorry, but from what you've posted, I support your husband 100%. You on the other hand haven't learnt your lesson. If sitting down to discuss amicably, and keeping your mouth shut while he airs his grievances is too much for you to bear, then don't blame him the day he walks out on you for good... straight into the arms of a more accommodating missus.

Oh, and I need to ask this of you: Didn't you guys date at all before getting hitched? Didn't you study the man before tying the knot and saying "I do"?

What the hell. Did you actually say these words Trying hard to understand where your coming from but I must admit it makes me sick to my stomach so I give up trying. Knowing people like you exist creeps the hell out of me. I wouldn't say too much because your way of reasoning did not happen overnight. There is simply no justification for this mans actions its pure madness !!! God help us .

Walking away to cool off is different from abandoning your family. The former is the smart thing to do while the other is madness. Kai

Hmm element of truth however not the solution

Thank you Jesus ...through you we have overcome!

uniqueval: You are lucky. Some gals wld wish to be in your shoes...

You lie my dear, you lie !!!

Seriously What in the world!!! It annoys the crap out of me when I see these men carrying guns always in the ready' position. You would think with all of that the country would be safe- na wash" Nonsense and ingredients

I had to think about this one.

1) God fearing
2) Hardworking
3) Money
4) Physical attraction and chemistry
5) Education (I value education a lot; however there are a bunch of broke unemployed educated guys. Being resourceful is more like it.
6) Gentleman ( this is also important to me but I figured if a man fears God his attitude and mannerism would be line with whomever he fears)

Based on your description of no 4 how is that an issue

Hmm- I'm sure this hurts the two parties involved. Lesson learned- never bow to pressure. Act because you chose to so you can deal adequately with the consequences of your actions.

Food for thought

Thankful