₦airaland Forum

CyberEBOLA:
AS THE DRAMA SEEMS TO TURN OUT
1. A depressed person is in desperate need of money.
2. He was willing to do anything to make the money.
3. He then planned to dupe people with suicide.
4. So, he created new accounts to aid his plan.
5. He then went to post on a high traffic thread with his old account.
6. Luckily for him he had been shouting depression long ago, so many people believed his story.[color=#000099][/color]
7. Unfortunately for him, not all Nairalanders think with their hearts only, but BRAIN too.


In summary, it seems the scammer is a financially depressed person willing to do anything to make the money..

"Lucky for him he has been shouting depression",


Guy u don't know what you are talking about. U have every right to think the way you do, but do not discourage other people who are emphatic enough to attempt at helping the young man.

What sort of luck is that? You're just surprise people are capable of being angels. We all are, even you.

t. But you see they all are selfish. APC chairman is the one today ,saying PDP is buried.. One day the ll change. Selfish people

gaskiyamagana:
[size=8pt][/size]
Get it right. That is what Atiku said about PDP when he is not in good terms with the party, not during or after 2019 elections.

. Get what right? Has any of the two contributed to governance as it relates to world development? So why take any as standard and final when cross carpeting is a recurrent thing in our politics.

Saying "PDP is a dead party "" is tantamount to calling millions of Nigerians that thumbprinted either stupid or dead. People who are under his directt leadership in aso rock think of the president as not competent enough. Didn't his VP also lose his ward?! Truth is all this are rhetorics and shouldn't make their way into any tribunal of repute..

Of all the ongoings, what catches my erection, sorry my attention is how the lady goes from behavioural trappings of a sane, decent and moral living and dressing patterns to shading her unclothedness. Selling yourself by yourself on top of a stranger' car. What an irony and a mockery!!!!! I don't ngive strangers my number...until she sees me in my friend' ride. Odê

david22uu:
If u are pained.. wail by urself.. no wonder people like u play partisan politics... im not a looser or a non visionary like u... look for who to argue with u.... non progressive entity

Partisan politics? I think u haven't been observing your actions enough. Funny u mentioned the word ' loser' . Does that have bearing on anything being talked about? By the way
, a visionary is known by their intellectual remarks. Just out of curiosity, when u say ' I' m not a looser ....like u'. What exactly do you mean?...

BabaO2:
Because you voted for a thief, must every Nigerian vote a thief? Please change your stupid way of thinking. How can Atiku that cannot deliver his poling unit win a presidential election in Nigeria. what an insult and very awkward way of thinking

. What is this one blabbing about. So we HV a saint managing the country.

david22uu:
this may sound like the cry of a looser, but thats the truth...

empty brain..the statement is valid. Buhari' " I expect him to go to court" also valid. Buh only a blind supporter will make such a cry baby excuse remark. Otherwise atiku might have cried his opposition supporters to remain at home during the presidential election. Think before commenting next time. Question is, was there a low turn out or not??!!!

[quote author=Kenshinmunac post=76446095]Mehn I wish I knew wouldn't have been involved with her. She is fucking proud but letting her go is so heart shattering because I got attached. Thanks for the advice though bro, [/quote

So you think guys have the monopoly of being attached cos you don't get/ unable to take a stroll in her head and find her most guarded secrets. Guy be a man and move on. If she seemed to be doing fine without you, u can double the 'fine' and save every bleeping thought of her for something as productive as learning to play physical or online chess assuming u don't know how.

Do not advertise what you don't mean to sell..

People shall become lover of themselves "

Shortyy:
Dear Lord, not again. Can we all just move on already.

People shall become lover of themselves "

I st

Hehehe yes , I know there isn't a manual on how we should behave. We aren't some toys or gadgets that require one... i am going to assume the guy is ashamed of himself.



On the path of assumption...After being ashamed... He should totally send me his number. I really need to congratulate him for choosing shame after the fact and not before, since shame isn't in the coal digger's dictionary.

Really? So No one is going to ask him what he is dying to tell us..? You guys are wicked. Anyways, so bruv WHO ARE YOU that makes it socially excusable for wearing slippers to a mall? We learn everyday..

When victor whatever is other name is, mirage a clause from the LORD'S BOOK, these are the answers he didn't know he was looking for..

Not sure

GOFRONT:
Wat!!!

Because he wants to drive Benz by fire by force??

Or because if he no make money, wetin he com this world to gain??

See wetin Victor AD don cause with his music..

I often wonder how that song is inspirational to people..that song is low key demonic... It may have been composed and sung with good intentions.. but that's where it ends. Evil took over when he cut out the Bible phrase and challenged an immortal Truth. But when you mix it with emotion and struggle tales plus "nice" beats, the unwise will easy be lost and carried away to anything danceable.

xavieree:
firstly, I m nt against your topic ....it's interesting and cool datz why I clicked on the topic in the first place.
Secondly, I hv seen this particular answer on quora and I even gave an upvote.....I came in xpecting a personal answer/experience I can somehow relate to and mayb even motivate me to put mine down and not someone else's experience and then lastly I jus stated a fact (cos I didnt really get defensive front u put up callin someone immature n all dat )..I wasnt trying to be judge-y or condescending

.... Oh! Sorry if I came across as defensive... what you may have missed , is that your response gave me an avenue to write about these issues, though indirectly related. I quoted you but went off the curve with my reply. I guess that has been bottled up and was just looking for any escape.Anyway I was just pointing out that many people on the Nairaland platform have great stories anyone can easily be grateful for as well as learn from but due to the uncultured way some people go about reacting or commenting leave much to be desired. I think I have an example from this very topic.

The first sentence from the writer was to pre-informed the would be reader on the long read if he or she eventually decided to read the piece. Trust our "DNA" to repeat the obvious in the comment section. In your case , I understood you perfectly and you were right about the forum being Quora. And having read it before, understandably you prefer something different and hope for that to be within our Clime for a change. Again even when you thought I was being defensive, you didn't react (why can't people here be that way!). Thank you for that.

xavieree:
the story is from quora....u didnt tell us something personal

No I didn't. Nonetheless, It is someone's personal story that anyone can and should learn from.

It's unfortunate that there are so many immature minds on Nairaland that any topic raised finds away to attract this set of people. Leaving people seeking solutions worse off. You would be surprised the type of comments, a topic like 'how do I stop watching porn?' would attract. And even Nairaland admins bring to front page, all sorts. To them, as far as it's trending ; it's front page worthy. If they are not to be socially responsible and disciplinary , it will just be better that the platform is restricted to political discourse. Anyway I don't see that happening. It's all about traffic, conversions and 'how much am I making'. But I do think there should be a 'dislike' icon... to indicate we have sensible and right thinking Nigerians within any topical issue.

Anonymous

Updated Aug 2

The Hell I was forced to live in for nearly two years.

This is a long story, but I feel it has secrets that I must tell.

For the first half of my teenaged years, my life was privileged and I was ignorantly blissful. From the ages 13–16, all was well and lovely.

I was beautiful. Enviable smooth skin, long blonde hair, hazel eyes. I was tall and tanned and slender and my parents were wealthy and I had everything I thought I could want.

I went on dates when I turned 15 every Friday night. I'd go bowling with my friends. We'd go ice skating and shopping and we'd laugh in the streets and everyone would look at us. We wore pretty clothes and had perfect makeup, and we all were identical in our looks. I thought this was what I had to offer. Beauty. The ability to make others jealous.

This all changed when I turned 16.

My step-father was having an affair. He left myself, my brother, and my uneducated, ignorant mother quickly and effortlessly. He never looked back.

My mother was forced to move us two hours away from our private school. My step-father stopped paying for it, so my brother and I had to go to a public school. My friends stopped talking to me.

We lived in a low budget area. My mother found work as a maid, but it wasn't enough.

One day, I came home from school, and 80% of my clothing was gone. My old makeup was missing too.

I asked my mother where it was. She told me she sold it to one of her clients, and she left her makeup bag at a bus stop, so she took mine.

My mother only cared about how she looked. As did I. She taught me to. She didn't care about anything else, other than her looks.

My face began to break out horribly. I got acne everywhere.

I went to school in cheap shorts and t-shirts everyday, with a shitty book bag. Boys didn't look at me anymore. I was horrified. Everything changed. It felt like I was living in a different world. My hair got dry and brittle, from all the days I straightened and curled it. I had no products to fix it.

I got scarily skinny. My curves were gone.

Who was I without my beauty, I wondered. I didn't know.

Now, I'm sure I know what you're thinking: the vapid rich girl who turned into the ugly poor one got what she deserved. And you're right. I was proud and arrogant and spoiled. I did get what I deserved.

But this is only the beginning of the story. I told you it was a long one.

By the time I was 17, I accepted my pimples, and my crap hair, and the loss of my beauty. I learned that I actually had a personality.

As I began to gain back a slight bit of confidence, my mother lost all of hers.

She stopped working. She said it made her look bad to work as a maid for rich people, in houses that used to look like our own.

We got evicted, and became homeless.

My biological father lived in Scotland. He couldn't help us, and at the time, I doubted that he'd want to.

My brother got a job as a dishwasher in a restaurant. He's the one that truly suffered it all. He was a good person. Popular at our old school for all the right reasons. He was kind and intelligent, talented. Handsome. While my mother and I were both terrible people, he was an amazing one.

He barely made anything working. We slept under freeway underpasses. A far cry from where we used to live.

Men bothered me constantly.

Some wanted sex, others yelled at me, calling me pizza face and telling me to buy a mask.

I was assaulted on a number of occasions.

I cried everyday. I felt so sorry for myself. So embarrassed. I had Polaroids of my old boyfriends and I, of my old "friends" and I. I was stunning, and still, that's all I could think about - my loss of beauty.

I forgot about my personality for a while.

We still went to school. Everyone knew we were homeless. It was a moderately small town.

The owner of the restaurant my brother worked at allowed us to stay in his backhouse that was infested with roaches, among other things.

There was only cold water, and no electricity.

I learned to steal food.

This was in a smallish town in Georgia. Stealing didn't go unnoticed, and I got caught, though the police took pity on me and gave me a warning, referring me to a shelter.

My mother was a shell of who she once was. She would talk to herself and hallucinate. She would hit me and scream. When my brother tried to stop her, she would threaten him and say he was abusing her. She'd curse at us and tell us terrible things. This went on for months.

One day, she disappeared. The owner of the restaurant told us that some old man picked her up in a shitty car and drove off down the road.

My brother and I thought she would come back.

She never did.

Years later, we found arrest records of her online. She'd been arrested for heroin possession in Las Vegas, among other things.

I was 18. My brother was 16, when she left.

I graduated high school. I didn't attend the ceremony, I just picked up my diploma from the office and left.

I got a job at the grocery store near the house. The manager felt sorry for me.

I decided to try to get in touch with my father. I hadn't seen or spoken to him since I was 10, but I knew I needed to get out of Georgia.

My brother took a high school equivalency exam and passed.

I found him, and got in touch with him. I told him our story. He was horrified and told me he wished I would've called him sooner. He instantly bought my brother and I plane tickets to Edinburgh. The owner of the restaurant, out of the kindness of his heart, helped us get passports within a week. It was expensive, but he did it for us.

We took nothing with us. There was nothing worth taking.

When we touched down in Edinburgh, I felt hope, for the first time in two years. I no longer looked in mirrors, or admired myself. My vanity was gone.

My father met us at the airport.

When he saw us, his jaw dropped. The main reason, he told us, he hadn't kept in touch was because of my mother. It made sense, but he clearly felt terribly for leaving us with her and our step-dad.

We looked homeless. He stuck out like sore thumbs as we journeyed into Edinburgh.

People gawked at us. We knew we looked terrible, but we didn't care. I didn't care.

My father bought us new clothes. I chose cheap shorts and jeans and t-shirts and hoodies.

I was humbled.

He offered to buy me makeup and jewelry and pretty things.

I accepted his gifts, but never asked him to buy me anything like that.

My acne went away.

I maintained my hair well. I gained weight, losing my skeletal frame.

My father enrolled us both in university in Edinburgh.

I was anti-social. I'd forgotten how to be charming and sweet, I suppose because it was all fake back before everything had happened.

A boy came up to me and asked me what my name was. I couldn't even maintain eye contact with him, but he kept trying to talk to me. I couldn't to figure out why.

A few days after he initially approached me, I looked at myself in a mirror in one of the bathrooms at my university. For the first time in what seemed like forever.

I was….beautiful.

But in a different way.

Outwardly, I was beautiful.

But I could sense my strength when I met my own eyes in that mirror. I could see my humbleness, my courage, my power. I had depth. I had inner beauty. I saw what that was for the very first time. I saw who I was, and who I could be. I saw myself, fleshed out and raw and real, for the first time in my life.

I wasn't beautiful before at all. I was cruel and vapid and selfish and undeserving of my privelaged life of luxury and artificiality.

Now, I knew how lucky I was. I was in school. I had a home. I had my father who loved me, and my brother.

I walked out of the bathroom with tears in my eyes. And when that boy tried talking to me again, I looked him right in his eye and never looked away from anyone again.

I graduated university. Ten and a half years later, I'm 32 and I'm married to a wonderful Englishman whose eyes I never looked away from again.

And though he knows I had a "difficult" past, I've never shared this with him. I never have shared with him my step-dad abandoning us, our homelessness, the assaults I endured, the abuse, the pain, the anger, the sadness.

It still haunts me to this day.

I sometimes wonder what it would be like if my step-dad never left.

I would still be that ignorantly blissful beautiful girl with no substance.

I wouldn't know true struggle.

I wouldn't know true pain.

In a way, I'm almost glad this happened to me. It has made me appreciate life and what it has to offer. It has made me strong and humble.

I know I need to share this with my husband.

I suppose I'm afraid.

Not to tell him, because I know he'll be understanding.

I'm afraid to say it aloud.

I've never voiced it before.

I'm afraid that I'll look in the mirror and see that broken, pimply sad girl once I talk about her. It makes her real. I see her in shop windows sometimes, in rear view mirrors, and she scares me. I'm always afraid she'll return one day.

But she also reminds me of who I was, and who I've become.

Who I'm more afraid of is that beautiful girl, though. She scares me the most, and she's the most difficult to face.

I'm going to try to real this entire story aloud.

Maybe it'll help me tell him.

I don't know.

But what I do know is that this secret is my best kept and my worst kept one.

Best, because I never tell anyone.

Worst, because I never tell anyone.

A double edged sword.

Live goes on.

So it goes. You have to roll with the punches to appreciate the time-outs. You have to live in darkness to appreciate the light.

And how I do appreciate that light.

Edit:

Wow. I am truly stunned at the outpouring of love and support from everyone, I almost regret going anonymous! Thank you to you all, you've truly made me more confident in my story, and you've made me feel better about telling my husband the whole truth.

A few people have been asking about my brother, and the restaurant owner who helped us get to Scotland.

Shortly after my brother graduated college, he got hooked on cocaine. He spent so much time harboring the sadness of our past…he turned to cocaine to get him through the pain. It was especially heart wrenching because of how good a person my brother is. He suffered from severe anxiety and PTSD from what happened to us. He suffered more than I ever did. I watched him go through this and it made me feel even worse about the entire situation.

Even though we were in a better place, he still couldn't sleep or rest. He'd stay awake for hours and hours and hours. He couldn't make peace with the past. He relived it every single day.

Finally, my father and I took him to a mental health center after he accidentally fell asleep and woke up screaming. We didn't know about the severity of his drug use until after he was checked in to the center; we thought he only used marijuana.

He got better, and clean. He's strong. Today, he still has terrible anxiety, however he's learned to manage his PTSD, and he no longer uses drugs. He's been with his girlfriend for three years now, and she really helps him pull through.

He's better, but still broken. I think I was lucky to not be entirely scarred by the past. It's there, but I can manage it. He can't, and it's saddening to watch him wallow away right in front of me. He has panic attacks from going to the grocery store. He can't sit still. He's a far cry from the confident, popular guy he once was, but he's still an amazing person who overcomes so much everyday.

Him and his girlfriend are living in Ireland now, in town called Killarney. The reason I'm telling you the name is so you can look it up for yourself. It's truly a magical, beautiful place, and the only place I've ever seen him happy since all those years ago, before everything happened. He's content.

As for the owner, he died a few years ago. I found his daughter on Facebook and made contact with her in hopes of connecting with him again to tell him where Kent and I ended up. She informed me that she now runs the restaurant, and her father passed due to a heart attack. It was extremely saddening when we found this out; we never really got the opportunity to thank him, but he's an angel, nonetheless.

Anyway, I hope this provides some closure for everyone wondering where the others in this story are now.

Thank you again for taking the time to read this. I appreciate it so much.

Emilia
221.1k Views · View Upvoters ·

dingbang:
You date someone for their personality not just where they come from. If you think we date you ladies for your monies then you are [i][/i] GREATLY MISTAKEN, intact if you need cash, come let me spoil you silly with money.

WTF r you spewing? You trying to attempt to try repair our international image or the local one??!! Or are you reading or lifting from a textbook? Isn't our Constitution written in a book. Isn't the Bible a book? Are you loving all your neighbors. Don't you know how common is it that a mechanical engineer always use the services of a mechanic for both simple and complicated things in Nigeria? Was he ever opportune to be part of a research team? Or need I mention that you don't have to know how to analyze Simple DC or AC circuits to conduct deliverance session on Power Sector to cater for190 million of Nigerians!!!!! All you have to do is get your law degree ,grow along that career path and jump into any management course and jump out and that my lost friend is a requisite to hold 'sensitive' positions in Nigeria even though people like you are in the thousands but why call it sensitive in the first place.
Even the most sensitive of all no longer requires a Certificate..., Show ur Nepa bill and you are good. However though , the system is very faithful in little things... Federal ,state and private placement; you must not be more than 28 year by Dec 1, you must possess 10 to 15 working experience, no flat toe...et cetera.

RUBBISH

Does the title 'Prof. Dash Dash, Department of Electrical Electronic Engineering' still mean anything?...
Politrics I hail thee...


95% of dating is not about personality, at least anywhere in the world that reeks of third degree poverty and hunger. ( GREATLY MISTAKEN?? abaaa!)


Mind you I am not a mind reader to tell what the boy is after... If the young lag has got friends , it's only a matter of time before they reprogram him stereotypically.

What's something that sucks about being a man?



Anonymous
Anonymous
Answered Oct 16 · Upvoted by Farhan Usmani, former Trainee at HCL Technologies (2017-2018)
I'll pen down this incident that happened in 2011 when I was a manager.

I was 30, working in a big accounting/audit firm as a manager. I had recently been promoted and was one of 2 females who were a manager or above. In that firm, managers interview the candidates for internship. I was scheduled to interview a boy for a 3 year internship.

The interview went really well. He answered all my questions with ease and perfection. I was happy because I wanted an intern in my team. I mentally made a note to request the HR to allocate this boy to my team. After he left, I glanced at his form where his date of birth was mentioned which clearly told me that he had turned 18 barely a month ago. I raised my concern with the HR, but he was still hired based on his interview performance. (The reason I raised a concern was because he was an undergraduate and was pursuing his graduation, so he would take leaves for his exams every year)

When he joined, I became his reporting manager. But unfortunately, after the induction process was completed, I was on a client location. In my absence, my senior allocated him to one of my listed clients in South India. The client location was in a remote village where we had to stay in okayish guest houses.

Everything was going well. This young boy turned out to be a wonderful prodigy. He would do tasks that third year interns couldn't do. He would handle a lot by himself. He was every manager's delight.

Six months later I had to submit the year end review. I was adamant on giving him a perfect 5 score but the HR weren't in agreement. After back and forth I managed to get a 4 for him and that month's exceptional performance award.

He was also very silent, full of innocence. He didn't consume alcohol, was a vegetarian, didn't smoke, wouldn't gossip, wouldn't take any personal calls during work, would carry college books on outstation assignments, would have a glass of milk daily like a small baby, would speak only when necessary, was brutally honest (once I reached office really late, so when he was leaving I asked him to stay, he said he came on time unlike me). For me, he was like a son. I had kind of adopted him. He was child like naughty sometimes. (Once on an outstation assignment we returned late after celebrating a team member's birthday, he scared everyone by switching off the lights and making ghostly noises. Once he drew a beard on my office ID card. Once he hid the key to my room because I cooked for my team and it was horrible)

Fast forward to next year. It was a big assignment. Annual year end. During such assignments we hire help from our KPO for small tasks. For this assignment (it was 2 months long) I got this fresh graduate girl. They both were on the same location and this girl got attracted to him. (He is exceptionally good looking, once a client suggested him to try movies as a career. This girl was no less. She turned a lot of heads wherever she went)

He didn't use facebook or twitter. I don't know about whatsapp because I started using whatsapp in 2013. When I reached the location for reviewing the work I sensed something between them. She would always be with him, trying to ask him questions about work. I felt her getting really over friendly at times. I didn't like it and requested her not to be unprofessional at client place.

I left soon, she didn't do anything after I warned her.

But as soon as the entire team was back in our office I got an email. It was sent to the HR. I was copied too. It was that girl accusing my intern of inappropriate behavior.

I called my assistant manager (he was present there throughout the assignment). We had a long discussion and we were quite sure that the girl was accusing him for a false charge.

The story was that she asked him out. He never said yes. She kept on trying. He told her she was wasting her time. After constant trying and getting shot down, she couldn't handle rejection and decided to file a complaint. HR was quick to respond because the company took such matters very seriously. The girl was adamant on getting him fired and to spoil his career. HR was helpless. There wasn't enough evidence to save him. (That time I wished if it would have happened on Facebook, atleast there would have been some evidence)

On my and other team members’ requests the HR decided to let him leave without any adverse remarks on his work certificate. I lost a wonderful prodigy because of one false allegation.

What's the worst a woman can do to a man?

She can destroy him, his career, his future, his life, his dreams, and lay waste to his talents.

A young guy, only 19. Nobody believed him.

PS. I don't know what happened to him after that. Whenever I tried his number I got the switched off message.

I do receive a birthday wish from him every year via SMS. I reply and try to know what has he been up to. His reply is always the same,- please don't worry about me. I'm happy and living a wonderful life.

EDIT

I am anonymous to protect the privacy of the boy. This incident was kept very discreet.
The reason why HR acted that way is because a couple of months before this incident, a girl from our office was raped by a driver. It was in news. The bosses did not want further bad publicity. They decided to wrap it up as quickly as possible. They used the boy as a scapegoat.
I resigned in protest. I've been working in the industry since 6+ years.
As to what happened to that girl? Well since we hired her from our KPO she was scheduled to go back. I gave her the worst review I had ever given to anyone. I heard that she was unable to go for an international rotation because of my bad review.
136.2k Views · View Upvoters · 13.2k

Never waste time in chasing people.
Never beg anyone to stay in your life.
Never procrastinate.
Never judge people in the first look. You never know what is their story.
Never seek attention.
Never belittle people who own lower positions than you.
Never be narrow-minded. This limits your growth.
Never announce your goals. People will know themselves.
Never be ashamed of yourself.
Never imitate someone.
Never be a people pleaser.
Never lose calm on petty things.
Never share all your secrets.
Never trust anyone blindly.
Never stop reading and learning.
Never bring negative thoughts about yourself just because you didn't succeed last time. You will this time.
Never waste your time in impressing others.
Never get impressed by good looks, wealth and luxuries.
Never talk bad to your parents.
Never respect anyone just because they are elder than you. Respect because if the reasons that they deserve to be respected.

Anonymous
Anonymous
Updated Dec 24, 2017



Men. Men scare me The kind of men I met in my time as a young prostitute.
I met decent men who would pay & do as much discussed. I met cheap men who would haggle beforehand, and after. Scared men who wanted to lose virginities. Scary men who would get off by hitting & cursing me. Men who were not attracted to their wives. Men who just wanted someone to comfort them. Men with weird fantasies. None of them scared me.
What scared me were the other kind of urges. Men who wanted me to pretend that I was their daughter, niece, or just a random underage girl. It made me sick to the stomach but I did all those things. Because I thought if it weren't for a barely adult prostitute like me, they would do these things to actual children. And the kind of things they did and said to me during those role plays, I can't imagine even an adult woman being able to handle that.
I have met men who wanted me to act like they were raping me. I did that too all the while being scared of the woman they actually had in mind. They didn't just want to 'bone' their classmate/coworker/friend/relative. They actually wanted to sexual harass her in the sickest way. Sometimes even their own wives. I had a regular who was engaged. He would pretend I was his fiancée & do the sickest things. He told me he can't wait to get access to his fiancé after the wedding. Once he stopped seeing me, I can't help wondering what sorry state that poor girl was pushed into by her unknowing parents. Another man gloated about something heinous he had done to his pregnant daughter in law, and how she would never speak up against it because of 'good' family values.
And these men weren't exceptions, and obvious criminals and creeps. It was literally every second guy. And they were harmless looking men with decent jobs and families. 'nice' guys who women and other men would respect and trust. My experience has shown me the reality of sexual predators. Paedophiles and rapists aren't uncommon and isolated from the society. They are parents, relatives, friends and employers. My blood boils everytime a victim comes forward & someone says 'Was she decently dressed?' / 'Did she turn him on?'. I get chills down my spine everytime I see a child acting wary of a person or place. I feel scared for my friends everytime they turn someone's advances down, or even accept them. I wonder how rampant sexual assault would be if it weren't for the law.
I have learnt paedophilia and rape aren't about sex. It's about ego ,power and control over the victim.
------------------
EDIT : Thank you for the love and blessings, good people. I'm in a much better place in life now. To those worried about sampling bias, I'm sorry if my first attempt wasn't clear enough. I'm not saying that 'every second man' in your area's population is like that. I'm saying men like that not the rare & obvious specimens. They could be your childhood friend or your uncle, and you would hardly know. Two of the men I remember to have visited me for paedophilic urges bumped into me much later in life. One was a reputed dentist and another a librarian in a school. And no, not all men who visited me knew they were in the wrong. Some just hadn't found the chance yet, some the guts, and some were just scared of the consequences. Men who fantasized abusing women, most of them had already done things. And it isn't about a harmless fleating thought or consensual roleplay like the BDSM community. They had urges regular & strong enough to act them out with a dummy(me). Considering the men who visited the women in my area were the only men ever to have such thoughts, it was still a number big enough to scare.
I don't know about you, but if someone has 'mere' strong fantasies to sexually violate a child/woman they know till they die of the pain, I wouldn't ever trust them alone.
Just.. Listen to kids when they want to avoid a person or place. Listen to your gut when a trustworthy & charming man/woman starts wanting to be alone with your child or you. Never ignore micro expressions and lingering glances. Be careful for red flags before you allow yourself to be vulnerable with someone.. But.. What can we do when even some parents have incestuous paedophilic urges.. Just.. God bless humanity.
648.8k Views · Upvoters 35.9k

Anonymous
Answered Apr 15 · Upvoted by Tatiana Estévez, works at Quora


This is the first time I am sharing this with anyone. Going anonymous because I have many friends in quora and I dont want share these details about me with them.

My father had an extramarital affair with my mother and he was already married and had 4 children, three boys and a girl from that marriage. Because of his infidelity, in came lil old me, a babyboy. Nobody wanted to accept me. My mother wanted to abort me because I will ‘ruin’ her health and body but due to medical complications she wasn’t able to do that. My father did not want anything to ruin his marriage. But it was my destiny and I came into existence.

So what do you do in a country like Pakistan where societies pressure is too much and to save face, my father married my mother

My father was a very rich guy and was an only child of his parents and he did not have any relatives and my mother was from a small family who ran away from her home to become a model in Karachi, Pakistan.

During my birth, my mother passed away due to heavy blood loss and some other medical complications. So, my father took me to his own home where he lived with his first wife and their children. He asked her to care for as she would for her own children and because of my father’s power and authority she couldn’t say anything and had to obey his wishes.

I think life was good and I like to think it was good. When I was six years old, my father passed away because of heart attack. It was the most depressing day of my life. But then what happend with me, I would not wish it upon anyone.

One month after my father passed away, I was watching cartoons with my siblings as suddenly my mom (I did not know that she wasn’t my real mom) came into the room and slapped the shit out of me. I started crying and asked her what did I do?

I can't forget her words when she said that “I will make your life so ugly that you will regret the day you came out of that LovePeddler. I am not your mom and if you ever call me mom again I will kill you. You are the son of a LovePeddler and I will make your life so miserable that you will want to die”. I could not understand what was happening to me. Why my world suddenly changed from happyland to this hell.

She then looked at my siblings and told them complete story of my biological mother. They were all in their teens. She said to them that I was not their blood and they will treat me as they will treat their enemy otherwise they will also face punishment.

After that day my life went from bad to worse. I was not allowed to sit on dining table to eat with them. I was not allowed to continue my studies and she gave the reason to my school teacher that I was being homeschooled. I was not allowed a bed to sleep on. I remember when ot was summer, it was so hot and I wasn’t able to sleep because the living room was also too hot with AC or even a fan as I was not allowed to waste electricity. So Tiptoeing, I went to my siblings room where it felt like paradise with the AC. I put my blanket down on the floor and slept their but Paradise became hell. I was awakened by a hard kick in my head. My big brother who I used to adore and idolize and whom I trusted to protect me suddenly became my enemy. He then grabbed me by my hairs and pulled me up and then threw me away like a garbage back in to the living room amd said to me “How dare you come into our room you bastard. Now this is your place and If I ever see you again come in here I will beat you so much that you will not be able to recognize your face.”

That night I did not sleep. I cried and cried until I had no tears left and asked God why it happend to me? What did I do wrong?

In the same routinely abuse, three years passed. Now I was nine years old and a big boy. As I became older so did the intensity of physical abuse and emotional abuse.

My middle brother loved watching boxing. We had cable television in our home and his friends use to come over to watch TV. One day he asked me to come and watch boxing with them and I was baffled by this because If I was ever caught watching TV that meant I will be beaten by a thin pipe as it happend too many times to keep count. So I hesitated but went in there to watch boxing with them. After ten minutes, my brother asked me If I would like to play with his friends. I said okay because they were laughing with me or at me. They taught me proper boxing stance and taught me how to throw a punch. Here I was learning to box with kids twice my weight and atleast 7 years older than me. So the game started and my brother asked me to throw a punch at him and try my best to hit him and I did but I missed him and then he punched me so hard in my stomach that I went to ground with excruciating pain. Then he mocked me and said you are like a girl, crying on small things and he along with his friends started laughing. Angrily I got up to beat him up but was unsuccessful in my attempt and then he beat the shit out of me including kicks. I was bleeding from my nose and mouth. Our maid took me to hospital and said that I had fight with my friends at school. The maid also did not do anything and kept to herself only.

I don’t want to tell you the story for each year but I will tell you some example:

My brother used to wake me up by burning my toe with lighter. Now my toe has dead skin and its dark brown in color .

I was not allowed to study, read a book or watch TV or go outside our house other than to buy household items.

On summer, between 2 am to 6 am I use to sleep outside the room of my siblings because I was able to get burst of cold air from beneath the door which felt like heaven.

Only good time was when they all used to go outside the country for vacation. I was able to enjoy myself a little.

When I was 13 years old, I decided that it was enough and I ran from the house. I lived on the streets for one month and I had some money that I stole from my stepmom purse. Then came an elderly man and an angel for me who asked me about my home and I told him that I don’t have any. He took me to his home and I met with their family. He was a professor in a university in Karachi. He told me that If I feel comfortable I can live with them If I promise to study and improve my life. He also had two more girls just like me who he picked up from street and raised them as his own.

Present:

Now I am 25 years old, I am educated. I have a university degree. I have a job. Because of my baba (elderly man). I still have burnt toe. I still have cigarettes burns on my back. I still remember the sounds of countless slaps. I still remember my broken fingers.I still remember that hunger and empty stomach. But I still remember. I still remember everything.

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