₦airaland Forum

Gboliwe: He addressed me in English language as 'his brother' didn't you read that?

Dats y its good to make ur gender obvious "sister".

Onlytruth: Cha cha cha Igbo kwenu!

Kwenu!!

Kwezuonu!

Ndigbo ga adi ndu!

Umunne m,

We have done it yet again. We have just successfully organized the freest and fairest online elections ever recorded in Nigeria.
Onye si na o di nfe, ya bia me ka anyi hu! (if anyone says it was easy, let him attempt it, let's see how far he can go!)

The feat is remarkable by any standard: the HIGH performance standard of our electoral team led by our able Chief electoral commissioner PointB, and our queen -Eze Nwanyi Ndigbo Nairaland Ogugua88; then the defacto "protocol officers" of the electoral commission -9ja_I-hail and manny4life (our just discovered data processor in chief!); ezigbo nwa Igbo Afam4eva who worked closely with our Mod friend OAM4J; all these ensured that the process was transparent and spotless. The process was so superbly implemented that at a time I thought I was watching a US electoral process!

Igbo kwenu!

I wish to quickly congratulate my brothers in arms Alex101 (oyiri Eze 1 of Nairaland -he is just like me! ), and Biafra_rep who I'm sure would have made a great Eze as well. Umunne m, you graced this process with your offer of service, and I promise that you shall be given that opportunity to serve Ndigbo here; just get ready, we are now where we need to be. Ugo eberego na mgbagbu! Thanks for a great brotherly "fight".

I wish to also congratulate the entire Igbo nation who made this a thing of pride for us all. Though a few of our people attempted to deviate the process, they were largely gently nudged into line, and some of them repented when they saw a smooth process unfolding. Heck even non-Igbo trolls joined the effort to deliver a flawless process! It means we are gradually winning the moral war with the force of our cultural moral values. Soon, we shall deliver a knock out punch on the satanic forces trying to hold Igbo down, and foist our own standards of morality on Nigeria, nay Africa!

Igbo kwenu ozo!

Umu Igbo di nnukwu egwu!

Some few hours from now, I shall unfold the methodology of the new Eze Ndigbo III tenure which begins today (Saturday March 2, 2013).
At this juncture, I wish to thank Ngwakwe, re@lchange, xtgozie, tChidi (my latest wife by fire by force ), and ALL other volunteers who have already offered to work for Ndigbo. As for those who have not volunteered, please start thinking of what you are good at now, and offer your service when I put up a thread for recruitment of Igbo Nairaland "government". I shall do that before the end of today Saturday, March 2, 2013.

Finally, I wish to thank our outgoing Eze Odumchi for his service to Ndigbo. Forever, there will be Eze Ndigbo Nairaland II, and his name is Odumchi.

The celebration shall run hand in hand with the formation of our new government.

Ka Chineke gozie Ndigbo (May God bless the Igbo nation). Isee!

Signed,

Yours truly,

Onlytruth, Ndu di n'eziokwu 1 of Igboland.

Igweeeeee may ur throne last forever. May your bed be filled with many lolos, may ur reign bring us propserity. I wish to congratulate u on ur victory as the Eze Ndi Igbo 1 of nairaland. I'm proposing u take a title. And I will be at ur service to remove every skepticism and cynicisms.
Your loyal subject xtgozie (ogbu efi Chukwu Ka Odi Na Aka).

Gboliwe: Where you send me, I will go. What you say, I will do.
My allegiance I give.
I am female by the way, Aburo m nwa nna gi!

Understand dat nwanna means same father. Of which our Royal Majesty(onlytruth) was right in adressing u as such. Na one papa born all d igbos. So u be nwanna m. "Igbo bu otu"

gugua88 ezenwanyi achala Ugo. I de dis side. Send my ofe nsala

Special Senior or senior special adviser on sceptikal and cynical matter. I volunteer my self.

I sincerely want to be a special senior adviser on skeptical matters.

FreeGlobe: some of them are married to Yoruba or Hausa so you wouldn't blame them efulefus.

Nwanyi welu ya nwayo.

saintohia: ^^^^^

Biko nwere ya nwayoo


.

No touch my meat ooooooooooooooooooooo , plenty cow de to slaughter. Point B has sent for more palmwinw, and Ezenwanyi is making sure our utala akpu, utala Ede, utala ji na ofe nsala is well prepared. So go di oda side make I cool don chop joor.

zikaengee: Congratulations to our new Eze Onlytruth.
May God direct u on how to serve us better.
When is the celebration starting abeg?

So u de here de enjoy u no call me. Nne oburu obele congratulations.
May God give u d Wisdom he gave Eze Nri 1, the first Eze ndi igbo
And may amadioha bless u with many lolos. and lots of concubines.
Have a fabulous reign

ogugua88: [size=13pt]Now? Lol.

Congrats everyone on a successful election! Plenty of ofe onugbu, nwkobi, and nmanya to go round![/size]

Finish the stout biko. I don't want to take the leftovers home

See my hand bring d ofe Ede come this side.

New Yorker's documentary takes in depth look at Igbo tribe in Nigeria and their path at rediscovering Jewish heritage

Tali Farkash

Published: 

07.14.12, 08:28 / Israel Jewish Scene

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A new documentary by New Yorker Jeff Lieberman called Re-Emerging: The Jews of Nigeria is taking an in depth look into one of the most unique 'Jewish' communities in the world: The Igbos of Nigeria.

 

Lost Tribes?

Lieberman's film is a rare testimonial to the daily life of a group that for years has been living off the official Jewish radar and in a political atmosphere of massacres between Christians and Muslims with the constant threat of destruction over their heads.



 



Jeff Lieberman 

 



Vibrant and joyous it celebrates what it sees as its Jewish roots. Make no mistake, this is Africa, but Africa Jewish style.

 

So how did Jews get to Africa? And why has no one heard of this community until now? That question has a simple enough answer: The group is part of one of the largest ethnic tribes in Nigeria; the Igbo. A tribe with millions of people and the Jewish community making up only a small fraction of that number.

 

'Nigeria's Jews'

Lieberman explains that the unique situation of the community in Nigeria is a direct result of local history. The Igbo were influenced by traditions brought in by the missionaries who came to the region in the time of British colonialism.

 

The similarities between what the missionaries brought with them and the ancient tribal traditions led to mass-conversion to Christianity. The fact that Christians also offered a life of economic security helped.

 

The Igbo were always called 'Nigeria's Jews', they have the Jewish mentality, they're smart, and they work hard. That also turned them into a murder target, Lieberman added.


According to Lieberman, within this huge tribe, lives a community that still defines itself as Jewish in every way. In fact, Lieberman said that should they be offered the opportunity to convert to Judaism they would be offended. In their eyes, they are as Jewish as any other Jew.

 

And while the ancient traditions are now all but extinct, there is still a group within the Igbo who believed that they were part of a different story, one they could not define. Everybody there has a history passed down from father to son, that they came from Israel and that they belonged to the "ancient Hebrews."

 

When the internet came into the picture, some of the people there tried to use it to understand what it means to be Jewish. Their location and inaccessibility to the outside world did not allow them to learn about Jews and Judaism before the internet age.

 

One photo started it all

They existed in a kind of bubble, says Lieberman, and one of them, a young man named Samuel, who is in the movie, learned about prayer and the Jewish lifestyle from the internet and then taught everyone else.

 

The project started when Lieberman who was living in Los Angeles at the time, attended a lecture at a synagogue. The speaker was a conservative rabbi who had recently returned from Uganda and Nigeria, and as he showed photographs Lieberman became captivated.

 

Yet it was one specific photograph that set the journey into motion: “It was a small building in the middle of a wooded area. You wouldn’t notice right away, but there was a large Star of David on the building – that picture was completely wild."

 

Lieberman, who at the time was looking for a subject for his documentary project, felt that this was what he had been waiting for. He told the rabbi that should he decide to return to Africa, Lieberman was coming with him with his camera.

 

At first, the rabbi didn't take him seriously; Lieberman had never before been to Africa or even filmed a movie independently. But after a great deal of nagging, he agreed.

 

Meanwhile, in Africa the 2,000 Igbo community members used the information from the internet to begin living the Jewish way of life: Keeping kosher, observing the Shabbat, prayer and even ritual immersion in a nearby river.

 
The tribe's commitment to being part of the Jewish nation is evident in every frame in the film, yet with that commitment comes a heavy price. Some of the community members were ostracized by their Christian families and in many cases, the situation gets violent.

 

Living the Jewish lifestyle in Nigeria is in many ways a death wish. In Nigeria, which for years has been tottering between the Christian west and the Muslim north, massacres are part of the daily routine.

 

Lieberman says that the presence of active terror cells is a known fact but al-Qaeda and its local extensions have yet to realize the Jewish community growing right under their noses. Yet when it is discovered, fears of a targeted massacre could become a reality.

 

Lieberman notes that this constant threat did make him constantly reconsider whether the film was a good idea as the last thing he wanted to do, he says, was endanger these people in any way.

 

Yet he added that the community felt that it was more important that their story be heard, that the Jewish world recognize them and their way of life and that should anything happen to them Israel, or global Jewish communities would come to their defense. They are unwilling to give up their right to legitimacy and exposure said Lieberman.

 

Seeking recognition

As for their attitude towards Israel, Lieberman believes that is a very complex question. He said that at first he thought that the Igbos were using their newfound Jewish roots to get a better life in Israel but the reality is completely different.

 

Their way of life, he says, is not an excuse to leave Nigeria. There are those who wish to visit Israel and see where their forefathers came from but for the most part, that is all.

 

Lieberman adds that from what he understood from the community, Israel rejected their request for citizenship. Now, they have no aspirations to make aliyah, they are considered to be a relatively well off group. What they want is a connection, recognition.

 

Reactions to the movie throughout the Jewish world were mixed, notes Lieberman. He said that on the one hand, he had received a lot of positive feedback with many synagogues throughout the US looking to screen the film. Proof, he believes, that there are communities open enough to learn about another kind of Jew.

 

On the other hand, there were a large number of people who completely rejected the idea and who are very suspicious towards the Igbo.

 

Lieberman feels that the movie was a powerful experience. He said that the Igbo welcomed him with open arms and made him feel completely at home. He believes that the documentary's message is that Jewish variety should be celebrated.

 

It is possible that Abraham and Sara were black, we don't know their color but they were certainly not white or blond. If you ask a Nigerian Jew what color Abraham was he will answer black naturally, Lieberman added.

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Part 3 – Myths About Being Single

Look at the prejudices and stereotypes many people have about being single.  Almost nothing positive is ever assumed about singles.  Our own negative attitudes lead to fears and anxieties about being single.  That is why a positive attitude is your first line of defense.  Because of the many prejudices society has against singles, it’s easy to believe that being single is boring, sad, depressing, unfulfilling, and a negative experience that should be avoided.  These unrealistic statements only serve to make the problem some have with being single worse.  If you believe such statements, then you have probably pursued relationships for the wrong reasons.  Remember that you have to be happy with yourself first.  However, it’s difficult not to buy into these myths.  The first step is to recognize the myths and realize they are not true. Then we have the opportunity to resist them by being examples of happy singles.  Think about your prejudices towards being single. What negative thoughts do you have?

Let’s pick apart some common myths about being single:

• Singleness equals loneliness. 

This is simply not the case. The only single people who claim to be lonely are those who choose to be lonely.  One of the reasons why singleness seems so scary is because of the term itself:  Single.  It has almost become a swear word in today’s society.  It creates the image of a lone person, going through life with no friends and no family. Is this what you think of when you hear the word “single?”.  “Being single” only means the lack of a marriage or dating partner.  To call yourself lonely when all you lack is one person in your life is irrational.  A lonely single is actually a selfish single because their focus is on themselves instead of on others.

• A relationship will help me feel better about myself.

A relationship is not an insurance policy for happiness, satisfaction, or fulfillment.  A relationship will not magically solve or cover up your problems.  Forget about all the perfect-couple images painted by the media.  Relationships actually magnify existing problems and create new ones.  Part of being in a relationship is learning how to solve problems.  If you can’t solve problems on your own, you won’t be able to do so with someone else.

If you don’t feel good about yourself, then you need to work on that before seeking a relationship, as people generally don’t look for someone with low self-esteem.  One of the key points that I state here several times is that you must be happy with yourself first.  The purpose of entering into a relationship is to share yourself with another person; not to try to get from someone else what you feel lacks in yourself.  Relationships (romantic and other) can’t be all “take” – you have to give as well.  Expecting someone else to fill your voids usually results in disappointment, a sense of failure, and resentment.  The way you feel about yourself is apparent to others, and if you seek a relationship hoping that the other person will somehow improve you, you will actually end up driving that person away.  You have to be happy with yourself before you can expect to get along with others.  If you believe that you cannot be happy on your own, you will be less confident and more dependent on others for your happiness.

If you feel trapped by singleness and are looking for someone to rescue you, then you need to first work on becoming content as a single person and gaining more confidence in yourself.  Become successful as a single first before worrying about success in relationships.  If you’re not content with being single, then you probably won’t be content with a relationship either.  Don’t make your happiness dependent on whether you are in a relationship or not.  Life is too short to spend a majority of it feeling depressed over something within your control.  You already have the key to unlock the singleness trap.  You just have to choose to use it.

Abraham Lincoln said, “Most people are about as happy as they make up their mind to be.” 

• If I’m single and can’t find anyone, it means something is wrong with me, or that I’m a failure. 

Being single can be very unsettling and can certainly make people ask themselves, “Is there something wrong with me?”  The answer is no.  Every one of us has something wrong with them.  Nobody on this planet is perfect.

Failing at something does not make you a failure.  Regardless of how many times you have attempted and failed, it does not mean anything is wrong with you.  It simply means that there are changes that need to be made.  However, you should try to look at what you have done and make an effort to change what you know isn’t working.  Use this time to take an inventory of yourself and see if there are any personal areas you think you could improve in.

One site I came across used the analogy of a baby trying stand up by himself, hanging onto a table leg, and can’t stand up. He tries it many times, many ways, until he can stand up.  The result is that everyone around is proud of the baby accomplishing his goal. If the baby had not achieved the goal of standing up, would you  think there was something wrong with the baby?  Would you think he was a failure?  So, why do we as adults think that we are failures when we find something harder to do later on in life?  Just like a baby can learn the new concept of standing on his own, you can learn the new concept of being happy as a single person. 

• Being single is unacceptable and I must be in a committed relationship as soon as possible. 

You might think that committed relationships and marriage are the ideal lifestyle, but it’s not the only lifestyle.  If you believe that being single is unacceptable, then you will end up seeking relationships just because you want one, because “it’s the thing to do”, or because “everyone’s doing it.”  This often leads to unhealthy relationships, unnecessary stress, a worsened self-image, and emotional burnout.  You are your own person.  Your decisions should not be based on what everyone else is doing.  Remember when your mother would say, “If everyone was jumping off a cliff…”?

David Hawkins wrote this in an article of his:  “There is a faux love going around – attachment hunger. Or, what I like to call, the surge leading to the urge to merge. In these cases, loving feelings take on an urgency and desperation and therefore, instead of leading to ‘enlarging and changing the self,’ lead to distortion and narrowing of the self. This difference – that a loving passion enlarges us while an addiction inevitably diminishes us – is a crucial distinction.”

Bottom line:  Being single is not unacceptable by any means.  What’s unacceptable is seeking a relationship for the sole purpose of having one.  It’s also selfish.

• Singleness is meant to be a “waiting period” for finding the right person. 

This may be true for some, but it’s not an across-the-board fact.  If this is made the main focus of singleness, it actually becomes overwhelming.  You may have heard the term “waiting for the ship to come in.”  That creates the fallacy that one day, you will find that special person and then your life will suddenly become meaningful.  The idea of “waiting” can give you the false impression that something is missing.  This can have a serious negative impact on your life.  You may put off certain plans and aspects of your life until you happen to meet someone.  As time goes on, you’ll realize that you have been wasting your life away.  It may get to the point where your only goal in life is to find someone, and you’ll find yourself feeling unmotivated to take care of other things.  Don’t put your life on hold just because you are single.  You are the only one that decides how you will live your life.  You can make the most of it, or you can let it waste away; it’s your choice.  None of us knows what is going to happen in the future, and if you are presently single, this is a time of opportunity for you.  Your singleness is what you make of it.  It can be a good experience if you want it to be.  So, instead of wasting time just waiting around for the “right one”, use your time as a single to get to know the person that is responsible for making you happy – that’s you. 

• Accepting singleness is giving up or admitting defeat. 

Accepting singleness is not a defeat; it’s a victory.  Despite the way it sounds, accepting singleness does not mean resigning the rest of your life to an unhappy state of being single.  Accepting singleness means that you have conquered your fears and anxieties about being single.  It shows that you do not buy into the myths and stereotypes about being single.  It is not easy to accept singleness and many people think they can’t do it, or will even refuse to do it.  When you accept singleness, you are declaring that you are strong enough to do life on your own, and that you don’t need another person for a crutch.  It shows that you are independent.  Accepting singleness means you can resist the constant feeling of needing to be a part of a couple, regardless of the influences around you.  You are making the most of this time in your life instead of wasting time in unnecessary despair.  Lastly, and most importantly, it means that you are happy with who you are.

• There are no advantages to being single. 

As much as I didn’t want to use tired old clichés in here, the saying “every cloud has a silver lining” applies here.  Remember that there are two sides to being single.  As I mentioned earlier, it’s easy to focus exclusively on the negative aspects of being single.  This can lead us to the false notion that there are no advantages to being single.  The fact of the matter is that there are advantages to being single, some of which are described in next section.

[color=#000099]What other prejudices, myths, or negative statements about being single are you aware of? Continue to read open this link http://coolpenny./2013/02/

Noiseless2: The hausa/fulani and Yorubas have onece again hyjacked this exercise as usual in Igbo matters, when the like NGBATICOASTERS & BOKO HARAMSTERS such as dayokano and co couldn't even help to expose their known ids, one wonders how many fake igbo ids they created waiting for these days.

Even those who would do anything to see onlytruth dead for of supporting Biafra are now hailing him for what they see as a u-turn.

Don't even break a sweat about it. What is going on in this tread is none of its kind in d world. We have shown any tribe that cares, that we a ever proud of our heritage (Igbo),and I'm well convinced that we are leaving a whole positive form of legacy behind for our up coming generations to stand on. No mind dem. "Igbo Erika", " Igbo Ebuka" Igbo di nu udo" "Igbo di na otu".

9ja_I_hail: Your vote count.

Nna dalu irne for confirming my igbo origin. nna m ukwu bu 9ja_I_hail, biko abum nwa afo Aguata di na Anambra State I'm not from Imo State. But still at dat, Anambra na Imo bu umunne. I won't mind getting a chieftaincy title from d easten heart land.lol. U guys (election committee) are making us(Ndi Igbo) proud. Jisi nu Ike. "Igbo bu otu" "Ndi Igbo bu d wisest"

I hope my vote will count.
I just learnt from a dear friend, dat my brothers and sisters (umunnem) are electing a new Eze Ndi Igbo of Nairaland.I saw it a pleasure to vote. And I will also use this opportunity to thank all of u, whom have identified and contributed to this thread and all other threads dat has promoted Ndi Igbo interests. May the God lord contribute and identify with ur own interests. Continue being proud of our. Heritage. "Igbo amaka","Igbo esika", " Igbo di egwu" Igbo Ebuka", Igbo bu otu".
Udo chia.

Part 2 – Influences

Let’s take a look at some of the influences that can cause us to have negative views on being single.

• The Media
 
The media tries to convince us that being part of a couple is ideal.  Turn on the television, and all you see is show after show pile on the notion that everyone has to be in a love relationship. A majority of situation comedies, drama shows, and soaps will show characters that are either married or are in steady relationships, those that hop from one relationship to another, or those that struggle with dating or looking for a spouse.  These types of shows can influence how one feels about the need for a relationship. Music can be another media influence. You may be listening to the radio and hear a love song with sappy “oh-I’m-so-happy-to-have-you-let’s-stay-together-forever” lyrics.  There is one song where the singer is saying “I can’t go on if I’m on my own.”  Now think about it – it’s pretty extreme to say that you will cease to live if you find yourself alone.  I’ve never heard of anyone dying of singleness.  The Internet is another example.  If you Google the word “single”, the common theme among a significant portion of the results is dating. 

Although it’s easy to become influenced by the media, remember that you’re only seeing one side of the coin here.  You may need to limit your exposure to certain types of media in order to keep from feeling bad about being single.

• Your Acquaintances

The acquaintances that you have – your friends, family, co-workers, etc. – can also influence your feelings on singleness. It’s not easy when most of the people you know are married or in relationships and you feel like the odd man (or woman) out. This can give you the feeling that something is missing from your life, or that you are “running behind” everyone else. A short-term solution to this is to try to avoid situations where there is a predominance of couples. This might mean turning down an invitation to a party if you know most people will be there with a spouse or date. If you’re brave enough as a single to go to an event with mostly couples in attendance, then, by all means, go for it.  (Chances are you won’t be the only one flying solo.)  If not, then it’s best to spare yourself the heartache. I know that may sound contrary to what others may tell you, but it really is best not to put your emotional well-being on the line.  Of course, this is only a temporary solution.  The end goal is not to isolate yourself.  You should work on gaining more self confidence so that you’ll be more comfortable around couples.

Note that I wasn’t suggesting that you should abandon your friends.  Take the initiative to arrange gatherings with friends and acquaintances of your gender. For guys, you might have a poker night. For ladies, you might rent what is considered a “chick flick” and invite other ladies over for a movie night. This way, the element of couples is removed and you can focus on having fun and not let depressing feelings ruin what should be a good time. You should also strive to make friends that are also single so that you have someone that can relate to you and vice versa. You are entitled to enjoy the company of friends. As you progress towards becoming a successful single, you will have enough confidence in yourself that you won’t have a problem being around couples.

• Your Environment

Suppose you go into a public place, such as a store, and you see couples walking side by side all around you.  How does that make you feel?  The environment around you can be another influence on the way you feel about singleness.  Unfortunately, there’s not much you can do about this one, short of becoming a hermit.  Unlike being able to turn off the television, you can’t escape your environment. This is one area where you have to learn to play through the pain.  Remember that you’re not out to be like everyone else; you are your own person.  As I stated in the last point, as you progress towards becoming a.......... Continue reading to PART 8 of Living The Single Life: Becoming A Successful Single. click link. http://coolpenny./2013/02/26/living-the-single-life-becoming-a-successful-single-part2/

Amaka 23498334
Chii 20DD2709
Ezinwanne 32A8A2F7

Being Single Is Priceless

Part 1 – Introduction

You’re probably here because you’re single and feel like you have no place to turn.  There are a lot of people out there that are single and feel uneasy because of it.  This is something I’ve been working through for quite a while, and still continue to work through, and I want to help others that are in the same situation.  We have to understand that very
often we will experience uncomfortable trials for the greater benefit of others.  I feel the reason that I’ve had to be single for almost all of my life was so I can learn lessons and gain experience and pass on the knowledge to others.

I would like to state that I am not “anti-relationship.”  Becoming a successful single is about learning to be happy with yourself; it’s not about an outright rejection of couplehood.  Learning how to be a successful single will give you the right perspectives, put you in a better state of mind, give you more self-confidence, and reinforce a positive image of yourself.  The way you feel about yourself is apparent to others.  Whether your goal is to eventually find a relationship, or if you just want to become more accepting of being single, this information should help you make your time as a single a positive experience.

I don’t dispute the fact that there are many advantages to being in a relationship or marriage.  However, some of us are just not able to find that special someone, no matter what we do.  It’s rough being a single person in a couples-based society.  Feelings of loneliness or emptiness, societal prejudices towards singles, and personal fears about being single can make us perceive singleness as a much bigger problem than it really is.

Being single can cause us to feel like we’re trapped.

Why does being single feel like a trap?

Being single can dominate your thoughts.

Being single can make you a slave to the idea of finding someone.

Being single can deprive you of your ability to enjoy life.

Being single can cause desperation, depression, and fear.

How do you feel about being single?  Do you feel you can’t be happy without a relationship?  Do you feel that everything would be just fine if you could find that one special person?  Do you feel lonely?  Does being single make you think negative thoughts about yourself? 

Being single is a problem that affects a great number of people.  What is it about being single that makes people feel bad?  Why are people ashamed of being single?  We typically go by what we see around us.  Messages about couplehood are everywhere.  The message that we’re being fed is that being single should be kept to a short amount of time or avoided altogether if possible, and that you should do everything that you can to find someone.  In order to become a successful single, you must be able to recognize and resist the forces at work that make you feel bad about being single.  One of the biggest misconceptions in our
society today is that you need to be a in a relationship in order to have a happy and meaningful life.  However, satisfaction and singleness are not mutually exclusive.  Life doesn’t have to be a difficult and depressing ordeal just because you are single.  

Being single is only a problem if you let it be a problem.  There is no reason to be
depressed or embarrassed about being single.  It’s affected me for a good portion of my life, and sometimes still does to this day.  I used to believe that it wasn’t possible to be happy while being single.  I couldn’t and wouldn’t accept being single.  Now I’ve learned otherwise.  You can let the term “single” make you think of all the negative stereotypes associated with being single, or you can use the power that you, and only you, have to inspire and encourage yourself to become a successful single.  There are many singles out there that have overcome our situations and led happy and fulfilling lives.  The problem is not that we are single; the problem is our negative views about being single.  Les Brown said, “You are the only real obstacle in your path to a fulfilling life.”

Becoming a successful single requires you to have confidence in yourself.  Without self-confidence, it will be very difficult for you to be successful as a single.  Judith Bardwick, a sociologist, says “Real confidence comes from knowing and accepting yourself – your strengths and limitations – in contrast to depending on affirmation from others.”

The first thing that you have to do in order to become a successful single is to have a positive attitude.  A positive attitude is your first line of defense.  Your attitude determines your level of happiness. Don’t worry if it takes you a while to be accustomed to being happy as a single person. The time it takes doesn’t matter.  The most important step is to get started now.  If you want to become a successful single, you have to want to change.  As the old saying goes, “If you change nothing, nothing will change.”  You may have already decided that you want change by reading this.  I’m giving you the information you need to make a change. You have to take the first step.  I can’t help you unless you help yourself. 

When you think about it, nearly everything in life has two sides to it, and the same goes for being single.  It’s easy for us to focus exclusively on the negative aspects of being single while completely ignoring the fact that there are also benefits. If someone picks up on this and points out that we are being negative, we defend ourselves by saying that we are only being realistic.  The truth is that it’s not realistic to concentrate on the negative side of any situation.  Being realistic means examining both sides of a situation and recognizing the advantages and making the most of them while minimizing the disadvantages and handling them in a constructive manner. 

Choose to be optimistic when it comes to being single.  William Arthur Ward said, “Real optimism is aware of problems but recognizes the solutions, knows about difficulties but believes they can be overcome, sees the negatives but accentuates the positives, is exposed to the worst but expects the best, has reason to complain but chooses to smile.”  I want you to be able to apply this quote as it pertains to being single.

Every one of us strives to be happy and fulfilled.  However, too many people make the mistake in thinking that they need a special someone in their lives in order to be happy.  If you feel that you’re not worth anything unless you are part of a couple, then you won’t be.  On the other hand, if you decide that your time as a single is a great opportunity to be yourself and make yourself happy, you’ll find single life much more fulfilling.  A positive attitude will be your key to finding happiness in being single.  Just like everything else in life, being happy as a single person can be learned, and the learning can be fun as long as you look at it as a positive experience. 

You should never measure your self-worth by your relationship status.  Would you dislike a friend or relative simply because they are single?  So, why hold yourself to a stricter standard?  There are bad people in relationships, and good people who aren’t.  Relationship status is not a good way to determine anyone’s worth, including your own.

Regardless of individual circumstances, you can start by taking these several steps:

Accept the reality of being single.

Allow yourself to feel sadness about being single.  Acknowledging your feelings helps you recover.  Denial never solves anything and only delays the inevitable.

Adjust to your current environment. Acknowledge that right now, you are single. 

Begin to put closure to your situation and move on.  Do not continue to let your singleness take its....... Continue to read the whole parts of this article, from PART 1- 8 of
Living The Single Life: Becoming A Successful Single. click link to read all. http://coolpenny./2013/02/25/living-the-single-life-becoming-a-successful-single-part-1/

Igboland is the home of the Igbo people and it covers most of Southeast Nigeria. This area is divided by the Niger River into two unequal sections – the eastern region (which is the largest) and the midwestern region. The river, however, has not acted as a barrier to cultural unity; rather it has provided an easy means of communication in an area where many settlements claim different origins. The Igbos are also surrounded on all sides by other tribes (the Bini, Warri, Ijaw, Ogoni, Igala, Tiv, Yako and Ibibio).

The origins of the Igbo people has been the subject of much speculation, and it is only in the last fifty years that any real work has been carried out in this subject:

...like any group of people, they are anxious to discover their origin and reconstruct how they came to be how they are. ...their experiences under colonialsim and since Nigeria’s Independence have emphasized for them the reality of their group identity which they want to anchor into authenticated history. (Afigbo, A.E.. ‘Prolegomena to the study of the culture history of the Igbo-Speaking Peoples of Nigeria’, Igbo Language and Culture, Oxford University Press, 1975. 28.)

Analysis of the sources that are available (fragmentary oral traditions and correlation of cultural traits) have led to the belief that there exists a core area of Igboland, and that waves of immigrant communities from the north and west planted themselves on the border of this core area as early as the ninth century. This core area – Owerri, Orlu and Okigwi – forms a belt, and the people in this area have no tradition of coming from anywhere else. Migration from this area in the recent past tended to be in all directions, and in this way the Igbo culture gradually became homogenized. In addition to this pattern of migration from this core area, other people also entered the Igbo territory in about the fourteenth or fifteenth centuries.

Many of these people still exhibit different characteristics from that of the traditional Igbos – for example geographical marginality, the institution of kingship, a hierarchical title system and the amosu tradition (witchcraft). For some time some Igbo-speaking peoples claimed that they were not Igbo – the word was used as a term of abuse for “less cultured” neighbours. The word is now used in three senses, to describe Igbo territory, domestic speakers of the language and the language spoken by them.(see (A.E. Afigbo,1981: Ropes of Sand, Caxton Press,Ibadan. and T. Shaw:1970; "Igbo Ukwu: An Account of Archaeological Discoveries in Eastern Nigeria", Faber and Faber, pp. 268-285).

The first contact between Igboland and Europe came in the mid-fifteenth century with the arrival of the Portuguese. From 1434-1807 the Niger coast acted as a contact point between African and European traders, beginning with the Portuguese, then the Dutch and finally the English. At this stage there was an emphasis on trade rather than empire building, in this case the trade consisting primarily of Igbo slaves. With the abolition of the slave trade in 1807 came a new trading era, concentrating on industry (palm products, timber, elephant tusks and spices). At this point the British began to combine aggressive trading with aggressive imperialism.

They saw the hinterland as productive, and refused to be confined to the coast. In 1900 the area that had been administered by the British Niger Company became the Protectorate on Southern Nigeria, also incorporating what had been called the Niger Coast Protectorate. Control of this area then passed from the British Foreign Office to the Colonial Office. Long before it had officially been conquered, Igboland was being treated as a British colony. Between 1900 and 1914 (when Northern and Southern Nigeria were amalgamated) there had been twenty-one British military expeditions into Igboland. In 1928 for the first time in their history, Igbo men were made to pay tax – they were a subject people.

This attempt to take over political control of Igboland met with resistance and cultural protest in the early decades of the twentieth century. A nativistic religious movement sprang up (the ekumeku) which inspired short-lived but feverish messianic enthusiasm. The rumours that the Igbo women were being assessed for taxation, sparked off the 1929 Aba Riots, a massive revolt of women never encountered before in Igbo history. However, the engine of imperialism could not be stopped, and once it had begun, Igbo culture would never be the same again

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