₦airaland Forum

dagr8: I have re-sent it....

i m having issues wit yahoomail.

dagr8: I have replied you

I cant see anytin oo

dagr8: lol...Jesus! yetseyi haff killeth me o....I actually did not say it that way.

what way did you say it. dnt make me go digging for that post. U knw I ll find it.


my dear, you are too young for that car na....

Says who abegi loved that car from the 1st day I saw it. I ve not seen it recently though.


anyway make I no talk too much before you say I promised BMW ...Can't afford a BMWX6 for you for now


By thy words thou shall be .............


oya what can you afford whisper to my ear pls

Ok o ...ayam waiting

You can't use only dagr8 to generalize na, that is not fair
Send me a PM let's talk

owkiee Tried sending u a PM

bettydee: Ermm.......pls o,dis chatbox thread is all about what n why did they put sticky? Don't mind me o,m a 1st timer n wld luv 2 join if m allowed though. I cn see daddy mintayo here n whereva he is,I bliv can't b a bad place. Also, hpy new month 2 every1 here.

its a xtian chat box
i tink the sticky shows that its always at the front page of religious section .
if u wnt to knw whats its about check the first page of this thread pls.
You are welcome


LOL @ Dady mintayo

dagr8: Eyi m1 of NL
Yetseyi has been missing, Mintayo where is your......? 18th is her birthday

Wow you remembered my birthday
sooo nice
its been a yr since i joined chatbox
U know u never sent my gift. U promised me the real version delivered @ my doorstep.
I only saw the e-version .
I ll let bygones be bygones

anyway what i need this year is a BMW X6. I jst love the car.

u have 16 days to deliver

If i have time I ll dig that post of urs out of NL archives

all this brothers that dnt keep to promises
Diaris God ooo

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=10154255706370012

morning guys.
I feel you all should watch this

Mintayo: I am fine,how have you been? Whatsup with ur phone?.
I am missing you at the "otherside".

Been good
Well I am supposed to go for it today. I was told that I should call to confirm before coming and the number I was given is switched off.

I really dont have time to go there today Jare. Busy week for me.

"otherside" loool


Francis Tony happy brithday

dagr8: Ok...since those guys have refuse to score, let us come and pitch tent here.
Yetseyi mentioned something canopy ministry, is so common.
That stuff looks like one harmless "just friends" friendship...But I had to sit down and reflect on it when you hear people mistakenly refer to your friend as your fiancee or questions repeatedly come asking you if you are going out with that person.
Unless it is deliberate, I don't think is something to be encouraged among Christians.
If opposite sex have to be close, it should be well defined and limits set.
If people begin to assume that something romantic is happening between you then most likely you guys have cross the limit.
Unfortunately the ladies are at disadvantage...someone else may be eyeing her and at the same time he is feeling bad that she's taken not knowing she is "free" like freetown .
Although,ladies too can be funny when it comes to stuffs, I have a real experince like that.
Friendship can lead to solid relationships but if the brother is not saying anything for long..place him where he belongs(A brother in the Lord) and the limits be set as well





Theres nothing wrong with having a friend of the opposite sex just ensure he s nt covering you from other potential suitors




.

ATMC:
@yetseyi lol...Omo yhu are 'hotting' tonight o No give room for canopy ministry...Its not ur calling! buh I shaa like the term canopy...mmmmhhh#sings Under the canopy...cano cano w.d.g hehehe

ihedinobi2: True. I was guilty once upon a time although I plain didn't know it at the time. In fact, tonight was the first time it occured to me that that was what I was doing.

I think marriage is serious enough business for people to be a little more careful of these things.

flee from every appearance of canopy ministry

I must add that a lot of our christain brothers are very selfish.
They hide under religion to do some evil things
you will think they are better people because they are religious, quite a number of times the opposite is the case.

be ye not moved by a big bible carrying, tounge speaking reboshing and scaboshing brother sometimes they are the most lethal of the pack.

dagr8: kai...you sabi that minstry?
God forgive me o

ehen naaw especially all those fellowship brodas them too like dat thing

ihedinobi2: So there's this thing I'd like us to discuss. It may seem a little bit frivolous but it's a major paradigm considering that it affects the very foundation of human society - marriage itself.

At a meeting I attended last Sunday, I heard it described for the first time as closeting. That's another word for the perhaps more popular friendzoning.

[/b]Among us Christians, we do have a phenomenon that corresponds to the friendzoning thing. Back in the uni in those fellowship days, you'd find people pairing off in such a way that you assumed that there was something romantic in it. Sometimes there was, sometimes there wasn't. Whichever the case was, it resulted in any other potential mate deciding to keep their distance because, well, the brother or sister was considered taken which sometimes was not the case at all. This is often costly for some people. And perhaps sometimes a savior?[b]

What do we think about it? How should relationship across genders be for us Christians? What do you think the Bible says about it? Is this one of those things that the Bible says nothing on?

In sch days we used to call it canopy ministry
Some christain brothers are so fond of this you just see them around a lady almost every time
They wont do, they wont allow the person that wants to do do it
Some people dont fear God.

Its simple if a brother is coming around you and he is not showing forth any official interest abeg just avoid moving with him too much. He can call ooo but all those walking you to the hostel, Holding hands,Sitting with u in class, going to fellowship together has to stop.
It just gives an impression that theres something romantic between you two while there isnt and it is always detrimental to the females

SalC: Lol how are you dear

fynnneee

who has seem ATMC

Mintayo i see ya

evening everyone!

SalC: Btw today is friday again? Any thing for your [/b]guy?[b]

Sal C is is a male

dagr8:
The no3 will be better

well no 3 is better but not always the easiest depending on the kind of man involved.

Mintayo: Interesting. Have we al considered the fact that submission by the woman is only "unto the Lord". What d'you all say to that?

hian only unto the lord ke?

I thought it was wives submit unto your husband as to the lord

dagr8:
The no3 will be better

Mintayo: Actually, scripturally,its two shall become one in every area. Whatever the wife has belong to the husby and vice versa.
But[b][/b] some women out of fear that their husby will cheat on them will do anything to ensure that he doesnt get any better then they are.[b][/b]
Again,i have seen two of such.
btw,how are you,how far with ur phone?

That exactly is the issue. its really about the foundation
the woman are scared that once he is successful he will become promiscuous
The men are scared that if she becomes more successful/richer as the case may be she would begin to disrespect him and not be submissive


I took the fone to carlcare Ikeja they said i should come back moonday

Mintayo: The generalisation is not so good. Not all African men. I have a seen man who ensured that his wife became a Professor while he was just a first degree holder working with the Kwara state government. It got to a point that the children were bothered and concerned,but he told them that once she is through,he will continue with his. Not all husbands. Not all african men.

I agree with you. Most african men would never want a lady who is "'more educated'" and to be honest sometimes I dont blame them.
Some women have dealt with men ehhhn just coz they are making small Kudi
You want to know who is humble let him have money or power then if he is still humble he is humble.
You want to know a submissive woman let her just have a little edge over her husband if she s still submissive then shes a submissive woman


There are men that would say I m ok with this first degree but you if you have the zeal to go further I will support you with everything.

And there are some men that will not marry a woman because she is an aspiring masters degreee holder
Insecure set of guys

Let me not even start this morning.

dagr8: lol,may be I should reframe the question. You have a dream you cherish so much, a time came for you to step out to achieve the dream, your hubby is not in support of it and knowing the Bible asks the wives to be submissive. Would you go against the husband's authority and still go ahead with the dream or you would give up the dream?

Okay since you have decided to rephrase the question let me give you an answer.

Firstly If I have a dream i cherish so much my husband would know from the husband-to-be stage and Its my duty to find out his reaction to whatever dream I have if he doesnt support then I weigh options.

1. Can I leave this dream aside coz he is not in support and move ahead with him
2. Should I go ahead with him and hope he will support the idea when the time comes
3. Or should i let him go and follow my dream.
Thats before the I do stage.

When you get married there are other people and things to consider not just 'I' and there are also options to choose from.
1. Should I go ahead actualizing my dream whether he is in support or not and cause friction in the home
2. Should I leave the dream aside, let go and remain unfulfilled
3. Should I try to persuade him to see reason with whatever I want to doand make him realize that success in my dream will not mean disrespect to him as my Head

life is a matter of choices.
DaGr8 pls I m not dodging the question ooooo i have answered it

Mintayo: Do you actually know that there are some women who does not want their husband to be more successful than them? I have seen two,if not three.
Let me too stop here first

really why on earth would a woman not want hussy to be more sucessful
Like I said earlier sebi @ are now one flesh


Hubbys sucess is wifeys sucess
Wifeys sucess is husby sucess

The moment the individual doesnt see things this way then na real wa

I dunno sha but people see things differently.
I thought 2 should become 1

dagr8: @Yetseyi, if you find yourself in that story, what would you do?

hmmm

well its always easy to say this is what I will do when you re not in the situation so Da gr8 I may wont answer that question

ihedinobi2: Hi guys

So

ihedinobi2:
Before the Nairalandquake that destroyed many of the buildings here, there was a thread about a married woman who had a dream she once tried to pursue but which her husband objected to. The first time she listened to his nay-saying about how it was too big and whatnot and how she should not pursue it. Later she saw opportunities to actualize the dream and took necessary steps, linking up to dignitaries who bought into the idea and funding was all over the place. Still the hubby stood staunchly against it and her marriage became difficult.
Imagine that this is a Christian marriage, that is, both man and wife are believers. What would you advise?

sorry I left things unattended for so long. It couldn't be helped just then. I'm back now and we'll pick up where we stopped.

I understand that we don't see much to discuss in the economic rights of women. How about we look at through the Nairaland lens?

If you hang out at the Family Section just a little bit you'll find a few discussions focused on who should provide what, on how bills are shared, on inequality of economic opportunities between the two genders etc. These things are the sort of things I hoped we would examine.

Should a married woman work if and at whatever she wants? Does her husband have any right to dictate her career movements? How to reconcile the role of motherhood and the role of career woman? Bill-sharing? And, something we already touched on, how to protect women from economic exploitation when they have no man?

Could we work on those questions from now till Tuesday? Throw in any more you want.

since no one has said anything about this let me start.

i am going to analyse this from the broader view:

A lot of guys actually do not want their wives to be more sucessful than they are. If there is any way it is going to happen they would most likely cut it off. But its supposed to be that success for one spouse means sucess for the other.
Some do not want their women to have financial independence
Some feel bad if their wife is a bit ambitious e.g she wants to go for a masters and maybe he still has his first degree

If you look down to the reason why husbands try to prevent their wives from being sucessful its quite a lot from selfishness to insecurity to ego .

But then there are guys that would support their girl/fiancee/wife to whatever level they want
lemme stop at that

dagr8: Wow! you are very observant,...just noticed it

the one below my page changed from 27 to 64
Make una ask seun

[quote author=The.Big.Urban]I wish the average christian on this chatbox listens to this message and stops stereotyping me as the bad guy.

Forgive me [/quote]

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=4746640164162&fref=nf

You guys should check out this link
Watch the video oooo
Racism sucks


Then this one where an australian woman was chanting racist words againt a chinese


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZBdYvN49eRU

Anonimus da gr8 i see ya in HD

Theres a point at which anger stops being a healthy emotion and becomes a driving force. Like a drug you need larger and larger doses. Once that happens you move even further from forgiveness, because without anger you have no energy at all. Its what drives hate groups and extremists. Without bitterness they have no reason to exist. if you take bigotry from the racist, revenge from the zealot and chauvinism from the sexist,whats left?

Bear with each other and forgive as the Lord has forgiven you

Bitterness is fatal it kills your soul

Forgiveness is for yourself not for the other person.


Morning peeps Have a very nice weekend

dagr8: What is happening No show today?
Ihedinobi2, Uj_sizzle, The.Big.Urban , Texanomaly, yetseyi...come and scatter this thread na..Is weekend already

I may not be able to type much this weekend
my fone is bad for now currently using one kin fone wey no dey browse

However before i set out for the day i would just type some thing we could all ponder on.


By the way Sal C and Da great willl you guys stop all this hausa stuff

Mintayo: Yea. Just saw the mail now. Will reply or call you,soon.

kk thanks

henry9dayz: fast dude...Shea u wanna preach to her _

Mintayo happens to be my very good friend

Sal C: Morning dear, are you sure Sal C is a he? Dagr8 thinks otherwise, now whose report shall we believe?
And why is it difficult to take Sal C as just human without trying hard to decipher his/her gender?

you are a male, you are a male, you are a male

Mintayo: how is it going? Lets talk on whatsap.

My fone has issues thinking of taking it to their office for warranty repairs.
Using a non browsing fone for now.
I sent you a mail check your inbox

Mintayo: I am fine o. How about you?

Very cool ooo