₦airaland Forum

AImiron:
https://www.pulsesports.ng/sports-gist/story/israel-adesanya-in-trouble-as-ex-girlfriend-reportedly-demands-half-of-his-wealth-2023051111525597354

the devil is very intelligent. First he make men(Foundation of the home) to misbehave, then cause the law to change to favour women (who are builders of the home), then make women to take advantage of the law, destroying the home and causing children [who are the future
of tomorrow) to grow up in broken home, thereby destroying the structure of family. now everybody eyes is opening, men no longer see value marriage as it is now becoming an advantage for women to make wealth. NaSo baby mama go dey reign, very soon baby mama too go come get in own wahala and men will either turn gay or just bullshit anything to do with women. Then what the Bible day women will be looking for men will come to pass.


What I'm I even saying it has already come to pass

CuriousStudent:
She is in Naija men good book. They don't hate women having sex,they just hate the idea that women put a price on their body.

A woman dating a broke student for the four years of university and giving him daily sex for four years while cohabiting with him and doing abortion for him is "good" in their eyes,as long he is broke

But if it's a rich man she is dating and giving sex,they will frown.

na her money she dey use buy food, na she dey pay the rent no be the same guy go throw birthday party, buy gifts, take her out, yet you tag am broke abi

DownTime44:
Hi guys


Please i put up this post basically because of my elder brother. I sincerely want to know if i was wrong talking to him, or I could have just let him be. I wasn't myself ever since i talked to him, and i was somewhat having guilty conscience since then.


I have an elder brother, he's 38 years old and also the first son. I am the fourth child in the family of five. The second child is a female and she's married. We lost our third child, that's my immediate elder brother some years back, while i have a younger brother. I came from a humble background. Lost my dad while i was in JS 3, even before his death we had been hustling on a daily basis for survival, and we live happily as one big family. My mother, siblings and i do hawk daily before we could eat. All thanks to public school in Lagos, my family wouldn't have had the opportunity to basic education. We hawk daily after school, weekdays and weekend. My family was bred and brought up in Ajegunle.


Few years after the demise of my father, we struggled to pay house rent. We had to leave Ajegunle to a local and developing area. I didn't allow my family conditions deter or weigh me down. Never! I believe I'd make it in life legitimately without venturing into crime, fraud, theft etc. After my secondary school, i was into all sorts of labour work. I worked in factory, building site, cleared bushes, laundry man , just to save up and further my education. I worked for 6 years after my secondary school, bought a bike from the little savings i had and proceed to school through jamb. I gave the bike to someone who often deliver #6,000 weekly for the upkeep of my family. I was in year 2 when i let go of the bike, it was on a higher purchase and the agreement we have had elapsed. I hustled my way through school and graduated. I'm done with service last year but couldn't land a job, probably due to my age. I'd be 29 this year and most graduate trainee often request for age below 28. Although, i had a 2.1. I'm only managing in a pure water factory to make ends meet, keep soul and body together and support my family


I sat my elder brother down and talked to him. He has been hustling like every other person in the family but i don't understand what's happening. He didn't futher his education nor learn a handwork. He's 38 but still live under his parents roof. He has been doing conductor work for many years. The family had talked to him several times to look for something else. It's fine you are hustling as a man for survival but doing conductor for many years without thinking of what else to do is wrong. A family friend of ours who later got to know what he does for a living had advice him also.


The bus he was following, the driver had misunderstanding with the owner and he collected his bus back. My elder brother had been idle for months, doing nothing. He claimed he has gone virtually everywhere in search of bus he could be working with but couldn't get any. This is a family that we all had to bring something no matter how little to survive. I was talking to him as a younger brother. I asked him why didn't he heed to people's advice when they were advising him then to stop the conductor work and look for something to learn, if perhaps he doesn't want to further his education? He doesn't believe in Nigeria education, because he could count graduates without job or those with petty job. My elder brother wear almost rag as clothes. I had to give him some of my little wears I'm managing. He has just one slippers. We don't wear same size of shoe or sandals, we could have been sharing that also. He sold his phone to feed sometime ago and had been without phone. I was initially saving to get my mum a small phone but i had to give him the phone instead.


He was crying when i was talking to him. I understand the situation of things in the country, which i myself is going through. I was just trying to know what other things he could come up with. I am not happy seeing him sitting idle doing nothing. The fact that he's the first son and found himself in this condition at that age breaks my heart daily. My mum had been so worried about his condition. I had to convince her that things will be better. I don't want her to develop high Blood Pressure that could lead to her untimely death.


Please guys was i wrong talking to my elder brother?

I have a few things to say to you. You might be surprised that he is the way he is, because he had to sacrifice his needs for you and your siblings to have it easy. Being the first son and a father figure comes with lot of responsibility. I have so many guys like your brother Sacrificing alot. Most won't show you how they do as they will prefer to go through your mum. My advice is apologize to your brother . Ask him what is his goal and then try to see how you can support him achieve his goal.

beekind:
I am a 38 year old Nigerian American citizen dating a 26 year old Nigeria girl.
I grew up in Nigeria but travelled out to the USA when I was 25 years old, I am a citizen now and doing really well for myself.
I met a beautiful and godly Nigerian girl on facebook and we have been dating for some months now we are now thinking of marriage, she is in Nigeria while I am in the USA.

Some weeks ago my dad asked me to do some tests and send to him, (He is a medical doctor), I did them, turns out to be fertility tests and all was perfect.
I just told him about my fiance and my plans to get married in some months time and he said she has to do fertility test before he can agree to the marriage.

This was very shocking for me as he insisted that it is his position, I haven't told my fiance cos I dont know how to and my fiance is scheduled to pay my parents a visit for the first time in Port Harcourt in 2 weeks time.
My fiance is from Delta but lives in Portharcout as my parents while we are from Port harcourt.

My dad has said if I cannot tell her that he will, what do you guys think ?

Honest advise please and admin kindly push to front page for wider advise.

Thanks.

your dad is protecting you. I just hope she is godly. because our girls hear America omo pretending done start. If she dey fake am she go show you shege when she get there. SIGN PREUP

Odewaleadesoye:


VANGUARD

carry space ship

depz:
I wish this world will just end let all of us both rich and poor just die.. I wish all the nuclear weapons in this world will just explode at once and kill all of us, every single living thing on this planet,all of us are idiots.

if you dey find die go die leave us where one live make we live. which kind wahala be this

depz:
Very Good. Let him go and rot in hell, burn there. If he has a son, that one too will join him soon. If he has a daughter, she will follow suit. His wife too will join him too, she will die under the tires of a dangote cement truck

My God Ate you okay, even if you have a person problem no be here you go settle am now. you self if get heart attack die now now as you dey see this message wertin you go tell your maker. life is too short to be filled with this level of hate. please get a therapist

mariahAngel:
It is never a Nigerian university.

and lectures will soon go on strike again.


All i wanna to say is that, they don't really care about us- Michael Jackson

How many Nigerians are in Sudan that Nigerian government cannot fly them all back to Nigeria. We have airforce cargo planes where are there

[quote author=Newton2024 post=122598526][/quote]Any man or woman with multiple sex partners before marriage will cheat when they get married. Sexual sin is difficult to stop.

Kobojunkie:
Again, the point here is that this issue of depression is behavioral and if you don't tackle it on an individual level, probably through changes in behavior and mindset, you will never be free of it.

your absolutely right

Kobojunkie:
This amounts to a fking bullsheet summation of what is instead my existence. I came to the USA carrying depression in my head so my struggles with mental illness had nothing to do with any of my actual experiences here in the US but the fact that I had a severally depressed brain right from living in Nigeria. Fortunately, I eventually found treatment and worked on my mind and life. And just when it began to overwhelm me, I found the solution to it all and freedom from all mental delusions since then.

Please don't go around attempting to write everyone's life with the same pen that is yours. That is insulting!

As I said it been 23 years brother. So relax, those where come now are not in the same shoes as you. By the way UK is not UK of 23 years ago, same with the US you went to. Nobody is try to paint your life picture, everyman his own cup of tea so relax we are all here to learn from each other not Insult one another. For me I'm leaving my best life but I can't deny the fact that my first year abroad was loney and depressing. Las Las everybody go dey okay

INDUSTRIALFAN:
I’m on a cleaning job. Na only 3hrs daily I see. Some people ego no wan let them do cleaning job. I just got into the UK in January. The cleaning job is not what we want but in the intervening period, na to do work wey de available till something better comes along as long as I can pay bills and clear debts.

nice one brother for here big man no dey as long as you pay the bills. You will win more grace

INDUSTRIALFAN:
me sha de enjoy the uk I de o. If no be debts i de settle for naija, i for no get any worry but atleast i de clear am 500k per month. I dunno why they re complaining. Maybe cos I’m an introvert sha and i love my quiet space

shey u dey work somepeople never find work, plus them get debt for house, some people work na slave work u understand. Every man shoe dey different. More grace man

Kobojunkie:
1. I had to become close to my family. I had to become familiar with my environment — this all took significant work and time on my part — before I then became as familiar with them as I am today. These things did not magically happen. I took a change in behavior and mindset on my part to make that happen. By the way, I have lived abroad for over 23 years now.

2. Sitting back and making ridiculous excuses for why you should not do what is common sense is not the way in life.

like you said 23 years. In those year s there have been alot of meltdown and depressed moments before you became OG. for us where just enter here leave us to complain our complain . By the way your advice has is one way kept myself from going nut here

Gerrard59:
You live with it or take the next available flight to Nigeria. Alternatively, you ensure things work well in Nigeria so that you enjoy your cultural heritage and live in prosperity.

na people like you go say person where dey depressed should suck it in instead of speaking out. Go and relax jare. Even oyibo dey complain about depression talkless of foreigner

Kobojunkie:
1. So, the same depression no dey Nigeria at all? Look, this is per person problem and should be treated as such. There are equally Nigerians out there who cannot stand a day in Nigeria as they find life there as depressing as hell. Do we then declare Nigeria a depressing place to be?

you don't understand. At least you have family and friends, you are familiar with the environment you grew up in. When you go abroad culture shock, lifestyle shock, hustle is not easy omo plus na rice and potatoes and chicken you go dey chop on the steady some food becomes luxury, your mental health go just crash. Babe no dey, guy no dey, your country men dey hustle as you dey hustle no time to see omo

Alll i see is women who are not maturedfor a reasonable relationship. High earner or low earner does not matter in a relationship. If she marries you because you earn more what happens when you don't bring home those amounts again or you lose your job. The truth is simple marry a woman not a gold digger, women must learn contentment

atheistandproud:
One of the many complaints I hear from women is that men are scarce. Really now? Did a mysterious portal suddenly appear and take a majority of the men alive to an alternate dimension? Well of course not.

One thing many guys failed to understand is that women are well versed in a language called double speak. What they mean is not that men aren't available, it's that the type of men that they want are not available. Now who are these men? Oh that's simple, high earners.

Most women want a man that optimally earns significantly more than they do. The conscientious ones will be more than happy to play a supporting role while the indolent ones will spend his money whilst saving hers. His money is our money after all.

What women however fail to realize is that as they start to earn as much and even out earn men, they soon climb into the category of the men that they once wanted. Now that they're earning the same or even more, it is very likely that they won't want those guys anymore.

A woman earning 30k doesn't want a guy earning the same or less. You could say the same for those earning significant more, even into 6 figures monthly. Why? Hypergamy. In one word.

Now for the average woman in society, there's every chance that they are most likely to meet up with average men. How many average men in this society can boast of solid job, much less earning 6 figures? This is why women say that men are scarce. Now why do women balk at the idea of settling with a lower income man?

Using a relationship as a way of explaining the flow of resources between individuals, the individual that earns more will obviously assume the majority of the financial burden of the relationship. They'll also need to sacrifice more, take charge, be more responsible and etcetera. In the case of a (legal) divorce, they also tend to lose more.

Unlike men, most women see a relationship for what it is. Now with a lot of them being a position where they earn the same or even more than the men around them, this proposition doesn't sound too good. Most women have chosen to hold out an wait for the mythical unicorn that is Mr Right. Because seriously, what does she get out of a relationship with a guy who's below her financially? She spends more, gives more, works more etc.

Usually when I hear this, I smile and I say welcome to being a man. I know a lotta women believe that being a man is very easy but a good number are finding out that's it's not so.

For hundreds of thousands of years, when men were sole breadwinners or at least they earned more, this arrangement of whoever earns more provides more was seen as fair and justified by women.

Now that the tables are flipped somewhat, a lot of women are appalled by the idea. The fact that some women have been taken advantage of by men also doesn't seem to help issues. But I could also counter and say women have been taking advantage of men the same way as well, presumably even more.

Ladies you see that middle class earning man making 70 to 100k and possibly more monthly, a lot of you are now those men. There are guys doing sales that earn below you, private school teachers that earn below you etc. These are the men make up the bulk of society.

With equality comes equal responsibility. As Myron would say, equality is not a buffet where you get to pick and choose. Men and women are equal now, so go out ladies, pick a man, take care of him and the children you give him till he or you dies. Let's see if we can see this equality thing through.

I mean look at it from the point of a man. He works hard, built his empire and then marries you just to take care of you and if care's not taken, your family and friends come along for the ride. Ladies can you do that?

I hang up my pen. Let the lamentations begin.

necz:
I disagree "POLISH PEOPLE ARE NOT FRIENDLY, 2YRS HERE GOING TO 3YRS NO SINGLE POLISH FRIEND BUT I HAVE FRIEND FROM UKRAINE, TURKEY, GERMANY ANYWHERE YOU CAN THINK OF, BUT NONE FROM POLAND "

I understand what you mean BUT saying they are not friendly is inaccurate. Poles are very shy set of people especially when you can't communicate in their language; This is the major reason why many of them shy away from communicating in English to we foreigners. They feel intimidated with English and they don't want to make a fool of themselves even when they know little English; Many of them want to learn but lazy about it, the same way we Nigerians feel lazy to learn Polish. So they need to be comfortable around you before they can really communicate or rapport with you even if they can communicate in English. I know this because I have them as friends (females by the way) zero male Polish friends

Every other thing you've said I AGREE 100%

no polish male friends.

Zagee:
This is all I got. Not sure how to initiate payment.

that's the school account details. Message the school for swift and IBAN number, go yo your bank and initiate the transaction

Zagee:
I'm trying to make registration payments. Any idea how to do that cuz I only got a bunch of numbers and the school name??

if ita school registration fees. You should be able to pay from your bank in Nigeria or using your card

Kswrthy:
I am trying to send you DM. Please respond, Thank you.

responded to your email

RisenJoe:
Pls where in Nigeria can I acquire an employable skill in cyber security

cousera for free

Zagee:
Krakow looks like a possible ground. Found some university of Economics pg study I'll like to pursue, considering trc and multimedia-hustle.

Krakow is 2 hour from wroclaw if you can come I can connect you to some movie gigs as part time hustle

Zagee:
Thanks. It would have been knowledge of polnisch, but Germany was on my mind.

then focus on it you will have lot of opportunities here.

pic 1 : Sazmani food house artwork
pic 2: Hala tagorwa river view
Pic3: polish easter egg

Zagee:
Obviously I can't work the germany route again so I'll have to accept my budget with poland in mind.

Quick question: What schools can I look out for?

(Factors)

I speak basic german(still learning)
A guy has to hustle(I got skills in multimedia+data analyst)

What are your takes to border towns close to Germany??

Time to pack-up..
Your response will be appreciated.

If its the best technology university, go to Wrocław University of Science and Technology (Politechnika Wrocławska) that school na for only serious minded people where sabi book. after them look for only public universities.

well wroclaw is 3hours to germany lot of opportunities, but you have to wait a year to get trc card, maybe your case will be different.

nice you have german knowledge wok on it job dey but try learn polish

I japa

GOTVee:
Even though I'm a born again Christian, I will like to use this opportunity to thank my fellow Nigerian Christians for voting massively for the candidate with the Muslim/Muslim ticket. This election has proven that we Christians and our Muslim brothers are one. Peter Obi tried to divide us by running a religious campaign but we Christians stood our ground and rejected him. May God continue to bless we Christians and Muslims for bringing this renewed Hope to our great country

Christian voted a man with dementia to be his president. Your are a disgrace. You for cucu vote blind man

Badadvisor:
How do i reach out to you privately if you don't mind

I responded

Badadvisor:
How do i reach out to you privately if you don't mind

send message on Nairaland I'll respond this evening

Mrshocker:
Igbos will be tamed in Lagos this time. Lagos have given them too much comfort.

New land use law must be reviewed for non-indigenous lagosians (confiscate there properties for state projects)

Thank you OYO,ogun,ondo,ekiti,rivers and all loyal northerners!!!
Oshe oloun to boju wa je.

We won 🥇
Special thanks to Peter obi for doing his assignment excellently even though his foolish followers don’t know why he’s on the ballot.

you just display you foolishness to the whole world

WE missed Abiola, we can't miss Obi. This election is a make or break for Nigeria. we Must get it Right