tRoOE:

Love concurs all

topup:

Perform?!?! Medical Problems are a different thing, totally. However, if it is something that can be treated, why not work through it, though if it can't be treated, I would have hoped that you both married each other for love first and so unless the love changes you still couldn't imagine being with someone else. Why has sex become such a big thing on everybody's agenda?? My answer; because everybody has been brainwashed into thinking that its one of the vital things for a successful relationship.

bigboyslim:

Oh really? and its not. right?

I can't comment if it's right or not. But, seriously, we worry SO much about it, and it's causing so much unecessary stress, we are lucky today, we got Viagra, Jedi Jedi, Chinese, this n that and doctors, helplines and meds to deal with a large number of 'performance problems'.

Truly and honestly, I would never put so much emphasis on sex or give it too much credit, because I believe if more effort is put into building a loving relationship, the relationship will thrive, but I mean apart from the sex, you have to talk, work, love, share finances, maybe have kids and communicate with each other (amongst other things), so if the sex is great, does that mean all these things come in line.

I don't think it should be:

Love
Sex Vs Finane, Extended family,
Children, Interests in Common,
Dreams and Goals, Chemistry/Attraction[/color

I think it should be sex in the list on the right as an equally weighted reason for a relationship. Sex is given too much weight these days as if a relationship/marriage/future/ REST OF YOUR LIFE can be based on sex you are currently/will have with a partner.

It's almost as if great sex to some people means everything else will fall in place too.
Whilst you can have the things on the list on the right, but if the sex isn't AMAZING of OLYMPIC quality, you disregard all the qualities and leave the person

-** As always, I cannot speak for everybody because there will be some people who are able to have amazing sex, then argue and disagree and not get along, but the sex alone is virtually the only reason holding them together.

I might get attacked, but I think that's selling yourself short, everybody deserves some love, and if you are substituting love for sex, it just ain't the same, after a while you'll get bored of the sex, and there will be nothing to fall back on.

topup:

I can't comment if it's right or not. But, seriously, we worry SO much about it, and it's causing so much unecessary stress, we are lucky today, we got Viagra, Jedi Jedi, Chinese, this n that and doctors, helplines and meds to deal with a large number of 'performance problems'.

Truly and honestly, I would never put so much emphasis on sex or give it too much credit, because I believe if more effort is put into building a loving relationship, the relationship will thrive, but I mean apart from the sex, you have to talk, work, love, share finances, maybe have kids and communicate with each other (amongst other things), so if the sex is great, does that mean all these things come in line.

I don't think it should be:

Love
Sex Vs Finane, Extended family,
Children, Interests in Common,
Dreams and Goals, Chemistry/Attraction[/color

I think it should be sex in the list on the right as an equally weighted reason for a relationship. Sex is given too much weight these days as if a relationship/marriage/future/ REST OF YOUR LIFE can be based on sex you are currently/will have with a partner.

It's almost as if great sex to some people means everything else will fall in place too.
Whilst you can have the things on the list on the right, but if the sex isn't AMAZING of OLYMPIC quality, you disregard all the qualities and leave the person

-** As always, I cannot speak for everybody because there will be some people who are able to have amazing sex, then argue and disagree and not get along, but the sex alone is virtually the only reason holding them together.

I might get attacked, but I think that's selling yourself short, everybody deserves some love, and if you are substituting love for sex, it just ain't the same, after a while you'll get bored of the sex, and there will be nothing to fall back on.

This is a real issue in most marriages. What will you do if you discovered on your wedding night and beyound that your husband you married can not perform at all in bed. Will u divorce him immediately, continue to endure or look elsewhere for what is lacking. Your view is needed please because it can happen to anyone out there.

bigboyslim:

@ topup

Must you always be so reasonable? You have a very valid point. while i believe that sex is vital in a relationship (at least at the onset) the other elements you listed are also vital too. There's nothing as good as leading a balanced life but as humans we are imperfect and we always tend to have a bias for certain elements over the other. I guess striving to achieve that balance should be the goal of both partners in any relationship.

Exactly!

That magical word 'balance', it's very difficult to achieve and maintain but we should all seek that. It is so much more easier to find a good sexual partner than a god partner for life. Maybe people have given up complete hope on finding true love and companionship these days. I don't blame them, but if there is a 'best' out there i.e. great partner (with many great qualities , including sex) then aim for it. Don't settle for any less, I'd say.

maborukoje:

sorrrrry, am very sure nigerians are not stupid especially d PUSSYcat around before i marry a man we would have done enough HONEYMOON before d official HONEYMOON so hw wont i know maybe he can perform or not 2 be frank in nigeria we believe in sexs before marriage isnt it for more talks and chat email mi on  mabos_olayemi@yahoo.com

vivaladiva:

that kind thing no fit happen ( we must try before we buy)

vivaladiva:

that kind thing no fit happen ( we must try b4 we buy)

bigboyslim:

@ topup

Must you always be so reasonable? You have a very valid point. while i believe that sex is vital in a relationship (at least at the onset) the other elements you listed are also vital too. There's nothing as good as leading a balanced life but as humans we are imperfect and we always tend to have a bias for certain elements over the other. I guess striving to achieve that balance should be the goal of both partners in any relationship.

topup:

Exactly!

That magical word 'balance', it's very difficult to achieve and maintain but we should all seek that. It is so much more easier to find a good sexual partner than a god partner for life. Maybe people have given up complete hope on finding true love and companionship these days. I don't blame them, but if there is a 'best' out there i.e. great partner (with many great qualities , including sex) then aim for it. Don't settle for any less, I'd say.