@ Outstrip
Rotflmao! You are making my day because you are just yarning dust.  Take a look at this thread and you will see the true face of Naija men and why any women. . . black, white, orange should count herself LUCKY and BLESSED to have a Naija husband.

https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-170112.0.html

I'm done with ya!


[size=4pt]Jeebus! KarmaMod was right! Sarcasm really does fly over some people's head! Aaaah! I have learnt my lesson today ooooh[/size]

Well I know for a fact that he has only been seeing this woman for 5 months. I came across something on our pc , he left himself logged in on yahoo messenger and they were asking questions back and forth to eachother like. Whats your favourite food? How many brothers and sisters do you have? Whats your father's name? rubbish like that! That was 5 mths ago. Any way I here she's introducing herself to people as his wife! He even took our son to her house without my knowledge at one point! He'll probably be getting our son to call her mummy soon!

tara85:

What I really want is advice from nigeian men because they are the only ones who are the closest to knowing whats going on in my husband's head!

We cant understand what is going on in your husband's head simply by virtue of being nigerian men too. Your husband is a selfish prig who has simply used you to obtain immigration documents. I will follow Leilah's advice and get his visa revoked ASAP.

tara85:

Well I know for a fact that he has only been seeing this woman for 5 months. I came across something on our pc , he left himself logged in on yahoo messenger and they were asking questions back and forth to eachother like. Whats your favourite food? How many brothers and sisters do you have? Whats your father's name? rubbish like that! That was 5 mths ago. Any way I here she's introducing herself to people as his wife! He even took our son to her house without my knowledge at one point! He'll probably be getting our son to call her mummy soon!

This is getting uglier by the second, he left you for a girl he met on the internets. You shoulda confronted him 5 months ago, but then again, he would have branded you a stalker for looking through his private conversations. It all boils down to what should be private and what shouldn't be between man and wife.

I pray your husband comes to his senses soon, hopefully he would. Making it work is a big part of marraige, don't give up yet.

I don't see how getting his visa revoked is going to help, he hates me enough as it is. It is not a wise thing to do. Afterall we have a son, and I also want to stay on his family's good books.

tara85:

What I really want is advice from nigeian men because they are the only ones who are the closest to knowing whats going on in my husband's head!

U should be asking ur husband that. Whatever is going on in his head would be known best to him and not to some strangers.

Also, I know of some other person that might know. YOU. U have lived with him for 7 years.

tara85:

I don't see how getting his visa revoked is going to help, he hates me enough as it is. It is not a wise thing to do. Afterall we have a son, and I also want to stay on his family's good books.

I wonder how a woman can put herself through living with a dishonest and irresponsible cheat who doesnt respect her.

I'm telling you. You shoudl have been watching out for this all along. You seem like such a nice person and not that type. Me I watch everything like a hawk. You really need to LEGALLY do something about this.

General Enquiries Section
Home Office Nationality Group
PO Box 306
Liverpool
L69 2UF

Their website is at www.ind.homeoffice.gov.uk (new window). They can also be contacted via telephone on 0845 010 5200 between 8.30am and 6pm Monday to Friday excluding public holidays. Please note that this number is heavily subscribed to and you may have to be patient in getting through.

You need to report the fact that your marriage is no longer subsisting and furthermore that your husband no longer intends to remain in the UK. This is the sad reality of the course of action you may need to take. I bet then he will come running back to you!!!

Eitherway he will have this other lady on the side. Well he must be making some sort of promise to her if she is calling herself his wife!!! you should tell the immigration he has another 'wife' because, according to her that what she is.

PLEASE and I mean PLEASE take this course of action,

Yes they are engaged to be married. When I confronted him about it. He said he was only playing her. He dumped her for a week or 2 but she kept calling him and begging him and he went back to her.Now it's back to square one again and now she claim's she's pregnant. I don't know if she's bluffing or used that as an excuse to gethim back.

I'm calling bull on this story. No woman is this dense.

Know what I reckon she really is pregnant. So leave them be and as I have said it will be the biggest kick in the ass he will ever get if you report him. There is no point in hanging around annoying yourself, let him have his 'real wifey, know what he will cheat on her too I bet. Take your son away from the like of him. Let him apply for LEGAL CUSTODY. Punish him by doing that also. I bet that girl really bloody well is pregnant. So, before she gets her papers to stay in UK also just like he did report THEM NOW.

I'm tellling you Tara people will actually give up on you. That is just unbelievable!!!! let him stay with his own kind who is now pregnant for him. So they definetely will be married all becuase he USED YOU FOR PAPERS don't let him away with this! get them both deported at once!!!

Sisikill:

I'm calling bull on this story. No woman is this dense.

u'd be shocked how dumb some women can be all in the name of "saving my marriage".

Sisikill, you no go kill me o. See, me laughing like a crazy person for here. Apparently a lot of folks don't get you. Woman abi na girl, you don make my day. Nothing do you o jare.

Tara, please read and digest what Sisikill typed. Therein lies the truth. The Nigerian men can't help you. Believe me, Sisikill has the answers. Do everything she suggested and you will get your husband back.

Ode buruku. Oko e so di didirin, you still get mouth abi na finger to type. Sisikill, me think she needs to see Dr. Phil, what do you think?

Everyone should just stop giving any form of advice. The situation is either a story or she just likes people telling her stuff to console herself.
You know what to do so stop asking anyone for advice. Its common sense. He doesn't love you, Get a divorce and file for child support.
If you ask for advice again from any naija man i will personally board a BA flight tonight and come down there to teach you a lesson, enuf

How the hell is she gonna get her naija husband back? he is engaged to a naija woman and she is pregnant for him!! now what in the name of almighty God can get him back now!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Unless she (Tara) accepts being a second wife (when it suits him)
Coz the naija one will ALWAYS be 1st,

CALL THE POLICE

Leilah, sharrap there!!!!

Why didnt U call the bomb squad on your own husband?

Oh uche it wasnt that bad now. I have sorted that out and that wonthappen again. My husband is very good to me, brings me everywhere and doesnt go missing. This is in the seven years we have been together, i also was taken to Nigeria. I did not feel the need to do that Uche. But I can assure you, if i ended up in this case scenario i would be only too happy to give the immigration officers something to do.

Not only HE used her. This naija lady did too. Heads should be rollin' man!

@poster

you are simply retarded. Are you serious , what man has the guts to fill his wife in about his mistress? he was/will never be proud of you. I think white women are so stupid when it comes to stuff like this, Face the truth HE USED YOU FOR HIS PAPERS,

am begining to dout this girl tara85,she is too good to be true.i 'v been in the uk 4 over 10yrs i have never seen any angel like she is.i dont believe her story and i wont until i hear 4rm her husband.


leilah
am doing my second degree @ portobello clge,i had my frst degree on sports science,i am thinking of cuming to grifith clge 4 d blackhall preparation exams nxt yr,goodluck with yrs

Hey Tara,


Here's what to do.

Invite her to your marital home.  Cook a nice meal for all of you.  Your husband and child must be present too.  Once you've all finished eating, send your kid upstairs to his or her bedroom and to stay there.

After this, just go naked right in front of her (I mean complete starkers).  Whilst pointing to your boobs, say that those were what you used to feed the child with whom she had just shared a meal.  Ask her as to whether she would like her own child to be without a dad.  Make a big scene of it.  After this, you then order her to leave your husband alone, or the gods would descend on her. 

As a Yoruba woman, she would know the significance of it and quickly leave your husband alone.  Trust me it works because Nigerian women do it.

His parents would be very upset with him to hear that you got naked in front of the mistress because they know what it means.  Even he would be shocked.

Good luck. 




kiwi992.

kiwi992:

Hey Tara,


Here's what to do.

Invite her to your marital home.  Cook a nice meal for all of you.  Your husband and child must be present too.  Once you've all finished eating, send your kid upstairs to his or her bedroom and to stay there.

After this, just go naked right in front of her (I mean complete starkers).  Whilst pointing to your boobs, say that those were what you used to feed the child with whom she had just shared a meal.  Ask her as to whether she would like her own child to be without a dad. 
 

Is the problem with the lady or with the man? Methinks that the problem is with the man.

Ur solution sounds ludicrous to say the least but even if it works, the woman might leave but the man would surely find another lady.

How do U keep the man interested in the mother of his child?

Bhola:

Sisikill, you no go kill me o. See, me laughing like a crazy person for here. Apparently a lot of folks don't get you. Woman abi na girl, you don make my day. Nothing do you o jare.

Tara, please read and digest what Sisikill typed. Therein lies the truth. The Nigerian men can't help you. Believe me, Sisikill has the answers. Do everything she suggested and you will get your husband back.

Ode buruku. Oko e so di didirin, you still get mouth abi na finger to type. Sisikill, me think she needs to see Dr. Phil, what do you think?

Dr. Phil? Heck no! The man is a hack, a Charlatan! He will ruin her life. . . finish her off telling her crap like "Believe in yourself! You are NOT a worthless human being and nobody has the right to treat you as one! You are Beautiful in you own right and you do not need a man to validate you." I tell ya, one day with him, she will be strutting around the house, channeling her inner Aretha Franklin, singing R.E.S.P.E.C.T and mouthing off to her Naija husband. . . an absolute NO NO! Please, I beg you, let's not do that to her. You know what they say, Whatever mumuness has joined together. . . only the Naija Husband can put asunder. We are not her husband and neither is Dr. Phil ooh!

kiwi992:

Hey Tara,


Here's what to do.

Invite her to your marital home.  Cook a nice meal for all of you.  Your husband and child must be present too.  Once you've all finished eating, send your kid upstairs to his or her bedroom and to stay there.

After this, just go naked right in front of her (I mean complete starkers).  Whilst pointing to your boobs, say that those were what you used to feed the child with whom she had just shared a meal.  Ask her as to whether she would like her own child to be without a dad.  Make a big scene of it.  After this, you then order her to leave your husband alone, or the gods would descend on her. 

As a Yoruba woman, she would know the significance of it and quickly leave your husband alone.  Trust me it works because Nigerian women do it.

His parents would be very upset with him to hear that you got naked in front of the mistress because they know what it means.  Even he would be shocked.

Good luck. 




kiwi992. 
 

Excuse me but what is this you are saying? She should UnCloth in front of the woman? Are you kidding me? What purpose will that serve. . . no one is interested in her naked body, especially her husband. What she should do is BEG the other woman to get naked so she can see what her husband is enjoying. . . who knows, she might get lucky,  see something she can copy from the other woman. I hear minor surgeries don't require spending the night at the hospital, so she can go in the morning and have it done before lunch, by dinner she is perfect for her husband.

I'll even go as far as saying while she's got the woman in her home, she ask them to have sex in front of her so she can take notes. . . some pointers on how to please her husband. It's the least the refugee girlfriend can do now, after all she just eat dinner and knowing how nice Tara, she probably won't let refugee girl do the dishes like they make them do in the camp.

I really don't know why this is a joke. It is not right to get your pleasure from another's pain. Haba. If you want a good laugh go to the yabbis section

Sisikill, I think I agree with you. We should not send her to anyone that will help her self esteem.

Seriously, Tara do not go to anyone that wants to help you with your complex. Your Nigerian man is the right one for you. There aint no better man or human being out there for you. So, please fight it out. Use everything you have to make sure, he doesn't leave you. I mean, work 120 hours and Bleep his brains off. Learn Yoruba, heck, I will even teach you the language and show you how to tie iro.

Outstrip, seriously, loosen up. If you don't get sarcasm, it's ok.

Honey, in as much as i hate to ask you to move on with your life, you can't force love on someone who aint ready to recieve it.

What hurts my empathy in this situation is the fact that you do love him ver much, i don't need a prophet to tell me that but what do you do in a situation where your husband wants another woman and dosen't give a blinking eye about you nor his son? I say he doesen't deserve a pearl like yourself and only you can draw that line.

My dear, its time you started thinking about your hapiness and the hapiness of that little innocent boy before your emotional trauma starts running out on him. You've been everything a wife is supposed to be to this man, given him a son and ready to follow him to the ends of the earth and yet he fails to realise he needs both of you in his life?? Well its either he's been bewitched or he doesn't have a sense for good things.

I really think you should gather strength and move on . . no my dear, its not about culture here . . i've seen racial-marriages work, if the parties involved really are into it . . he just prefers his new "lust" to you . . he's just hanging on to flimsy excuses to justify his fling with this other woman . .
Like someone earlier said, I pray he wakes up from his trance, but until then, you just can't sit back and watch him drag you to his fall. You deserve better, your son deserves better . . and your husband isn't ready to give you guys that.

Bhola:

Sisikill, I think I agree with you. We should not send her to anyone that will help her self esteem.

Seriously, Tara do not go to anyone that wants to help you with your complex. Your Nigerian man is the right one for you. There aint no better man or human being out there for you. So, please fight it out. Use everything you have to make sure, he doesn't leave you. I mean, work 120 hours and Bleep his brains off. Learn Yoruba, heck, I will even teach you the language and show you how to tie iro.

Do you want her to die trying?? What else do you want her to do?? She has already indicated her interest in moving to Nigeria with him, but he still doesnt think bla bla bla. Hasn't she compromised enough?? Why can't he teach her these "cultural thingys" he fears she doesn't know and then crucify her for not trying or not showing interest. Afterall when he went after a welsh lady in the first place, he knew before hand they didn't share same culture . . yet he was willing to live with it then . . so why not now? Abegi jare, the guy is with his senses!

The wedding vows they took, wasn't made for her alone. I'm actually wondering if her love for him was ever reciprocated, i hope to God it was . .

wow cute -ass loooooooooong time.
+osisi here o

plus_Queen:

wow cute -ass loooooooooong time.
+osisi here o

My dear, don't say what your eyes saw. I've missed you guys a whole lot, just been caught up in lotsa activities.

Trooe (aka omo eko) informed me you asked after me . . i'm well and bubbling. Hope you've been good?

Outstrip:

I really don't know why this is a joke. It is not right to get your pleasure from another's pain. Haba. If you want a good laugh go to the yabbis section

I'm sorry. . . get pleasure in other people's pain? You are Kidding right, take a look at the thread again and see who is getting pleasure from pain. One would have to be a Masochist to want to remain in a relationship where 1) She is has been told she is not good enough 2) She has been told she is not wanted 3) Her husband does not have an iota of respect for her 4) Her husband does not want to be seen with her 4) She works herself to the bone to keep a roof over her family's head yet gets insulted for it 5) Told her in every which way that he does not love 6) Her husband has no qualms flaunting the other woman in her  face. . . yet she says she wants to know what she can do.

People. . . even the Naija men I sometimes make fun of for their Lord of the manor attitude, have told her get it together, have some respect herself, be good to herself and what does she say. . . she can't coz she loves him.

Someone is getting pleasure from pain alright but it's not me. . . thank you very much!

Bhola:

Sisikill, I think I agree with you. We should not send her to anyone that will help her self esteem.

Seriously, Tara do not go to anyone that wants to help you with your complex. Your Nigerian man is the right one for you. There aint no better man or human being out there for you. So, please fight it out. Use everything you have to make sure, he doesn't leave you. I mean, work 120 hours and Bleep his brains off. Learn Yoruba, heck, I will even teach you the language and show you how to tie iro.

She can only do that AFTER she has learnt the ropes from the refugee girl. . . I mean obviously, she isn't doing something right, at the moment.

Please add me to the list of Yoruba teachers. I know a few phrase I use for my [b]"My Husband, My God, My Life"[/b]Parody.

Oko mi, Olowo ori mi, se kin gbe ese mi so ke?

Oko mi, Opolo mi, e jo so fun ni gba ti ebi ban pa mi.

Oko mi, puppet master mi, se kin joko abi kin di de?

I will even send her the remix tape I made

Ewo gele yaya lo ri aya ti o ni opolo
E ya ni o je, ki ni jaye
Ewo gele yaya lo ri aya ti ko ni opolo

I'll even teach her how to dance the sugomu dance sef. . . not that I know what it is but I figure it won't be that hard, I mean all you have to do is pretend you don't have a brain and then try to dance.

Chei! I never thot the day will come where I will be telling someone to say this outside the context of a joke. Life is indeed full of surprises.

@sisikill.

Dear, don't you think you overdoing it already? If you're married and it's working, good for you. If you're not, why don't you shut the hell up and wait till you get married.

Rotflmao! Over doing what?

Oh yeah, which one keeps me out of not having an input running. . . being married or not?

Sisikill, stop o. I do not want to share my teacher's salary with you. So, thanks but no thanks (that reminds me of another bull dog with lipstick, make I no go there). She can't afford to have more than one teacher. As for her going to the refugee to take lessons, I seriously support that idea. While you are there, may I also suggest party? I bet your husband will never leave you. Though to anyone that have, half a brain, he is already gone. But no o, not to you Tara, fight with everything you have.

N-guage, seriously, you need to loosen up. The good book said, love your neighbor as yourself, not more than yourself. No matter how much love she thinks she has for the guy, the guy does not want her. I don't think anyone needs more writing on the wall to know that. And no sir, getting married doesn't turn you into a didirun, unless you were a didirin to start with.

Jeez, Nigerians surely don't have any sense of humor.