jaybee3:

Some people can't function well with unstructured planning.

Absolutely nothing wrong with delegating responsibilities when it's not like it's for selfish reasons.

I honestly don't understand why people complain about delegating responsibilities. It's an effective way of getting things done. It's really as simple as that. You empower someone to take ownership and in turn derive joy from delivering consistently and on time.

Now this delegation issue is not restricted to women alone cos I know some African men frown at such as well especially when it has to do with helping around the house.

Marriage is a team work and everyone has to pull their weight in a structured way in other to achieve desired results.

aisha2: The poster is the one who used the word "delegate" ohhhhHhhhhhh. I am not sure he called her and said I delegate soup matters to you. If she had said lets discuss it more or let me cover some other area then I would agree its about the word delegation but it seemed more like a discussion where she has vehemently refused to contribute

kingviny:

So on point. He spoke kindly to her o when he brought the issue up. He has never been the autocratic type, instead he wants to carry her along, he wants to make her significant in the running of their home. He did not use the word DELEGATE . But even if he had, that shouldnt be an issue for an humble soul?

cutiemoi:


What you mentioned above is something every girlfriend or wife will do, the difference here is, you didn't call your ex or wife at a point and told them "because you work, I am assigning this role to you" rather you knew you have to provide for your family and having seen your efforts in caring for the family they can't afford to close their eyes if something to be done. In the case of the OP, they are not even married yet and he has started delegating roles.

Amhappy: Pls tell you friend to also share bills for children school fees. His wife pay for 2,he pay for the other 2. Make his wife pay nepa bills,security,waste disposal,fuel while he pays house rent etc. Make him buy fruits and the wife vegetables.

madan: the Op is the person in question, he wants the lady to handle owo obe I.E handle the soup and stew they will be eating when married. Isnt this funny? After the lady has assisted him in fixing up the home, she bought some of the things in the home and still wants to do more not minding hw little she is earning. this lady isnt a demanding type, cos she has never asked what the Op cannot provide, she has bn so understanding and loving inspite the financial status of this guy, she stayed with him. When he brought up this soup issue, the lady told him nt to worry cos she would manage and balance whatever they have. If it comes to the point to add, she would definitely add up to make it okay. bt he insisted she must be in charge of soup and stew cos that comes up frequently. Is this right? The woman should be in charge of Owo Obe cos hw wants to buy foodstuff in the home. I rest my case.

madan: the Op is the person in question, he wants the lady to handle owo obe I.E handle the soup and stew they will be eating when married. Isnt this funny? After the lady has assisted him in fixing up the home, she bought some of the things in the home and still wants to do more not minding hw little she is earning. this lady isnt a demanding type, cos she has never asked what the Op cannot provide, she has bn so understanding and loving inspite the financial status of this guy, she stayed with him. When he brought up this soup issue, the lady told him nt to worry cos she would manage and balance whatever they have. If it comes to the point to add, she would definitely add up to make it okay. bt he insisted she must be in charge of soup and stew cos that comes up frequently. Is this right? The woman should be in charge of Owo Obe cos hw wants to buy foodstuff in the home. I rest my case.

madan: she bought is handling some of the things to furnish the home already

Sophyrocks: This is getting interesting. #Spreading mat as quickly as possible#

madan: why not say the truth. Just like you delegated the major things in furnishing the home and she assisted

madan: she bought is handling some of the things to furnish the home already

Godmystrength: Joining you this time around.

egopersonified: Madan and kingviny, I suggest you both get on the same page, most couples have the same financial issues, dont let this be a barrier to your r/ship. Like aisha said, u both need to communicate and probably kingviny wants to know exactly what u can take care of so he can focus on the others. Madan, pls privately analize your salary and determine what you can put on the table every month without fail. Let k.viny know the amount, then you both can decide to wrap it around some expenses so he can focus on the others. I would advice u both stop posting any replies and just read people's comments before this thread becomes the devourer of your r/ship.

aisha2: This una relationship get other issues sha. Communication or lack of it a huge one:

kingv:

Is it fair for modern ladies to want to be traditional when it comes to family finance and Kardasian when it comes to romantic treatment?

donpeey22: This is the same question i have been asking since and no one has been able to answer. In this modern age when men and women compete equally in all spheres of life, i think it is grossly unreasonable for a woman to still think of a man as the 'natural provider' like a lady here put it. I know some ladies reading this post would qualify me as 'uncaring' for daring to ask this crucial question which most modern Nigerian men have on their lips but are too shy to ask. But i don't give a damn! I'm just a realist who likes saying it as it is.

kingviny:

ONLY THE TRUTH CAN SET ONE FREE BROTHER ! SAY IT PLEASE .

How can a man plan based on discretionary support? well, Aisha has said it all. A word is enough . . .

aisha2:

It is simply for better planning not with bad motives. When he knows what he should focus on and you do too it makes the home easier to run. Communication is key, some people want to take it as it comes some want it on pen and paper, I am a pen and paper person, makes life easier and more coordinated, I guess your fiance is too. It is better to resolve such issues before they become bigger problems.

aisha2:

No use Aisha settle fight ohhhhhhhhhh, you guys need to talk seriously, Aisha is not supporting anybody oh, from madams post there is clearly a communication gap, WORK ON IT