Emmalot121: Maybe you were not opportuned to attend a good secondary school or because as a lady, you lack common sense(assuming) . Let me teach you some maths; Cococandy said men = women , therefore it is mathematically correct to say cococandy is a man, isn't it? Then Mrs Name Calling, tell me why a man cannot marry a woman. This simple maths is the reason for the ever skyrocketing number of lesbians in Europe and America.

50calibre:

You're bleating like a sheep!!

After saying all these nonsense, you're going to wait for a man to come and marry you, if no one comes, you remain single


And when a man comes to marry you, you'd abandon everything & follow him, you'd drop your name & adopt his, you'd become his possession and when the time comes, you'd spread your legs wide for him, 9 months later, you pop out little humans who will bear his name.

Looool seems like men & women are not so equal, are they?

carefreewannabe:

Have you read my CV to know where I grew up?



I have never said that no girl gets preferential treatment.



So? Girls should also be encouraged to make money and support their families.



No doubt.



My opinions are NOT only based on what I read on this forum but you won't deny that this forum reflects many cultural issues.

Isn't it true that many women live in their HUSBAND'S house?
Isn't it true that a husband can bring in another wife to live with them without her consent? He's the boss, she has to be submissive and it's his house. Yeah!
Isn't it true that women are constantly and repeatedly told that their value decreases with age?
Isn't it true that divorced women are stigmatized even if they left a violent husband?
Isn't it true that women are made to believe that they have to be tolerant of male infidelity even if they risk being infected with various STDs?
Isn't it true that women are expected to obey their husbands?
Isn't it true that women are kind of sold into marriage?
Isn't it true that some Nigerian politicians justify child marriage, in which young girls have to marry old men?
Isn't it true that women are reduced to what they look like?
Isn't it true that women are told what they have to do with their lives PRIMARILY? Be a mother and wife?

babygirlfl:

Was there really any need for the insult?

okotv: Holy Spirit and Feminism... a beg don't blaspheme

DailyNews: awww!!! This response touched me!! This girl must be good! Pls 50calibre, refrain n pls apologise to her pls.

babygirlfl:

The secondary school that I attended taught me that communication is key. I was made to understand that I do not need to insult or call names to put my point across. The same secondary school taught me enough maths to do a course in university that involves maths in a country where you do not need to pay your way and still finish with a very good result. Now that secondary school is what I call good.

Common sense tells me not to assume a whole gender lacks common sense and also that communication without insult is best.

The last part is not for me. Mrs Name calling will have to answer that.

babygirlfl:

Thanks. It was not actually me that he insulted. It is just sad that people cannot have discussions on nairaland without insult.

Misogynist2014: Will you shut up! Who the fück do you think you are talking to? He is a man, his words are final, you have to obey. No one cares about what u think. Who has been deluding you that men are same as women, who? God has given us authority, its our moral right to integrate you guys to the world we toiled to build. If you are so crazy about equality, go and preach to ISIS. No matter how much you try to degrade the position of a homemaker, God prefers it to a business worth millions. Go the hell you came from and stop confusing women of value. #loveHomemakers

cococandy: Smh. Yea it must really be evil to want to be given the same rights as men.
Nna biko swerve commot for my front. I take God beg you

50calibre:

You're bleating like a sheep!!

After saying all these nonsense, you're going to wait for a man to come and marry you, if no one comes, you remain single


And when a man comes to marry you, you'd abandon everything & follow him, you'd drop your name & adopt his, you'd become his possession and when the time comes, you'd spread your legs wide for him, 9 months later, you pop out little humans who will bear his name.

Looool seems like men & women are not so equal, are they?

50calibre:

You're bleating like a sheep!!

After saying all these nonsense, you're going to wait for a man to come and marry you, if no one comes, you remain single


And when a man comes to marry you, you'd abandon everything & follow him, you'd drop your name & adopt his, you'd become his possession and when the time comes, you'd spread your legs wide for him, 9 months later, you pop out little humans who will bear his name.

Looool seems like men & women are not so equal, are they?

babygirlfl:

I think you quoted the wrong person. Please quote the right person next time.

Kidash: You said it all...imagine because am from the feminine gender am been seen as a weaker verssel and been told that i have no control over resourses,power,opinion,even my personal welfare..how painful to sit back and watch a male gender take the little that is mine "minister of women affairs as of then"...what does he know that i pass through..at the end of the month he gives me sanitry towels...but dose it end there..NOOO...cause am a female then am a subject to be laid on every time NO...cause am a female then i dont get to vote and be voted for NO...cause am a female then i dont get to go to school while the opposite sex goes No am been left at home cause the opposite sex thinks thats my aim of existance.....since all these rules where made by human the also could be change by human...#femminist am proud to be#.....

DailyNews: First of all, let me apologise for assuming that u didn't grow up in Nigeria, my bad. Now to your points.

Of course every Nigerian family encourages their female child to be productive, and that's awesome!

Yeah, to an extent the opinions here reflect the reality of the society but to a very insignificant degree. We have over 150million Nigerians, and only 1million users on nairaland, and if we screen the 1million well, it may be 100thousand real users or less.

Yes its true many (in fact most married women) live in their husband's house and that's the original plan of God. Adam owned garden of Eden after creation- God gave Adam the power n authority to own the world...so garden of Eden is Adam's house or home before Eve arrived. Eve didn't go and live in another house, she lived in Adam's house- garden of Eden...which by virtue of marital union has become her house too.

So carefee, a woman living in her husbands house isn't a taboo but the plan of God.

Yes, it is true that some uncultured husbands can bring in another woman into his marital home, but then, family, church, etc abhors it and will stand by the woman...better still, the woman can still file for a divorce if she doesn't like it, and of course she will get justice if she asks for it in a formal court of law.

Note: some women in Nigeria too bring in other men into their husbands house, especially when the woman is the breadwinner of the family, so its not about Nigeria, its about who pays the piper...which isn't right, but that's why every woman ought to find a way to be earning her own money before getting married...isn't that y their parents and siblings sent them to school to acquire good degrees and skills Instead, most prefer the easy way because they are lazy or scared to face the societal competition to make money

Yes, it is true...and its not just in Nigeria. Its a natural making not Nigerian. A woman approaches menopause as she grows older towards 40yrs and above...so they mean that in terms of child bearing...can anyone tell Alison Dieziani that she's irrelevant cos she's old Can anyone tell Genevieve Nnaji that she's irrelevant cos she's approaching 40 and still single

Can anyone tell Iyabo Obasanjo that

So it all depends on the woman in question. And also in America that I know, they discriminate against old people, fat women, etc...if u doubt me, pls make a real life research or ask around.

Divorced women are stigmatised It also depends on the woman that was divorced...its not a Nigerian issue. The whole world frowns at divorce...I mean sane world...well disciplined American families hate divorce...Hilary Clinton didn't divorce Bill Clinton...Israel hate divorce...divorce isn't nice...and I am sure if a Nigerian woman divorces her violent husband, her family will stand by her.

I remember vividly when I was a teen, my dad and my mom had a little issue, I can't really remember what caused their disagreement, and guess what Without wasting time, my mom packed her loads and mine (the youngest child) and off to her parents place.

Her brothers were mad at my father...her mom supported her, they welcomed us like royals...I enjoyed my one-week stay there


My dad came begging, he was chased away he came back with his friends, later his family n kinsmen to beg before I n my mom were released to him so my sister, its not abt Nigeria but abt family and the woman involved.

No one forces any woman to remain with a cheating husband, it is the women that stay on their own without being compelled to.

Child marriage That's in the northern Nigeria dominated by muslims...so its not a Nigerian issue but a religious issue. So feminists should campaign against such religion that encourages such practice and not Nigeria

Bible teachings ought to be the foundation of every marriage that wants to stand the test of time.

And what did the Bible said It said, husbands love your wives, wives, obey/submit to your husbands! I didn't write the Bible, it is the same white people that brought us the good news that's now turning against it, isn't it madness

Look at them encouraging gay marriage, and they call it human right or freedom of expression, isn't that stupidity ma

Pls let the Bible be your guide and not all these confused white people jareh

Misogynist2014: This fööl still does not know the difference btw equal human rights and equality, even after a lot of men toiled to explain it. Cocoa and candy, do you know where wisdom comes from, tell me, even if it is in the deepest of sees and well into the earth, tell me; that I may get some for you.

Kidash: You said it all...imagine because am from the feminine gender am been seen as a weaker verssel and been told that i have no control over resourses,power,opinion,even my personal welfare..how painful to sit back and watch a male gender take the little that is mine "minister of women affairs as of then"...what does he know that i pass through..at the end of the month he gives me sanitry towels...but dose it end there..NOOO...cause am a female then am a subject to be laid on every time NO...cause am a female then i dont get to vote and be voted for NO...cause am a female then i dont get to go to school while the opposite sex goes No am been left at home cause the opposite sex thinks thats my aim of existance.....since all these rules where made by human the also could be change by human...#femminist am proud to be#.....

cococandy: Ok. I am a fool.
I hope you're happy. Do you have any more curses for me?. I can accept some more if it will make you happy.

carefreewannabe:

Never mind.



No, not every Nigerian family but ok.



I can't help but remember when you quoted 10 or 15 tabloids to prove that men in the West cheat as much as Nigerian men. How many examples of questionable sources have you quoted and how many men are there in the West?

Anyway, I get your point.



This is your personal belief and interpretation of the Bible.

And even though, Europeans brought Christianity to Africa, they don't go around and justify that women are guests in their own houses with the story of creation.

This is one of the reasons why African women think their Western counterparts are better off.



This is your interpretation of the Bible.

I could also say that the paradise that was given to Adam was not properly taken care of by Adam and because Adam lost it, he is not entitled to be the owner of it anymore. At the end of the day, both Adam and Eve were chased away from the paradise. This is just another possible interpretation to show you that the Bible can be read as it suits our needs.




So you call these husbands uncultured even though some of them also refer to the Bible? Can you now see how dangerous it is to use the Bible as the basis of reasoning when it comes to gender issues?

By the way, if the woman files for divorce, where will she go if the house / paradise belongs to the husband?
And how many Nigerian women have the means to fight a husband in court?

And what will relatives tell her? Be submissive? He is a man?



How many stories are known to you in which the woman brings in a second husband?

Let's not deceive ourselves.



There are plenty of comments here on NL that bash Genevieve for not being married. Plenty of people look down on her for exactly this reason.

Women in Germany also approach and go through menopause, yet they are not constantly and repeatedly told that they MUST marry and that their worth depends on their looks.



People do.



Let us, PLEASE, talk about Nigeria and Germany, if possible or else we will end up talking about celebrities who live quite different lives.

Discrimination takes place everywhere but living in Germany gives me the comfort of NOT having to worry about age. Why? Because the ordinary man here has a relationship with a woman, in which they are both partners. I don't see many old men here, going round and showing off their money and their trophy wives.

I am not saying that there are no elderly rich men with young wives but it is rather uncommon. And men expect more from a woman than just nice looks, much more.

When people divorce or become widowers, they rather go for people their age.



Nobody likes divorce and nobody dreams of it but a Nigerian divorced woman will suffer from a greater stigma than a divorced Nigerian man. This is the whole point.



What does it prove?



The fact that the house is his, the fact that she will find it difficult to work when the kids are little and society's stigma force many women to remain in abusive marriages.



Is it not Nigeria?



This is your personal belief.



No, it's called evolution.

White people question the Bible like Africans questioned some other cultural practices in the past, female circumcision, the killing of twins etc.

I would love to keep religion out of it.



This is an issue that I don't care about at all.



Forget it!

My God given brain is my guide and Jesus is a person I admire and this is it.

Bottom line is that MANY African women feel that they are treated UNJUSTLY.
You can deny it as much as you want but I think it would be helpful to FIRST put yourself in their position instead of claiming that what they say they experience is not real or even the opposite of it.

A very good teacher of mine once told me that to understand something we must NOT judge it.

Listen and try to see things from the female perspective. Imagine what it would be like to be a woman. The good and the bad sides of it. It is not easy for a man but you can do it. And then ask yourself the following question: Do you want your daughters and sisters to be treated like inferior properties who expire, lose their value plus dignity day by day, the older they get, the more they achieve, at home or at work or for the sake of society?

carefreewannabe:

Have you read my CV to know where I grew up?



I have never said that no girl gets preferential treatment.



So? Girls should also be encouraged to make money and support their families.



No doubt.



My opinions are NOT only based on what I read on this forum but you won't deny that this forum reflects many cultural issues.

Isn't it true that many women live in their HUSBAND'S house?
Isn't it true that a husband can bring in another wife to live with them without her consent? He's the boss, she has to be submissive and it's his house. Yeah!
Isn't it true that women are constantly and repeatedly told that their value decreases with age?
Isn't it true that divorced women are stigmatized even if they left a violent husband?
Isn't it true that women are made to believe that they have to be tolerant of male infidelity even if they risk being infected with various STDs?
Isn't it true that women are expected to obey their husbands?
Isn't it true that women are kind of sold into marriage?
Isn't it true that some Nigerian politicians justify child marriage, in which young girls have to marry old men?
Isn't it true that women are reduced to what they look like?
Isn't it true that women are told what they have to do with their lives PRIMARILY? Be a mother and wife?

Misogynist2014: Don't let me descend on you, If I do, you will hate yourself. #CoolingDown

babygirlfl:

The secondary school that I attended taught me that communication is key. I was made to understand that I do not need to insult or call names to put my point across. The same secondary school taught me enough maths to do a course in university that involves maths in a country where you do not need to pay your way and still finish with a very good result. Now that secondary school is what I call good.

Common sense tells me not to assume a whole gender lacks common sense and also that communication without insult is best.

The last part is not for me. Mrs Name calling will have to answer that.

Misogynist2014: I'm in no way cursing you: its the truth . Just stop this show of shame. God bless you, I'm not your husband, else, I will neglect you and marry more wives, who cares? Its a win win situation. Our divorce laws in Nigeria unlike the west favors no one(only if you are rich enough to stand alone). Who wants a militant divorcee as wife?

carefreewannabe:

cococandy: Sort your issues. Misogynist. Leave me out of it

cococandy: Smh. Yea it must really be evil to want to be given the same rights as men.
Nna biko swerve commot for my front. I take God beg you

Misogynist2014: I won't leave you, unless you stop this show of shame.

Misogynist2014: That you are very stupid is an understatement. You keep using the pictures of sadists to pass information.You are lucky you are not my wife.
What do women understand by oppression? I guess I don't. You write babble, stupid statements(even calling women living peacefully in their husband's house oppression ) The fact is that you can't reason well, I can't waste my time on you. Let me refer you to this link http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/myth-of-female-oppression/

carefreewannabe:

@bold

Oh, yes. I am very happy, too.

okotv: equal rights and feminism are two different entities...don't confuse your self woman