I just got this news. This happened to a family friend. They live in lekki. The man doesnt go to church but the wife goes to winners chapel ota. They had their first baby in january this year.

The man has been telling his wife to stop going to winners chapel from lekki. That it is very far. He said he wasn't stopping her from going to church as long as its within the area. The wife didn't listen. He even called family meeting but she refused

Unfortunately two months ago on her way to church on a sunday. The woman and her baby was involved in a car accident and the baby died. She was rushed to the hospital for treatment. Luckily she survived but unable to walk.

Ever since she has been in the hospital he hasn't visited her and said that until his baby comes alive. He doesn't even want her back all because he felt the woman didn't listen to him. Her aged parents all the way from ogunstate are the ones seeing to her medical and feeding money.

Everybody has been begging this man ehn. He is still adamant. Is it the woman's fault that she wanted to worship in her church? Why can't the man forgive her? She is also grieving the loss of their baby too.

Really pathetic story, if she had listened
Women sometimes in a bid to defend equality / rights tend to loose far more. If this had happened around the area this would not have been an issue.

Wow, what a sad one

I'm sure even the lady would have told herself she should have listened to her husband

The deed has been done, the man should forgive her.Sure she had learnt her lesson in a hard way

The man has a defence storyline which is''she didn't listen/obey me''......You didn't give full details as in how they were (financially-does the man have a job or is the woman the breadwinner?,mutually-were they having any problem apart from the church issue?) before the incident...Some women just wouldn't see reasons,she disobeyed him..
The man is angry,pray he forgives her




Funny enough,doesn't the church teach submission and obedience?

Its easy for people to say forgive, but have you considered what transpired before this accident? The fights, arguments and family meetings over this issue but the stubborn woman insisted on going to Otta as if that is where Jesus dwells.
Now her stubbornness has killed their baby and probably maimed her. How will that man feel loosing his only child because his Wife was too hard-headed to listen to reason.
Well, I don't think that marriage will ever be the same because the Man will hardly forgive, will always remember and if the wife doesn't walk, well your guess is as good as mine.

The man is right on this one, the husband's suggestion to attend a church closer to home was very reasonable, yet she chose to be stiff headed. Now the unexpected has happened, the man should play it any way he deems fit.

tragic
May God help them and all of us

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++


Submission submission submission... that arcane elusive concept.. rears its head once again

Why is it easy for some women to subvert their husband claiming they are following divine MoGs
The husband is foremost the spiritual authority of the home
God asked Adam why he let the woman go astray

The man is responsible.. but what do i know

1 Cor 7. 39a

"The wife is bound by the law as long as her husband liveth;"

Odilafta: The man has a defence storyline which is''she didn't listen/obey me''......You didn't give full details as in how they were (financially-does the man have a job or is the woman the breadwinner?,mutually-were they having any problem apart from the church issue?) before the incident...
You should be praying for them,because the devil(anger) has come to root in the man

What does the devil have to do with the man? Was the devil also with the man when he kept warning and pleading for her to relocate to a closer church? Was the devil also with the man when his wife defied reason and was foolishly stubborn? Well so much for her stubbornness, let her church members at Otta come and take care of her.

The man is being selfish. And he's slowly ripping apart the little left behind.

See, one can't begin to imagine the guilt and anguish traumatizing his wife. I mean she's definitely blaming herself and she's remorseful. It wasn't her will at all for this to happen. She lost a baby too and she's unfit. Am I the only one seeing that?...

Though on a clear note too, I'd agree she was irresponsible and stubborn. But nevertheless it's an accident. It could happen to anyone. Now isn't the time to point fingers. They ought to grief and console each other together. What's Life all about as a couple?...

Some people take things too far and this wife was probably trying to prove 'you can't tell me how to worship MY God' like her God can only be found in Otta now things have gone south very tragic. I don't even know what to say to the man about forgiveness but it can be done.The child was her child too and I am sure she is already going through so much emotionally as it is.The man has to look at it from the perspective that accidents are accidents(they are not planned or expected) the accident could have occurred on lekki expressway for him to come to some sort of forgiveness.no mother actually wants to lose their child.

diegs:

Everybody has been begging this man ehn. He is still adamant. Is it the woman's fault that she wanted to worship in her church? Why can't the man forgive her? She is also grieving the loss of their baby too.

Like a Yoruba adage, the man should have first pursue the fox before coming to deal with the chicken. He should at least sympathise with his wife to recover from the accident.

Meanwhile, if the woman understands her bible well, she would have known she was only going to church to waste her time since her husband didn't support her inter-city travel.

A lot of women respects their Pastors/Bishops/Prophets more than their husbands which shouldn't be. Your husband is the first priest of your home. If you wants a good priest in your home, be diligent enough to marry a good man.

Winners should foot the bills and find her a new husband. Personally, I wouldn't want a woman who doesn't listen to me. It means she consider me as irrelevant.

What is difficult in getting a church closer to you? Isnt it for safety sake? Her husband meant well for him to suggest that. Too bad.

Odilafta: The man has a defence storyline which is''she didn't listen/obey me''......You didn't give full details as in how they were (financially-does the man have a job or is the woman the breadwinner?,mutually-were they having any problem apart from the church issue?) before the incident...Some women just wouldn't see reasons,she disobeyed him..
The man is angry,pray he forgives her


Funny enough,doesn't the church teach submission and obedience?

The man has a job. He is working for one of these oil servicing firm but the woman is a teacher. She was said to be attending winners because according to her she waited for 5years to have a child and she said it was because she was attending winners and shiloh

The man is just so stubborn despite all pleas. I really feel for the woman

Am sorry I have to say this,serves the woman right.

The man's action is justified,when a woman is adamant,whatever the outcome,she should bear it.

From lekki to ota every sunday because of church is. Nonsense with a baby,God isn't hostile,and difficult as people paint him.

Serves her right.

The lady was wrong!

If u dnt listen to me then u ll bear d consequences of ur actions alone

If I am d man d woman is in a hot soup for killing my baby due to her senselessness. She shld b gettin ready to hit her fathers house bc d marriage may ve ended with her killin my baby.

It ll b difficult to forgive her for killin my baby. D man is d head of d family n he shld ve d final say on his family matters.

This accident could have happened anywhere.

carefreewannabe: This accident could have happened anywhere.

Gbam!

It must be tragic and heart-rending to lose ones firstborn/only child in such circumstances and almost lose your wife, who, in any event is seriously injured. And I can’t even begin to imagine what’s going through the wife' mind at this time?

I’m hoping this is mostly part of the husbands grieving process and not a position he will maintain indefinitely. If they weren’t rock solid before – and it doesn’t sound like they were – this could end badly.


Husband & Wife:
From a Christian point of view, I always stress the need for husbands and wives to be in mutual accord and to strive to overcome anything that mitigates against it – and it’s usually selfish desire, pride or stubbornness that does!

The wife should have acceded to her husbands request. The more so, in that he wasn’t forbidding her from actually going to church.

I know of an instance where the wife was “doing something in her village” – unknown to the husband. As in this case, she suffered a serious injury in a car crash, at which point everything unraveled.

The lady is still wheelchair-bound till today. The marriage? Long over and the husband has moved on. Two children keep them "tied", but the relationship is fractious. It’s so sad.

Please, please, please, spouses, stand united. It brings benefits. I actually believe God blesses committed marriages of those who don’t even seek Him. Again I plead with you on this, agree as one.

Church:
Biblically, church was always local. As such it is community. I have never understood this "journeying to worship" – one of the very things that Christ died to release us from.

People leave one part of London and travel considerable distances due to feeling at home or loved in a particular church or to be fed by a particular pastor. The Sunday-Sunday pilgrimage of black peeps across London- and I suspect elsewhere - is akin to the migration of the wildebeest.

It effectively ghettoises the church and means very few actually make or leave a Christian imprint in their local communities. Churchianity aka organised religion. To what end?

I hope they come through this as a couple.

TV

Does d man have a right to be angry? YES
was d woman stubborn? YES.
Bt in d end, forgivenesss is paramount. Though its very painful as d man, if he can forgive, he shld.
As right as it may seem, for dose of us saying it serves her right, if we are to fully suffer for d consequences of our actions/inactions, how many of us will truely stand? Wat's life without forgiving others?

What a shame. Won't be surprised to hear Winners church leadership attribute this to her husband's lack of spirituality. And the wife will be encouraged to attend even more services, be involved in more church work and give even more of her income as offering. I'm sure she would have told her Satellite or Zonal pastor about hubby's stance and she'd have been told to ignore him, it's the devil speaking. I could go on and on. Funny thing is she might not have learnt her lesson. Sorry for the husband.

TV01:
Church:
Biblically, church was always local. As such it is community. I have never understood this "journeying to worship" – one of the very things that Christ died to release us from.

People leave one part of London and travel considerable distances due to feeling at home or loved in a particular church or to be fed by a particular pastor. The Sunday-Sunday pilgrimage of black peeps across London- and I suspect elsewhere - is akin to the migration of the wildebeest.

It effectively ghettoises the church and means very few actually make or leave a Christian imprint in their local communities. Churchianity aka organised religion. To what end?

I hope they come through this as a couple.

TV

I disagree!
There are churches and there are CHURCHES! I'll rather stay at home than go to a church I ain't comfortable with. If I have to travel miles to feel alive in a church, then, SO BE IT!

Few months ago, I had to travel down to Nigeria and a few other places, I just couldn't deal with all the churches I attended throughout those months. There was a particular Sunday I was this close to going back home mid-service, and this was even the same denomination with my church!

Sometimes, it takes the good girl (scratch that, boy) in me to not start criticizing and analyzing some Pastors while they're preaching, I definitely won't go back to such a place.

damiso: Some people take things too far and this wife was probably trying to prove 'you can't tell me how to worship MY God' like her God can only be found in Otta now things have gone south very tragic. I don't even know what to say to the man about forgiveness but it can be done.The child was her child too and I am sure she is already going through so much emotionally as it is.The man has to look at it from the perspective that accidents are accidents(they are not planned or expected) the accident could have occurred on lekki expressway for him to come to some sort of forgiveness.no mother actually wants to lose their child.

I agree with the bolded. It was an accident and it could have happened at anytime. The wife is also grieving and the man should be thankful that his wife did not die as well. If she had died, is he saying he wouldn't even care? I am sure he would; so there is always something to thank God for. I am sure the woman has learnt a hard lesson.

The lesson is that marriage is not a power tussle and God is everywhere. I hate apportioning blame but in this case, the woman should have found a closer church just because her husband was strongly against her travelling to Ota. I don't think that was too hard to do. They didnt need to go through what they are going through now, if you ask me.

Nashville:
I agree with the bolded. It was an accident and it could have happened at anytime. The wife is also grieving and the man should be thankful that his wife did not die as well. If she had died, is he saying he wouldn't even care? I am sure he would; so there is always something to thank God for. I am sure the woman has learnt a hard lesson.
The lesson is that marriage is not a power tussle and God is everywhere. I hate apportioning blame but in this case, the woman should have found a closer church just because her husband was strongly against her travelling to Ota. I don't think that was too hard to do. They didnt need to go through what they are going through now, if you ask me.

I am not too sure of winners structure(so don't know if they have branches) but some people have a branch of their denomination or church in their neighbourhood but insist on going to their HQ just because they must listen to the GO every Sunday.I know someone personally who lived in Ogba and had a branch of MFM on their street but still travelled to Onike every Sunday and Wednesday for service.

TV01:
People leave one part of London and travel considerable distances due to feeling at home or loved in a particular church or to be fed by a particular pastor. The Sunday-Sunday pilgrimage of black peeps across London- and I suspect elsewhere - is akin to the migration of the wildebeest.


TV

The weekly sojourn to Otta is excruciating, to say the least. People spend 6, 7, 8 hours to and from church, I kid you not. So, they have to be up at say 3, 4 am to get to church by 6, 7am. Gpoing back home could take between 2 to 5 to 6 hours. Insane.

Yomieluv: Am sorry I have to say this,serves the woman right.

The man's action is justified,when a woman is adamant,whatever the outcome,she should bear it.

From lekki to ota every sunday because of church is. Nonsense with a baby,God isn't hostile,and difficult as people paint him.

Serves her right.

On top the fact that the wife did not listen to hubby?

We are not talking car was snatched or wallet stolen

A whole child was lost + wife almost gone.

That is too harsh

freshdude2: The weekly sojourn to Otta is excruciating, to say the least. People spend 6, 7, 8 hours to and from church, I kid you not. So, they have to be up at say 3, 4 am to get to church by 6, 7am. Gpoing back home could take between 2 to 5 to 6 hours. Insane.

Ah!

To be honest, I'm not the most clued-up person about the geography of the SW - although I do know that Ota is in Ogun State - but whatever the distance, up to 8 hours I really don't understand that. And on a day that actually signifies rest?


TV

alutacontinua:

I disagree!
There are churches and there are CHURCHES! I'll rather stay at home than go to a church I ain't comfortable with. If I have to travel miles to feel alive in a church, then, SO BE IT!

Few months ago, I had to travel down to Nigeria and a few other places, I just couldn't deal with all the churches I attended throughout those months. There was a particular Sunday I was this close to going back home mid-service, and this was even the same denomination with my church!

Sometimes, it takes the good girl (scratch that, boy) in me to not start criticizing and analyzing some Pastors while they're preaching, I definitely won't go back to such a place.

Why won't you disagree - when you are still grappling with your own biological sex !

And why aren't I surprised that you equate church with "pulpit-led" preaching. And talk like it's about the preacher not the person of Christ?

One - infinitesimally brief - encounter with the Risen Lord, and all the preaching of men will be so much ringing in your ears and their words like dried termite mound.

Free me and I'll free you, I have not the inclination and you do not possess the grasp!

Church - it's not where you go, it's who you are.


TV

TV01:

Why won't you disagree - when you are still grappling with your own biological sex !

And why aren't I surprised that you equate church with "pulpit-led" preaching. And talk like it's about the preacher not the person of Christ?

One - infinitesimally brief - encounter with the Risen Lord, and all the preaching of men will be so much ringing in your ears and their words like dried termite mound.

Free me and I'll free you, I have not the inclination and you do not possess the grasp!

Church - it's not where you go, it's who you are.


TV

You know I seriously stay away from arguments and epistles on NL but one out of one million times, there are lessons to learn on here. And the few times you see me say something serious, it's not me tryna show how much debating skills I possess or how insulting I can be, it's just me tryna learn something.

So, you can quit taking shots and let us discuss....can you?

I really do not understand the kind of God we worship nowadays.Is it not God omnipresent?

If we truly know God,then things like this will be avoided.Why make a journey till infinity just to seek the face of Lord?Even in the comfort of your home,he is there with us.

I think the husband should temper justice with mercy and I hope this will serve a big lesson to women who think being stubborn is actually a right.

diegs:



The man has a job. He is working for one of these oil servicing firm but the woman is a teacher. She was said to be attending winners because according to her she waited for 5years to have a child and she said it was because she was attending winners and shiloh

The man is just so stubborn despite all pleas. I really feel for the woman

I understand where wifey was coming from though

Hubby not a christian is telling wifey not to go to a church she received her miracle.

She was not seeing the hubby's POV of safety

It is well