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Why Do Women Always Claim They Have Been Used And Dumped Once A Guy Leaves Them? - Romance (9) - Nairaland

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Re: Why Do Women Always Claim They Have Been Used And Dumped Once A Guy Leaves Them? by Nobody: 11:12am On Nov 18, 2014
19naia:
I will enjoy every relationship for each day it last.. Every moment of it i will enjoy until it ends.. Even if it only last a day... If it was a rough separation, i will recover eventually and remember more often the good enjoyable times.. I will even consider the bad times and ponder them for what more i can learn that i could not see so clearly when i was so immersed in my perspective of that moment..

The idea of being used and discarded is for people who never entered the relationship with a focus to enjoy the relationship for every moment it lasted... Even if the relatioship is for a life time, partners wil eventually die and part way still.. Then what? Call out to your dead spouse's spirit for why they used you in life and then abandoned you on earth to go and enjoy in heaven?

Waste no time about enjoying who you have there, or else be busy enjoying yourself while single... Enjoy yourslef and them in what way you can, because they will be gone one day or another. If you stay alone single with yourself, enjoy yourself ,because one day also you will have to dump this life and move on... Dont feel used, feel what you enjoyed....

I dont enter relationship any way unless my heart feels enjoyment there calling me.. And when i follow it, i apreciate it with a heart and mind that i will enjoy it for however long it lasts and let it be when it must be done.. Then i will carry my memory of enjoyment with me and go and smile when i close my eyes and recollect... I smile still today for memories of enjoyed times with ladies from years ago and despite none of the relationship lasted.... Even rough times are ok when the pain is done and inside that there are enjoyable memories to have... I dont fear being sad or angry, i feel it and let it speak to me and after i have heard its message, there is enjoyment to be had about it...


I like the way you see life easy breezy.
Re: Why Do Women Always Claim They Have Been Used And Dumped Once A Guy Leaves Them? by Neroanna(f): 11:13am On Nov 18, 2014
will1am:

Gracias cool
U sound like a red pill reader.... cheesy
will1am:

Gracias cool
U sound like a red pill reader....

1 Like

Re: Why Do Women Always Claim They Have Been Used And Dumped Once A Guy Leaves Them? by NOLONGTIN1(m): 11:14am On Nov 18, 2014
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Re: Why Do Women Always Claim They Have Been Used And Dumped Once A Guy Leaves Them? by NOLONGTIN1(m): 11:14am On Nov 18, 2014
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cupidhero:
OP God will bless you,i have asked a million girls this question and they have never given me a good answer. my ex GF wanted to sexually relate with me but declined and gave stupid reasons. imagine a dude running away from such opportunity. she had no idea i was only doing it cos of what or how she might feel like after we seperate. you can't tell where this things are heading,you might just hit a rock anyday. This particular comments from these ladies is why i stay away from so many relationships i could have had. give me a green light and watch me break traffic laws with my space car. ladies always feel used,dumped and whatever anytime we say it is over. i tire for una o.


Really, are you telling me you refused your GF offer of sex to protect her? because you didn't want her to claim that you used and dumped her.

Wait oooooo, You did that to protect her and not because of d many sexual problems you have? tlk true.

Pls this story does not fly.

Abi you think say we be Adamus' 4 here?
Re: Why Do Women Always Claim They Have Been Used And Dumped Once A Guy Leaves Them? by Elcapo(m): 11:21am On Nov 18, 2014
CoolHunk:
When I see that thing they call love in their eyes, that's when I decide it is a good time to run. That shiit's scary!
Re: Why Do Women Always Claim They Have Been Used And Dumped Once A Guy Leaves Them? by FLAWLES(f): 11:23am On Nov 18, 2014
lalasticlala:


Quite hilarious
.eeh
Re: Why Do Women Always Claim They Have Been Used And Dumped Once A Guy Leaves Them? by Nobody: 11:26am On Nov 18, 2014
Ladies have this weird and annoying mentality
Re: Why Do Women Always Claim They Have Been Used And Dumped Once A Guy Leaves Them? by Jonzingmaster(m): 11:42am On Nov 18, 2014
Sophyrocks:
Honestly, before i started dating i used to hear a lot of all these sob stories from females. And then i wonder and ask 'why all these sob stories'? Is it that guys are this horrible? With time as i started dating and getting to know men, ive come to understand that a guy cannot use and dump you unless you allow him to. Its all about maintaining your standards as a lady and avoiding situations where you compromise your moral values to please a guy. guys will not force you to do what you dnt want to do. So really, all these sob stories of use and dump can be minimised if only ladies know what they want, try nnot to always use their emotions to make decisions, have standards and stick to it. Guys cannot be all that bad and horrible.

Chai! NNE I owe you a kiss for this assertion..
Re: Why Do Women Always Claim They Have Been Used And Dumped Once A Guy Leaves Them? by Olufemiolaolu(m): 11:54am On Nov 18, 2014
most ladies xpect 2 eat their cake n have @ d same time. its never done. eni wa ifa wa ofo, it means Those who re xpecting free tins re looking 4 loss
Re: Why Do Women Always Claim They Have Been Used And Dumped Once A Guy Leaves Them? by Nobody: 11:59am On Nov 18, 2014
Majority or women only look for what they can take from a man and not how they can affect him positively.Why would u want man to promise you the world before u say yes to his proposal of a relationship?

1 Like

Re: Why Do Women Always Claim They Have Been Used And Dumped Once A Guy Leaves Them? by neighbourhud: 11:59am On Nov 18, 2014
Word!!!
will1am:
It's annoying when some ladies use such words. undecided
A man looking to commit will want to see ample signs of honesty,integrity,trustworthiness,thrift, sensitivity,sexuality,physical fitness, wholesome values and NOT--sluttiness, and other character traits.
The sad truth is that the vast majority of Nigerian women are simply unworthy of commitment.They are washed up party girls, who spent their attractive years drinking and sleeping with every good looking douchebag that hit on her.When she realizes her looks are starting to fade,only then does she start looking for a sucker to rope into commitment.By then she is nearly worthless as a wife and mother.
If you ain't got good qualities,you should be expecting to get humped,pumped and dumped nearly every time...
NOTA BENE --I am not a sexist. undecided

1 Like

Re: Why Do Women Always Claim They Have Been Used And Dumped Once A Guy Leaves Them? by RuuDie(m): 12:04pm On Nov 18, 2014
Toks2008:


You do the dumping.I PITY YOU.

You can never dump a man so wake up from your slumber. As long as he has tasted your goody bag you are the used and dumped one no matter how hot you may think you are.
I am not a sexist but the hard truth is that its a man's world.

You're fumbling there, you still dey learn... the day a woman will dump you, you will use your mouth and testify! A man can dump countless women, but it takes only one woman to dump a man to totally devastate him!!!

1 Like

Re: Why Do Women Always Claim They Have Been Used And Dumped Once A Guy Leaves Them? by Emperoradrian(m): 12:07pm On Nov 18, 2014
FLAWLES:
Not all women...........i can't imagin mahslf saying such words(i do d dumping´)+or its either i think we shld just go our separate way(ad das ntt dumping)
U DO D DUMPING abi No let nonso hear u o....after him don dump u last wk,u cum NL cum d talk say "u do d dumping"
Re: Why Do Women Always Claim They Have Been Used And Dumped Once A Guy Leaves Them? by Emperoradrian(m): 12:08pm On Nov 18, 2014
FLAWLES:
Not all women...........i can't imagin mahslf saying such words(i do d dumping´)+or its either i think we shld just go our separate way(ad das ntt dumping)
U DO D DUMPING abi No let nonso hear u o....after him don dump u last wk,u cum NL cum d talk say "u do d dumping" #godiswatchingyouontelemundo#
Re: Why Do Women Always Claim They Have Been Used And Dumped Once A Guy Leaves Them? by Basildvalour(m): 12:13pm On Nov 18, 2014
CuteMaro:
Persuasion? y are people sounding as if it's only guys Dat enjoys the Sex thing!? Well, as 4 the topic, one thing people should know is that love, infatuation or whatever eventually fades. So when building a relationship, apart from love, u should av Sumtn to offer, so wen it fades,there'll be Sumtn to hold on to, b4 it will cum back.
Definitely, only ladies who doesn't av anything other than their bodies to offer ends up getting dumped.
Pls, sir, how do u expect a virgin to enjoy sex and after all the emotional attachment, u leave her. U dont know if she places a curse on u with the blood u have erupted in her, no prayer would stop it from coming to pass except she forgives if while alive?
Re: Why Do Women Always Claim They Have Been Used And Dumped Once A Guy Leaves Them? by Toks2008(m): 12:13pm On Nov 18, 2014
RuuDie:


You're fumbling there, you still dey learn... the day a woman will dump you, you will use your mouth and testify! A man can dump countless women, but it takes only one woman to dump a man to totally devastate him!!!


You are getting it all twisted.

A man ofcourse can feel dumped WHY NOT. When a lady you love jilts you it can be tantamount to dumping so i quite understand all that.

But in the morale world where i belong to and where i believe most responsible people do, a lady can only claim to dump a man if he has not gotten between her legs hence its the other way round.

Do you know that a lady's goody bag is her integrity,pride,treasure and ultimate sacred possession so how can a man have access to that and you still pride yourself to dump such a man.

So please look at my assertion from a responsible point of view because i still maintain that ONLY A SLUTTY LADY WILL SAY SHE DUMPED A MAN.

1 Like

Re: Why Do Women Always Claim They Have Been Used And Dumped Once A Guy Leaves Them? by will1am: 12:19pm On Nov 18, 2014
Neroanna:
U sound like a red pill reader.... cheesy U sound like a red pill reader....
cheesy grin

4 Likes

Re: Why Do Women Always Claim They Have Been Used And Dumped Once A Guy Leaves Them? by franklynx(m): 12:19pm On Nov 18, 2014
Actually the fact be say na naija mentality be "dumpin' s**t.." For yankee na mutual fun n enjoyment. infact u go dey hear smthang like " The MF( moorfkr) knows what he missin".. s**t..!!! when the dude decide to free her.. grin
Re: Why Do Women Always Claim They Have Been Used And Dumped Once A Guy Leaves Them? by Hila12(m): 12:28pm On Nov 18, 2014
Bag of poo! It's only a foolish person that never takes responsibility for actions when it doesn't yield expected result. Women have been blaming men for failed relationships and marriages since 1943 when it is obvious that both genders have sexual urge and share the freewill to say NO! Men are emotionally involved as well in relationships even though they don't express it (it has to do with the ' I'm a man belief'). Men invest time in accommodating all the nagging and hormonal turmoil. Men (for those that can afford it) go extra miles to meet your outrageous fantasy of buying heaven and earth (all off his pocket). Men have to distance their close friends for you just because you don't like them (probably might have dated them before). Men have to fix all your mess because you feel the advice your girl friends gave you is better ( run back to us after you've made a shame of yourself). Men have their faults and alot of them too, but so do women. Some men cheat, some women do as well. Some men in relationships texts other girls, some women in relationships text other guys as well. Women invest emotions, men do as well. Men get sex a 1000 times, women asked for it 600 times. Women have biological years lost after a breakup, so do men (we could have invented cure to ebola in this time). So both genders share the blame when relationships fail. Ladies want all the alpha qualities of a bad boy and end up getting hurt once he's done with them (you get served your order!). Men never put guns to your head to keep you or lay you, most times you give and allow us freely. Finally, women say we lie/deceive them - rubbish! They've been thinking with their 'heart' since 1964. You can figure out lies some of the time if only you think above your hormones and using your head as well. PS: Not every man/woman does this, there are still some well mannered and rational ones out there if you look.

4 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Why Do Women Always Claim They Have Been Used And Dumped Once A Guy Leaves Them? by ihedinobi2: 12:29pm On Nov 18, 2014
UjSizzle:
It's life. We are all in the business of using people; some are just gracious enough to give you some form of compensation for being a good resource.
In one sense you're right. In another you're quite wrong. The first is in the sense that humans were built for one another. We need each other to make our lives work.

The second is this: humans were not built to be mercenary. We were not designed to define each other solely in terms of what benefits we can derive from each other. We were designed for mutual benefit and are naturally at home with acts of altruism. That means that we are, at least, as much at home with being of use as we are with using someone else.

We don't merely compensate someone for being a good resource then. We are normally supposed to be attracted to relationships where we can be of benefit in a relevant way and someone can also be of benefit to us in a relevant way.

With respect to the topic on hand, women can make that complaint because what a woman derives from a man ordinarily is security. Where women get it wrong is in assuming that they can exchange sexüal gratification for that security. That is not how it works. Sexüal gratification is not the currency that works in exchange for security. What a woman can exchange for the security she wants is ability.

That's another way of saying "inspiration". A man's ability is severely limited until a woman inspires him. The fact though is that a woman's gift of her attentions in any way is generally inspiring to the man taken with her so it is easy for her to assume that she is helping him by sleeping with him rather than deriving some benefit for herself.

But a wise woman knows that without a strong commitment, some gifts will only be despised rather than appreciated. So she would keep her sexüal attentions and offer instead other attentions that would also inspire the man, increase her value in his eyes and thus make him want even more from her.

It's like a man's gift of his wealth (a symbol of the security we are speaking of here). If he has not first proved for himself the woman's competence and sense of value for his wealth, sharing it with her will result in a loss of them and a sense of regret and despoiling.

Therefore, while we are built for mutual benefit, we are not built to be mercenary. We go as much where we can have our needs met and our dreams fulfilled as where we can meet somebody else's real needs and fulfill their dreams.

This is why there generally is some kind of resonance or agreement or "complementariness" between the two sets of needs and dreams. When both sets are disparate then "mercenariness" sets and we have a sense of scrambling and hustling. Everyone will be after satisfying their own needs first at whatever cost to their partner before considering giving whatever they feel is some kind of concession to appease their bruised conscience.

1 Like

Re: Why Do Women Always Claim They Have Been Used And Dumped Once A Guy Leaves Them? by UTEWUOJO: 12:52pm On Nov 18, 2014
I de always tire 4 dis question ooo!!! ladies common, take it from here.
Re: Why Do Women Always Claim They Have Been Used And Dumped Once A Guy Leaves Them? by youngice(m): 12:53pm On Nov 18, 2014
logica:
No wonder I have been a shadow of myself (and I therefore have no shadow since a shadow cannot form a shadow). The woman who took my virginity used me! I spent money on her, and got drained. This also applies to men right? Or is it for only women? Sebi we are equal na?
It aapplies to both men and women but men ...
Re: Why Do Women Always Claim They Have Been Used And Dumped Once A Guy Leaves Them? by sleek82(m): 1:03pm On Nov 18, 2014
Ilovenigeria:

You re so real and in touch with the world.

As long as relationship is concerned anybody can get used or dumped, the most secretive place we have in this world is "human heart", you never can tell what the other person thinks or plans for you. Count yourself lucky if you ended up with your first love. If you don't want to experience being used and dumped better not engage in and romantic affair which of course we all know is very difficult these days.

Go to romance section and see how boys are not smiling about this friend/brother zone of a thing. Or how a certain guy will patiently wait and date a girl for years until she gives up that punny. And the way they gloat and gist their friends about it can be heartbreaking. Girls feel bad because guys have more advantage in relationships, they move on faster than girls. They do the picking, selection and wooing at will while girls will wait patiently for good guys to come along (blame the society that made it so). Reason I always tell girls not to waste time with guys that treat them like options because there will be time you will look back with regrets and no man will be ready to toast you whereas the guy that wasted your time still have lots of sweet sixteen to pick from.

@Op, The question should be, WHY DO SOME GUYS DERIVE JOY, GLOAT AND TELL SILLY STORIES AFTER EATING A GIRLS PUNNY.

To me,when there is a break up I don't count sex as a loss cos I did it wholeheartedly. The only regret I have is wasting my precious time with someone who doesn't deserve me.



thats a good piece u wrote there but wasting ur time shouldnt even be ur regret....as it would only make u a beta person and increase ur knowledge. I bliv ur regret should be....if after those years you look back and noticed you learnt nothing from the experience then u could say it was a total waste of ur time. Since you cant tell the best man from afar, you are bound to waste time in searching for one....ur first pick could be d answer or vice versa
Re: Why Do Women Always Claim They Have Been Used And Dumped Once A Guy Leaves Them? by Nobody: 1:08pm On Nov 18, 2014
will1am:

It's annoying when some ladies use such words. undecided
A man looking to commit will want to see ample signs of honesty,integrity,trustworthiness,thrift, sensitivity,sexuality,physical fitness, wholesome values and NOT--sluttiness, and other character traits.
The sad truth is that the vast majority of Nigerian women are simply unworthy of commitment.They are washed up party girls, who spent their attractive years drinking and sleeping with every good looking douchebag that hit on her.When she realizes her looks are starting to fade,only then does she start looking for a sucker to rope into commitment.By then she is nearly worthless as a wife and mother.
If you ain't got good qualities,you should be expecting to get humped,pumped and dumped nearly every time...
NOTA BENE --I am not a sexist. undecided

What of the men? undecided
Re: Why Do Women Always Claim They Have Been Used And Dumped Once A Guy Leaves Them? by Nobody: 1:18pm On Nov 18, 2014
Not all women no doubts, but those who say they are used and dump are right, cos they are mere play toys. Real women understand that sex and love is mutual venture. And in every venture, risk of abortion is real.
Re: Why Do Women Always Claim They Have Been Used And Dumped Once A Guy Leaves Them? by Emaprince: 1:19pm On Nov 18, 2014
Sophyrocks:
Honestly, before i started dating i used to hear a lot of all these sob stories from females. And then i wonder and ask 'why all these sob stories'? Is it that guys are this horrible? With time as i started dating and getting to know men, ive come to understand that a guy cannot use and dump you unless you allow him to. Its all about maintaining your standards as a lady and avoiding situations where you compromise your moral values to please a guy. guys will not force you to do what you dnt want to do. So really, all these sob stories of use and dump can be minimised if only ladies know what they want, try nnot to always use their emotions to make decisions, have standards and stick to it. Guys cannot be all that bad and horrible.
wow!!..sophy,this is fantastic!!!...it should be among the comments of the year..it should educate all these clueless ladies out there..



@kachisbarbie
I've seen few of ya posts...honestly,whoever you are...you are pure gold!...always on point!!..
Re: Why Do Women Always Claim They Have Been Used And Dumped Once A Guy Leaves Them? by Neroanna(f): 1:32pm On Nov 18, 2014
will1am:
cheesy grin
leme take dat as a yes. cheesy
will1am:
cheesy grin
leme take dat as a yes.

2 Likes

Re: Why Do Women Always Claim They Have Been Used And Dumped Once A Guy Leaves Them? by will1am: 1:51pm On Nov 18, 2014
Neroanna:
leme take dat as a yes. cheesy leme take dat as a yes.
yeah, I do but not an ardent reader wink
Re: Why Do Women Always Claim They Have Been Used And Dumped Once A Guy Leaves Them? by Mrfils(m): 1:52pm On Nov 18, 2014
Use and dump? are you a tissue?
Re: Why Do Women Always Claim They Have Been Used And Dumped Once A Guy Leaves Them? by Nobody: 1:54pm On Nov 18, 2014
andromida:


So if a chic is sleeping you use her? This is why society has prostitutes to meet your randy needs not "use" the sleeping beauties. My humanoid friend you need to start paying for services. tongue

The game is never going to be stepped up but men can choose who they want to be Real men or man boys.

Which real nyggahs? take a quick browse through the romance section.

Lol, I'm a changed man and I stopped selling dreams to chics. These days I just keep it real (sometimes too real), and once I see through for who she's. Rather than sell her a dream, I just keep it moving. A lot of these chics are fake and phony, they love big dreams lol.

However, there is absolutely nothing bad in selling dreams to chics that love dreaming big, and exist in their own grandiose fantasies. It is either you play smart or end up being the victim. And being a victim is a sin.

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: Why Do Women Always Claim They Have Been Used And Dumped Once A Guy Leaves Them? by Maeblaq: 1:57pm On Nov 18, 2014
cupidhero:
OP God will bless you,i have asked a million girls this question and they have never given me a good answer. my ex GF wanted to sexually relate with me but declined and gave stupid reasons. imagine a dude running away from such opportunity. she had no idea i was only doing it cos of what or how she might feel like after we seperate. you can't tell where this things are heading,you might just hit a rock anyday. This particular comments from these ladies is why i stay away from so many relationships i could have had. give me a green light and watch me break traffic laws with my space car. ladies always feel used,dumped and whatever anytime we say it is over. i tire for una o.
so all dis while dat u' ve been running away frm dose precious opportunities,aw av been coping with ur sexual lifeabi u dey self-service
Re: Why Do Women Always Claim They Have Been Used And Dumped Once A Guy Leaves Them? by Maeblaq: 1:59pm On Nov 18, 2014
Maeblaq:
so all dis while dat u' ve been running away frm dose precious opportunities,aw av been coping with ur sexual lifeabi u dey self-service
shey u dey self-service?

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