sexyseun:
@ OP.. Dont mind those saying Se.x is not everything, na lie oooo, As for me, se.x is vital in my marriage oooo, any man wey no sabi do d do i reject him by fire by force, its a prayer point oooo,, u wanna know anoda one? Any man wey no sabi go pass 3 rounds i reject him by fire by force! Se.x is sweet, its refreshing, its amazing, its wonderful and no wonder God truly endorses it for our procreation. I am an advocate of good se.x i wish i can be appointed as a female Ambassador on sexual matters in Nigeria.

See Babe, go confront am, make im go find correct jedi abi wetin una dey call am, if he cant last more than 40mins continuously non-stop....END the Relationship ASAP

I have ambassador work for you o!

It's a publication.

Mintayo:
Marriage is not just about sex, there are better things than sex to look for in a partner.
I don't even understand What people mean by sexual compatibility, is it not to satisfy your partners? Is that anything hard in that? Is it something one cannot learn per time?
Is it not to penetrate a woman's VJ after some pre-intimacy? Is it not the mourning, screaming and coming

I tire oo

bellamafia:


This is the thought that keeps running through my mind, its a lifelong commitment.

lol, obviously you vs made up your mind to leave. a 1000 comments before you typed this advised you to stay and work on you two being better at sex since there are more important things than sex in a marriage. yet, the only post you could quote was that one asking you to leave as its a life long affair. leave already, you most likely don't deserve that bro.

@op, sex is a very serious issue especially if you are already very active!

It's only virgins that might wanna manage whatever comes their way. Not somebody who has already tasted the sweetness of satisfying sex. So, take it as seriously as it deserves and never mind those advising you to just go ahead and marry the man. You obviously have had some great sex and it wouldn't be wise for you to settle for less, otherwise, you are a sure candidate for adultery.

My advice is; If you know the guy can't do it the way you want it and isn't capable of improving, dump his ass$ and get yourself a real nigga.

What is marriage about if I cannot tell my man what and how I want it. I don't think you have talked this through wiv him. This is a man u plan to spend your life wiv and u are coming to nairaland to complain.


Op u have no problem. If u say u guys think alike and have the same view about life then telling him or helping him out won't be a problem. The only problem is if he is willing to learn or if he is a man that doesn't see sex as something to be enjoyed but for procreation. Tell him what u want my dear. His response would tell u all u need to know. If he is willing to satisfy u and himself please stay.

Well here goes nothing. I'm not married, but sex plays an important role in marriages. Please do not listen to any 'holier than thou' peeps.

I have a friend who is married, and she complained to me about her hubbys' inexperience in things sexual. According to my friend, they kept it in their pants till they got married and she ended up being disappointed with him and this 'small thing' has put a cog in the wheel of their marriage because the guy in question has refused to update his sexual skills.

My advice is this, tell him point blank that he sucks when it comes to sex. There are countless books on the female anatomy and everything sexual I would recommend you download one and discretely pass it along to him. 'The Female Org..asm Black Book' Read this book and teach him.

I used to suck in sex, but I read books, 'practiced' and today I am more than manageable in the sack, I can make any womans' toes curl when I go down on her.

'nuff said.

well,it really is a tight position to be in..on the bright side,you have a guy that loves you and will do anyting to make you happy..he's goodlooking also..on the down side,he is not good in bed and isnt physically attractive..well,who wudnt want a partner that's good in bed? i feel its best you have a one on one conversation with him..tell him the issues you feel need to be addressed..mak sure u approach him in a kind loving and respectful manner so as not to sound unpleasent...i think you're the only one that knows what you want in bed..how you want to be pleased..tell him,keep telling him..tell him he's good in bed but you'd like him to get better..this way,you dnt come off as to brush his ego.as to him not being physically attractive if youre ok with that,fine..if youre not,find a nice gym close by and register him there..if he asks why,tell him you need your man to keep fit..so if anyone tries to oppress you,you'd call your man to woop dia ass!
he'd probably find it funny and you both will laugh about it...hope this helps..wish you a beautiful life with your partner.

Setaje:
What is marriage about if I cannot tell my man what and how I want it. I don't think you have talked this through wiv him. This is a man u plan to spend your life wiv and u are coming to nairaland to complain.


Op u have no problem. If u say u guys think alike and have the same view about life then telling him or helping him out won't be a problem. The only problem is if he is willing to learn or if he is a man that doesn't see sex as something to be enjoyed but for procreation. Tell him what u want my dear. His response would tell u all u need to know. If he is willing to satisfy u and himself please stay.

Thanks for contributing, ive told him severally, he never learns. It sometimes feels like my pleasure is not a priority, which makes matters worse.

bellamafia:
Hello Romancelanders,

I am in dire need of serious, unbiased advice to avert making a lifelong mistake. Serious comments only please, no trolls, judgemental people, immature guys and girls, religious extreemists NOT allowed in here.

Im a young lady, 27 years of age, have a nice job in a good company, very goodlooking. The reason for this description is to give a background to my plight.

I'm at that phase in my life where im ready to start a family. I always imagined that i would meet a guy randomly, fall in love and get married, but that has not been the case. With age, i learnt that marriage is not a fairytail and that one must think thoroughly, and venture with the head and the heart.

I have a guy whom ive dated on and off for 2 years and hes asked me to marry him a couple of times. We are very good friends, we have a certain kind of understanding, his family likes me, we share the same beliefs, ideologies and outlook on life. He can trek from berger to ojuelegba is that would make me happy.

However, we are not sexuall.y compatible. i mean the se.x is nothing to write home about. Ive tried many times to help him out, tell him what to do, etc but he never ever gets it right. That is a major issue for me. Hes also not so physically attractive, but im ok with his looks.

Im confused because i have a lot of other men flocking around me, showing indications of seriousness, but you know what they say about the devil you know and the angel you dont know.

I need advice please

Thank you

bellamafia:
Hello Romancelanders,

I am in dire need of serious, unbiased advice to avert making a lifelong mistake. Serious comments only please, no trolls, judgemental people, immature guys and girls, religious extreemists NOT allowed in here.

Im a young lady, 27 years of age, have a nice job in a good company, very goodlooking. The reason for this description is to give a background to my plight.

I'm at that phase in my life where im ready to start a family. I always imagined that i would meet a guy randomly, fall in love and get married, but that has not been the case. With age, i learnt that marriage is not a fairytail and that one must think thoroughly, and venture with the head and the heart.

I have a guy whom ive dated on and off for 2 years and hes asked me to marry him a couple of times. We are very good friends, we have a certain kind of understanding, his family likes me, we share the same beliefs, ideologies and outlook on life. He can trek from berger to ojuelegba is that would make me happy.

However, we are not sexuall.y compatible. i mean the se.x is nothing to write home about. Ive tried many times to help him out, tell him what to do, etc but he never ever gets it right. That is a major issue for me. Hes also not so physically attractive, but im ok with his looks.

Im confused because i have a lot of other men flocking around me, showing indications of seriousness, but you know what they say about the devil you know and the angel you dont know.

I need advice please

Thank you

...r u light skin?

justmuhd:
well,it really is a tight position to be in..on the bright side,you have a guy that loves you and will do anyting to make you happy..he's goodlooking also..on the down side,he is not good in bed and isnt physically attractive..well,who wudnt want a partner that's good in bed? i feel its best you have a one on one conversation with him..tell him the issues you feel need to be addressed..mak sure u approach him in a kind loving and respectful manner so as not to sound unpleasent...i think you're the only one that knows what you want in bed..how you want to be pleased..tell him,keep telling him..tell him he's good in bed but you'd like him to get better..this way,you dnt come off as to brush his ego.as to him not being physically attractive if youre ok with that,fine..if youre not,find a nice gym close by and register him there..if he asks why,tell him you need your man to keep fit..so if anyone tries to oppress you,you'd call your man to woop dia ass!
he'd probably find it funny and you both will laugh about it...hope this helps..wish you a beautiful life with your partner.

Was certainly helpful, will do so.

Keneking:
First , you need to improve on your writing skills before we can address your points.

Second, what denomination do you belong? I mean where do you worship?

Third, describe your physique. I mean give a vivid description of your physical shape? This is important to compare with the demands of the market at this point.

Fourth, 27 years of age is way to young to enter into marriage. From your expression, it suggests that you want to go into that institution due to peer pressures and societal expectations.

Fifth, your argument about an angel and devil is not ideal in this context. If I get you, it appears that you want someone else but urgently require approval from Nairalanders to engage in such unholy act.

By the way, don't you think it is sin to engage in an illicit affair with a man whom you are not married to

since u don't xtian ex., do what suits you. no one here can help because we're all limited in knowledge. when u're ready to have a fulfilled home, go to God to lead u aright.

Bellamafia

Be truthful... your P**** is wide...

girls/women are quick to say the guy's d**k is small when its their p***** that is wide

All I know is that $exual compatibility is very important in marriage, especially when one of the party is really interested in $ex.

bellamafia:
Hello Romancelanders,

I am in dire need of serious, unbiased advice to avert making a lifelong mistake. Serious comments only please, no trolls, judgemental people, immature guys and girls, religious extreemists NOT allowed in here.

Im a young lady, 27 years of age, have a nice job in a good company, very goodlooking. The reason for this description is to give a background to my plight.

I'm at that phase in my life where im ready to start a family. I always imagined that i would meet a guy randomly, fall in love and get married, but that has not been the case. With age, i learnt that marriage is not a fairytail and that one must think thoroughly, and venture with the head and the heart.

I have a guy whom ive dated on and off for 2 years and hes asked me to marry him a couple of times. We are very good friends, we have a certain kind of understanding, his family likes me, we share the same beliefs, ideologies and outlook on life. He can trek from berger to ojuelegba is that would make me happy.

However, we are not sexuall.y compatible. i mean the se.x is nothing to write home about. Ive tried many times to help him out, tell him what to do, etc but he never ever gets it right. That is a major issue for me. Hes also not so physically attractive, but im ok with his looks.

Im confused because i have a lot of other men flocking around me, showing indications of seriousness, but you know what they say about the devil you know and the angel you dont know.

I need advice please

Thank you

"Na pikin wey chop outside dey talk say him mama food no sweet".

sexyseun:
@ OP.. Dont mind those saying Se.x is not everything, na lie oooo, As for me, se.x is vital in my marriage oooo, any man wey no sabi do d do i reject him by fire by force, its a prayer point oooo,, u wanna know anoda one? Any man wey no sabi go pass 3 rounds i reject him by fire by force! Se.x is sweet, its refreshing, its amazing, its wonderful and no wonder God truly endorses it for our procreation. I am an advocate of good se.x i wish i can be appointed as a female Ambassador on sexual matters in Nigeria.

See Babe, go confront am, make im go find correct jedi abi wetin una dey call am, if he cant last more than 40mins continuously non-stop....END the Relationship ASAP

Wow!
One man is all these things in bed and still gat a wonderful personality,plus cash?
#PoorMe

You are one lucky lady.

sexyseun:
@ OP.. Dont mind those saying Se.x is not everything, na lie oooo, As for me, se.x is vital in my marriage oooo, any man wey no sabi do d do i reject him by fire by force, its a prayer point oooo,, u wanna know anoda one? Any man wey no sabi go pass 3 rounds i reject him by fire by force! Se.x is sweet, its refreshing, its amazing, its wonderful and no wonder God truly endorses it for our procreation. I am an advocate of good se.x i wish i can be appointed as a female Ambassador on sexual matters in Nigeria.

See Babe, go confront am, make im go find correct jedi abi wetin una dey call am, if he cant last more than 40mins continuously non-stop....END the Relationship ASAP

hahahahahahahahhaahahahahahahahahahaha...... Seun Seun... female Ambassador on sexual matters..... .. Nairaland no go kill me oooo

kennygee:
Sex, there is a reason why the bible is against Fornication.

Na Iranu dey worry you.

You are looking for a man that will give you Christian Grey kind of sex but will be nothing to write home about as long as being a husband is concerned eh?

Please, drop his number so that women who are "REALLY" looking for good men to marry can grab him.

But she pleaded for you not to judge her!
And again, is it bad to have it all if you can?

bellamafia:
Hello Romancelanders,

I am in dire need of serious, unbiased advice to avert making a lifelong mistake. Serious comments only please, no trolls, judgemental people, immature guys and girls, religious extreemists NOT allowed in here.

Im a young lady, 27 years of age, have a nice job in a good company, very goodlooking. The reason for this description is to give a background to my plight.

I'm at that phase in my life where im ready to start a family. I always imagined that i would meet a guy randomly, fall in love and get married, but that has not been the case. With age, i learnt that marriage is not a fairytail and that one must think thoroughly, and venture with the head and the heart.

I have a guy whom ive dated on and off for 2 years and hes asked me to marry him a couple of times. We are very good friends, we have a certain kind of understanding, his family likes me, we share the same beliefs, ideologies and outlook on life. He can trek from berger to ojuelegba is that would make me happy.

However, we are not sexuall.y compatible. i mean the se.x is nothing to write home about. Ive tried many times to help him out, tell him what to do, etc but he never ever gets it right. That is a major issue for me. Hes also not so physically attractive, but im ok with his looks.

Im confused because i have a lot of other men flocking around me, showing indications of seriousness, but you know what they say about the devil you know and the angel you dont know.

I need advice please

Thank you

U obviously don't knw what u want.

My question; how will u regard this kind of man as your husband, am afraid his inability to satisfy u in bed is beginning to detract from d respect u have for this guy. They way u phrase d story seems like this guy has been begging for u to marry him, & u're considering it out of pity.

Sex is a crucial factor in any marriage, it shouldn't be compromised. Personally, it's d bedrock of marriage, any marriage devoid of a fulfilling sex is likely to face chaos. We all have different degree of penchant for sex, if u're convinced his performance is below your satisfaction, I suggest u scuttle any marriage plans, to avert adultery.

U also made mention of some crop of men flocking around u. What makes u think those men are ready for marriage?

bellamafia:


Thanks for contributing, ive told him severally, he never learns. It sometimes feels like my pleasure is not a priority, which makes matters worse.

Chaiiiiiiiiiiii that's not to good o. So that means when he cums, he doesn't care about u. That's so wrong. That to me is being selfish. Might be wrong but maybe u should deny him sex when he is really in the mood. Once or twice and remind him that this is exactly how u feel when he doesn't make any effort to satisfy u. Just maybe he will get the picture.


By the way, Nigerians Ehhhhn! Hypocritical lot. Because it's a woman complaining of not being satisfied. U guys are already calling her names and telling her to stay but when men complain that their wives are not satisfying them enough and they go outside. There is no problem ba. Why don't u advise the men to manage too or be patient enough to teach the wife?. I expect people to tell her to be patient or teach him but instead she is being insulted. Sex is not food yet people cheat!

Op it seems to me your guy is selfish. Very typical for Nigerian men as I have heard. . Very impatient. Want to go straight to the point. Feel like it is only them that should enjoy it. If u open your mouth and say u want it this way. It means u are a HOE.


Try deny him sex. See his reaction. If he feels hurt then u can have a honest talk wiv him. If he acts non challant. Am sorry, ur guy is not sexually inclined after all. The problem now is wiv u. Can u cope?. Don't cause pain for that guy o by marrying him and then cheat. Its up to you. Just have it at the back of your mind. Nobody is perfect.

Dear op.

It doesn't really matter how long you guys have dated. What really matter is how strong is the love and how much the both of you are willing to sacrifice to make the union work..

Love making is one of the characteristics of a successful marriage. If your man can not give u the necessary satisfaction, and in no mode to improve, you need to ask yourself if you have what it takes to endure the frustrations and temptation that accompanies such shortcomings without cheating on him. I hope you know the difference between courtship and marriage?.

As for other guys.
All I can say is = the most successful and happy people in the world are those who take Risk.. but it most be a reasonable one.

Love is Good in a relationship , but love alone can not sustain marriage. Personally, I am a sex freak. So no matter the amount of love I have for anyone, I can not marry anyone who doesn't have the same sexual ideology as me.

get married to him and continue teaching him MAYBE one day he will learn.

Setaje:




Chaiiiiiiiiiiii that's not to good o. So that means when he cums, he doesn't care about u. That's so wrong. That to me is being selfish. Might be wrong but maybe u should deny him sex when he is really in the mood. Once or twice and remind him that this is exactly how u feel when he doesn't make any effort to satisfy u. Just maybe he will get the picture.


By the way, Nigerians Ehhhhn! Hypocritical lot. Because it's a woman complaining of not being satisfied. U guys are already calling her names and telling her to stay but when men complain that their wives are not satisfying them enough and they go outside. There is no problem ba. Why don't u advise the men to manage too or be patient enough to teach the wife?. I expect people to tell her to be patient or teach him but instead she is being insulted. Sex is not food yet people cheat!

Op it seems to me your guy is selfish. Very typical for Nigerian men as I have heard. . Very impatient. Want to go straight to the point. Feel like it is only them that should enjoy it. If u open your mouth and say u want it this way. It means u are a HOE.


Try deny him sex. See his reaction. If he feels hurt then u can have a honest talk wiv him. If he acts non challant. Am sorry, ur guy is not sexually inclined after all. The problem now is wiv u. Can u cope?. Don't cause pain for that guy o by marrying him and then cheat. Its up to you. Just have it at the back of your mind. Nobody is perfect.

Denying a guy sex is a very childish act...

I'm beginning to think bellamafia == setaje..

If her p**** was tight she wouldn't be complaining... From her write up its easy to know she is promiscuous...

Promiscuous guys are the same as promiscuous women...

bellamafia:
Hello Romancelanders,

I am in dire need of serious, unbiased advice to avert making a lifelong mistake. Serious comments only please, no trolls, judgemental people, immature guys and girls, religious extreemists NOT allowed in here.

Im a young lady, 27 years of age, have a nice job in a good company, very goodlooking. The reason for this description is to give a background to my plight.

I'm at that phase in my life where im ready to start a family. I always imagined that i would meet a guy randomly, fall in love and get married, but that has not been the case. With age, i learnt that marriage is not a fairytail and that one must think thoroughly, and venture with the head and the heart.

I have a guy whom ive dated on and off for 2 years and hes asked me to marry him a couple of times. We are very good friends, we have a certain kind of understanding, his family likes me, we share the same beliefs, ideologies and outlook on life. He can trek from berger to ojuelegba is that would make me happy.

However, we are not sexuall.y compatible. i mean the se.x is nothing to write home about. Ive tried many times to help him out, tell him what to do, etc but he never ever gets it right. That is a major issue for me. Hes also not so physically attractive, but im ok with his looks.

Im confused because i have a lot of other men flocking around me, showing indications of seriousness, but you know what they say about the devil you know and the angel you dont know.

I need advice please

Thank you

Hmmm....Bella Mafia...

I read that novel many, many, many moons ago - when men were boys, and still read novels.


Because of your id, I'd give my 2 cents.

No need to suggest it, very few persons can live a sexually frustrated life and still be happy. And when that primal itch isn't scratched properly, it tends to throw spanners in the works.

More nagging, and less respect for the man of the house. And that's hardly the recipe for Happily Ever After...

But what I would suggest is give him a few more tries to learn. Get him materials in that direction.


The sexual problems of MOST men fall under 3 categories (and can be fixed!):

1.) Finishing too quick

2.) Not understanding the female sexual response.

3.) Madonna/Whöre Complex.



The trouble with the first is obvious. And it's also somehow, a symptom of problem #2.

And problem #2 has many manifestations:

- Zero to no föreplay
- Firing away, all-through like a jackrabbit - at 100 metric tonnes (lol, a girl once asked me: "Buddhapalm are you pounding yam" . Thanks to years of pórn conditioning and the masculine braggadocio of "I bánged her so hard that she can't walk" you now have a fine recipe for breaking many a girls waists .

- Not arousing you properly. A very aroused girl is hanging fruit - easy pickings.
- Thinking his only tool is his phallus. Hence not knowing other things he could do to get you off - even before making contact with his man-bat.


But problem 3 is even more difficult to overcome. It's difficult for some men to envision their 'woman' as anything else but a prim, proper, 'Christian girl'. So they limit the range of things they could do, and the ways they could act in the bedroom.

But give them some random new girl, and they would give her a night to remember.

Finally, if you tell me where his problem falls, I'll recommend materials (DVDs and eBooks) that would help him out - if he's even willing to try. You know what leviathans our egos are .

EggovinMma:


You see my sister, in search of what appears to be 'breakthrough ', you might end up getting more than what you bargained for.I advice you give your man sometime to' arrive' since he appears to be a good husband material in the heart.

Very funny story,why are you not on the literature section giving it to us?

Madam poster

My advise to you now is to repent and ask God for mercy. SEX is not for single men or women its for married people you experimenting with him is bad. I cant even advise you to stick to him or leave him because the foundation already is destroyed. Now where do you want to build on.

#themarriagebedundefiled#

@Op,be sincere n answer this question; have u slept with another fellow aside him. Secondly I feel the issues go beyond sex,u can't seem to come around the fact that the said fellow isn't ya type of man physical wise. If truly he isn't,I'll advocate u kiss d r/ship goodbye cause I don't see any sense of fulfilment on ya side if u guys tie the knot. Do u a favour n cut him loose.

Come marry me, I'm sexually active, good looking and single

E no concern me joor!