buygala:
Op should stop crying over spilt milk and move on to try and impregnate a younger damsel....There are a lot of them these days who are ready to be baby mamas for the right price .... ask Olamide, Davido, Wizkid, etc

This is one of the few situations where Cheating is not only advisable but absolutely necessary..... A woman who can hide such a sensitive matter isn't worthy of being faithful to ..... op might as well divorce the woman and marry some younger blood if his conscience is too soft to allow him cheat


And for all those acting here all 'mature' and shitt , Being 'mature' by forgiving his wife isn't going to give him kids or undo the lie .... That marriage is irretrievably doomed because the dude will even start questioning the woman's 'Good Morning', and the woman will always feel guilty and victimized if any argument comes up in the house. ... THE PASTOR ISN'T GOING TO BE THERE WHEN ALL THE BAD BLOOD STARTS COMING OUT AFTER THE 'FORGIVENESS' ...... A WOMAN WHO CAN LIE LIKE DAT CAN EVEN KILL, AND DOESN'T DESERVE FORGIVENESS OR ANY SOFT LANDING OF ANY KIND

Dannyabu:
My Wife Lied About Her Age

I need matured and sincere advice please!

ronald4lif:
The marriage is founded on lies, deception and dissimulation and should be dissolved on the grounds of misleading and distortion of vital information that could make or mar it subsistency.

As a grown up man, a bachelor, you must have dreamt of having your own child, someone that would sustain your bloodline and not adoption. You embarked on marriage with the anticipation, expectation and delightment of having your own child, harbouring the thought of what junior and ada would look like only to realize that the to-be mother of your unborn kids played a fast one on you even as she was aware that menopause is lurking around her thereby dashing your hopes, dreams and aspirations of a father away in a twinkle of an eye. That to me is heartless, cruel and unpardonable. I'd move on if I were you.

Sagamite:


How can people be this dumb they have no problem come across as cretins?

chigoizie7:
Why has people refused to see the real life here?

This marriage was built on lies from the onset. And nothing built on lies can last.

How could she?

Pastor or no pastor, oga abeg find one pino pino sharp bae and knack her better belle.

If ur wife can lie to u all these while, then she should be ready to live with the consequences of her actions.


8yrs no be 8hrs bro, abi she no reason am say she gats bear kids for u?

sonofananimal:
LOLZ!! I

I FEEL REALLY SAD FOR THE OP, AND KIND OF IMAGINE IF IT WAS ME, WHAT WILL I DO? MANY PEOPLE HERE MAKE A SIMILAR COMMENT TELLING THE OP TO "FORGIVE"
YOU CAN FORGIVE A PERSON BUT IT IS VERY HARD TO FORGET WHAT YOU HAVE GONE THROUGH, THE BELIEVE YOU ONCE HAVE THAT YOU ARE IN CHARGE OF HER, MAKING SOME KEY FAMILY DECISION LIKE IF YOU ARE THE SENIOR BUT NOT KNOWING SHE IS PLAYING YOU LIKE A CARD OR RATHER MAKE YOU BELIEVE YOU ARE IN CHARGE BUT FAIL TO REALIZE THAT NATURE IS AROUND THE CORNER WAITING FOR THE RIGHT TIME TO STRIKE.

THE PROBLEM NOW IS THAT THE OP HAS LOST HIS HAPPINESS AND FEEL CHEATED BY HER.

THE ONLY BEST WAY TO REGAIN HIS HAPPINESS IS IF HE :

1. DIVORCE HER


2. HAVE A SECOND WIFE


3. HAVE A KID OUTSIDE OR CONCUBINE



IF HE SAID HE WANT TO FORGIVE HER AND STILL LIVE WITH HER!! OR DID THAT SURROGATE STUFF, I BET YOU!! HE WILL RUN MAD IN SOME CERTAIN STAGE OF LIFE, EVEN RIGHT NOW HE WILL NOT EVEN WHAT TO LOOK AT HIS WIFE EYE TO EYE OR RATHER EVEN SLEEP WITH HER. COS HIS PERSPECTIVE OF HER HAVE ALREADY CHANGE. IT ONLY TAKES THE GRACE OF GOD OR RATHER A MIRACLE WHICH WILL BE 0.0000001% FOR THEM TO SETTLE THINGS NOW.

mechanics:
Sir, since she has told u d truth, den u need to 4give n 4get, u talked abt beauty, did u marry her base on beauty, if dats d case u need to pray to God to bring back d luv u had 4 ur wife b4 u got weded, divorce is nt d issue, believe God ur wife wil cari her baby, hw old was Sarah wen she gave birth to Isaac, read Gen 11:30, 16:1, 18: 1-15, 21:1-8, oda women who were barren and God answered their prayers were Ruth, Rebeccah etc, dey waited patiently on God, and dey didnt divorce their husbands, pray without ceasing, 1 Thess 5:16-18.

peppyluv02:
What's with Nigerians and 'football age' especially women. Is it a crime to grow old?
The foundation of your marriage was built on lies..Even if she is now mother Theresa,she is a liar and a pretender.
You are 39 now,she is 47...In 3years,she will be 50!
If you were my brother,sorry,you are leaving her!

Who the hell is the pastor? Why didn't he teach her not to lie and not deceive a young man into marriage.

deadZONE:
U dey chop age? my guy if e dey pain u divorce am make we hear word....

Dannyabu:
My Wife Lied About Her Age

She says, of course, that she feared I would walk away if I knew the truth, but she must have known it would come out sometime, somehow. I think I still love her, she is really a wife material, respectful, lovable and very industrious lady but I feel so betrayed! Letting a husband believe you're years younger than you are with all the implications for child-bearing, is a grotesque deception.

Maybe if my wife had been honest with me from the beginning, knowing her age I would have adjusted my planning and expectations for children. But she lied. Should I prove her right in her assumption that when I found out the truth, I would walk away? Any thoughts on helping us get through this? I have given all my resources to make this marriage work.

I need matured and sincere advice please!

Dannyabu:
My Wife Lied About Her Age

Four years ago at 35, I married my wife, who I thought was 35. We both wanted children, but unfortunately, she had miscarriage in the second year and stillbirth in the third year. We began consulting a fertility specialist.

After she started asking questions, my wife admitted she is actually eight years older than she had led me to believe. She's 47 years old! She's cried and cried, begging for my forgiveness.

She's gone to try fertility treatments to get pregnant, but I don't want her to continue that for health reasons. I have forgiven her but as an African man; I'm NOT willing to consider the adoption option. She says, of course, that she feared I would walk away if I knew the truth, but she must have known it would come out sometime, somehow. I think I still love her, she is really a wife material, respectful, lovable and very industrious lady but I feel so betrayed! Letting a husband believe you're years younger than you are with all the implications for child-bearing, is a grotesque deception. Sometimes, I'm always wondering if some things she says are the truth. Moreover, after all the wahala and years in-between, her beauty has really waned. She now looks old! We have become butts of joke from neighbours and even strangers when they see us walking together. I look way younger than she is.

I think of getting another wife, but that has not been my person. I think of divorce, but where do I start? Have I wasted 4 years of my life just like that? We still have faith that miracles do happen. Our pastor has asked me to forgive her and move on, that my ability to forgive her will make her more loyal and obedient to me. She is a naturally good person, but for this act of deception.

Maybe if my wife had been honest with me from the beginning, knowing her age I would have adjusted my planning and expectations for children. But she lied. Should I prove her right in her assumption that when I found out the truth, I would walk away? Any thoughts on helping us get through this? I have given all my resources to make this marriage work.

I need matured and sincere advice please!

kikelomojessy:
OP, I know it hurts cos the age differnce is to much. But let's see it dis way, if you happened to be the one seeking her forgiveness wudnt u want her to forgive u so that both of u can continue as before.

I tink she must hav been a very beautiful woman for her age not to had shown (late 50's ). And u neva bother to know how her feminine side was doin ( irregula menstral period etc)

My advice wud be that u sit down with her and talk tins out, u can adopt (its not always bad to adopt, afterall is not all parent dat is proud to call dir biological kids dir own) or wait and seek God face. He alone gives children.

I hav witness a virgin lady that got married and didn't hav a child till after 7yrs. And hav seen older women givng births like Hebrew women.
There some situations where men take out a second wife or mistress to bare a child but the child did not live long enuf to bless his parents.

Pls Go down on ur kneels and ask God for direction. Pray with ur wife and wat ever decision both of u decides on will be the best.

You said she is a wife material and u love her. So do Wats best.

Xmen149:
Love..love..love every were...cnt you see its all a game from the start..nawa o,..1)she knws the age gap..2)she kept quite knwing her chances of making babies is thin,.and wnt let u decide if u wnt that too...here is her game sumary bro..:play 100% good to trap his hrt and emotion 4ever weakening him to his feet..then shut-up and get married..allow years to passby to make divorce seem like a childsplay..then burst the truth bubbles..now he is week and down by the unrecoverable yrs/my goodnes and tears that wl still keep me in his house..everytin stil going wrng? I stil has his hrt as he wl 4ever be weak so i still dictate and my resolve is we adopt a baby and i raise it,this mother and child display will finally smelt his hearth in my palms that now its vivid am going no-were.............sorry u featured in 'GAME OF MARRIAGE BRO'....bt vacancy for the producer stil exist....try this game:.rent a woman with a bit grown child teling her they are 4rm ur past or ua sorry u hv bn cheating all these yrs and this is the result and see everyting u thought exists in her is a mirage....i likia iburu ihe na esi,anyi akpo gi ori mai-mai.

sweatlana:
I lied about my age too. I'm not proud of it but after we got married my husband found out I was 3 years younger. He wasn't angry it was no big deal cos I opened up.

Forgive her and move on. She did the wrong thing for maybe the right reason...

segzicres:


I'm sorry but you need to have your head checked. this is the kind of nonsense that makes me question my faith.

emmyrichie:


You are not mature at all... And you need to upgrade your mentality and ways of approach.

Sorry if that hurts.