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How Do I Get The "old" Her Back? - Romance - Nairaland

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How Do I Get The "old" Her Back? by Woodpecker(m): 1:40am On Mar 28, 2009
abcdefg
Re: How Do I Get The "old" Her Back? by DeReloaded: 1:43am On Mar 28, 2009
Wow yu're pathetic.

Will she pay for the wedding too?

Akuse.
Re: How Do I Get The "old" Her Back? by topup: 3:57am On Mar 28, 2009
Is there any way you can find out what's been affecting her lately, is she busy these days making preparations for the wedding, is there an issue she has been trying to bring up, or something both of you can't decide on?

If you answered 'no' to all the above, then maybe you need to take the incentive, not just call her, but do some out of the ordinary things to make her realise why she's with you. Do some purposefully romantic things, and she should be perked. If she feels you're complacent, she could easily become it too, especially if she's always been the one to spice up the relationship, like you mentioned.

It's all supposed to be 50:50, it seems now you're compensating for her lack of effort.

Maybe a talk is in need.
Re: How Do I Get The "old" Her Back? by C2H5OH(f): 4:06am On Mar 28, 2009
Why must one person suddenly have to take on the responsibility for the "two" of you. If she has lost interest in you, don't force her out of it. You would soon be more miserable in your marriage anyhow.

Maybe everything is fine with her. Though you seem to be the one having problems with her behavior, why don't you step up to her about it and ask the questions. The communication line is not dead is it?
Re: How Do I Get The "old" Her Back? by Woodpecker(m): 9:44am On Mar 28, 2009
@dereloaded pls shut ur trap if u cant understand simple english. i pay for every single dime we spend and i'm paying for 90% of the wedding expenses
@ others- thanks a lot, but the thing is i've tried talking to her abt it but she insists that nothing's wrong and personally i just think shes lost the old excitement. we see each other very regularly and always talk on the phone for @ least an hour everyday. i just want that old excitement back before we get married and the routined life starts
Re: How Do I Get The "old" Her Back? by Nobody: 9:55am On Mar 28, 2009
Since u love her so much,Sit her down,tell her 'baby,u have been so wonderful lately,but ur old self made more sense to me.I know we're all humans are we are bound to make mistakes,n i know i must have offended u one way or the other either consciously or in my sub-consciousness,but i say i'm sorry.But if the reason for ur recent change is because u have something botherin u,then i wanna be a part of it.Remember how we started,u've always been all i have n my source of joy,i wouldn't want to let u go cos i would loose a hold of life itself.U're going to kill me emotionally n physically,n i will be ridiculed.I know u're not that bad,but sweetheart,d truth is that i'm scared i'm loosin u,n i dont want to get to that point,whatever it is u want me to do,u just tell me,cos u're one thing i just cant let go in this world,cos u're my wealth here on earth'.
Re: How Do I Get The "old" Her Back? by DrTony1(m): 10:21am On Mar 28, 2009
Guy U are too much. @woodpecker, thats a prototype/masterpiece tinaya gave U there.
@tinaya, did U later find the Queen of ur Heart?? I feel U man
Re: How Do I Get The "old" Her Back? by DrTony1(m): 10:22am On Mar 28, 2009
Guy U are too much. @woodpecker, thats a prototype/masterpiece tiniyata gave U there.
@tinyata, did U later find the Queen of ur Heart?? I feel U man
Re: How Do I Get The "old" Her Back? by DrTony1(m): 10:39am On Mar 28, 2009
Guy U are too much. @woodpecker, thats a prototype/masterpiece tiniyata gave U there.
@tinyata, did U later find the Queen of ur Heart?? I feel U man, U r a love doctor
Re: How Do I Get The "old" Her Back? by touchmeder: 10:58am On Mar 28, 2009
tiniyata:

Since u love her so much,Sit her down,tell her 'baby,u have been so wonderful lately,but ur old self made more sense to me.I know we're all humans are we are bound to make mistakes,n i know i must have offended u one way or the other either consciously or in my sub-consciousness,but i say i'm sorry.But if the reason for ur recent change is because u have something botherin u,then i wanna be a part of it.Remember how we started,u've always been all i have n my source of joy,i wouldn't want to let u go cos i would loose a hold of life itself.U're going to kill me emotionally n physically,n i will be ridiculed.I know u're not that bad,but sweetheart,d truth is that i'm scared i'm loosin u,n i dont want to get to that point,whatever it is u want me to do,u just tell me,cos u're one thing i just cant let go in this world,cos u're my wealth here on earth'.

guy you get am 100%. Even a heart of stone will melt and reconsider if told something like that. sometimes being involved in a relationship for such a long time has such effects.3 years in your case. when you are too used to something there is a tendency to sort of lose touch over time. there are ways of rekindling it back those things you say she used to do. for starters do them yourself and see if she will not reciprocate. also speak to her again. in my case my bf just spoke to me and when he used the words''ure not the way you used to be,i feel like m loosing you that touched me'' i knew he spoke the truth and i tried to make a conscious effort. the change was not immediate but i kept working on it. its alot better now. ure lucky she ws like that in the first place. dont worry she'd get it back. good luck
Re: How Do I Get The "old" Her Back? by Ifedisky(m): 11:58am On Mar 28, 2009
Bros look inwards. Do you think you've started sounding repetitive and boring? Is there a chance that your shared values are changing in different directions? Did she pick up new friends, new interests? You've got to re-evaluate. Sometimes the things that made us happy today might not have the same effect on us tomorrow, so we should "grow" alongside our mates. I don't believe asking "pointed" questions will do here. You've got to be intuitive+perceptive. Listen to her body language you'll learn from there. You can call a "conference" then if all fails. Cheers
Re: How Do I Get The "old" Her Back? by Nobody: 12:03pm On Mar 28, 2009
@dr. Tony,thanks alot,n i've found myself the queen of my heart.I have never had any problem askin ladies out,cos i de try on my own.All the ladies i've gone out with never do want to leave me alone,cos they always tell me i'm d best n they'll die without me.But i need to move on. I once loved a girl so much that most people thought i was psychotic,they never knew i was so in love,hence the eccentric attitude.But i later found myself an angel,who happen to b my prettiest amongst women,n my heartbeat.We've been going out for over 5yrs now,n i hope to marry her,cos life without her is 'i just dont want to think about it'
Re: How Do I Get The "old" Her Back? by Woodpecker(m): 1:08pm On Mar 28, 2009
thanks 4 the comments, but the thing is i'm not saying we're growing apart its just that she just doesnt make the extra effort she used to when things were still fresh. she acts like we've been married for 10yrs and its really frustrating. its like i'm the only one who still makes the extra and i'm being taken 4 granted
Re: How Do I Get The "old" Her Back? by Czarskit(m): 2:21pm On Mar 28, 2009
. . . Bossy Gf. . . shocked
Re: How Do I Get The "old" Her Back? by Woodpecker(m): 2:38pm On Mar 28, 2009
@czar
she's the not bossy @ all, on the contrary she usually allows me have my- infact shes almost perfect- the only down side is her lack of effort. am thinking of makin her jealous by tellin her abt stuff other girls do for me. maybe then she'll sit up
Re: How Do I Get The "old" Her Back? by DeReloaded: 5:59pm On Mar 28, 2009
Elebi! In what other way hasnt she shown her love anymore? No more gifts abi?

What dude whines about not getting a birthday present sef?

Adodi oshi.

she's sick of your gay ways which is why she has become cold.
Re: How Do I Get The "old" Her Back? by DeReloaded: 6:01pm On Mar 28, 2009
Woodpecker:

he only down side is her lack of effort. am thinking of makin her jealous by tellin her abt stuff other girls do for me. maybe then she'll sit up

You're a teenager. Yea please tell her about how other girls buy you things. Akuse.
Re: How Do I Get The "old" Her Back? by 4Play(m): 6:09pm On Mar 28, 2009
If someone starts a relationship doing certain favors but suddenly stops, the other half is right to query why the favors stopped. Not so much out of a sense of entitlement but natural curiosity as to whether the sudden change is a sign of waning of affection.
Re: How Do I Get The "old" Her Back? by DeReloaded: 6:11pm On Mar 28, 2009
Be that as it may $Play, would you agree with this daft plan of mentioning things other "women do for him". How will that look to her from someone that she's supposedly gonna marry soon?

If feelings were waning now, he'll see what they will become after he spews such juvenile garbage.
Re: How Do I Get The "old" Her Back? by Treetop20(m): 6:11pm On Mar 28, 2009
post
did you appreciate her when she was doing all that?
if not, maybe she got fed up of doing things that she
never got appreciated for.
Re: How Do I Get The "old" Her Back? by 4Play(m): 6:19pm On Mar 28, 2009
TOH, sorry Ma. I tend to read only the first and the last posts in a thread before responding.
Re: How Do I Get The "old" Her Back? by Woodpecker(m): 6:26pm On Mar 28, 2009
@4PLAY u seem to be one of the few mature respondents
as 4 the others that cant stop showing their obvious immaturity i'll explain it further;
she used to put some effort b4 and now she doesnt, its like shes just participating in the relationship whereas b4 she was the one who practically was always putting 80% of the effort. i guess now its a case of "sebi we've settled down so why stress myself?"
Re: How Do I Get The "old" Her Back? by DeReloaded: 7:05pm On Mar 28, 2009
4 Play:

TOH, sorry Ma. I tend to read only the first and the last posts in a thread before responding.

You are forgiven tongue

He pretty much wants her to put more in the relationship then he does like she used to and he wants to use a juvenile trick to get that.
Re: How Do I Get The "old" Her Back? by Nobody: 7:07pm On Mar 28, 2009
Well my case is quite simple;
AV been dating this wonderful girl for the last 3yrs but the problem is that at the beginning of the relationship she was the one who was all over me, she used to buy me gifts, she was always calling to know how i was.
Can someone say suga boy? undecided
Re: How Do I Get The "old" Her Back? by Woodpecker(m): 7:17pm On Mar 28, 2009
i take that statement personal ebony, i've always been responsible- or does ur low IQ not allow u to understand what i've been posting?
she used to do her own part or are relationships now about what a guy can give and the girl can receive? what happened to mutual responsiblities?
Re: How Do I Get The "old" Her Back? by Nobody: 7:24pm On Mar 28, 2009
Woodpecker:

i take that statement personal ebony, i've always been responsible- or does ur low IQ not allow u to understand what i've been posting?
she used to do her own part or are relationships now about what a guy can give and the girl can receive? what happened to mutual responsiblities?
Ehrmmmm, so what should I do if you take it personal.
Anywaz. . .

This is a before and after scenario.
Before she used to buy everything, she was all over you, she used to buy you gifts, ALWAYS calling. . . .Oh now we have a problem. . . .because she's not worshiping you and buying you stuff anymore.

am thinking of making her jealous by telling her abt stuff other girls do for me. maybe then she'll sit up
Does this method ever work?

Tell her, then come back and tell us the result.

I'm 100% behind you wink
Re: How Do I Get The "old" Her Back? by DeReloaded: 10:01pm On Mar 28, 2009
He dey yarn IQ yet he's the one devising a plan that only a retarded kindergartner would think of.
Re: How Do I Get The "old" Her Back? by Nobody: 10:04pm On Mar 28, 2009
the old her is there, it just got tired of giving and giving without getting anything back. You enjoyed her being all over you and you got complacent, thinking she'd see the sun rise off your head for life.

You've simply talked about you, you, you and you. Have you bothered to ask what you give her in return?
Re: How Do I Get The "old" Her Back? by Nobody: 10:07pm On Mar 28, 2009
Woodpecker:

@czar
she's the not bossy @ all, on the contrary she usually allows me have my- infact shes almost perfect- the only down side is her lack of effort. am thinking of makin her jealous by tellin her abt stuff other girls do for me. maybe then she'll sit up

Or maybe she'll just up and leave for someone else?
Re: How Do I Get The "old" Her Back? by osisi2(f): 10:17pm On Mar 28, 2009
Woodpecker:

@czar
she's the not bossy @ all, on the contrary she usually allows me have my- infact shes almost perfect- the only down side is her lack of effort. am thinking of makin her jealous by tellin her abt stuff other girls do for me. maybe then she'll sit up

Oh no you didn't ! shocked shocked shocked
Thank God the girl is beginning to see that she's wasted 3 solid years of her life with a loser.
Hopefully she'll close her legs wave you a final goodbye
Re: How Do I Get The "old" Her Back? by osisi2(f): 10:25pm On Mar 28, 2009
Well my case is quite simple;
AV been dating this wonderful girl for the last 3yrs but the problem is that at the beginning of the relationship she was the one who was all over me, she used to buy me gifts, she was always calling to know how i was

and what exactly did you bring into the relationship?
a needy personality?

. Now she rarley calls- only flashes- and its not like she doesnt buy credit, she hasnt given me jack since my birthday last yr, and she'd rather spend time with her friends than me.

and some people say miracles ended with the apostles cool
That God she now has a life and is using her money for better things.
Go buy youself chewing gum and tom tom

i know guys r meant to be the ones in charge but right now it seems like shes the one at the helm of affairs. shes very beautiful and loves me to pieces- she tells everyone who cares to listen- but the problem is that she doesnt show it anymore(apart from the sex )

The sex part will soon fade away,give her some time.
her eyes don begin clear small small
very soon you'll be history

.
i just need advise on how to get the old her back cos i miss her like crazy

You miss the pampering and gifts,is she your mother?
Don't you know the way to Balogun and other markets?

ps- we're planning on gettin married in the future so i'll be needing the old her soon

It won't work
you are planning on getting married,her plans have changed.
Go find another "mommy Christmas"
Re: How Do I Get The "old" Her Back? by osisi2(f): 10:27pm On Mar 28, 2009
2nd paragraph should have read "Thank God " not "that God"

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