The other day, I was talking to a male acquaintance whose one-time girlfriend had been a friend of mine, which I had been aware of ended because he refused to get married after three years of being together. He was complaining to me of how his house had been turned into a “base” by his friends, and how he never had any moments of peace any longer, and how he was wondering what to do about the situation. I remarked that perhaps, he ought to get married.

“who needs a woman?” was his reply. “I don’t know anyway. I don’t have the time to be attached to any woman Emotional attachment divides a man’s heart, and God did not create man with two heart.”
“So what do you intend to do?” I asked.
I don’t know, I just know that I have to do something” he replied.
“do you have househelp?” I asked again.
“yes, but a househelp is no good. He can’t stop them from storming my place. Perhaps, I’ll just get a woman to live with me.”
“As a wife?” I asked him.
“No, just a live – if she’s lucky.”
I didn’t say anything to that. I gave him a murderous look, quickly said good-bye and walked away. I was so furious.
Why are men such Hypocrites? Why do they have to adopt this love em- and –leave-em- attitude? I have since found out the answer. It is because they are afraid; afraid of how much power the women really have over them. The power that women can wield over them if they stay long enough.
You hear a man brag to his friend of how he is keeping a particular woman. Asked him if she is to be his wife and he will shout. “What for?”
Some other time, you hear another bachelor boy say to his friend, “Boy you needs to get married-o; this kin life no fit continue.” Why does he need a wife? Bed partner? Housemaid? Housekeeper? All these he can get without getting married. The simple truth is he can’t take care of himself. He needs someone to do that for him. His friends can’t do that for him, because they are men like himself, same sides of a coin. Only woman can, with her patience, strength of character, her terrific reserves of determination, her power. Whether they admit it or not, men like to be bossed by their mothers, their wives, their mistresses, their girlfriends.
Men! They are such contradictory human beings. They yell one thing and want another. It was a man who said: “Many of us men are Narcissist by nature, we want to have access to other people’s privacy and yet make ours top secret.”
Men are such pathetic pest. They are always calling women weak, dumb, chicken-brained etc. the fact is, that is the way they’d prefer women to be. They can’t handle strong women. When the women refuse to be suppressed, they label them bitches. The fact is men are the dumb ones. They realize that and fight it. The effort turns them into hypocrites. Putting up macho-images, Facades all! Underneath the layers there’s nothing but vanity, fickleness. That’s just what they are. Empty!
What does a man prove by “capturing” a girl, insisting on knowing her every move, then suddenly dropping her after years of being kept prisoner. He goes on to another, saying she’s not what he wants. What pride is there for you men to have up to six different girls call on you in a day? What does a man prove by marrying thirty-eight women in fifteen years? If God had intended to create women as games of soccer for men, he would have moulded us in the shape of footballs.
Everywhere you go, you encounter cases of male chauvinism. Men trying to assert themselves, trying to impose themselves on women. You hear a man say, “A man has got to be a man”. To prove what? Male superiority over the female? Men sternly oppose the idea of giving a woman free hand because thy see it as equivalent to surrendering the so-called Male superiority. Most Nigerian men are conservative. They believe they must be the bosses where women are involved.
Teel me, what you would think of a woman, abandon and in the depths of distress, who did not try to get herself out of such a state of affairs. You would say she was a slowpoke. We know of so many families who couldn’t have survived today if not for the women who had to take drastic action to salvage the situation. There was once a story in one of the news dailies about a woman who had to collect bones and castaway of meat from the butchers to feed her family. There are many cases of women who had to raise up their kids single-handedly because the men had scurried off in times of hardship, chickened out. Women have more resilience, more strength than most men.
We have heard of the maximum-“stand firmly by what you believe is right.” Tell me how many men who have poor suffering relatives in the villages, but spend their money trying to impress unsuspecting young ladies in the cities; who would go to great pains to cater for the needs of a girlfriend rather than pay thy fees of a younger brother. I can hear some guilty men arguing, “But it’s the young ladies that harass the men into giving in,” isn’t it the men who always brag, “There are many fishes in the sea?” shouldn’t their reasoning prevail over by a woman, it proves he’s the dumb one.
Talk about the uncompromising feminist enjoying her liberation from the “chauvinistic Adams.” And the men claiming they can’t. when a woman tries to assert herself, to demand that the relationship for once goes her way, on her own terms, the man cannot handle that. He screams, “Frustrated bitch.”
I have found out one thing. A man may be able to help you find happiness, for a very short while, at the end of which you’ll realize, when you weigh your loss, that the bad and the ugly were much more than the good.
The truth is: a man feels his masculinity is affronted “if the woman has the upper hand, his inadequacies would be expose”.
I once read somewhere, “if what men fear is that women might succumb to their masculine attraction, why did they not institute veils for themselves?
I ESTIMATE that by 2010, any guy marrying will be marrying a lady that has a SEX record of 100times & for ladies, a guy that can't even remember how many girls he has dated let alone screwed!!
copy from my http:www.timmywaters..com (this article is copyrighted)

long story!

long story but makes sense-any man who fear marriage coz of failure is a coward.

no problem nah!

when he's taking his oldest kid to kindergarten with his grey hairs, his mates' kids from their wives will be graduating college.

He should continue to enjoy his life jo. Nothing spoil.

long story sha. Only read the first part.

They can’t handle strong women. When the women refuse to be suppressed, they label them bitches. The fact is men are the dumb ones. They realize that and fight it.



How so true. many of the single ladies I know in their thirties are those who know what they want at any particular time, they are hard working individuals who do not believe in mediocrity and in Nigeria where I live, you go tey well well for your papa house with these qualities while all the dummies get married because they are exactly what the men need to boost their ego. Human beings generally feel better around people who they know will never see their faults, no matter how a correction comes men generally do not like being corrected so they would rather stay with someone who they know will never see their inadequacies.Many bachelors often say they want to marry intelligent women only to call the woman 'know know' when he meets her. Maybe the female child should not be educated after all so that any man we see goes even if he has an 1Q of -10!

tpia.:
no problem nah!

when he's taking his oldest kid to kindergarten with his grey hairs, his mates' kids from their wives will be graduating college.

He should continue to enjoy his life jo. Nothing spoil.

long story sha. Only read the first part.

Good advice

Shinatu:
many of the single ladies I know in their thirties are those who know what they want at any particular time, they are hard working individuals who do not believe in mediocrity and in Nigeria where I live, you go tey well well for your papa house with these qualities while all the dummies get married because they are exactly what the men need to boost their ego.

Even with the decline in marriage, the majority (read >50%) of women still get married by their mid-thirties. As a woman, are you seriously coming on here to say a majority of women are dummies

What a write up

Cool

Whre my keke napep I wan reach calivonia nw....

A woman who knows her onion and keeps to it will always find it difficult with men of this day. They find those women hard to crack therefore they chicken out. Many men want submissive women, a woman that will ignore their ills. A woman who will strictly adhere to his rules and face her job of cooking and giving birth. But, lucky is the man who marries these women because on the long run, they get the real fulfillment of marriage. I told a woman about her bill some days back, you know what her reply was "let me tell my husband". Chai! I said "which kind woman be dis?" A woman who knows her onion will sort the problem there without calling her husband but later tell her husband she had taken care of the problem. We find those women who know their onions bossy and very hard to manipulate. So we get scared of the future.

I think its both ways, women as well as men play that game of hypocrisy bt I personally think it tilt more on the side of the woman.

ok

2009 thread made it to the front page.
my brothers and sisters in christ, who say i no go make am this year!

well...

Very balanced article. Most men especially Nigerian men are confused babies. They want the other to be an open book while they keep a blind one to do as they wish.

If different rules apply to people based on their gender in a relationship then i don't think that's a relationship; more like a master and slave thing. That's why you see most of them scurrying away from women who can assert themselves. Running with their tails in between their legs like cowards and making excuses like she's so stubborn, arrogant bla bla bla.


They want to judge the other but don't want to be judged. They want accountability but won't apply same ideals to their own dealings with their partner.

Although we are seeing a new breed of men though still in the minority who believe men and women are equal but they just have differing roles and characteristics and same rules must apply to both parties at all times. That's what you call a MAN not the excuse of men we majorly have now.

Ok

Bla bla bla. Nne if you are not married go and get married. If someone comes here to spew all the rubbish about Nigerian female doublestandards i am sure it will be too much to be read.
Enough of al this gender bashin. We all have our shortcomings. Please

Yipeeeee! Male bashing thread! Have a field day ladies!

Hmn..anyone who demands a Saint for a life partner, must first of all DIE!

Who cares about the hypocrisy of men?
If u are a hypocrite, you are on your own o (oyo)

NL my NL hasn't been the same since that hacking...Diariz God sha

since 2009 why is it making front page now in 2014

you can't blame those poor girls. Must of them want to marry and they are welling to do anything possible to make there man happy so that they won't be dump but funny enough they still get dump.

So life is all about luck. Even if you get dump. Keep trying. You real man is waiting for you. ( this for the poor ladies oooooo ) no be for those way don useless there life com de find one poor dude like me to give bottom pot to chop when the real meal is gone

Why did she suggest marriage to him in the first place? Must everything be about marriage?

Ma broda once bitten twice shy besides it depends on the man and his situation

And dis made frontpage!!!! Nl is turning into smth else

Hmmm

Av u eva wondered why most men prefers to deal with others of their kind? Nope?
Ok..
Becos d average woman is just nagging, demanding, never understanding, and I'm sorry to say thism 'dumb to see the future'

Mosst men are not scared to get married, but a typical lady kills such ambition during courtship.
Why a typical man plans for his future, spends prudently, and manages his resources, a lady wil come in to eat it 'now', want it 'now', and expect the man to make more.

A woman doesn't understand why u av it bt doesn't want to spend it 'now', since u will still make more tomao....

She doesn't understand why u want to spend time alone this weekend to think, she won't see how dealing with a maniac is a good deal this time, and dinning with the devil is what is needed now. They have no foresight, no plan, no thought.

It is rare to see someone who bilivs in ur dream and drinks the garri with u as u save to achieve it.

So, yes, most of us are afraid because of the stories we hear, the preamble we see during dating, the weird thoughts we hear from ur complains, and the wanton actions u just want to be in romance with.

Not all ladies though, but the good ones are so rare!!!

I thought men and women are now equal and whatever a man can do, women can do better. What's stopping the ladies going ahead to pay the bride price of men? The fact is ladies; you cant eat your cake and have it. We men have equally seen the 'light'. We cherish our freedoms now more than ever. The funniest thing is even at 80 years, we can still deliver while our women these days enter menopause at late thirties and early forties these days.

God knoweth how the journey of a man will go.