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My Husband Always Shouts At Me In Public - Family (6) - Nairaland

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Re: My Husband Always Shouts At Me In Public by beautiful232(f): 9:58pm On Nov 14, 2016
no point shouting back at him

remember two wrongs don't make a right.

Cause when it's happen now, people will blame you for talking back at your husband

the best thing is sit him down,and let him know how he makes you feel by always shouting at you!!

hopefully he would change!!!

best of luck.....but all this things they put person fear for body to marry sef
Re: My Husband Always Shouts At Me In Public by johnson232: 10:00pm On Nov 14, 2016
Op i think this has got to do with your hubby temperament... U need to study his mood & always know when to distant yourself from him when he is in a bad mood...

He loves u... but this is a temperamental issue..
Re: My Husband Always Shouts At Me In Public by rolams(m): 10:02pm On Nov 14, 2016
Take care of ur self
Re: My Husband Always Shouts At Me In Public by berrystunn(m): 10:02pm On Nov 14, 2016
thewife306:
Before anyone would ask if he wasn't like this before marriage. No he wasn't. He never cautioned me harshly in private not to talk of in public.
When we were newly married he shouts at me in his younger brother's presence. (Why will they give me respect)
He did it in the presence of our plumber cos I told him the prices of the items were expensive.
Then our househelp. He does it so often that I begin to wonder what point he was trying to prove. To the extent that the lady started losing respect for me and giving me attitude anytime I caution her. That he even told her not to do what I asked her to do.
Then the most recent was in church. He was struggling wit our toddler that he fell and I asked him to leave him. He just started shouting and everyone was looking.
I really am not happy. And unknown to him, this is reducing my love for him. Cos i cant love someone dat disrespects me. I use to love telling people how wonderful he is but these days I cant. It's affecting my relationship with him.
I'm considering embarrassing him back the next time he does it so he knows how it hurts cos he doesn't see anything wrong with it and never apologize. He says he doesn't like hiding his feelings. I ask "even when your words hurt your spouse".
I'm worried cos we might be travelling soon and if he embarrases me in front of family members i might lose my temper.
I need mature advises here pls. As i do not want to involve 3rd party.

Sorry to tell you... your husband have someone out side....

What's the age difference between you and your husband
Re: My Husband Always Shouts At Me In Public by johnson232: 10:03pm On Nov 14, 2016
dangotesmummy:
I agree
how is dangote? cool
Re: My Husband Always Shouts At Me In Public by blesoh(f): 10:04pm On Nov 14, 2016
Who good girl help, madam you are too soft, my husband once did this to me I kept quiet, the next time in his mother's present mehn I shout back,ever since then the shout finish, and he's a very shy person if you shout at him in public so madam know your husband weak point so whenever he shouts at you, you give it to him.
Re: My Husband Always Shouts At Me In Public by engrolawei: 10:04pm On Nov 14, 2016
thewife306:

Thanks Sis
I like what ishilov said. To add to that, women's tears can break a strong man's heart. Sometimes even when my wife goes wrong if I'm angry, when o ce I see her tears I get soft and handle matters with care. I'll advice when next he shouts at you in public, change your mood and let your tears flow freely but don't utter a word. This will break his heart and make everyone around give him an odd look that will make him think twice before repeating such an attitude. Watch out how he will even apologise to you in public and things will change for the better. Keep being a good wife. GOD help you.

1 Like

Re: My Husband Always Shouts At Me In Public by pellucid(m): 10:05pm On Nov 14, 2016
read the bible all u need is there
wait 1st is ur husband a nlers if yes tell im to come and see diz post
Re: My Husband Always Shouts At Me In Public by goshen26: 10:06pm On Nov 14, 2016
thewife306:
Before anyone would ask if he wasn't like this before marriage. No he wasn't. He never cautioned me harshly in private not to talk of in public.
When we were newly married he shouts at me in his younger brother's presence. (Why will they give me respect)
He did it in the presence of our plumber cos I told him the prices of the items were expensive.
Then our househelp. He does it so often that I begin to wonder what point he was trying to prove. To the extent that the lady started losing respect for me and giving me attitude anytime I caution her. That he even told her not to do what I asked her to do.
Then the most recent was in church. He was struggling wit our toddler that he fell and I asked him to leave him. He just started shouting and everyone was looking.
I really am not happy. And unknown to him, this is reducing my love for him. Cos i cant love someone dat disrespects me. I use to love telling people how wonderful he is but these days I cant. It's affecting my relationship with him.
I'm considering embarrassing him back the next time he does it so he knows how it hurts cos he doesn't see anything wrong with it and never apologize. He says he doesn't like hiding his feelings. I ask "even when your words hurt your spouse".
I'm worried cos we might be travelling soon and if he embarrases me in front of family members i might lose my temper.
I need mature advises here pls. As i do not want to involve 3rd party.


Pls Ma loosing ur temper is not the best ooo, those people supporting u to shout back at him are only trying to help with a vehicle that will help with ur luggage wen ur marriage is over....pls pm
me iI have a message from a woman of God about marital issue like this, I have given it to many couple and they are giving glory to God, urs won't b different... Pls yelling at him is not the solution pls ma, I'm begging u in the name of God......the only challenge is to watch when he will be in good mood to listen to the message with u, I bet u by God's grace u will smile
Re: My Husband Always Shouts At Me In Public by warmachine(m): 10:06pm On Nov 14, 2016
JeffreyJamez:
This is simple... I'm sure you have your own "craze"..since you have talked to him about it and he has refused to listen, show him that small "craze" ..if he shouts at you, shout at him back... He go calm down!


Dumb advice...you could spark up rubbish there!
Re: My Husband Always Shouts At Me In Public by dangotesmummy: 10:07pm On Nov 14, 2016
johnson232:

how is dangote? cool
he's Fine. He has gone to sleep cool

He has to wake up early tomorrow hence his decision to go to bed on time cool

2 Likes

Re: My Husband Always Shouts At Me In Public by Nobody: 10:09pm On Nov 14, 2016
Being nice only work so for so long ...The only way someone learns is if they experience something. It's time for him to experience the very assertive you. In public as well since he so found of embrassing you. And another thing find a new house help next thing she will be walking half naked in your own home.
Re: My Husband Always Shouts At Me In Public by goshen26: 10:10pm On Nov 14, 2016
blesoh:
Who good girl help, madam you are too soft, my husband once did this to me I kept quiet, the next time in his mother's present mehn I shout back,ever since then the shout finish, and he's a very shy person if you shout at him in public so madam know your husband weak point so whenever he shouts at you, you give it to him.

U r definitely not married or a product of broken home...I'm sorry if I'm too harsh, but that is not the best advice
Re: My Husband Always Shouts At Me In Public by Vizzim: 10:15pm On Nov 14, 2016
Op, i really don't think shouting at him will solve the problem rather cause more damage to your precious marriage. Men don't like embarrassment at all not sure your husband do too. I recommend you sit with him and let him understands how your feeling and how he's hurting you. The funny thing is that he does not know until you open up to him. I hope your caution with your actions and words as well and be patient with him. Finally pray for him
Re: My Husband Always Shouts At Me In Public by Nobody: 10:15pm On Nov 14, 2016
JeffreyJamez:
This is simple... I'm sure you have your own "craze"..since you have talked to him about it and he has refused to listen, show him that small "craze" ..if he shouts at you, shout at him back... He go calm down!
that is part of my friends wahala in her marriage ooo.. CUs she doesn't talk back he talks anyhow.. The day she spoke back e be like say nah ice water Dem pour am..the love is dead an gone..
Re: My Husband Always Shouts At Me In Public by Nobody: 10:17pm On Nov 14, 2016
goshen26:


U r definitely not married or a product of broken home...I'm sorry if I'm too harsh, but that is not the best advice
some of our men love learning the hard way..
Re: My Husband Always Shouts At Me In Public by Nobody: 10:18pm On Nov 14, 2016
goshen26:



Pls Ma loosing ur temper is not the best ooo, those people supporting u to shout back at him are only trying to help with a vehicle that will help with ur luggage wen ur marriage is over....pls pm
me iI have a message from a woman of God about marital issue like this, I have given it to many couple and they are giving glory to God, urs won't b different... Pls yelling at him is not the solution pls ma, I'm begging u in the name of God......the only challenge is to watch when he will be in good mood to listen to the message with u, I bet u by God's grace u will smile
I see u god mother.. Abegi
Re: My Husband Always Shouts At Me In Public by kollysnut(m): 10:18pm On Nov 14, 2016
Increase the number of sex, u have with him. He will cool down, my gf did with me and work like magic, work stress was killing me den, I don't knw who told her, hv anger problem. After she increase the number of sex, I begin to cool down. Nw I am as calm as anytin. Sex is good in marriage. Am not married yet, but soon, n it has help ma relationship gan. We fight, we shout we argue, then end it on hot sex.

Pls do not shout back, I repeat do not.
Re: My Husband Always Shouts At Me In Public by Nobody: 10:20pm On Nov 14, 2016
My sister life is not a bed of roses, in fact I don't know what is happening this days in our marriages. Exactly what is happening to you is what am experiencing. In my own case, my wife is just too stubborn, if fact I have regretted marrying her, she doesn't only shouts on in publicly, she does not have any quantum of respect for me, she does not see me as her husband, our relationship is strictly formal, dead sex life at just 3 years of marriage
Honestly I know am a good man to her and I know I love her but she doesn't value my love. Am not contemplating divorce now because nobody in my family would support it having warned me against marrying her in the past. They said they see her as a stubborn lady who will be difficult to control. I knew her type before I married her. I complained about her attitude that time she promised to change. But now am going crazy. Am alone!
Re: My Husband Always Shouts At Me In Public by delishpot: 10:25pm On Nov 14, 2016
Wait till you guys are alone and then tell him two can play that game. If he wants you to be how the Bible said, he should also remember that the Bible also told him how to be too. Bible is not one sided. Unfortunately, many have decided to translate the Bible to mean men are excused and only women are held liable for their own short coming. Fafafa fowl. Jesus did not say men should respect their wives only when they "submit"


yemi1261:
My sister life is not a bed of roses, in fact I don't know what is happening this days in our marriages. Exactly what is happening to you is what am experiencing. In my own case, my wife is just too stubborn, if fact I have regretted marrying her, she doesn't only shouts on in publicly, she does not have any quantum of respect for me, she does not see me as her husband, our relationship is strictly formal, dead sex life at just 3 years of marriage
Honestly I know am a good man to her and I know I love her but she doesn't value my love. Am not contemplating divorce now because nobody in my family would support it having warned me against marrying her in the past. They said they see her as a stubborn lady who will be difficult to control. I knew her type before I married her. I complained about her attitude that time she promised to change. But now am going crazy. Am alone!


When I advice people in relationship not to go ahead with the marriage if their parents are against it, people term me to be a bad person claiming they are marrying the boy/girl and not their parents, love conquers all etc. Until you hit hard time in marriage, you would never know that love alone is not enough to keep a marriage happy. When shit hits the fan, shebi Na still parents you go expect to escort you go resolve am? Its well. All the best bro, may only the best happen to ya.
Re: My Husband Always Shouts At Me In Public by Ovokoo: 10:26pm On Nov 14, 2016
Like some said, shout at him back and he will get the message clear like HD.
Re: My Husband Always Shouts At Me In Public by Katyusha(m): 10:30pm On Nov 14, 2016
thewife306:
Before anyone would ask if he wasn't like this before marriage. No he wasn't. He never cautioned me harshly in private not to talk of in public.
When we were newly married he shouts at me in his younger brother's presence. (Why will they give me respect)
He did it in the presence of our plumber cos I told him the prices of the items were expensive.
Then our househelp. He does it so often that I begin to wonder what point he was trying to prove. To the extent that the lady started losing respect for me and giving me attitude anytime I caution her. That he even told her not to do what I asked her to do.
Then the most recent was in church. He was struggling wit our toddler that he fell and I asked him to leave him. He just started shouting and everyone was looking.
I really am not happy. And unknown to him, this is reducing my love for him. Cos i cant love someone dat disrespects me. I use to love telling people how wonderful he is but these days I cant. It's affecting my relationship with him.
I'm considering embarrassing him back the next time he does it so he knows how it hurts cos he doesn't see anything wrong with it and never apologize. He says he doesn't like hiding his feelings. I ask "even when your words hurt your spouse".
I'm worried cos we might be travelling soon and if he embarrases me in front of family members i might lose my temper.
I need mature advises here pls. As i do not want to involve 3rd party.
Is he mad? Other women would treat his fuckup. You dropped your fathers name,took his, and placed your future in his hands. Draw the fucking line now. As for your housemaid, a few slaps will do the magic.
Re: My Husband Always Shouts At Me In Public by eniwhy: 10:30pm On Nov 14, 2016
The best way to handle the situation is to purposely yell at him in public when ever you found fault in him and after that day apologize to him. He would reason properly.
thewife306:
Before anyone would ask if he wasn't like this before marriage. No he wasn't. He never cautioned me harshly in private not to talk of in public.
When we were newly married he shouts at me in his younger brother's presence. (Why will they give me respect)
He did it in the presence of our plumber cos I told him the prices of the items were expensive.
Then our househelp. He does it so often that I begin to wonder what point he was trying to prove. To the extent that the lady started losing respect for me and giving me attitude anytime I caution her. That he even told her not to do what I asked her to do.
Then the most recent was in church. He was struggling wit our toddler that he fell and I asked him to leave him. He just started shouting and everyone was looking.
I really am not happy. And unknown to him, this is reducing my love for him. Cos i cant love someone dat disrespects me. I use to love telling people how wonderful he is but these days I cant. It's affecting my relationship with him.
I'm considering embarrassing him back the next time he does it so he knows how it hurts cos he doesn't see anything wrong with it and never apologize. He says he doesn't like hiding his feelings. I ask "even when your words hurt your spouse".
I'm worried cos we might be travelling soon and if he embarrases me in front of family members i might lose my temper.
I need mature advises here pls. As i do not want to involve 3rd party.
Re: My Husband Always Shouts At Me In Public by Usmaniaaa: 10:34pm On Nov 14, 2016
U to shout at him in d other room...
Re: My Husband Always Shouts At Me In Public by Tajbol4splend(m): 10:43pm On Nov 14, 2016
Laveda:


I tell you, sometimes when you're too 'soft' for a man he treats you like trash.

Imagine shouting for her in public, she should look for a way to go about it if she has talked to him privately.

Believe me, if I marry and my wife accepts everything I say without a bit of criticism, I won't like it
Re: My Husband Always Shouts At Me In Public by Missmossy(f): 10:47pm On Nov 14, 2016
The comments here though grin marriage isn't for babies. May God not bring such a man my way, all those saying he loves you bla bla. Would a man hurt a woman he loves often?? Its a ridicule of the highest order.

So so embarrassing tell him how you feel without mincing words. You both are married already for better for worse. I hope he changes. I can't imagine how i would react to such a man. It is well with both of you.

3 Likes

Re: My Husband Always Shouts At Me In Public by ezy2: 10:48pm On Nov 14, 2016
thewife306:
Before anyone would ask if he wasn't like this before marriage. No he wasn't. He never cautioned me harshly in private not to talk of in public.
When we were newly married he shouts at me in his younger brother's presence. (Why will they give me respect)
He did it in the presence of our plumber cos I told him the prices of the items were expensive.
Then our househelp. He does it so often that I begin to wonder what point he was trying to prove. To the extent that the lady started losing respect for me and giving me attitude anytime I caution her. That he even told her not to do what I asked her to do.
Then the most recent was in church. He was struggling wit our toddler that he fell and I asked him to leave him. He just started shouting and everyone was looking.
I really am not happy. And unknown to him, this is reducing my love for him. Cos i cant love someone dat disrespects me. I use to love telling people how wonderful he is but these days I cant. It's affecting my relationship with him.
I'm considering embarrassing him back the next time he does it so he knows how it hurts cos he doesn't see anything wrong with it and never apologize. He says he doesn't like hiding his feelings. I ask "even when your words hurt your spouse".
I'm worried cos we might be travelling soon and if he embarrases me in front of family members i might lose my temper.
I need mature advises here pls. As i do not want to involve 3rd party.

My dear are u dumb..give him back immediately, that would teach him a lesson when next he opens his mouth to shout at you in public.
Re: My Husband Always Shouts At Me In Public by Nobody: 10:52pm On Nov 14, 2016
delishpot:
Wait till you guys are alone and then tell him two can play that game. If he wants you to be how the Bible said, he should also remember that the Bible also told him how to be too. Bible is not one sided. Unfortunately, many have decided to translate the Bible to mean men are excused and only women are held liable for their own short coming. Fafafa fowl. Jesus did not say men should respect their wives only when they "submit"..words of elders are words of wisdom





When I advice people in relationship not to go ahead with the marriage if their parents are against it, people term me to be a bad person claiming they are marrying the boy/girl and not their parents, love conquers all etc. Until you hit hard time in marriage, you would never know that love alone is not enough to keep a marriage happy. When shit hits the fan, shebi Na still parents you go expect to escort you go resolve am? Its well. All the best bro, may only the best happen to ya.
Re: My Husband Always Shouts At Me In Public by kidman96(m): 10:53pm On Nov 14, 2016
thewife306:
Before anyone would ask if he wasn't like this before marriage. No he wasn't. He never cautioned me harshly in private not to talk of in public.
When we were newly married he shouts at me in his younger brother's presence. (Why will they give me respect)
He did it in the presence of our plumber cos I told him the prices of the items were expensive.
Then our househelp. He does it so often that I begin to wonder what point he was trying to prove. To the extent that the lady started losing respect for me and giving me attitude anytime I caution her. That he even told her not to do what I asked her to do.
Then the most recent was in church. He was struggling wit our toddler that he fell and I asked him to leave him. He just started shouting and everyone was looking.
I really am not happy. And unknown to him, this is reducing my love for him. Cos i cant love someone dat disrespects me. I use to love telling people how wonderful he is but these days I cant. It's affecting my relationship with him.
I'm considering embarrassing him back the next time he does it so he knows how it hurts cos he doesn't see anything wrong with it and never apologize. He says he doesn't like hiding his feelings. I ask "even when your words hurt your spouse".
I'm worried cos we might be travelling soon and if he embarrases me in front of family members i might lose my temper.
I need mature advises here pls. As i do not want to involve 3rd party.

..."I'm considering embarrassing him back the next time he does it so he knows how it hurts... "

Best...but not in front of his family cos they won't understand how long he has been messing up.

You are not his subordinate. You are his spouse and you both have equal rights in the marriage. Trust me if you continue taking sh!t he will continue giving you sh!t. Do this and the next time he feels the urge to embarrass you he would think twice cos he doesn't know what he is gonna get.

1 Like

Re: My Husband Always Shouts At Me In Public by Nobody: 10:54pm On Nov 14, 2016
delishpot:
Wait till you guys are alone and then tell him two can play that game. If he wants you to be how the Bible said, he should also remember that the Bible also told him how to be too. Bible is not one sided. Unfortunately, many have decided to translate the Bible to mean men are excused and only women are held liable for their own short coming. Fafafa fowl. Jesus did not say men should respect their wives only when they "submit"..words of elders are words of wisdom





When I advice people in relationship not to go ahead with the marriage if their parents are against it, people term me to be a bad person claiming they are marrying the boy/girl and not their parents, love conquers all etc. Until you hit hard time in marriage, you would never know that love alone is not enough to keep a marriage happy. When shit hits the fan, shebi Na still parents you go expect to escort you go resolve am? Its well. All the best bro, may only the best happen to ya.
thanks a lot, your advise is noted
Re: My Husband Always Shouts At Me In Public by yoged(m): 11:04pm On Nov 14, 2016
JeffreyJamez:
This is simple... I'm sure you have your own "craze"..since you have talked to him about it and he has refused to listen, show him that small "craze" ..if he shouts at you, shout at him back... He go calm down!
don't even try this shit or else ready to pack your things.. Sit him down, talk to him. .cry in front of him and let him know you don't appreciate such attitude. Talk to an elderly person that knows him very well maybe his mom. On no account should you shout at your husband. Please don't use your hand to spoil all things you have worked for. .satan is a liar.
Re: My Husband Always Shouts At Me In Public by repogirl(f): 11:04pm On Nov 14, 2016
OP,you try!

I can understand losing ones temper once a while and lashing out but for him to do this consistently, it is definitely a problem.

I think there is a background problem which you are not seeing. There's something pushing him to do this, there's something he isn't telling you, because except he has mental problem, his behaviour is not normal.

I have no idea how you will get to the bottom of his issues o but me I cannot take that rubbish kind of attitude.

Stop bottling your own emotions, you will be bottling up what you feel and it's now turning into deep resentment.

If you need to lash out, pls do but don't over do o. You should let him know in strict terms that he can't talk down to you in public and you will not take that nonsense. Enough is enough abeg. If he has a problem with you, there are better ways to express himself than acting like a kid throwing a tantrum.

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