Ishilove:

Seriously twisted

Care to find out how seriously twisted it is? I promise to be gentle, each stroke will make you do a back stroke and a sigh...

@poster, I can relate to your story. I was like that some years ago. I had a terrible heart break that left me shattered for years. I was not ready for any rship again,my heart was really not open even though I had to try forcing it open sometimes. I hated having a date with anyone and if the person comes a minute late, I believed it was a big slight. He should be d one waiting for me, not d other way round. If u are a minute late, am off that venue and nothing ull say could make me change my mind. I abandoned a guy that came to see me all the way from ghana. D guy was a habitual late comer so I cannot count the no of times I abandoned d date. I feel it smacks of unseriousness and its an early sign DT it won't just work. Some could give reason from traffic...but it was none of my business.

But one thing ull know is, when your own comes, things just start falling into places on their own. I was chatting on wassap with hubby for abt a month. The first day we were to see, he came from Bayelsa to east to see me. We were to meet at shoprite by 6pm. I got there by 6pm (after work) and he was not there. I called him and raked. He pleaded traffic( as usual). I nearly left as usual but somehow didn't leave. We met... My heart started healing after I opened up to some friends things that have been bottled up in my heart for years.

Today we are married ane we are both happy.

Edited: u shld HV sent her a Facebook message when ur phone was stolen. Absence of call is no 1 tell tale sign that a guy isn't serious with u. For a new rship like yours, it could mean many things to her. She just doesn't need unserious ppl now and presumes you as one.

joseph1832:
Care to find out how seriously twisted it is? I promise to be gentle, each stroke will make you do a back stroke and a sigh...

While you release fluid with a thunderous "aahhh"

Ishilove:

While you release fluid with a thunderous "aahhh"

You have no idea. But why waste my fluid when it can swim inside you and say hi to your ovary. I'm sure you know the fusion will be 'explosive'.

gbosaa:


That's what happen when two smart and crafty people decide to date. The boy was lucky but you all should spare the girl.
They planned to meet, girl had already perfected plans to put some holes in his pocket on the first date but nigga had premonitions.
He came up with the armed robbery story because financially, he just wasn't that ready and psychologically he wasn't ready as he figured his physical world wasn't very consistent with his virtual. He would need a ride plus some cash to impress on the first date, not just speaking grammar and getting witty behind the monitor.

Girl got disappointed, her plans dashed, got very grumpy. The guy is smart and had the right words to lacerate her with and here we are reading how it all crashed.

my thoughts exactly. You too much

Mine is a possessive bf. Gets jealous easily. We still together tho.

eseh1:
hmmmm....there's really a thin line between love and hatred.

Couldn't agree more.

Would not have dragged it out that long on the first instantce if a late phonecall does indeed cause that much contrition then that indicidual has some deep seated psychological issues they need to address. I don't bear grudges or use forgiveness as some kind of bargaining tool. If slighted I say piece, if it's bigger than a slight I say what needs to be done and move on. We have one life and to harbour issues for long such long periods of time shows lack of emotional maturity.

Nobody is indispensable! There are a lot of beautiful women out there, y die cos of one?

alexistaiwo:
Ask my girlfriend and my exes, the higher my love for my partner the harder it is for me to forgive when things goes south.
I am presently working on myself because I noticed that I don't have a forgiving spirit. It is as a result of my childhood experiences so before you judge her. Try to know her story.
Nobody wishes to have a stony heart we are shaped by what life throws at us.

If only you had stayed a little longer she would have come around.

LazyAF:


So true. Worse is he didn't understand her but was thinking of only his side. Is a relationship all about one person?

Funny thing is, when you finally get this type of girl, she's yours forever.

I'd do exactly what she did but with a little twist and that is I'd let him explain himself and apologize and I'd accept his apologies but I won't let things go back to normal and I won't let us meet in person. Why? Because I can't turn a blind eye to early warning signals! It's pretty too early for a guy whom I've not met in person to start messing up my emotions and breaking my heart. I understand what that girl did, she was just trying to protect her heart from being broken again as once beaten is twice shy. I understand the fact that dude got robbed of his gadgets hence he couldn't communicate with her but he could have tried to get in touch with her if she truly means something to him. Dude is at fault here.

You don't expect someone who has experienced betrayals/disappointments/heartbreaks upadan to turn a blind eye to early warning signals!

TinaAnita:


I'd do exactly what she did but with a little twist and that is I'd let him explain himself and apologize and I'd accept his apologies but I won't let things go back to normal and I won't let us meet in person. Why? Because I can't turn a blind eye to early warning signals! It's pretty too early for a guy whom I've not met in person to start messing up my emotions and breaking my heart. I understand what that girl did, she was just trying to protect her heart from being broken again as once beaten is twice shy. I understand the fact that dude got robbed of his gadgets hence he couldn't communicate with her but he could have tried to get in touch with her if she truly means something to her. Dude is at fault here

He is a freelancer, which means his source of livelihood comes form his laptop and gadgets.

If you get robbed of something like that, would calling a guy you haven't met yet be the first thing on your mind?

wouldn't you be so demoralized and try to put up funds to get back on your feet?

wouldn't you be focused on how to get all your resources, contacts and clients back online?

Mind you, He only delayed the call. He DID get in contact with her.

As for me, I think writeboy is the real MVP here.

Dude did exactly what I would have done. Not a single different step.

He did not stand her up.

DMerciful:
Nobody is indispensable! There are a lot of beautiful women out there, y die cos of one?

Of course nobody is indispensable but you will agree with me that each and every one of us is unique in our own special ways.
So yes some people are actually indispensable.

I repeat nobody is indispensable. You meeting anybody in life is by time and chance. If you did not meet at all will you die?

alexistaiwo:

Of course nobody is indispensable but you will agree with me that each and every one of us is unique in our own special ways.
So yes some people are actually indispensable.

Greatbeard:


He is a freelancer, which means his source of livelihood comes form his laptop and gadgets.

If you get robbed of something like that, would calling a guy you haven't met yet be the first thing on your mind?

wouldn't you be so demoralized and try to put up funds to get back on your feet?

wouldn't you be focused on how to get all your resources, contacts and clients back online?

Mind you, He only delayed the call. He DID get in contact with her.

As for me, I think writeboy is the real MVP here.

Dude did exactly what I would have done. Not a single different step.

He did not stand her up.

Yes they haven't met in person but they had a great connection and chemistry which he confirmed. They always chat and chatted about everything. They were so into each other and to that effect such a person deserves to be informed of his setback. The fact that dude did not deem it necessarily to inform a lady he planned on meeting about his setbacks only means he never took her seriously. Dude can't tell me that he didn't inform his close pals or loved ones of the robbery incident? I guess he only informed those who matters to him while his online lover was ignored.

TinaAnita:


Yes they haven't met in person but they had a great connection and chemistry which he confirmed. They always chat and chatted about everything. They were so into each other and to that effect such a person deserves to be informed of his setback. The fact that dude did not deem it necessarily to inform a lady he planned on meeting about his setbacks only means he never took her seriously. Dude can't tell me that he didn't inform his close pals or loved ones of the robbery incident? I guess he only informed those who matters to him while his online lover was ignored.

DMerciful:
I repeat nobody is indispensable. You meeting anybody in life is by time and chance. If you did not meet at all will you die?

What about when you get to know them nko?

Anitateddy:
Mine is a possessive bf. Gets jealous easily. We still together tho.

Ok

TinaAnita:


I'd do exactly what she did but with a little twist and that is I'd let him explain himself and apologize and I'd accept his apologies but I won't let things go back to normal and I won't let us meet in person. Why? Because I can't turn a blind eye to early warning signals! It's pretty too early for a guy whom I've not met in person to start messing up my emotions and breaking my heart. I understand what that girl did, she was just trying to protect her heart from being broken again as once beaten is twice shy. I understand the fact that dude got robbed of his gadgets hence he couldn't communicate with her but he could have tried to get in touch with her if she truly means something to him. Dude is at fault here.

You don't expect someone who has experienced betrayals/disappointments/heartbreaks upadan to turn a blind eye to early warning signals!

Hmmmm.....these are the kind of people we all shud avoid. Endtime things

LazyAF:
I think I understand her point.

First, she really likes you but is trying to be cautious. She is a kind of person that hardly trust men, especially online guys.

So, this happens and her instincts told her, 'I told you so, this guy is not reliable. How convenient to say that he has been robbed after not keeping to his word. This guy is no good, I tell ya".

So, she backs off and blanks out.

For these kind of people, they need constant assurance that all is well and had you really really loved her like you said, you would have listened to her side of the story.

But instead, you said some demeaning things to her that made her instincts tell her, ' I told ya, this guy isn't worth it'.

Worse of all you brought it to nairaland and romance section that is full of toddlers so that people could applaud your actions? How matured are you?

#imo.

It's easy to judge when you are not the one who experienced it. I did the best I could do and yeah, I do feel bad that I went ballistic on her. She sent me some text messages trying to explain the situation but the damage in my opinion was done and there was no going back.

I really wish I didn't tell her off.

mamatwiny:
@poster, I can relate to your story. I was like that some years ago. I had a terrible heart break that left me shattered for years. I was not ready for any rship again,my heart was really not open even though I had to try forcing it open sometimes. I hated having a date with anyone and if the person comes a minute late, I believed it was a big slight. He should be d one waiting for me, not d other way round. If u are a minute late, am off that venue and nothing ull say could make me change my mind. I abandoned a guy that came to see me all the way from ghana. D guy was a habitual late comer so I cannot count the no of times I abandoned d date. I feel it smacks of unseriousness and its an early sign DT it won't just work. Some could give reason from traffic...but it was none of my business.

But one thing ull know is, when your own comes, things just start falling into places on their own. I was chatting on wassap with hubby for abt a month. The first day we were to see, he came from Bayelsa to east to see me. We were to meet at shoprite by 6pm. I got there by 6pm (after work) and he was not there. I called him and raked. He pleaded traffic( as usual). I nearly left as usual but somehow didn't leave. We met... My heart started healing after I opened up to some friends things that have been bottled up in my heart for years.

Today we are married ane we are both happy.

Edited: u shld HV sent her a Facebook message when ur phone was stolen. Absence of call is no 1 tell tale sign that a guy isn't serious with u. For a new rship like yours, it could mean many things to her. She just doesn't need unserious ppl now and presumes you as one.

Honestly, that thing scares me -- I mean extremely sensitive people who do not forgive or let go easily. My immediate family is like that and I know first hand how much strife and a generally in-conducive environment such behaviour breeds. I can't put up with such behaviour, it's a pet peeve. I don't take life too seriously, I expect people in my life to be the same.

I am really happy for you. Cheers

TinaAnita:


Yes they haven't met in person but they had a great connection and chemistry which he confirmed. They always chat and chatted about everything. They were so into each other and to that effect such a person deserves to be informed of his setback. The fact that dude did not deem it necessarily to inform a lady he planned on meeting about his setbacks only means he never took her seriously. Dude can't tell me that he didn't inform his close pals or loved ones of the robbery incident? I guess he only informed those who matters to him while his online lover was ignored.

He was to call on Friday. He got her call as soon as he turned his phone on. ON FRIDAY.

Do you understand what it means to have to go through a robbery? AND RECOVER IMMEDIATELY? keep in mind, the lost phones.

The truth is- she was impatient. childish and inconsiderate.

He got back online as soon as he could.

He didn't mention loved ones and that really isn't my concern.

Look. my point is A lady that acts like that has a lot more rash and irrational reactions where that came from.

MY QUESTION TO YOU

If your partner (boyfriend, fiancee) is in such a predicament. God forbid.Amen.

would you?

a) Get angry and break up because he didn't call quick.

b) Show simple human empathy for the victim

The world is about 7billion! What makes you think that person is the best life can offer you out of these 7 billion? Find more and you'll definitely meet better people. He meet her online and he like some of her personalities and he just discovered the one he doesn't like. If they were childhood friends and he had known her for ages and he says she's irreplaceable, I'd have understood. Mind you I used the would irreplaceable cos only God is indispensable!

alexistaiwo:

What about when you get to know them nko?

DMerciful:
The world is about 7billion! What makes you think that person is the best life can offer you out of these 7 billion? Find more and you'll definitely meet better people. He meet her online and he like some of her personalities and he just discovered the one he doesn't like. If they were childhood friends and he had known her for ages and he says she's irreplaceable, I'd have understood. Mind you I used the would irreplaceable cos only God is indispensable!

Thank God that you made mention of the fact that if he had known her from childhood she would be close to being indispensable.
I rest my case

Diplomaticbeing:
Let me digress from your main question. Actually, the unpronounced reason why the girl decided to discard you, albeit indirectly without you knowing - forget about the pronounced 9 months ish - was that the misfortune you encountered and relayed to her made it easy for her to know your financial worth. You fell below her expected class - financially. Thank your stars.

I agree with you...in the end the most important criteria for choosing a mate as far as most Nigerian ladies are concerned is finance!

....cheers man.

alexistaiwo:

Thank God that you made mention of the fact that if he had known her from childhood she would be close to being indispensable.
I rest my case

TinaAnita:


I'd do exactly what she did but with a little twist and that is I'd let him explain himself and apologize and I'd accept his apologies but I won't let things go back to normal and I won't let us meet in person. Why? Because I can't turn a blind eye to early warning signals! It's pretty too early for a guy whom I've not met in person to start messing up my emotions and breaking my heart. I understand what that girl did, she was just trying to protect her heart from being broken again as once beaten is twice shy. I understand the fact that dude got robbed of his gadgets hence he couldn't communicate with her but he could have tried to get in touch with her if she truly means something to him. Dude is at fault here.

You don't expect someone who has experienced betrayals/disappointments/heartbreaks upadan to turn a blind eye to early warning signals!

You ascribe so much importance to yourself. Early warning signs indeed.


Can you kindly look at the night sky and count the gazillions of stars and imagine what lies in those places. You would realise you are nothing but a shrapnel in the whole scheme of things.


He could have contacted her, but wtf. Why didn't she contact him when he was AWOL. Is it the job of a guy to always be the one to call and lookout for a girl, what happened to her trying to contact him on fb?......and he apologized and for someone you are just starting out with. That is more than enough. Who the hell is she ? King Jesus. What would happen if he breaks her heart? You would get a gun so as to correct that slight?


And when we probe further you all don't fu.c.ki.ng bring anything reasonable to the table except your over inflated egos and whatnot.

she is just dumb n stupid, I mean you didn't wrong her!!!!! even if she felt hurt, what was she expecting you to do in that scenario,some humans sha!!! I for one too don't forgive,though I hardly get mad at people,so whenever I exceed my tolerance level,it seems almost impossible to forgive, I just discard the fellow and move on.

x240:
You ascribe so much importance to yourself. Early warning signs indeed.


Can you kindly look at the night sky and count the gazillions of stars and imagine what lies in those places. You would realise you are nothing but a shrapnel in the whole scheme of things.


He could have contacted her, but wtf. Why didn't she contact him when he was AWOL. Is it the job of a guy to always be the one to call and lookout for a girl, what happened to her trying to contact him on fb?......and he apologized and for someone you are just starting out with. That is more than enough. Who the hell is she ? King Jesus. What would happen if he breaks her heart? You would get a gun so as to correct that slight?


And when we probe further you all don't fu.c.ki.ng bring anything reasonable to the table except your over inflated egos and whatnot.

THRASH!

Anitateddy:
Mine is a possessive bf. Gets jealous easily. We still together tho.

And would u blame him for dat?
Who wouldn't hvin someone fyn as u

mccoy47:
And would u blame him for dat? Who wouldn't hvin someone fyn as u

lol....tnx

Anitateddy:
lol....tnx

Was just stating the obvious.
Anyways, u'r wlcm