Pweety4me:

<sub>She is cheating Ooo. . .

Try again sha. . .never give up on d 1 u love. .</sub> .

rebranded:

From my experience, shes prob seeing someone else, and you probably drove her to it somehow,

'll say withstand the storm, be patient, no quarells, just patience my brother, and like someone said, talk to her about the effects of her new behavior

H2O2:

applesauce. people regurgitate those lines too naively.

love isn't enough. it requires action.

luvbooks:

From all you said, no. I don't think you are overreacting.
But for now I think the best option is to giver her some space. Whether she asks for it or not. Tell her you want a break. Make sure she understands that you KNOW there is a problem but until she is ready to discuss it with you , your hands are tied and you don't like scenarios in which the other party is keeping secrets.
Keep an open mind about all the secretiveness she is exhibiting. From what you've said, she's definitely hiding something, but as of now, you're still in the dark. So try not to assume the worst.

omomakun:

Bros you really need to sit and talk to her and let her know that her behavior is unacceptable if you guys are gonna get married. Maybe you should ask her what you've done or didn't do. Omo marriage is not an easy thing o! A broken engagement is better than a broken home ,

harakiri:

It's as if you were there when we talked yesterday concerning secrets.This is a girl that gets mad when i don't tell her things and here she is. . .keeping secrets. . .dirty ones at that.If i hadn't discovered for myself, she wouldn't have told me nada. I feel so used.I feel like a sucked orange peel in the dumpster!

switosman:

@ poster

Maybe yes you are over reacting or no, you are not.

the issue is  one kind.
ist, how long have this been going on?
can you pin point the beginning of all these?


the solution.

from my case, I am the hard lover type but very responsible cos I respect the marriage institution so much. so i give u some hard tactics,

1. Assure her that you want this marriage n if she does not want it she is free to say so ( give her a time period){my philosophy here is U CANT HAVE WHAT U R NOT READY TO LOSE}.

2. maybe you are an open book, she can read you so well, hence she can manipulate you well. reset yourself, have an element of surprise.

3. wear your " i dont care cap" this time bend toward " I dont care if u dont care too".

4. the big test: tell her U dont want to die now, her recent actions are not good for your health, she can go some place, she should give u a break to regain some freshness into your life. she may need time to try out her new found companions.

before all these make sure u have tried to make see sense. tell her people too, dont give details even when they ask.
tell her friends too. if she has a pastor tell him too. then lock up n apply the above rules.




NOTE. WHATEVER U DO AFTER A WHILE DO CALL HER ON PHONE, HER RESPONSE WILL TELL U IF SHE REALLY WANTS IT OR SHE IS JUST PULLING your LEGS.

davidylan:

your relationship is over. Get used to it. A woman who truly wants you will fight tooth and nail to keep you after 3 yrs. She's adjusted to you leaving her means that was what she wanted all along. She's probably heaving a sigh of relief and planning the new rendezvous while you're here weeping.

rickie4us:

you are not over reacting but check yourself too ,

switosman:

take this story it might show wisdom.

One elderly man had his wife of so many years appointed a local government caretaker committee one time like that. when this old bloke saw less of his wife he called some friend n relation to a party just to inform them to start looking for a young fine n well behaved girl for him to marry. that at his age now he need some care n he is not denying himself that.

u know what, when his wife start getting calls from all corner no body told her to do the right thing. she had to weigh her case n fine out her husband is more important to the LGA stuff. she resigned.

@davdylan
switosman na story u dey tell. This woman is practically tired of the relationship and wants out. Bros is holding on for something that no longer exists.

bros, its not bad to want something to bad, some can kill to have it. poster is in his right to want n until its proved the he cant, he cant do alot even toll some friends along male n F

switosman:

yes if she is important to you but if she is not then why are u here. go get another girl.

blueflame1:

Harakiri: If u r actually intending to marry this girl, you should be more worried about her gross disrespect to u and 'impossible' attitude of hers towards reasonable conversation.

Lets assume she is cheating on u; that could be dealt with, probably she would even deal with it herself after she gets married (not condonable, but analysed to show this is a situation that can be brought under control)

But for disrespect, bad attitude, contempt and lack of regards for u; you should be more worried about that if u r considering marrying her, it is almost impossible to change an adults attitude and her characteristics are such that could lead to a violent and unhappy future for u.

It is best u cut your losses and move on now rather than get into a doomed marriage whose end is likely to be worse than is reasonably predictable.
Unless u r intent on committing Harakiri (japanese for suicide)

Kilode?!:

@ harakiri

Read the post below carefully and act! it will solve your problem.

https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-396243.0.html