There is so much deception in this thing called relationship.

You guys should believe it when people say they are happier single.

Some people's happiness in relationship is like looking through colored glasses. The day they know the real person, they become dumbfounded.

MissJoy29:

God will Bless you my brother. Anyone who is obsessed with checking my phone and asking questions like a detective is already suspect number one. How do you know I'm trying to hide something in my phone if you are not hiding one or have hidden something there yourself?

Transperancy is key FOR BOTH PARTIES. And it's not just about giving you access to my phone. Besides, why would I want to develop high blood pressure early? Cos that's what I see as the effect of two timing and cheating. But let's assume I don't love my life and HBP is bae, I will cheat smart. I don't need to list ways of cheating smart here. But all those people up being particular about phone haven't seen really smart cheats.

Btw,I haven't seen where it's written that only ladies' phone should be checked. Or do those guys above me want to bring African man mentality to this too? My partner and I should be free with our phones.

Cc: chocbe rry,
cas syrooy,
pur ityval.

Lemme go through the thread first before giving my reply.

Modified:

I'm not against what the tweet says but I don't back it too. It's a two-way thing. If the need to check arises, please follow your intuition and check it up but when there's no need just don't bother, the exception to this is that you learn other personal things about your partner that they aren't ready to reveal to you yet.

I for one, I'm a one-man-one-woman type of guy and I don't unnecessarily get bothered about your activities except I begin to suspect you and the signs are no longer ignorable.

My phone has simple password, my partners name(pet names or any devised for such purpose). Feel it free to check, the worst you can see might be weird search histories.

I guess the reasons why some of these guys who posted earlier clamour for checks might be due to personal histories or their relationship with people who have been victims, they're trying to protect themselves by being unnecessarily alarmed and agitated.

I have personal experience where checking might have or have not saved my relationship, let it be, you won't die. It'll hurt but just know human's duplicity is too much and the moment I catch glimpse of that, I let you go, no room for being too alarmed without cause.
Anyone who wants to stay will stay and anyone who sees you as not good enough for them will leave, and that's life.

Gf/wives are not trophies but marriage to the right one will give the greatest satisfaction.

To Purityval, things have degenerated in the past couple of years but the little fraction of hope that someone who loves you exist, should still be able to convince you that despite the bad experiences about love, relationship and marriage, its worth trying again.

Idof:
I don't check people's phone. Either bf or family.

But something happened to me sometimes ago.

I was dating one idiot( not an insult, a fact). Just like I do at home, I can place my phone on the chair and get involved in my activities before I remember my phone, so I also leave my phone lying around at his place.
I couple of times, I came back to meet him with my phone, I was unperturbed.

One day, I stumbled on his social media page while googling about a certain business. Was I shocked.good
What I saw/ read was very damaging to me.

And now....

I still don't check phones but I also don't date again.

Advantage of checking phone is that saves you time and damage. You get out fast.
Disadvantage is that you become a paranoid person.

You shouldn't shut out your heart because of one bad experience.. Darkness makes us appreciate the light..

Checking ur partner's/spouse's phone has nothing to do with maturity.
U should both have unrestricted access to each other's phones.
However, u will most likely find something because these days, most boys/girls/men/women cheat.

Smart cheater will leave no traces for u to find but most definitely, KARMA will eventually catch up with them.

HOWEVER, if u want to track or find out hidden info about ur partner/spouse, contact SWU Surveillance on o.8.o.six.seven.9492.seven.zero.

cassyrooy:
Lemme go through the thread first before giving my reply.

Modified:

I'm not against what the tweet says but I don't back it too. It's a two-way thing. If the need to check arises, please follow your intuition and check it up but when there's no need just don't bother, the exception to this is that you learn other personal things about your partner that they aren't ready to reveal to you yet.

I for one, I'm a one-man-one-woman type of guy and I don't unnecessarily get bothered about your activities except I begin to suspect you and the signs are no longer ignorable.

My phone has simple password, my partners name(pet names or any devised for such purpose). Feel it free to check, the worst you can see might be weird search histories.

I guess the reasons why some of these guys who posted earlier clamour for checks might be due to personal histories or their relationship with people who have been victims, they're trying to protect themselves by being unnecessarily alarmed and agitated.

I have personal experience where checking might have or have not saved my relationship, let it be, you won't die. It'll hurt but just know human's duplicity is too much and the moment I catch glimpse of that, I let you go, no room for being too alarmed without cause.
Anyone who wants to stay will stay and anyone who sees you as not good enough for them will leave, and that's life.

Gf/wives are not trophies but marriage to the right one will give the greatest satisfaction.

To Purityval, things have degenerated in the past couple of years but the little fraction of hope that someone who loves you exist, should still be able to convince you that despite the bad experiences about love, relationship and marriage, its worth trying again.

Yeah, I'm not against what was tweeted too. I don't mind my phone being checked. It doesn't bother me cos I know you won't find anything in it. Transparency and openness are one of my areas of strength in relationship. Even my students have access to my phone like no man's business. How much more my love interest? But I will be overshady if I find out you are shady about your phone while you want to be checking mine. It doesn't work like that. I'm weary of people who make rules in relationship they can't keep.

I'm also a one-man lady. I'm not at all bothered by some details that normally bother people who are termed possesive. In fact, I could be with you for 2 years and more without checking your phone. Have done it before. I'm pro privacy but I'm open too. Except I'm suspecting you, I respect privacy a lot.
Yes, I agree that some good people have had ugly experiences in the past & therefore, gets sceptical when in a new relationship & want to prevent a reoccurrence, but trust me when I say that majority are abnormally concerned about monitoring their partners movement and calls and all cos they know what they do behind their partner's back & so want to prevent it being done to them. That's what makes me go crazy and all stubborn on some guys. I know the good ones who do it out of ugly experiences they have gone through. And I know the ones who monitor me cos they are probably doing worse. If you are in the latter category, the words you will use to describe me will be "difficult and stubborn". Cos I will make sure you don't succeed in your deceptive and insincere quest.

I became HIGHLY sceptical of "lifestyle monitors" after a particular relationship I had in the past. All because of constant monitoring. You wanna know why? Cos most times, they end up doing the worst! The experience I had was even worse than a roller coaster ride. Oh and my scepticism will always pan out as being truth. Also, after the said relationship, I discovered that no matter what you do, a man/woman who wants to stay will stay.

In all, I have not given up on love or despite the bad experiences. After all, some of these bad experiences, if not most or even all, make us better persons. I do tell people this, "if I love the wrong person right, why won't I love the right person even better?. Besides, it will even make me appreciate the right person more.
So, Purest @Purityval, don't lose hope yet. There are still good people around.

MissJoy29:

Yeah, I'm not against what was tweeted too. I don't mind my phone being checked. It doesn't bother me cos I know you won't find anything in it. Transparency and openness are one of my areas of strength in relationship. Even my students have access to my phone like no man's business. How much more my love interest? But I will be overshady if I find out you are shady about your phone while you want to be checking mine. It doesn't work like that. I'm weary of people who make rules in relationship they can't keep.

I'm also a one-man lady. I'm not at all bothered by some details that normally bother people who are termed possesive. In fact, I could be with you for 2 years and more without checking your phone. Have done it before. I'm pro privacy but I'm open too. Except I'm suspecting you, I respect privacy a lot.
Yes, I agree that some good people have had ugly experiences in the past & therefore, gets sceptical when in a new relationship & want to prevent a reoccurrence, but trust me when I say that majority are abnormally concerned about monitoring their partners movement and calls and all cos they know what they do behind their partner's back & so want to prevent it being done to them. That's what makes me go crazy and all stubborn on some guys. I know the good ones who do it out of ugly experiences they have gone through. And I know the ones who monitor me cos they are probably doing worse. If you are in the latter category, the words you will use to describe me will be "difficult and stubborn". Cos I will make sure you don't succeed in your deceptive and insincere quest.

I became HIGHLY sceptical of "lifestyle monitors" after a particular relationship I had in the past. All because of constant monitoring. You wanna know why? Cos most times, they end up doing the worst! The experience I had was even worse than a roller coaster ride. Oh and my scepticism will always pan out as being truth. Also, after the said relationship, I discovered that no matter what you do, a man/woman who wants to stay will stay.

In all, I have not given up on love or despite the bad experiences. After all, some of these bad experiences, if not most or even all, make us better persons. I do tell people this, "if I love the wrong person right, why won't I love the right person even better?. Besides, it will even make me appreciate the right person more.
So, Purest @Purityval, don't lose hope yet. There are still good people around.

Joycy.....

purityval:



Joycy.....

Purest....

Nice one guys, so some people hv been dragging me down here. Carry on there is God oo

LifeIsGuhd:
Has nothing to do with maturity...

I also believe we shouldn't go through our partner's phone but when that partner is making a conscious effort to keep his/her phone away... then my brother, it is time to throw away maturity and trust.

Hmmmm.. You have a point though

Maturity and trust till it'll end in tears

Na social media he post am

Na the sams social media we go see him hot tears Las Las

Lights up my kpoli in peace