I use to tell people that nobody is waiting for anybody. My dear, say the truth, you are not waiting for him. Just tell us you have not seen another man. It's difficult to find a husband this days o.

Acecards:
Two lovebirds : Joachinpedro and Wittyduchess. Started from disagreement now there are here

more like angry bird JOACHINpedro and lovely bird wittyduchess

Wittyduchess
Finally, I've known what happened!
I'm freaking exhausted.
Need to catch some sleep.
See ya

Acecards:
Two lovebirds : Joachinpedro and Wittyduchess. Started from disagreement now there are here

Lol

JOACHINpedro:
Wittyduchess
Finally, I've known what happened!
I'm freaking exhausted.
Need to catch some sleep.
See ya

Bathe with cold water and drink atleast half glass of chilled water too. All that blood boiling needs to cool down.

Zzor:
Sweetheart I'm on his side on this,its always wise for a lady never to date a man in her age group, a man must be stable financially before thinking marriage and he already made you understand that,the only mistake you made is dating him.Since he's not ready please look for someone who's ready and settle down with him,never let your emotions direct your thinking in marriage issues.Please let him go so as not to waste more time as you already have. Follow this tips:Cut off from a relationship that has no head way after six months to avoid stories that touch.As for me I already resolve never to date a man below 50yrs because most Nigerian men below 50 are still struggling.Such a messed up country

After 8 solid years. To some extent the bond could be so difficult to break oooo. Breaking away from him after 8 years might be a little bit difficult my sister!

PoliteActivist:


What exactly does the lady lose in undefined relationship?

1. Precious Time
2. Other potential Opportunities
As in the case of the OP!

abigail11:
I have been dating this guy for 8 years now. My relationship with him started since my university school days.

Ever since we graduated and started working, I have been expecting him to propose to me, which he didn't.

When I confronted him, he said he needs a tangible source of income first before he will marry me.

His current salary is 60k, yet he doesn't want us to go into marriage now.

I personal told him that we can manage what we have and plan our life together since I'm also working. But he said no, his reason is that he doesn't want us to suffer.

My problem is this:
1. Time is not on my side
2. He want to make millions before he can marry me, what if it takes more years to do that?
3. I'm ready and he is not ready.
Please I need advise. I don't know what to do.

Wisdom is profitable to direct, 8yrs in a stagnant rship. Like seriously are you normal?

JOACHINpedro:

Lol

This is the time to ask for her digits or send a PM to take this to the promise land, When is your marriage coming up ? I need una IV badly, enough wedding jollof rice. "Wittyduchess hooks Joachinpedro 2021"

Wittyduchess:
more like angry bird JOACHINpedro and lovely bird wittyduchess

Love is sweet oh... You people have forgotten about OP ... Very soon, it will be pursuing each other round a guava tree

EkelediliBuhari:
Marriage is not all life is about

Focus on building yourself first... have a personal vision and drive... if you find another person along the way you move on
If he happens to be ready then you marry

[s] But don’t marry him because he’s available and you’re “running out of time”.... who gave you time table?? [/s]

Focus on your personal life and all will fall in place

Easier said than done. You are not in her shoes, I wouldn't expect you to understand. If the guy is finally ready to marry three to four years to come but thinks she's too old for him, are you the one who will marry her or provide husband for her

Acecards:
Love is sweet oh... You people have forgotten about OP ... Very soon, it will be pursuing each other round a guava tree

Guy chill jor.

Wittyduchess:
Guy chill jor.

I'm a prophet oh ...

abigail11:
I have been dating this guy for 8 years now. My relationship with him started since my university school days.

You didn't mention the most important piece of information: how old are you?
Break free from the guy, don't mind the number of years you have wasted with him. Give attention to new suitors. How is he going to make millions by doing 60k a month job? I got married with far less amount but discovered that crappy monthly salary wasn't the way at all.

abigail11:
I have been dating this guy for 8 years now. My relationship with him started since my university school days.

Ever since we graduated and started working, I have been expecting him to propose to me, which he didn't.

When I confronted him, he said he needs a tangible source of income first before he will marry me.

His current salary is 60k, yet he doesn't want us to go into marriage now.

I personal told him that we can manage what we have and plan our life together since I'm also working. But he said no, his reason is that he doesn't want us to suffer.

My problem is this:
1. Time is not on my side
2. He want to make millions before he can marry me, what if it takes more years to do that?
3. I'm ready and he is not ready.
Please I need advise. I don't know what to do.

Thats if he doesn't escape to marry a younger lady later. Kai

Acecards:
I'm a prophet oh ...

nor be only prophet na seer.

abigail11:
I have been dating this guy for 8 years now. My relationship with him started since my university school days.

Ever since we graduated and started working, I have been expecting him to propose to me, which he didn't.

When I confronted him, he said he needs a tangible source of income first before he will marry me.

His current salary is 60k, yet he doesn't want us to go into marriage now.

I personal told him that we can manage what we have and plan our life together since I'm also working. But he said no, his reason is that he doesn't want us to suffer.

My problem is this:
1. Time is not on my side
2. He want to make millions before he can marry me, what if it takes more years to do that?
3. I'm ready and he is not ready.
Please I need advise. I don't know what to do.

Chai.. And na good person be this. At least it seems. Had to go through her posts. You shouldn't have dated that long, and come be from University naa.. Shaa such is life

authority2006:

Easier said than done. You are not in her shoes, I wouldn't expect you to understand. If the guy is finally ready to marry three to four years to come but thinks she's too old for him, are you the one who will marry her or provide husband for her

They'll be the first to call her evening newspaper! Not even minding her story or what led her to be unmarried in her 30s. Some men on nairaland are idiots.

Chummynoni:
The guy meant well for you. With the way the economy is, settling down in marriage is a task many men dread of entering. 60k monthly is jus 720k annually. Price of everything is rising everyday in this shithole. The guy loves you, but he wants a secured future for you and yur unborn kids

How will the guy be financially okay if continues with that work and salary? Poor mindset. The marriage is not the problem here because, even without marriage, he will still continue to struggle with that 60k a month as a bachelor.

Wittyduchess:
nor be only prophet na seer.

Come lemme marry you then. I earn more than 60j and I'm ready

abigail11:
I have been dating this guy for 8 years now. My relationship with him started since my university school days.

Ever since we graduated and started working, I have been expecting him to propose to me, which he didn't.

When I confronted him, he said he needs a tangible source of income first before he will marry me.

His current salary is 60k, yet he doesn't want us to go into marriage now.

I personal told him that we can manage what we have and plan our life together since I'm also working. But he said no, his reason is that he doesn't want us to suffer.

My problem is this:
1. Time is not on my side
2. He want to make millions before he can marry me, what if it takes more years to do that?
3. I'm ready and he is not ready.
Please I need advise. I don't know what to do.

No dey rush ooo, calm down. Don't let anybody pressure you but if you know you will put pressure on this guy, break and let him be. He's earning 60k give him more time

Carchoice:
What do you mean you are ready?

Will you foot the marriage expenses and pay bills after marriage?

Local man is trying to make life better first. I don’t blame him.

Extravagant marriage expenses is not compulsory. Paying bills after marriage, she said she was ready to contribute. If they couldn't grow individually after 8 years, it is time to try to see if can grow as one. They should try business or trade

EkelediliBuhari:
Marriage is not all life is about

Focus on building yourself first... have a personal vision and drive... if you find another person along the way you move on
If he happens to be ready then you marry

But don’t marry him because he’s available and you’re “running out of time”.... who gave you time table??

Focus on your personal life and all will fall in place

I agree with you 100%

authority2006:


How will the guy be financially okay if continues with that work and salary? Poor mindset. The marriage is not the problem here because, even without marriage, he will still continue to struggle with that 60k a month as a bachelor.

What is he meant to do?
I can learn from your advise as well

People like you are the ones that depends on men for everything. Stop confusing OP with your selfish idea, it's best you marry someone you can build an empire with than going for 50 year olds.

It's better you have mouth in your husband's house.

Thunder fire poverty!

It’s not easy but you have to move on

8 years. What where you guys doing for 8 years. He has definitely enjoyed every bit and doesnt see any reason to marry you. What will be so special about marriage again.

For your front he will marry somone eles.

What were you thinking . 8 years. Lets say School is 4 years. You came out again and gave another 4 years��� doing what exactly. I know you must have been rejecting others because of him. Nne if that guy no marry you ehe. Another relationship wont come with marriage like that oo it may be another two years again.

Abeg start looking for alternative. . If he is looking for a reason to dump you. If he finds one. He will leave you and marry another.
Play your game well

Wittyduchess:
Let me make this clear to you the op and the Ladies reading this ;


THE LONGER YOU DATE A GUY THE LESS LIKELY HE WILL MARRY YOU.


You see there are phases in a relationship, the important phase in a relationship is the *see finish phase* ,it is always advisable to go through this phase in marriage, this phase usually spans between the first five years of a marriage. But when the relationship prolongs it spans into the *see you finish* phase with no proper commitment.


Now I am sure he is not more than five years older than you, that even makes it worse for you my dear op. When he finally makes his millions the probability that he will want to settle down with a woman he has *see finish* and also close to his age group is very slim.

Leave or stay it's your choice, but just know one thing ,the chances that this guy will end up marrying you is 0.1% out of 100%.


If you do decide to stay, you can only force marriage out of him by getting pregnant for him. That is the only way as it stands. Goodluck with the *time waster* cos you are going to need alot of luck.

at this age and time, you still think that getting g pregnant for a guy will force him to marry you... lol...
The only thing that can make a guy commit to you after a long time is of he really loves you.
Every lady knows a guy that loves her .... when you are confused on whether or not he loves you, clarify things with him and move on.

Zzor:
Sweetheart I'm on his side on this,its always wise for a lady never to date a man in her age group, a man must be stable financially before thinking marriage and he already made you understand that,the only mistake you made is dating him.Since he's not ready please look for someone who's ready and settle down with him,never let your emotions direct your thinking in marriage issues.Please let him go so as not to waste more time as you already have. Follow this tips:Cut off from a relationship that has no head way after six months to avoid stories that touch.As for me I already resolve never to date a man below 50yrs because most Nigerian men below 50 are still struggling.Such a messed up country

People like you are the ones that depends on men for everything. Stop confusing OP with your selfish idea, it's best you marry someone you can build an empire with than going for 50 year olds.

It's better you have mouth in your husband's house.

Thunder fire poverty!

One of the things that make men marry late is the issue of elaborate wedding. You need close to a million naira to finance a wedding ceremony, whereas majority of men of marriageable age are earning below 30k monthly. Those whose parents are wealthy would depend on their parents to finance the wedding. on the other hand those parents aren't wealthy have no choice than to wait till they can save up some money to finance their own wedding. Some spend their life savings to finance their weddings.
To me elaborate wedding ceremony is mere waste of time and resources. If you can afford elaborate wedding go ahead, if you can't don't go into debt because you want to have a wedding.
ladies if you Know ur partner can't afford elaborate wedding, you people should do it low key and continue your life. After all elaborate wedding doesn't guarantee marital bliss
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You should appreciate the man for telling you his mind. Both of you should have a meaningful conversation(especially you) on where the relationship is going, let him tell you his plan and you too should tell him yours. if you are not ok by his decision break up with him in peace and look for someone that fit into your plan and marry him.

But don't make the mistake of forcing him into marriage by getting pregnant for him. You will regret that action.