ronkebp:

Dayo i do not want to compare and contrast was just sticking to the topic, i will never support a wife beating- up her mother-in-law, what kind of disrespect is that/ God forbid bad thing, will i like it if my hubby throws blow at my dad tufiakwa!!!!, let such a thing not happen IN JESUS NAME, AMEN. (that being said). I am not being one sided, what amount of strength can a woman have to go into physical comabat with a man, shebi all na real time shakara, that women will be flexing the muscles they don't have, the man will panelbeat the living hell out of her. All am saying is that the 'men', should know what women are made up of, and control their anger, i know many times that some men ignore their wives' rant and out of frustration the woman will go and beg her husband, but beating her and making a mess out of her infront of her children? will make the children look down on thier father even if they do not utter any word, but in their heart of hearts they are definitely not happy, even if their mum is at fault.

dayokanu:


Ileke idi.

1. How did a loving man and respectable husband become a monster like Akolade Arowolo

2. What if the husband beating the wife too is an act of self defence you know some women are evil.

3. What does a woman/man beating the other stand to gain

dayokanu:

TOH,,Are you saying there are more criminals than Law abiding citizens?

dayokanu:

TOH,,Are you saying there are more criminals than Law abiding citizens?

if not then we are discussing the minority criminals here

There are more men who DONT beat their wives than those who DO

9to5365 date=1316028021:


Everything you wrote is hearsay

coogar:

divorce is wrong in the eyes of some people. they consider it a sin!

coogar:

debate and argue with a woman throwing objects in every direction. . . .
how pleasant!!!

davidylan:

but beating her black and blue is ok? People sure read their bibles subjectively.
The bible says to love your wife as Christ loved the church . . . that is a very tall order that no man can honestly fulfill without the Lord's help. Christ died for His church, washed the feet of the disciples, reprimanded them in love when the need arose . . . i dont see where Christ advocate He will flog His church without mercy here or run a car over her foot.

dayokanu:

Why does a matured and responsible woman have to yell, spoil for a fight, Hold her husbands shirt, scatter the whole house before she can pass her points accross ?

What happened to being civilized

armyofone:

where do some of your guys find your own kind of gal from? Yaba left? how unpleasant!

yet it shouldn't warrant hitting/beating.

Ileke-IdI:

Anywayz, can you guys stop coming up with your unlikely fairy tales?
Give us a substantial evidence for your stories. . . . feather story to back up unreasonable excuses.

No one needs to make story for mass wife beating in Nigeria, we all know that's FACT. It should be addressd as equally as the husband beating. . . . but this is not the thread for it.

ThiefOfHearts:

In Nigeria especially? Yes

After all is there law in Nigeria?

armyofone:

where do some of your guys find your own kind of gal from? Yaba left? how unpleasant!

yet it shouldn't warrant hitting/beating.

dayokanu:

Whats the unlikely fairy tales? That there are some violent women who throw everything into a fight

Lagos Wife Beats Up My Husband Because He Is Irresponsible
https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-703955.0.html

Man Beater: 61 Yr Old Wife Beats Husband To Stupor

https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-443725.0.html

Wife Beats Husband To Death In Calabar
https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-115258.0.html

Fairy tales? Unlikely you say? maybe those stories above are fairy tales too

You grew up in Naija count your neighbours, uncles and family friends and tell how many beat their wives vs how many dont.

The same place women who are victim of abuse get their husbands from

coogar:

it's an issue of checks and balance.

coogar:

divorce is a cardinal sin. it doesn't stop there too. what about the children involved in the marriage.

coogar:

does the bible not also say anyone remarrying after divorce is a compulsive adulterer/adulteress? so which is more permissible? i think it depends on the individuals involved.

coogar:

personally, i cannot advise anyone to leave his/her marriage.
let the people going through their wahala make that decision.
all i know is so many people(out of social stigma) would rather see their marriage through than go through the divorce.

dayokanu:

Maybe we should ask the women who are victim of domestic abuse why they chose to marry the rabid dog?

Ask Akolades wife why she choose to marry him?

men beat women, Its the mans fault for being violent and lacking self control

Women beat men Its also the mans fault for marrying a rabid dog.

At what point in time or in what scenario does the woman take responsibility?

ronkebp:

@ Freesia, OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!     , eh!!!!!! (thinking) that your friend !!!!! i pity her life, it is a pity, i don't know her!!!! i would have ordered some people to carry her out of the house. Is she a fulltime house wife 

davidylan:

not really. Its more subjective . . . most men do not advocate divorce BECAUSE we get the better end of the deal all the time. We can beat our wives and expect no push back, cheat, stay out of the home as much as we want and still have a doormat to cook or food, take care of the kids, keep the house clean all the while maintaining our strict rules!
Of course why would a man want divorce?

1. Divorce is not a sin under 2 conditions in the bible - one partner is an unbeliever and chooses to leave of his/her own accord or under circumstances of adultery. A man who beats his wife is an unbeliever . . .

2. Beating your wife is a worse sin.

3. If truly a man cares about the children in that marriage then he makes sure to treat his wife the way he wants his in-laws to treat his daughters. If you love your kids then you dont make their mother constantly unhappy, afraid of living in her own home and constantly having to humiliatingly defend herself from prying questions from her own offspring.

So beating her like a goat is ok as long as she stays in the marriage? Is that how the Lord asked you to love your wife as yourself?

yeah, i guess that's why they prefer to die in silence. I have very little pity for them.

Sisi_Kill:

You are quite right, we should be asking the women why they married a rabid dog but we don't. . . you know why? Because men like Johndoe and cooger who believe it is a man's right to beat his wife exist.

armyofone:

lie, not true pant on fire it is the other way round. women have been keeping quiet about it since the beginning of time.

Sisi_Kill:

There is no justification for anyone to hit another person. . .Period.

However, we all know the percentage of wives beating their husbands is waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay lower than men beating their wives. . . for every 1 abused man, there are a thousand abused women. To deny that would be completely idiotic. . .I mean Johndoe type idiotic.

ronkebp:

read comments and shakes head!!!! oga ooooo!!! so Dayo, you support a man beating a woman for her misbehaviours

naijababe:

Hmmm, really?! Every issue that affects families that focuses on one side often turn into an us versus debate resulting in a big distraction from the key issue . I don't know where you got your statistics from and I really don't understand why we like to play ostrich sometimes(more than 40% of domestic violence victims are males), but just so you know, most abusers themselves grew up in an abusive environment regardless of who was victim/perpetrator.

In the late 90s, the UK government recognised and passed laws to address the underlying issue which meant that the victim doesn't have to call the police for the perpetrator to be apprehended (the neighbours or whoever can do it).

dayokanu:

[size=18pt]I support every human treating the next person with respect both male and female should respect one another and never resort to violence or verbal abuse.

Gender is no excuse for irresponsible behavior[/size]

naijababe:

Hmmm, really?! Every issue that affects families that focuses on one side often turn into an us versus debate resulting in a big distraction from the key issue . I don't know where you got your statistics from and I really don't understand why we like to play ostrich sometimes(more than 40% of domestic violence victims are males), but just so you know, most abusers themselves grew up in an abusive environment regardless of who was victim/perpetrator.

In the late 90s, the UK government recognised and passed laws to address the underlying issue which meant that the victim doesn't have to call the police for the perpetrator to be apprehended (the neighbours or whoever can do it).

neyostica:

Am nt a big fan of COOGAR n DAYOKANU cos of there comments on my belovd Arsenal, bt i cudnt agree more wit them. Women can kil u with d words 4rm their dirty mouth, i dnt tink a rational man wil just wakeup n start beating his wife,  

coogar:

no. . . .according to the females on here. . . .men don't suffer domestic abuse at all.
it's the odd exception - only 2% men suffer the abuse in contrast to 98% women.

coogar:

because you were raised from a broken home does not mean everyone would subject themselves to that kind of childhood.
i believe your parents also go to nigerian churches - so the dust yarning probably started from the cradle for you.

Sisi_Kill:

Lmao! You question my point because it lacks a source and turn around to make yours by citing unsourced stats? Gee whiz! How can I argue with that? I concede. . .you totally win this round.

stillwater:

Boring!!!
You can start your NGO on battered men. As far as we are concerned, it is time to crush the issue of wife battering in Nigeria. It's just a matter of time. I tell you.

ThiefOfHearts:

Look at this coon LOL

You can only wish you and your parents could have the longlasting marriage my parents have that has NEVER seen any type of violence whatsoever so abeg comot and stop arguing with women like a phaggot

As for Naija churches, we dont attend that garbage. Any other daft comment you'd like to make? Were alaso.

naijababe:

http://www.parity-uk.org/RSMDVConfPresentation-version3A.pdf
http://www.guardian.co.uk/society/2010/sep/05/men-victims-domestic-violence
http://www.tellinitlikeitis.net/2010/01/abused-men-battered-and-emotionally-abused-male-victims-of-domestic-violence.html

Until civil rights group, NGOs and individuals like you and I pressure our law makers to make it punishable by law, it will go on abated