BABE!:

"I am 28 and Nigerian. I stay in England. I have a child and she's 6 yrs old. I broke up with her father (my ex) 3 yrs ago.  My daughter and I are about to move in with my current partner, who is 32 and also Nigerian.

The problem is, "What should my daughter call my partner?""

MsDarkSkin:

her step father. His first name, a nickname or what ever.

If her biological father is in her life, there is NO need for another man
to have the title father or dad as far as she is concerned. PERIOD.

MsDarkSkin:

her step father. His first name, a nickname or what ever.

If her biological father is in her life, there is NO need for another man
to have the title father or dad as far as she is concerned. PERIOD.

Mrs, Chima:

Mr. Whatever his name is.   She is still a child therefore should address him as her elder.  

coogar:

before i answer this - what part of nigeria is this man from?
if he's from the south west, you are in trouble.

BABE!:

Yes, he's from the south-west. Why am I in trouble?

BABE!:

Hm. Thanks for your input.

The thing is, I'm Nigerian (Yoruba), and in my culture, it's sort of disrespectful of my daughter to address someone that old, by his "first name".

Isn't that a bit too formal? Remember we are gonna be living together.

Ijogz K:

Una no dey Crash Ni? , Like seriously, are U guyz dis dead?

Ijogz K:

Una no dey Crash Ni? , Like seriously, are U guyz dis dead?

coogar:

before i answer this - what part of nigeria is this man from?
if he's from the south west, you are in trouble.

Mrs, Chima:

I think calling him daddy or stepdaddy is too formal. Let say his last name is Koyoke, she can call him Mr. Koyoke as a sign of respect.

coogar:

if he's yoruba - your daugher cannot call him by name.

she can't even call him "uncle". i am yet to see where an uncle and a mum are sleeping in the same bed.

i can't think of any name that fits your partner. let her call him santa claus.

coogar:

if he's yoruba - your daugher cannot call him by name.



i can't think of any name that fits your partner. let her call him santa claus.

BABE!:

LOL. Pls be serious. Wetin be Santa claus?

Hm. The "uncle" thing sounds ok.

But, like you said uncle and mum on the same bed? Nah.

MsDarkSkin:

her step father. His first name, a nickname or what ever.

If her biological father is in her life, there is NO need for another man
to have the title father or dad as far as she is concerned. PERIOD.

lefulefu:

that is if the bobo get big belly with long white bear bear

coogar:

what do you want her to call him?

coogar:

is her biological dad in her life? if that's the case then she cannot call 2 different men "daddy"

Yes, he's still very much in her life.

Calling him by a nickname is still like calling him by his first name.  

coogar:

this question is ambiguous.  

MsDarkSkin:

Calling someone (an adult) by their first name is disrespectful virtually everywhere but my point is she shouldn't be calling him 'dad' esp. if her father is alive and in her life.

MsDarkSkin:

her step father. His first name, a nickname or what ever.

If her biological father is in her life, there is NO need for another man
to have the title father or dad as far as she is concerned. PERIOD.

Mrs, Chima:

Mr. Whatever his name is. She is still a child therefore should address him as her elder.

D-sense:


Lmao . . .Mr Ogunfe u mean?lol

OP.
I guess the child should be calling him "Uncle" . . .Since her dadd is still alive.

Tho calling him by his name sounds very disrespectful . . So "Uncle" sounds beter.

BABE!:

That's why I started the thread.

Yes, he's still very much in her life.

Calling him by a nickname is still like calling him by his first name.  

MsDarkSkin:

but you're Yoruba. . .it's an abomination to call him 'uncle'. . .remember?

D-sense:

Yoruba by name

coogar:

that makes it even more difficult.
how do you make her understand which "dad" is the "real dad".

coogar:

what kind of yoruba man is your partner?
born/bred in naija or the british-born?

this issue wouldn't have been a problem in lagos. every child has about 60 daddies.
the fathers of all your friends are your "daddies". some landlords even want them to be addressed as daddies.

D-sense:


OP.
I guess the child should be calling him "Uncle" . . .Since her dadd is still alive.
Tho calling him by his name sounds very disrespectful . . So "Uncle" sounds beter.

BABE!:

That's the thing. She's too young for all these "drama".

Hm. True. This issue wouldn't be a problem if we weren't Nigerian. Too much "respect" issues. It gets confusing

He's a correct Naija guy. Born and Bred in Naija.

Ivynwa:

@Babe

If you are not living with your man and your daughter wants to talk about him, won't she say Mr. Fred (For example Mr Fred asked me to tell you, so so and so) that is if fred is his name.
If her Daddy is not in her life and you and your man decided for him to fill in the father figure for her, that is when your man can be daddy for her as that  is not the case she will have to call him by his name. There is no disrespect to that even though in our culture we see that as disrespectful. If both of you  gets married, he becomes her step father, for now he is only her mummy's friend and can be called by his name.

BABE!:

That's the thing. She's too young for all these "drama".


Hm. True. This issue wouldn't be a problem if we weren't Nigerians. Too much "respect" issues. It gets confusing.

He's a correct Naija guy. Born and Bred in Naija.

He's not her uncle though. So why should she call him "Uncle"?