Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! - Family (5) - Nairaland
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My Elder Sister Is Feeling Suicidal / Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) / Are you feeling angry right now? Let-off steam here! (2) (3) (4)
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| Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! by tpia5: 10:45pm On Dec 19, 2011 |
I think in some instances (maybe not all), its important to try and identify stressors which may be fueling the depression. I'm no expert but that's my opinion. Also, a stressor isnt necessarily a person you dont like (or your enemy), but could also be habits or characters/attitudes you yourself have but dont realize its a stressor. I've noticed this is especially common with people who gossip a lot without having a corresponding balance of kindness which is supposed to be a key element of human nature. Dont know how else to put it but someone may get what i mean. Your gossip habits, or the company you keep, which enables these habits, may be stressors which can leave you feeling desolate and without anything to fall back on during difficult times, or when you are depressed. All hypothetical analyses of course. |
| Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! by tpia5: 10:48pm On Dec 19, 2011 |
Anyway, my point is identify your stressors if possible and dont rule out the fact that YOU may actually be your own stressor through your habits. |
| Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! by tpia5: 11:02pm On Dec 19, 2011 |
My post isnt meant for those who are genuinely passing through various struggles and trials which they have no control over, but its meant to address people who might not realise what they do might come back to haunt them someday. Dont kill that spirit of kindness which God placed in every human breast. Its not necessarily a weakness depending on context. |
| Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! by perx2: 3:02am On Dec 20, 2011 |
perx: at last the yeye thing don put d 2nd part |
| Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! by Ivynwa(f): 5:48am On Dec 20, 2011 |
Quote from: Tem01 on Yesterday at 11:30:37 AM maclatunji: @Tem01 I am referring to a statement Maclatunji made to you above because I also have that in mind to tell you. I think that by now the consoling words you've gotten so far have doused your heart with some modicum of comfort. You need to muster some strength and stand up for yourself, don't kill yourself because of others and what they may be saying to you. Be strong for yourself, killing yourself is allowing them to kill you. It is the same precious life they have that you have too so fight to stay alive and happy too. I have come across 2 inspiring women that had problems with birthing issues, refused to allow taunts get to them and instead are fighting for their lives------ exploring such alternatives like adoption, concentrating on their business and jobs and making great lives for themselves. We have heard stories of women that still got blessed with fruits of the womb after 8, 9, 10 years. If your spouse is supporting you and being there for you, we are encouraging you to be patient as you seek. Be it done to you according to the promises of God to us. Amen! |
| Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! by Nobody: 6:03am On Dec 20, 2011 |
suicide is the ultimate form of selfishness and cowardice. No two ways about it . . . the reason suicides are on the dangerous rise is because it has now been glamorised by our societies especially in the west. Nowadays high school students hang themselves because they were "bullied" (i.e. called fat) on FB!!!  Can you blame them? They kill themselves and the society hails them as "heroes" . . . |
| Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! by maclatunji: 6:26am On Dec 20, 2011 |
^Feel free to be yourself (LOL). Telling you otherwise would be waste of time- I hail! Just come and use this your persona to fight for political office in Nigeria so that some people can really get the Jennykadry effect. |
| Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! by maclatunji: 6:33am On Dec 20, 2011 |
@Ayinba1, I trust you can let it go. Thank you! |
| Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! by perx(f): 6:54am On Dec 20, 2011 |
Ujujoan: ceasyc: terrible is an understatement. well SUCH IS LIFE - DEFINITELY F^CKED UP IN MY CASE. i've cried my eyes out this morning when i heard someone i guess in d church singing d song that starts and ends with "saviour, saviour, saviour hear my humble cry. . . DO NOT PASS ME BY". this is blurry. i still dey cry self i'm still trying to get d bot thing off my case so that i can paste or post d concluding part. what do u mean its in my profile  thas BS, i want it on this thread!where dem mods@? |
| Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! by nweddings2: 8:24am On Dec 20, 2011 |
This is the concluding part to Perx's story (thats if I the bot doesnt remove it) in April 2009 I had a terrible attack in my left leg, I went to bed at 10 pm, my Left leg started to jerk badly at the hip from 10 pm to 4 am, I felt like my leg was about to be pulled out of my body. I was screaming and crying. The next day I observed a shortness of my left leg so I went for x-ray and it showed that I have a fracture and a dislocation in my hip! doctors say i have a problem with my nervous system and i have tight muscles, veins in my left leg and spasm but they are not sure what the cause is I am running out of options, wasting money and I don’t know what else to do. I would like to travel for the above reasons My right leg is starting to get affected too, I cannot walk and recently I think I have a phobia for falling. Doctors could not fix my hip in Nigeria , they said the spasms & muscle stiffness in my leg were too much that is why I have to go abroad . where d money My affected leg is now about 8 cm shorter than the right leg. Can the length of my leg be corrected? I take lyrical (very expensive for an unemployed person and weight gain is one of its side effect), prednisolone, piroxicam, metacarbamol, tramadol but they do not help much, physical therapist is hard to get here. i've been to churches, even synagogue and redeem. My family seems tired of taking care of me, I can’t really blame them because I have been sick and cannot walk for 4 years and I’m getting tired too. Using a wheelchair, crutches and Zimmer frame is hard now. I have been praying to die but death won’t come and I’m not brave enough to commit suicide even though I do think about it almost everyday. guess what? my right leg femur had a fracture in october (not as bad as d left leg) and since then i have been in bed. doctors here said stay in bed for 2 months. "it will heal or go abroad" and i say . . . I DON TIRE JOR |
| Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! by perx(f): 11:36am On Dec 20, 2011 |
@nweddings2 thanks for trying to repost my concluding part but i guess d bot took d post out too i just dont get it |
| Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! by maclatunji: 1:26pm On Dec 20, 2011 |
maclatunji: |
| Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! by blank(f): 2:30pm On Dec 20, 2011 |
@ perx, my brother in law had the same issue. He wanted to do the hip replacement surgery in Nigeria but when he was in the hospital, the guy that entered before him never woke up. He had to leave and go the UK for it. He has done it and it lenghtened the leg in the sense that the hip had kinda slanted so was straightened out now. He is walking with just a slight limp and praising God for His deliverance. He had to save for some number of years before he could afford it and when the pain became too unbearable. |
| Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! by ifyalways(f): 2:34pm On Dec 20, 2011 |
Great thread! 5 years ago,I was down,so down that yep I did think sucide .I lost my then guy a week to our marriage.I was just 18. . .It was a bad omen they said,i was an abiku.I foolishly thought life was not worth living anymore.stabbed myself a couple of times,took pills,tried drowning at the river(I can't swim even with a life jacket) etc,everyone one else gave up on me but my dear momma never did.she talked,cried with me,prayed for and with me,pushed me,challenged me. . . it took sometime but i DID finally got up,saw reasons to live and what can I say?God is good,life is good too. It was even at that trying period that I joined NLD.I found a section where i had fun(Culture section) and I immersed myself there.Today,God not only restored me but also blessed me with a wonderful man and lovely kids. To all those passing tru one problem or the other,hold on there even when it seems there's NO reason to do so,better days lies ahead. |
| Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! by Nobody: 2:50pm On Dec 20, 2011 |
Awwwwww ify. God was and still is your strength. Who knew why it happened? Maybe it wasn't meant to be. Enjoy your life nowww joooorrr, you enjoyed so tey nine months later you carry twins enter this world. Ole  |
| Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! by perx(f): 3:49pm On Dec 20, 2011 |
@maclatunji - no i didnt see that post b4, thanks for posting it again i have seen your contribution/post on the other thread too. i hope d mods or bot repost it the/my other threads https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria?topic=457497.msg9804153#msg9804153 https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria?topic=523754.msg6865774#msg6865774 https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria?topic=448126.msg6060843#msg6060843 https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria?topic=457497.msg6233580#msg6233580 blank: 9ija docs and hospital sef, damn. thanks for sharing. thank God for your bro in law. 4 years and still down, i wish i can have the same miracle or cure. i'm just too young for this sh^t. my youth is wasting away. sighssssssssssss |
| Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! by Nobody: 4:39pm On Dec 20, 2011 |
perx: Awwwwww sweetheart! It's well. Like I said earlier, I just dn't know what to say but I know this may be very difficult for you to believe but there are people who are in a worse condition. Not that it's any consolation. HAve you thought of the possibility of going abroad for tratment? Do you think you can afford it? I really really wish I can help you but I just don't know how. There's a thread for NL charity . . . maybe you could move your case there so people can see how they can help. |
| Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! by maclatunji: 8:01pm On Dec 20, 2011 |
@Perx, I just thought of something. I don't have money to help you but I think I can help you with exposure and I need you to help me with that. Here is the beginning of what I need from you: I need you to create a blog on http://www.blogger.com (I would have helped you with this but I have an incredible workload on me). When you set it up put your real name as the title of the blog. For example, there is Linda Ikeji and she has http://LindaIkeji..com . When you are done, you need to create posts in this your new blog: I want you to give a brief profile of yourself. Who you are, a little bit about your family, what schools you attended, what qualifications you have, what your life was before all of 'this' started. Now, tell us about the ailment: how it started, what steps you took and how you have been coping thus far. Tell us how you have been coping, what your daily routine is like as well as your support structure (I.e. those that have been supporting you). Thereafter, tell us your present state and what medical experts have said is required for you to live a relatively normal life under the circumstances. Now, you will tell us what you need from the general public in terms of support. This blog is not about you being a beggar (you are obviously not) and it is not a 'pity party'. However, you are in a difficult situation and need all the help you can get and we want to use this blog as a platform for you to get that help. Lest, I forget. You will need to put your photos on this blog- I mean photos of a young woman who is full of hope despite this predicament you have found yourself in and not photos of despair or pity. What we want to achieve is to document your situation on a single platform to get some of the help you need. Now, I know this is a lot of work for a healthy person and for you obviously an additional burden. If you can dictate your thoughts to someone who can write or type them for you- please do so. Once you have completed this let me know, I will take it from there. Of course, it would be nice to update your blog every day. In addition, I would like you to create a twitter account- once again with your real name. I don't need you to tweet much but keep it a little active. If you can manage to do these things I think we can get you a lot of positive exposure. I have a few ideas on how to achieve this but it should be my secret for now. Please help me to help you with this. Note: Don't use unnecessary abbreviations in your posts on the blog. Tell your story to the world and you may just get the required help. |
| Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! by God2man(m): 9:46pm On Dec 20, 2011 |
In my group in the church we have similar problem concerning a particular sister with the stigma of barreness. We keep on encouraging her, we told her to go for higher couselling, she did. The problem was still there. There is always a way out. We cleaved on the mercy of the living God. MERCY, MERCY, MERCY is a powerful word. God said" i will have mercy on whom i wil have mercy" it is a sovereign declaration. One is only entitle to it, if you can be merciful to other, the book of mathew says: he that show mercy will obtain mercy. Mercy is needed when we are guilty and the enemy is using it as a legal ground, for hindering our prayer, We should combine it with fasting and prayer and sow a battle seed into God's kingdom and let us see the movement of the hand of God. There are battles and there are battles, strange battle require strange prayer. Mysterious problem require mysterious prayer.At this jucture, i would like to recommend this book PRAYER RAIN by Dr. D.k Olukoya. It is panacea for all problems. I think you can get it at any MfM bookshop. God bless you. God2man. |
| Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! by perx(f): 9:58pm On Dec 20, 2011 |
Ujujoan: mods oh my 2nd and concluding story is still not here, na wa anyway thanks. . . abroad is what i have been thinking of for a while now but na money matter my family, extended family and friends are trying their best to raise the money but its taking forever while my condition is getting worse i am spending christmas and boxing day in bed cos of the other fracture i had in my right leg, though not as worse as my left leg but the docs here put p.o.p so that i cannot move it for two months. they are scared to operate in this leg too, no b only dem, in fact me i'm scared too he said stay in bed for 2 months, it will heal on its own or i'll refer u abroad. i'm like wtf! been in bed since october from walking to limping to 1 crutch to 2 crutches to wheelchair to bed. na wa gan. 4 years I DON TIRE. I DON TRYYYYYYYYYYYYi dont know anything about d charity on NL |
| Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! by perx(f): 10:15pm On Dec 20, 2011 |
maclatunji: REALLY? cool, i'll think about it and then get on with it (the blog). my real name, pix and all - gosh, my family is kinda popular in my city but who cares, i need d help they cannot give me. them don try sha but not as much as i expected. my family - *shakes head in pity* WELL ITS JUST AN EYE OPENER i have typed my experience and illness and sent it to various hospitals abroad since i started getting worse in 2009, so all i need do is just copy and paste. if i remember anything else, that wont be a problem cos it wont be much more than the above. i dont need individual help, i mean one person because it will cost much. if possible that is great but charity organisation would be better so they can see me for themselves before doing or giving anything. thanks and God bless |
| Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! by Ivynwa(f): 1:42am On Dec 21, 2011 |
perx: I feel your pain dearie. Severally have I logged in to say something that will douse your heart with comfort and severally has words failed me, I only hope that God gives you the strength you need through this. A good medical care is important for you and with the fighting spirit you seem to have, such is not impossible. Last night I was trying to design a blog too, when you start it and needs to share ideas you can send me a mail and we can help each other with the designing okay Baby. The blog thing is a great idea that may get us the help we need here. |
| Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! by kelz88(f): 1:53am On Dec 21, 2011 |
I believe everything happens for a reason, and you were not brought into this world to go just like that. That being said, no matter how crap life is don't resort to suicide. It's very selfish! Think of all the people you will be leaving behind. Things will get better. xx |
| Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! by Ivynwa(f): 2:36am On Dec 21, 2011 |
maclatunji: Thanks for your words, do know that I'm not part of those girlish bickerings. I didn't do that in my school days and growing up as a young girl and can't be fiddling with that now. All I pointed out in the thread is that it is important that the site and the forum members help discourage mockeries and tauntings that is going on here so that people can be more free to share their problems. I wasn't speaking in vain, even Seun the owner of the site once admitted in one of his interviews which I read that one of the problems he encounters here is the insensitivities some people display sometimes. Know that I am not and refuse to be part of all the hullabaloos that followed suit after that my post. The false accusations I am been labelled with here is all for daring to tell a nairalander that it is not good and that a mother like her should not be ----mocking a distressed woman who dared share her marriage problems here that she is "begging her husband for intimacy" ----mocking a young woman that is seeking advice on the limitations of helping her troubled fiance financially and insensitively telling her that the reason she is helping him is because she is desperate. ----mocking and sneering at the business(means of sustenance) of a pregnant woman that swallowed her pride to ask for help with Baby cot If that makes me a bad person as I am being made out, it's all good. The term "Mama Mmadu meaning mother" which I used when I talked to her was later translated maliciously by her and her clique that I insulted their children and family but I understand that they needed some justification for themselves when others in the thread frowned on her insulting her fellow woman for not being married. No way am I letting anybody make me feel bad about myself dearie. I am happy for us all for our blessings. It gladdens me to see others gets blessed just like it saddens me to see people that are already hurting made fun of. I have no apology for speaking up against that. No, I don't. I have no time for these and don't bother reading all the stuffs being said against me here but this is for anybody that may have read them and believed whatever they have in there. I agree that we all have different views to problems and that all these views cannot all sound friendly in the ears of the persons seeking comfort but do we have to mock and abuse them while giving our contrary view and anybody that frowns on that gets mocked & abused too. |
| Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! by perx(f): 4:03am On Dec 21, 2011 |
Ivynwa: thank u. . . yay at last the mod/bot put up d 2nd and concluding part. was frustrated/anxious/upset 4 a while which i do not need in my condition due to my symptoms. link below https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria?topic=826801.msg9796234#msg9796234 |
| Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! by ayinba1(f): 5:11am On Dec 21, 2011 |
maclatunji: Absolutely! Anytime! author=jennykadry link=topic=826801.msg9801000#msg9801000 date=1324358043] Apologies, I meant it for the lady, Ivynwa. Post is modified, accordingly. |
| Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! by ifyalways(f): 10:19am On Dec 21, 2011 |
@Jenny,thanks. Sitting back NOW, I can't even believe that a couple of years ago I thought sucide, tufia!!! I pray God gives all the low, down and depressed souls the strenght to get up again, a reason to live and grace to withstand the tempest. |
| Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! by Nobody: 2:29pm On Dec 21, 2011 |
ifyalways: God save you say you no succeed!  So you wanted to deprive my daughter (future) of the husband I've booked for her eh? As if you don't know how hard it is to get a good husband dese days. Mtccccchew!  It's well my dear! Like Jenny said, everything happens for a reason . . . . I'm sure everyday you find reasons to thank God that you are married to your hubby. Imagine what you would have missed! |
| Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! by ronkebp(f): 4:08pm On Dec 21, 2011 |
@ Temi01, Jenny has said what had to be said, you have to be strong and have faith that God would give you your own children, let those that have their mouths let them continue to run it, na them sabi, your faith and hope are in God, as long as your hubby is not victimizing you, you don't have any thing to worry about, how far are your knees from the ground ? Pray, pray and pray!!! i know God answers prayers, would it be at the times we expect sometimes, No!!! but when the right time is here, HE will answer your prayers. Children come from God. Never! think about committing suicide, it never solves any problem, instead it compounds it, you think you are going through tough times on earth? the dead and gone cannot just come back and give the living feedback on what is happening over there!!!! Let your faith move your mountain.@Perx, hmmmmmmmmmmm am really short of words, things happen with no one having answers to them, it is part of being human, but i know, there would be solution and answers with God, i call God everytime, because He is the ONLY medicine i know to all my problems. |
| Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! by perx(f): 3:13am On Dec 22, 2011 |
ronkebp: I hear u. thanks |
| Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! by Nobody: 12:04pm On Dec 23, 2011 |
I really do'nt know what to say  Reading all these posts has actually opened my eyes to how ungrateful i've been towards God! Atimes the little things we take for granted, I can't explain/understand how a sound person would wake up one morning all of a sudden one leg is growing shorter, The Lord that raised Lazrus from the dead I know you are still alive!! Please prove your healing powers on the life/condition of our sister''Perx'' whatever the situation is Lord, heal her permanently that her joy maybe full IJN.And for all those suffereing from one form of ailment/situation , i beg you Lord to also prove yourself faithfull in their lives, this is my Xmas wish Lord! For those of us who have been taking your loving kindness for granted, father we plead for your forgiveness and MERCY!! All these i ask IJN, LIFE IS BEAUTIFUL !! Merry Xmas and prosperous new year to ALL, |
| Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! by tpia5: 12:08pm On Dec 23, 2011 |
Its only by His mercies. . . . . . . . . . . |
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