Sissy, this is no xrated talk o. In fact we are in the middle of a sermon! It's all part and parcel of marriage and we are talking about marriage. The talk is even greatly toned down

I knew I was courting some trouble with that statement. Let God be true and all men liars. I believe there is nothing unholy in marriage between husband and wife. Adam and Eve had nothing to be ashamed of. They were free to experiment with each other and find out whatever pleases and pleasures both. A wife's body belongs to her husband and vice-versa. There is nothing wrong if I touch my wife's ears and I don't think it becomes a sin if I decide to touch her any other place. One of the reasons why we marry is to avoid immorality. So if the couple is comfortable with that then so be it.

However, there are certain other principles that should guide us in dealing with each other. We are supposed to look for each others' pleasure not pain. It means whatever causes the other pain or the other is not comfortable with or is dehumanising or unhygenic should be discarded. Since we are talking of love between both, then love it should be- it is patient, not selfish, doesn't seek its own, is kind etc 1 Corinthians 13).

Also, 'do unto others what you want them do unto you' is apt here. No one wants to be brutalised. So any act of brutality during the process is not love. There are many things spouses could do to and with each other without crossing the border into brutality and bondage. We make use of our imagination. The scripture says, whatever is pure, honest, lovely, right, and of good report, we should think of them; marriage and its components inclusive.

Having said these, I know a lot of people have some inhibitions, probably due to upbringing, trauma, or lack of understanding and not necessarily because sex is a sin or evil. Such issues should be brought out and discussed openly and freely between the couple so that it could be overcome. Then they can truly enjoy God's gift to man without shame or fear!

So where is Jennykadry when you need her?

Spouses are meant to meet the needs of each other.  Not only should they be willing patners, they should be willing explorers in the journey of discovery (according to Debosky!) that marriage is.  It's a lifetime of exploration where one should keep discovering things.

The Holy God created sex to be enjoyed in the right context (of marriage).  Like CC will say, there is nothing unholy between spouses in the bedroom.  Adam saw Eve and couldn't keep his excitement, they were both n[size=1pt].[/size]aked and were not ashamed.  The woman in that your sermon is not only unspiritual and immature, she is actually commiting sin by denying the husband!!  If she has to 'go to the mountain' the husband has to grant her the permission in that regard, else she is defrauding him.

chaircover:

Infact my lingerie order just arrived yesterday and I am counting down to our dirty weekend away on Friday. I found this site on google and I am definitely going to practice some of the styles 

I heard that there is no marriage in Heaven so I am going to make sure that I get my moneys worth from this guy 

Abeg softly on Mr Chaircover o!  Just make sure you reserve some strength for him to resume work on Monday o.

You actually heard correctly.  Angels must be jealous of us human beings in that regard. 

@Serubawon please preach to the congregation methods on how to keep the bedroom temperature sizzling. It will be nice to hear it from a mans point of view

Where is Serubawon when you need him most?  I don't want to crash into your sermon o.  Please come so that we can pray at the end of the service and share grace lol!!!!

chaircover:

ewo tun ni reverse cowgirl . . . I better google that one quick

CC you cracked me up on that! Debosky please come and explain quick!



@Debosky, that, ironically, is one of the thrills of marriage! Believe me. The very fact that you both are novices and inexperienced fires up the passion in you both. Whatever I knew, it all started with my wife and vice-versa. Nothing to compare with, no pre-knowledge of how it should be, except the theories learnt in books. We grew at our own pace and learnt what works for us all by ourselves.

The bedroom then becomes a laboratory of experiments- when we try a new trick and it seems obvious it is meant for gymnasts, we simply have the laughter of our lives and call it a day! Afterall, she is not running away. We have had to modify styles and positions to suite us, even in pregnancy! If she doesn't like one, then fabricate another, abi?

It is a good feeling to be able to have a mind-blowing satisfaction and still be able to pray right in the midst of it all. That is what a christian marriage is. I wonder why it is such a hushed up topic even in our churches!

Serubawon, Spoilt, Kiki2000 and all, thanks for your kind words.  You guys have been awesome here. God bless y'all.

@Serubawon

I am glad my post was helpful.  I couldn't hold myself back from writing that, considering your story.  I can understand where you are coming from when you said:

However, in a world where good marriages are becoming extinct, it's hard not to desire something good, when it's so hard to find.

Let me tell you, it is good to desire good things.  Remember "If you then, being evil, know how to give good things to your children, we have a Father in heaven who knows how to give good things unto them that ask Him".  So you are on the right track.  However, for you to receive something, you have to open up your hands, let go of whatever and receive.  You can't be holding unto what was and what should have been and still expect to receive what is ahead.  The past is gone.  The future awaits you.  Don't let the past rob you of the joy of the future.    You asked of a switch that turns everything off?  Let me show you one:

". . . but one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and reaching forward to what lies ahead,  I press on toward the goal . . .@ (Phillipians 3 13-14)

Observe my emphasis: a) Forget b) Reach forward c) Press on  d) The goal.  You have to make a deliberate effort to forget the past.  Thank God yours is a sweet memory.  Let that gladden your heart about what a wonderful marriage you had, but don't hold onto it.  Don't dwell on it again.  Then look ahead.  Reach forward.  And press on.  Take action.  Pressing involves exerting effort. Then focus on the goal, your goal, your children's goal, what you want for them etc.  I believe your goal is a happy marriage once again, a great upbringing for the kids, where they have the love of both their dad and mum?  Then press towards that goal.  Can Serubawon do this one thing too like Paul?

I could connect with you when you said things like these never heal completely.  Maybe I should modify that a bit by saying they do, but the scars will always be there.  When you heal of the broken heart, you carry the scars but the pain will be gone.  That is why even though you still remember, but the pain won't be there again.  When you hit that point, then you know you have truly healed.

I am glad you are better now.  I could read from your initial posts and the latter ones that you are better now.  It's not easy losing a loved one.  I have not lost a wife but I have lost a dad right in my very eyes and a younger brother so dear to me.  So I can understand a bit of the agony and trauma.  I carried them for years.  That was why I said certain things are better understood when experienced.

The Lord knows why certain things happen in our lives.  He is more than able to give you someone much better that you would wish it had happened earlier.  Trust me. You mentioned Bimbo Odukoya in one of your posts.  Thank God for you.  Remember what that woman was to her husband and many.  Such a graceful woman, to have gone just like that.  Now draw from her husband's experience.  He has since remarried and moved on.  Think about it and may God grant you favour.

Now let me venture a reason why such things happen in our lives.  I speak to you as a Christian.  Consider Jesus our perfect example.  He had to endure the things we endure as humans, go through the same temptations and trials just like us.  Why?  So that He can understand what we go though.

Hebrews 2
17  Therefore, he had to become like his brothers and sisters so that he could be merciful. He became like them so that he could serve as a faithful chief priest in God's presence and make peace with God for their sins.

18 Because Jesus experienced temptation when he suffered, he is able to help others when they are tempted.

One outcome of our trials is that we are able to help people experiencing same things we have gone through.  We can connect with them.  We can offer succour to them that none other could.  We can reach down and touch them where no other can.  And what happens after?  We lift them up.  They get back their lives.  They are changed.  They become better persons for God and mankind.  May that be your story.

So, in the grand scheme of things, it all makes sense.  It may not make sense at the moment.  But He surely has a way of making things work together for our good.  And he will for you.  Amen.  Perhaps, He is preparing you for a task ahead that you don't know yet.

Cheers.

Serubawon, I stumbled across this thread recently and I went through the posts.  All I can say is wow!  There are levels and depths one may never know except you experience them.  I marvel at your courage, resilience, tenacity, love, commitment, loyalty, maturity and sense of responsibility, both to your late wife and your kids!  You surely have a good spirit.

You have done well to have vented your feelings and burdens here and I can see you have been the better for it as well over the years.  I am sure your kids are already proud of you as a great dad.  Please keep it up.  You have said well that you owe them and the memory of their late mum just that.

I can see you are in a great company here, with all the mature responses from the crew    It's been encouraging reading through the posts and moreso knowing it's a life story.  Such experiences are the stuff great novels and movies are made of.  I am not flaterring you, but simply saying the truth.  It has all the works; the thrills and the frills    Others have said as much- please take the advice and work at it.  You don't really have to get it organised at first.  Just put it down- afterall it's your experience.

I was not really surprised when you mentioned you were invited to give a talk in a singles' meeting.  You may not realise the impact real life experiences may have until you share it with people!  There is no greater testimony and encouragement to someone passing through than to say "Hey, I have been there before. . . and this is how I pulled through, ".  You give only what you have.  And I am sure you have a lot to give.

Having said all these, please permit me to say something more.  Reading through your experience and perceiving from the unsaid, I have to say you have been a little bit hard on yourself on 4 fronts:

1.  It's good to dote on your kids.  That's a good sign of the great father you are.  But consider it on the flip side and look at the bigger picture.  You don't bring friends home, you don't smile often, you keep to yourself etc.  Have you thought deeply on the silent effects these may be having on the same kids you love so much?  This is 7 years after they have lost their mum and they could count the no of times their dad had smiled!!!  I am sure you don't want their psyche to be affected nor grow up having wrong impression and view of life.  You owe them also to show them how to have a balanced life and move on after disappointments of life.  Right now you are a bit skewed in that regard, especially with your kids easing into their teens.

2.  You seem not to have really let go of your late wife.  You had a great relationship with her.  Thank God.  I know what it means to have a great marriage, especially if you marry your best friend.  I also know what it means to look at the rock for hours together and seeing so much where others find it so boring!  My wife and I spent hours over the weekend just watching her try new clothes and getting into different postures and changing shoes, just the two of us in the bedroom.  Oh that is so boring to some people, but that is so bonding for us!  Serubawon, please take a great counsel from me- let go!  She is gone.  Move forward.  Yes you have tried, but you can do better. I will give you two examples (since you are a believer):

I am sure you remember Moses and Joshua had a great relationship.  Moses was a charismatic and caring leader and mentor.  So overwhelmed was Joshua that he couldn't surmon the courage to carry on after the death of Moses.  It took God to remind him "Moses my servant is dead; now therefore arise. . ." (Joshua 1).  He has to move on.

Also, when Samuel kept mourning after Saul's rejection as king, God had to speak to Samuel "How long will you continue to mourn for Saul. . ." (1 Samuel 16).  Quit mourning.  You may not admit it, but that is what you are still doing.  If you keep mourning for "Saul" it will hinder your progress.  It will keep you confined to the past instead of instead of looking forward.

That leads me to the 3rd front.

3.  You seem to be projecting your wonderful late wife to others and they are not meeting up to that standard.  It's like you want another Mrs Serubawon and you kept seeing others through her eyes.  Please know that people are different and the circumstances are not the same.  Instead of praying for another person like your late wife, you should pray for the right person for you considering the circumstances.  Please don't get me wrong: desire the best.  Don't lower the standards.  He will give you the desires of your heart, according to His will.  However, you have to admit that people are different and it will be wrong for the new spouse to be evaluated on the basis of another instead of on her own merit.

Perhaps this is why it is taking you so long to find love again.  I won't advise you to be pressurised into marrying, but I must say 7 years is long enough, considering you have kids that need mother-figure in their lives.

4.  Finally you are being hard on yourself, a human being with blood running in his veins!  Not only the kids, but even you also have needs to be met.  It is not good for the man to be alone.  You have emotions.  You must be lonely.  You sure need to enjoy the best in life and one of the best things in life is being in love and enjoying relationship again.  You owe this to the memory of your wife.  I am sure she wouldn't want her beloved to stay long without a worthy partner.

I know you are deep and you will understand my perspective.

I wish you the best life can offer.

Cheers.


[BTW I sent you a mail on the yahoo address you posted and didn't get a reply from you.  I wanted us to chat on a different level that may be a bit personal and deeper than what we can put here for obvious reasons.  Let me know if you feel obliged.]

Tgirl4real:

@ analytical, I see your point. It's sometimes tiring though. Esp wen the other party doesn't understand when you do the same.

Tgirl4real, I am not implying spouses should carry on their annoying habits at the expense of the other.  That won't be fair on the spouse at the receiving end.  I am only advocating for understanding and tolerance between spouses, especially since we all have our flaws as humans.

Jenny and CC, you gals are just lovingly crazy 

As for me, there is no dull moment with me when I am with my one and only! I simply become another man!!!!!! Spouses should learn to spend time with each other if you want to rekindle the fire. You will be amazed of the wondrous inferno that can erupt from that ember that is fading once you get rid of those things that steal your time with each other. Open yourselves up. Don't take things too seriously. Just be friends once more. You know how it was when you were courting. You were just happy being in each other's company. That spouse is still the same person, still capable of that romance.

To be continued. . .

CC, for most men, I can truly say we don't deliberately do those stuff.  I guess that is why we are human afterall.  Our spouses are suitable helps.  Come to think of it, who would have organised our homes and keep them well if not our wives?  Instead of seeing those trivial things as big issues, spouses should see them as opportunities to help organise the other.

No one is perfect.  Every spouse should create a space in their hearts to accommodate each other's flaws.  That room should be there, full of deposits of love and mercy.  Each time those flaws appear, just dip into  that space and draw some more love and mercy for your partner.  If he were perfect, he wouldn't need you.  In fact, you wouldn't have married him!

I don't know how many can marry a perfect partner!  You come into the house, it's so perfectly clean.  Nothing to mop, nothing to sweep.  Kitchen sparkles, rooms so tidy you wouldn't know someone lives in there, beds ever laid, no dangling cables, no running water, no misplaced books, everything in its place and all the time.  Nothing to discuss about because all points are clearly understood, nothing to get angry about because it's all smiles 24/7, no questions asked because there are no answers required, and on and on.  Think about it, that will be a boring place!!

That sounds so automated and mechanised, robotic that is!  Angel-perfect.  In fact, the only perfect beings are angels.  So perfect they don't and can't, live here on earth!  They will be so useless here.  No wonder they can't even marry!     What a priviledge we have as humans!

Maybe you may have to open a supermarket on your staircase soon! The truth is Mr CC may not even be conscious he does that or how regularly he does it. I give you one advice- lock them up when you pick after him next time and demand he starts paying for every time he demands for the items as 'lost but found'! I mean it. He will get the message. No nagging, no fuss, and on top of it, you get paid!!!!!

CAUTION: Make sure he is not hungry when you do that oooo!

chaircover:

I know that he doesnt deliberaly want to hurt me by placing these things on the staircase and its just habit for him. What advice do you have for me 

Like I mentioned above, I wasn't even aware I was doing that until my wife mentioned it.  Then I observed myself and I was shocked.  Sometimes I could count up to 10!  Did I set out to deliberately hurt madam?  Of course not.  But surely I was!  Advice?  Don't bring it up when angry or say it in an anger.  Remember, he is the one guy you are crazy about.  In fact turn it into a joke.  Madam used to tease me of how we would soon open a supermarket selling toothpicks in our bedroom!!  Other times, she will poke me with those toothpicks.  Of course, when that happens I know the next thing to do.

BRB

Lovely thread here. CC, you sure have a way of bringing these things up.

I don't know why we men generally can be unkempt most times, especially with the little things! I guess that is why we need our wives! Adam must have been one miserable fella in the garden all alone, with no one to pick after him! No wonder God pitied him and exclaimed "It is not good for the man to be alone". Let's think about it- It didn't start now. Like someone said, those are the little things that makes us miss each other.

After all said that, I know how irritating it could get, for the receiving partner. I had a nasty habit of putting my toothpicks (after meals) right on the part of the bed frame where we put devotionals, bible etc! Needless to say I wasn't even aware I was doing that (so please be easy on the men- they may not even be aware of the cause of the nag!) until my wife brought it up. Apparently she has been picking them everyday. I was somehow shocked I was doing that. So I made it a point of duty to remind myself to drop the tootpicks in the trash can. It has to be a deliberate effort. Has it totally stopped? I doubt, but it has greatly reduced.

Such trivial things can cause irritation. If not handled on time, it could add up and resentment could set in.

@ Topic,

I will add one or two cents here.

I addition to all said, there is a solution I refer to as 'Taking the fire out'.  I want to believe beyond the nagging and all the drama is a real issue taking the partner to the edge.  Find out what the issue is and correct it or at least initiate the actions to correct it.  They say there is no smoke without fire!  Take the fire out and the smoke dies a natural death!

I don't want to think someone just wakes up to fabricate new ways of nagging endlessly!  Something, somewhere must be irritating to the spouse.  Perhaps, she has complained about it once and nothing was done.  Maybe she can bear it for a while until it seems you are not listening to her.  Then the smoke goes higher.

Something every spouse should learn to do is to look for the best in each other.  Naturally, I don't want to be reminded of something I am already aware of.  So the onus is on me to take action about the complaint and get it out of the way, so my wife wouldn't find anything to nag about.

BRB

Madam Chaircover! I am honoured by your comments

I have been around. I usually read most of your responses. Only time denies me to respond to issues most of the time. I actually deliberately removed your name from my last response. You are definitely one of my favourites too. Most times you say what I would have said and more, so no need to actually say anything more. You make me feel I have another sister from a different mum! Lol!! Just know you are doing a great job here and many read your very apt posts silently.

Maybe I need to throw in some more posts to issues, if at least to provide a male angle to them sometimes. I will try.

You are certainly blessed. Love to Mr Chaircover!

I thought I posted this yesterday, but found out it didn't upload.

---

Hi Poster.  Please read through horny4u's and others posts.  Therein lie your solution.

Let me add my 2 cents.

I won't dwell on your 'old fashion way' of getting married.  It is done.  You are married.  It's good you love your wife and are eager to see things improve.  However, going through your posts gives me the impression of a nagging and whining husband who is desperate to convert his wife to be like himself.  Agreed, your wife definitely has issues (who doesn't?) but what I see here is someone who is not sure of herself and has complex.  This may have been partly because of the way you have nagged her into her own shell.

You talk as if she doesn't have a brain at all, calling her a 13 yr old etc!  Think for a moment- what do you think will be the reaction of your wife if she sees all you have typed and thought of her here?  Introverts (nothing wrong with being one!) have their ways of reacting to such verbal and mental torture- they withdraw further.  A choleric woman would have reacted aggressively and turned all hell loose for you at home!

Like someone said, you are just getting to really know each other. Instead of highlighting all what she is not, why not concentrate on her positives?  Instead of telling her all the time she needs to upgrade and improve, why don't you improve her?  Do it!  Work on her self esteem.  Praise does wonders.  Find her positives and start commending her for them.  You said she is beautiful, let's start from there!  Extol her beauty to high heavens.  Make it a point of duty to do it even publicly before others.  She doesn't go out right?  But I am sure you go to church together?  Then introduce her to people like "Meet the beauty of my life,  or "Meet my beautiful jewel, " etc.  I have seen such praise do wonders.

Whatever she doesn't know, teach her lovingly and come down from your high horse of intellectual superiority.  She might just be reacting to your "I am better than you/know more than you" attitude.  Assist her and let her know you are not competing.  Never look down on her.  Never talk down on her, whether in your words or actions.

Perhaps, she is finding life outside of Nigeria not too ideal for her and is slow in coping with it?  And the only way she knows to express it is by withdrawing.  Be her friend at this point of her going through the change and not her critic!  How educated is she?  Is she doing what she enjoys?

Sure she needs to improve sexually.  But instead of telling her how she is a nun etc, you take the lead and take her to that cloud 9.  You don't even need to ask her if she likes it a certain way.  Just do it.  Take it gently and slowly build her up to that point of no return where she will let go of every inhibition and explode!  A lot depends on you about this.  Don't be a lousy selfish lover in bed.  Work her up and see her change.  Set the mood early in the day, then build up the tempo in bed.  By the time the hormones start to flow, I can tell you she won't resist whatever you do to pleasure her at that point.

I am sure things can improve.  Work at it.

Cheers.

Uju, I wouldn't say she was wrong for not going that night- she had her reasons. Yes, I agree she definitely should have made it up first thing the following morning. On that, she was definitely wrong. That is why I said there are issues unsaid.

What I am trying to point out is the attitude of the poster towards his wife and it's obvious he is over-reacting on the issue. Let me ask- so who slept with mama that night? Is mama still alive after that? That he is still simmering with anger after the incident is just not worth the trouble.

@Uju,  no one is justifying the wife's action.  It's plainly insensitive.  I think it just didn't start with this episode; there must have been some issues.  However, I wouldn't just dismiss her excuse 'as nothing' according to the poster.  Depending on which area she stays and the kind of rain (read flood!) we have witnessed recently, I doubt if I will want to venture out even in a SUV, moreso when the mum was not sick!  The emergency was not on part of the mum, but of the househelp that travelled.  The mum, though old, is as fit as fiddle, just that 'they don't allow her to sleep alone'!!!

@Poster, please improve on communication with your wife.  In marriage you will discover it's not wise to just dismiss your spouse's concern as nothing, however irrational it might seem to you.  Most times, women react to how we say a thing rather than what we say.  Take note.  Check these two statements below and tell me what reaction both will generate:

1.  "Uju, you have to go right now to Ijebu to go and spend the night with my mum because I don't want her to sleep alone.  Alira, the maid is not around.  Go immediately . . . and I don't want to hear any excuse . . "

2.  "Uju darling, how are you?  I have missed you greatly.  I wish I could be with you right now.  I hope there is no problem? . . .  Please can you do me a favour?  I was just told there is an emergency at Ijebu and mama is alone and needs an urgent attention tonight.  Darling please help me find out what the problem is and I trust you can handle it.  I will call tomorrow morning for an update.  I just hope all is well.  Love you . . mmuaah"

@Poster,  I don't excuse your wife's 'misbehaviour' towards your aged mum.  It's insensitive of her.

However, you need to change your 'misbehaviour' towards your wife!  From the title of your post to everyone of your posts, you don't seem to value her.  You will do this, you will do that, you will report her to her parents, punish her bla bla!  It's your wife you are talking about here.  Something tells me your wife must have been taking a lot of these from you.  If you can talk like this about your wife in public, I wonder what you don't tell her in private!

Please calm down and be a man!  Being a man involves not acting on impulse.  We don't want to read another case of a man that butchered his wife.  Thank God you are not near her right now.  Take time to get to know the real reason why she acted that way.  Has she always been like this to your mum? Like someone pointed out, if they have not been the best of friends, asking her to go stay with your mum when she was vulnerable was not wise.  How is your attitude towards her own mum?  Do you go out of you way to please her in that regard?  She may just be getting back at you.

You sure sounded like you commanded her (as usual?) to go and spend the night with you mum, not minding the time of the night and the weather (hope it wasn't one of those heavy downpour days!!).  There are ways you can make your spouse do the unthinkable for you.  Learn how.  Talking to her in a derogatory, condescending and commanding manner is surely not one of them.

Take charge of your home.

Cheers.

Hi Ihebrooke. Great designs! Like I earlier said, it will be nice if you could add the external dimensions (e.g. 65 ft x 35 ft or 10m x 20m) to each of the lovely designs to enable someone know if they fit into his/her plot. Also, it won't be bad if you coan attach estimated cost to finish (e.g. N10m).

Great work.

Hi Ihebrooke.  Great designs you've got here!  You have notched up your designs.  Nice.  Please what are the dimensions (length and width) of the bungalow designs in posts #200 and #201?  It could have been nice to see what the inside looks like though.

Cheers.

Great thread everybody!  I have learnt a lot.  Kudos to you guys.

On Dosu_Ade's plan, I think a little adjustment can solve the dining/visitor's toilet problem by not making the toilet open directly to the dining as shown below:

@Bizbooks thanks a million. You are a great guy.

Cheers.

Kindly assist with this VIN: 4T3ZF13C4YU313951

Thanks.

@VALIDATOR, and somehow putting blood stains on himself, while managing to convince a woman he doesn't know to allow him make use of her phone and at the same time convincing a crowd to gather to help him convince his wife; all these happening in another town some 200km away from base still dressed in the lovely boxers and singlet his mistress graciously allowed him to leave with!!  He will have to be one hell of a practical joker to pull that off for an overnight sexual escapade!!! Don't you think?

in the first bold, how can they know where they are going if they are blindfolded.

Here:

Then they got to Ibadan and drove into the bush for a long time. Later they tied their faces and dropped them into another vehicle that continued the journey

From the story, the blindfolding occured after they got to Ibadan! Mind you, the man was not sleeping like the others and even if they blindfolded him I guess he would have known when they got to a big city, with the noise and traffic- there is no other city between Lagos and Ibadan.

Cheers.

Hi Everyone.

I got this in my mailbox from a friend.  This is a testimony of the delivering power of our God.  It's scary but real!     And in case you don't have a relationship with Jesus Christ, it's never too late to accept Him and be saved.  Jesus is real.  And to those who have given their lives to Him, it is a wake-up call to renew commitment and dedication to the Master.  Read and be blessed.

---

From: ----------------------
Sent: Wednesday, April 06, 2011 10:44 AM
To: -------------------------
Subject: FW: TESTIMONY OF HOW GOD SAVED MY HUSBAND

May God continue to keep us at this time. Safety is indeed of God.

.
        Read account of the Husband of our RIC.

        May God continue to protect us more especially this period where politician are clamoring for power.


        From: Sent: Monday, April 04, 2011 10:59 AM
        Subject: TESTIMONY OF HOW GOD SAVED MY HUSBAND



        I wish to share with us all a life experience of what happened to my husband on Thursday 31/03/2011.

        I received a call from my husband  at 3.02pm ,he informed me that he was going to pay our annual fee at the post office and thereafter ,he was going to see a business partner at alausa before finally going back to his office.



        At about 7pm same day, I received a call from his colleague who also lives in the same area with us, the man said he has not seen my husband and has not been able to get though to him through his phone and that every other person has left the office leaving only himself behind. I asked him to wait while I try to reach him tried his line but it was switched off. I also remembered that he had not charged his phone so well before we left the house that morning and I assumed that the battery must have ran down.

        The colleague later called to ask for my permission to bring my husband's car to the house as it was now getting late and no longer safe for him to keep hanging around their office area and I asked him to bring the car home while I continued trying his phone number.

        At about 9pm the line started ringing repeatedly with no one picking it as I just continued calling it over and over. Later the colleague also tried it and someone (not my husband)picked it talking carelessly that he was at iyana ipaja in Lagos, at that point I started suspecting foul play but by the time we tried the line again, it was switched off all through the night and even till now.



        I then began to call all the contacts I thought he could have been to see but all of them have not seen him even though he called them between 3-4 pm that he was coming to see them in ikeja. I later called my parents to inform them and then his dad who is also in Lagos. His dad asked me if I quarreled with him in the morning, upon answering that there was no quarrelling between us , he told me not to worry that he will surely come back and that I should go in with the children to bed. I called the number all through the night with no luck and I was just committing the situation to God to please sort it all out in my favour.


        The next morning at 6 am , I went to the police station to make a statement but I was declined as the police officer said I could only make a statement after a period of 24 hours that I last heard from him, so I was asked to return later in the day. They also carefully asked me if I had quarreled with him earlier that day to which I answered "no", they also insinuated that he might have followed some women away and that he would show up and if not, I will make a statement after which a warrant will be sent round  to all police stations nationwide to check if he was in the cell, then we would also go to the mortuary, thereafter we will check hospital wards and if by then he was not found we would place his  picture on the media for TV stations and radio houses to announce.

        At that point, I knew there was trouble if something doesn't happen soon.


        Myself and the colleague then left the station to their office in ikeja from where we planned to visit each and every one he mentioned he was going to see the previous day and then we planned to trace all ikeja axis to ketu to find out if any accidents had occurred the previous day.


        At about 8.57am while we were waiting for his boss to arrive , I received a call from a globacom number, I picked it and the voice on the other side said "it is me" I jumped up ,ran to his colleague and answered" you who "as if I did not recognize the voice ,even though I did, he then mentioned his name and it was my husband.  I then asked where he was and he answered that he was in ile-ife .  I asked him what he was doing there and he said he was kidnapped by ritualists, I was also hearing laud noises of several peoples voices underneath shouting " start coming o, ritualist attacked him o, he is not wearing any cloths o, we are many here,its on ede-road after the university gate, amongst other things"


        Not long after, his boss arrived and offered to take us in their official car to ile-ife. We got their around 1.30pm because we had close to 10 stoppages on the road by police men at check points, it was as if we were not going to get there.


        When we got there, I saw a crowd, I sam my husband , he was wearing just boxers and singlet and a Dunlop slippers. I felt sorry for him and I started weeping in appreciation to God. The women asked me what God I serve and that I should not fail to serve that God . some of them also called me by the name of one of my children because my husband had narrated his experience in the bush to them.


        His experience


        He entered a bus at 7up which was supposed to be going to ikeja which had 7 men, including my husband, 1 lady and a police man in front seat, upon getting to alausa, the driver diverted to maruwa gardens and then entered lagos-ibadan express way. Immediately he diverted, all the passengers in the bus began to shout , hitting the body of the bus and demanding to know where he was taking them to ,except the lady and the police man. When the noise was much, the driver released a kind of perfume which made all passengers to sleep off immediately except my husband who continued to shout and hit the bus asking them to drop him,the lady and the police man. The police man then pointed a gun at him commanding him to keep quiet but he wouldn't. the police then made a call to someone explaining that one of the passengers is not sleeping but making noise and asked if they should let him go but the other person asked how old my husband was to which the police responded that he should be less than 40 years of age. The other fellow then demanded that they must bring him along. Also the police and the lady searched the passengers, removed their cloths, belongings and wedding rings. Upon discovering a young guy who was not wearing a ring, they released another perfume to him nose and he woke immediately and they dropped him off.


        Then they got to Ibadan and drove into the bush for a long time. Later they tied their faces and dropped them into another vehicle that continued the journey. Then they descended a valley and climbed up again all still in the vehicle. Later they arrived a house ,they dropped them and they rested there for about 45minutes to 1 hour and then they put 5 of them  in another vehicle that took them further into a forest where they opened their faces and they saw a big duplex in the middle of the forest while they drove the other two people away. There were big cars packed and at the reception they saw people waiting and chatting. Someone began to introduce them to the people " these people on this side are politicians, these are musicians and these other sets are people waiting to become board member in their organizations, they are the ones that need things from you, we are introducing them because this is the last time you will see men in life"  at that point, he began to speak in tongues and to speak the word that "I shall not die"


        They later brought them to the ritual room introduced them to the priest who they claimed was 220 years old. They asked them to line up ,him being the first in line and then to begin to introduce themselves. He only responded with "I shall not die" two people introduced themselves as pastor so so and so of so so and so church. There was also a young guy whose father pastors in the united states and who is supposed to travel next Tuesday 5/4/2011 to meet his wife in USA. And then another man. The way they do it is to call someone's name, the person steps forward, they pour him water out of a horn ,the person spins very fast and then falls down, the ritualist throws his wedding ring which they had removed from their hands and labeled into a pot of concussion of which they have separate ones for all the men, the person falls down and two attendants come and carry the body away.

        They called my husband first but as he kept speaking in tongues and telling them that if he doesn't leave the shrine alive, non of them will leave alive, they asked him to stay aside that they will come to him later. They did the process on the others and also carried their bodies away. When it was the turn of the pastors son, they poured him the water, he rushed to my husband ,held his boxers and begged him not to let him go. My husband told him not to worry as his wife was praying at home. The ritualist moved the guy away shouting that two people don't die together in that shrine. The guy then began to stager and fell down, they threw his ring into a pot and the attendants came to carry him away, in the process, he jumped up again and upon seeing that, the priest said the guy was already mad and not good for the sacrifice and that the attendants should push him into the forest, which they did.


        It was now my husband's turn again, they called to him "I shall not die, it is your turn, step into the circle" he stepped out still speaking in tongues.

        They poured him the water but he refused to spin, at that point, his confidence increased and he kept firing on, upon seeing what happened, the priest went in and brought a red cloth that he threw on his neck then he started staggering, then he was afraid and quoted the scripture "he will give his angels charge over me" then he stabilized. The priest then went in to bring another thing, before then, he started crawling out of the shrine.

        It was then he saw the people earlier carried away, their heads had been cut off and parts of their bodies removed.

        He kept crawling on blood stains until someone came to his rescue and helped him up on his shoulder and gave him a brand new slippers.

        The fellow asked after his wife, and children mentioning them all by names, my husband became afraid and asked if they have gone to attack his family too but the man said no. he then told my husband that he is not serving "HIM" enough. That an assignment was completed that night and that was why they had to come rescue him. He told him that anything he will ever amount to in life is tied to the level of his service to "HIM" and that his service is not commensurate to the calling of God upon his life. My husband argued that he  is the choir director in his church but the fellow replied that my husband is just beginning. He brought out a medal and asked my husband if he remember praying about not haven achieved a medal in life, surprised, my husband said "I have never discussed that with any man before" the fellow said the medal will not be given to him yet.

        He also reminded my husband of many vows and pledges that he and me made  and those he made personally that are yet to be fulfilled and that those vows and pledges are waiting for fulfillment. My husband replied that it is because he does not have the means yet but the fellow said it is because he is not serving enough ,otherwise he would have had the means to fulfill them.  He told him several other things that are personal to my family as they walked on until they got to a point where he left him on the floor and made to leave and promised that he would send help to my husband. My husband slept there in the bush until around 8am in the morning when he began to hear the sound of vehicles moving, he moved towards the direction of the sound and saw the sign board being ile-ife. He approached a woman who was trying to open her shop that morning, to confirm if it was actually ile -ife ,but the woman was too afraid because of his dressing.  The woman later helped him with her phone with which he made a call through to me .


        I hope you have been blessed by the long epistle.


        IT PAYS TO SERVE THE LORD No one is perfect but God knows us all and is full of mercies and also he is the very present help in times of trouble.

        Let us all increase our commitment to him and if we have not accepted him into our lives, I implore us to do that today as tomorrow may be too late.



        GOD BLESS.

---

Chaircover!!

@Henrygirl, good to hear from you. Thank God for His dealings too. I pray He continues to mould you till you conform to His image. Unforgivenness is truly a cancer. It is so serious that our own forgiveness by God is even linked to our forgiving those who sin against us! So also, our prayers, fasting, offering etc! That's why The Lord said we shouldn't even give our gift/offerings if we have some issues to settle with someone!

May God grant us more grace.

Cheers.

Hi OLAADEGBU. It's another year of grace in His service. May He continually find us worthy of that great calling. Love to your family.

God bless.

God bless you grace5.

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