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Should I End The The Relationship? - Family (8) - Nairaland

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Advise Needed Please. / Throwback: What Is The Relationship Between These Two? / Re: Should I End The The Relationship? My Reply (2) (3) (4)

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Re: Should I End The The Relationship? by Pamelayoung: 4:44am On Oct 28, 2016
DarkRebel101:


Money is necessary in everything in life, maybe even more in marriage. But when we constantly draw the bead on it, especially in matters bordering on relationships, we should do well to remember that though it [Money] is necessary to make the centre hold, it has no ontological reality and is as transient as the anger of God.

So long as he has enough to cater for food, shelter, clothing, and other things incidental to a comfortable and healthy living, then she should be contented because he has attained the pass mark and is fit to be called a man.
If she wants anything beyond that then that is what we Yorubas would call Oloju kokoro.

...

There is nothing stopping her from getting married to him with the purpose of lending him a helping hand in accruing wealth in order to cater for the extras.

Even a small two-bedroom flat was not built in a day, talk less of Rome.

A man who cannot take decision for himself but allows his family to push him around, isn't fit to be called a man.
Re: Should I End The The Relationship? by Pamelayoung: 4:51am On Oct 28, 2016
Joavid:


abeg calm down, madam long-throat.

first, free that 27 year old bobo cos nothing he does for you is enough as long as the thought of your ex bank account gives you orgasms.

besides, what have you done with your life so far since you graduated?
Do you have a career?
Do you have goals and plans?

marriage is not an achievement.

You are mean, besides marriage is an achievement for some people
Re: Should I End The The Relationship? by WetSmoke: 4:51am On Oct 28, 2016
There is a reason he is an ex. Refresh your memory

1 Like

Re: Should I End The The Relationship? by macminista(m): 5:06am On Oct 28, 2016
[b][/b]
Billiondoe:
What are the characteristics of a good marriage, am 25 and single and staying in a relationship is like world war 2... seems like love is not all it takes... am in a relationship with a 27yr old man and we r In love and we are both university graduates but I dont think we can make it to the alter cos it's a different drama everyday, never caught him cheating and he respects me but his family controls a better part of him and he isn't ready for marriage anytime soon and I have this ex who is very willing all I have to do is tell him am ready and am no longer in a relationship[b], he is rich and has different cars and houses [/b]but am not so into him but he loves me for sure....
" go siddon wan place
Re: Should I End The The Relationship? by Kirinwa: 5:14am On Oct 28, 2016
TreasuredLeidy:
u're in love with ur present guy buh you are desperate to get married.
he doesn't cheat n he respects u, good to hear. Stick with him Gurl. when he's ready, sooner or later, he would propose.
I guess d drama is cos his folks control him, when u both are married, I don't think they wil control him again.

don't think of going back to ur ex cos it's obvious ur not in love with him but his Money.

#Shalom

He who wears the shoe knows where it pinches. She just said that the boyfriend's family control him and you are vouching for him that he will lose their control once he's married and this view has been the bane of many marriages. Infact we have treated such issues here in Nairaland sotay we don tire.As a matter of fact whatever you see in a relationship becomes magnified after marriage. There's no guarantee he will change or that he will marry her since he hasn't proposed or engaged her. Even people that got engaged break off engagement not to talk of this one.

My advice is to leave both of them and start afresh or marry the rich man atleast the money will console her that is if the rich man is not yet already married cos I envision a lot of shockers after the marriage. That's why I said she should start afresh.
Re: Should I End The The Relationship? by byvan03: 5:16am On Oct 28, 2016
Both men are not it. If the BF's family controls him, marriage cannot change that.
Re: Should I End The The Relationship? by byvan03: 5:17am On Oct 28, 2016
Kirinwa:


He who wears the shoe knows where it pinches. She just said that the boyfriend's family control him and you are vouching for him that he will lose their control once he's married and this view has been the bane of many marriages. Infact we have treated such issues here in Nairaland sotay we don tire.As a matter of fact whatever you see in a relationship becomes magnified after marriage. There's no guarantee he will change or that he will marry her since he hasn't proposed or engaged her. Even people that got engaged break off engagement not to talk of this one.

My advice is to leave both of them and start afresh or marry the rich man atleast the money will console her that is if the rich man is not yet already married cos I envision a lot of shockers after the marriage. That's why I said she should start afresh.


I didn't see this before my response, you are on point.
Re: Should I End The The Relationship? by Eddodoh(m): 5:24am On Oct 28, 2016
Billiondoe:
What are the characteristics of a good marriage, am 25 and single and staying in a relationship is like world war 2... seems like love is not all it takes... am in a relationship with a 27yr old man and we r In love and we are both university graduates but I dont think we can make it to the alter cos it's a different drama everyday, never caught him cheating and he respects me but his family controls a better part of him and he isn't ready for marriage anytime soon and I have this ex who is very willing all I have to do is tell him am ready and am no longer in a relationship, he is rich and has different cars and houses but am not so into him but he loves me for sure....
Your advice proves dat you are among d few women dat have sense. Please, marry me.
Re: Should I End The The Relationship? by Kaycee625(m): 5:25am On Oct 28, 2016
Billiondoe:
What are the characteristics of a good marriage, am 25 and single and staying in a relationship is like world war 2... seems like love is not all it takes... am in a relationship with a 27yr old man and we r In love and we are both university graduates but I dont think we can make it to the alter cos it's a different drama everyday, never caught him cheating and he respects me but his family controls a better part of him and he isn't ready for marriage anytime soon and I have this ex who is very willing all I have to do is tell him am ready and am no longer in a relationship, he is rich and has different cars and houses but am not so into him but he loves me for sure....
let me advise you like i would my sis, that 27 yr old dude isnt planing on getting married soon, and by the times he considers marriage u don turn gwegs,
so i would advise u give the rich dude a chance date him and see if u will develope feelings for him, once u do, go ahead and marry him, cos by the time the 27 yr old guy wants to marry,he might have gotten tired of you, and your endowments, then u will come here and start saying i am hurt,i dated him for years turned down rich suitors cos of him,now he is dumping me to marry a 23 yr old young graduate
all is fair in luv and war, no applogies

1 Like

Re: Should I End The The Relationship? by obowunmi(m): 5:41am On Oct 28, 2016
Billiondoe:
What are the characteristics of a good marriage, am 25 and single and staying in a relationship is like world war 2... seems like love is not all it takes... am in a relationship with a 27yr old man and we r In love and we are both university graduates but I dont think we can make it to the alter cos it's a different drama everyday, never caught him cheating and he respects me but his family controls a better part of him and he isn't ready for marriage anytime soon and I have this ex who is very willing all I have to do is tell him am ready and am no longer in a relationship, he is rich and has different cars and houses but am not so into him but he loves me for sure....

The truth of the matter is that no one is perfect.

Marry for love or marry for money, you still deal with sh**t.
Re: Should I End The The Relationship? by NLban: 5:48am On Oct 28, 2016
Dyt:
Mama's boy are the worse set of men to deal eith
angry angry angry
Now I see, Women are the most selfish and self centered set of people on earth.

When a woman is young and in relationship, all she craves for is how to control her man 100%.

By the time she gets old, all she wants is for her to control her children and even the boys, she wants her daughter inlaws to worship her.


#Women are control Frrrrrrreeeeeekkkkkk#

1 Like

Re: Should I End The The Relationship? by ikotun1987(m): 5:50am On Oct 28, 2016
Billiondoe:
What are the characteristics of a good marriage, am 25 and single and staying in a relationship is like world war 2... seems like love is not all it takes... am in a relationship with a 27yr old man and we r In love and we are both university graduates but I dont think we can make it to the alter cos it's a different drama everyday, never caught him cheating and he respects me but his family controls a better part of him and he isn't ready for marriage anytime soon and I have this ex who is very willing all I have to do is tell him am ready and am no longer in a relationship, he is rich and has different cars and houses but am not so into him but he loves me for sure....
Re: Should I End The The Relationship? by Nobody: 5:52am On Oct 28, 2016
DarkRebel101:


You can be fat with style — like Rick Ross and DJ Khaled.

You seem sharp. I have got my eyes on you from now on. tongue



Lol, I don't even like chubby in style and now we are talking about fat in style grin
Re: Should I End The The Relationship? by africanusvu(m): 5:57am On Oct 28, 2016
Seems u may giv this guy double title.2EX. ex guy and soon ex husband
Re: Should I End The The Relationship? by figment232(m): 6:02am On Oct 28, 2016
Just marry ur ex as quickly as possible, u wud always grow to love him, and besides ur present boo wudnt b ready for marriage until 5yrs from now,wen u wud be 30.....check am na!
Re: Should I End The The Relationship? by Blessedward: 6:18am On Oct 28, 2016
I thought u are done with ur script writing exams??didn't know u still in d sch
Re: Should I End The The Relationship? by mikebuddy(m): 6:19am On Oct 28, 2016

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tyqx5ShKNxo
Re: Should I End The The Relationship? by calvin0622(m): 6:23am On Oct 28, 2016
Billiondoe:
What are the characteristics of a good marriage, am 25 and single and staying in a relationship is like world war 2... seems like love is not all it takes... am in a relationship with a 27yr old man and we r In love and we are both university graduates but I dont think we can make it to the alter cos it's a different drama everyday, never caught him cheating and he respects me but his family controls a better part of him and he isn't ready for marriage anytime soon and I have this ex who is very willing all I have to do is tell him am ready and am no longer in a relationship, he is rich and has different cars and houses but am not so into him but he loves me for sure....
my dear u eat a cake and have it.an ex is an ex.ah after eating pomo throw away and still pick it and continue forever. Check he may be playing u.by the way was he rich when u left him?
Re: Should I End The The Relationship? by karbridals(f): 6:25am On Oct 28, 2016
My dear the truth is that u mighg end up not marrying this guy u Are in love with..this ur guy might not be ready in the next 3/4 and then u will be more than 3o and when he is finally ready,he might think u are too old for him..if this ur ex really loves u try and see if u can love him too but if not then dont go into it..u are only in a relationship with this ur guy and anything can happen anytime.uote author=Billiondoe post=50543655]What are the characteristics of a good marriage, am 25 and single and staying in a relationship is like world war 2... seems like love is not all it takes... am in a relationship with a 27yr old man and we r In love and we are both university graduates but I dont think we can make it to the alter cos it's a different drama everyday, never caught him cheating and he respects me but his family controls a better part of him and he isn't ready for marriage anytime soon and I have this ex who is very willing all I have to do is tell him am ready and am no longer in a relationship, he is rich and has different cars and houses but am not so into him but he loves me for sure.... [/quote]
Re: Should I End The The Relationship? by oluwashedy: 6:30am On Oct 28, 2016
truthsayer007:


Ehnnnn? Are you serious...i didn't know women like you are exist in Nigeria.

Abeg if you have a younger sis, Not too young sha...and that also thinks this same way, abeg link her to me.

As far as i know, Nigeria women never support their spouse financially, even after marriage they keep their own money & spend on their family only. The Assumption is that a Man is the head of the family, So he must provide for everything.

A girl even told me that it is my duty to rent her a house on the Island, because I am her BF. I swear...God knows am not lying about this.


My ex told me my duty is to be providing while she gives me sex. Often times when I try share my problems with she simply tells me its not her problem that as long as I'm dating her I'll suffer.
Re: Should I End The The Relationship? by braxjay(m): 6:40am On Oct 28, 2016
Dyt:
Mama's boy are the worse set of men to deal eith
angry angry angry


that's all.com
Re: Should I End The The Relationship? by puyol5: 6:41am On Oct 28, 2016
don't go back to your ex house ask Mourinho and Guardiola. They know better.
Re: Should I End The The Relationship? by drnoel: 6:41am On Oct 28, 2016
Billiondoe:
What are the characteristics of a good marriage, am 25 and single and staying in a relationship is like world war 2... seems like love is not all it takes... am in a relationship with a 27yr old man and we r In love and we are both university graduates but I dont think we can make it to the alter cos it's a different drama everyday, never caught him cheating and he respects me but his family controls a better part of him and he isn't ready for marriage anytime soon and I have this ex who is very willing all I have to do is tell him am ready and am no longer in a relationship, he is rich and has different cars and houses but am not so into him but he loves me for sure....

A sad day for poor hard working guys. The decision is urs, u got the hoe, the seeds and water to plant ur crops. When regrets set in later if any na fof ur head in go fall. Drnoel out
Re: Should I End The The Relationship? by sben2308(m): 6:42am On Oct 28, 2016
Billiondoe:
What are the characteristics of a good marriage, am 25 and single and staying in a relationship is like world war 2... seems like love is not all it takes... am in a relationship with a 27yr old man and we r In love and we are both university graduates but I dont think we can make it to the alter cos it's a different drama everyday, never caught him cheating and he respects me but his family controls a better part of him and he isn't ready for marriage anytime soon and I have this ex who is very willing all I have to do is tell him am ready and am no longer in a relationship, he is rich and has different cars and houses but am not so into him but he loves me for sure....





My dear I want u to understand that we online r good at giving advises like leave his is immature, his family will continue to be his mouth. You forget that over 60% of married man u see today, their family speaks for them and do u want him to jump n start saying Wat u want forgetting that if he does it. His family might dislikes u that u r controlling him.(note same happens to both party family man n female, no one is spare)

But Pls ask urself does he loves u, does he respect u and ask urself same d same abt him. If you answer is yes then I tell u that u will never regret it decision to be with him.

Forget ur ex that's doing very well cuz I am an example to that he wants to chop n clean mouth because a Lady has invested In him n u think he will just opt n b with u.
Lai lai o he wants to payback for wat happened n how u ended in d past.

so go n b with d man who loves u more Dan u deserve because he will Alwz strive to make u happy n d fight is also one of d things dt spice ur relationship cuz I know wen u don't fight for two days sometimes it looks like something is wrong.
But believe me Wat u r experiencing in ur rltnshp is a phase n it will pass..

1 Like

Re: Should I End The The Relationship? by boxer022(m): 6:50am On Oct 28, 2016
From your write up I can deduce that you do not know what you want for yourself. The young man you are currently dating has never done anything to wrong you in any way, the only problem you have with him is that you feel his family is controlling him. You also feel that it will be long before he will propose to you. On the other hand another young man who you called your ex, is rich and ready to marry you. He became your ex for a reason and under normal circumstances should not be in contact with you for anything relationship wise. I saw that the main reason for you considering him is that he is rich and has cars with houses. If he did not have all this I know you would have thrown him away for a long time. The only thing I will say is you have to be careful in the decisions you take because it may either make or mar you.

1 Like

Re: Should I End The The Relationship? by 9jii(m): 6:52am On Oct 28, 2016
TreasuredLeidy:
u're in love with ur present guy buh you are desperate to get married.
he doesn't cheat n he respects u, good to hear. Stick with him Gurl. when he's ready, sooner or later, he would propose.
I guess d drama is cos his folks control him, when u both are married, I don't think they wil control him again.

don't think of going back to ur ex cos it's obvious ur not in love with him but his Money.

#Shalom
@ Op, please don't fall for this .
It's always sweet and comfortin to be with young guys.the dreams and all fantasies will soon fade you ll be left with only reality when it's too late for you to wake up.

When you have real ready made man in your life please don't waste your time for fancy dreams.
Re: Should I End The The Relationship? by Nobody: 6:54am On Oct 28, 2016
Nobody on Diz thread bothered to ask the OP some few reasonable questions

1.....is the OP a working class lady cuz I believe your parent did not pay for ur higher institution bills just to graduate and start seeking for marriage?

2.....the guy in the picture earns 50k monthly,,,,,,but d bitter truth is how much is d OP earning monthly.......

3.....God knows maybe his family struggled to pay his bills throughout 4-5 tenure in school and u think u can now control him or make him focus on u.........family comes first before setting up your own family.......

4.....And to the rich dude promising you heaven and earth,,,,just remember a mongrel will always be a mongrel........we can pretend to be nice .......With money,d guy won't be after you cuz he can get classy,flashy babes around with cash .......d choice is yours

finally if you get yourself a good work and keep yourself busy,trust me you ll be surprised that you will hardly remember the 2 guys in d picture cuz u ll be getting better offers than just one offer..
...
Re: Should I End The The Relationship? by oribi(m): 7:07am On Oct 28, 2016
For me before you posted this topic you had made your choice already who you would like to end up with.You only needed to be justified in your action.I wish you the best in that regards.
Re: Should I End The The Relationship? by Nobody: 7:12am On Oct 28, 2016
@op, pls go on. No time to stay with a broke ass.





Dont come back to us for further advise. thanks
Re: Should I End The The Relationship? by Nobody: 7:19am On Oct 28, 2016
Billiondoe:
What are the characteristics of a good marriage, am 25 and single and staying in a relationship is like world war 2... seems like love is not all it takes... am in a relationship with a 27yr old man and we r In love and we are both university graduates but I dont think we can make it to the alter cos it's a different drama everyday, never caught him cheating and he respects me but his family controls a better part of him and he isn't ready for marriage anytime soon and I have this ex who is very willing all I have to do is tell him am ready and am no longer in a relationship, he is rich and has different cars and houses but am not so into him but he loves me for sure....

OP, you already taken a decision before coming here. So, stop seeking for attention. You're a drama queen!! cheesy cheesy cheesy grin
Re: Should I End The The Relationship? by Nobody: 7:24am On Oct 28, 2016
Billiondoe:
What are the characteristics of a good marriage, am 25 and single and staying in a relationship is like world war 2... seems like love is not all it takes... am in a relationship with a 27yr old man and we r In love and we are both university graduates but I dont think we can make it to the alter cos it's a different drama everyday, never caught him cheating and he respects me but his family controls a better part of him and he isn't ready for marriage anytime soon and I have this ex who is very willing all I have to do is tell him am ready and am no longer in a relationship, he is rich and has different cars and houses but am not so into him but he loves me for sure....
because of money u said ur boyfriend of 27yrs is being controllled by his parents? I know women very well, women can lie for africa, u are looking for a way to dump ur boyfriend go ahead and regret it in the future, tomorrow ur boyfriend can become rich u don't know how God works

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