peelovee: Greetings Dear NLs,
I am in big confussion right now!

My spouse and I have been dating since 2008, at the end of 2011 he went to see my parents to let them know his intention. after 2010 we had a misunderstanding which was his fault; that led to seperation. This kept me in a very tight heartbreak it took Gods grace for me to get on with my life again, without any relationship. He came begging, saying he has realize his faults so on and so forth, that I should forgive and give him a second chance that he is a change Person. 2012 November I decided to give him that second chance because of the Love I had for him. Jan 2013 He went for my introduction and traditional and white has been plan for April 27th cards has been distributed (All expenses 70% from my side, 15% from my parents,10% from my spouse). febraury fell ill seriously after, after treatment I discovered I was already 8weeks pregnant, I told my spouse, his response was not encouraging.

Just yesterday he called me and said he is no longer interested, that no tradition/wedding till after i deliver the baby. And that he want to inform me that he has relocated to the village to stay(I confirm this morning and it is true), and that I should have it in mind that i can not seperate him from his mum. even his mum called to confirm dat.

My mum called his mum last night and she told her the same story. She even went ahead to tell my mum that i am lucky they did my introduction before the pregnacy, that what about girls that gets pregnant without see who's is responsible.

I am totally confussed: this pregnacy is just my major concerned as it is almost ten weeks.
what should i do? advise

nawaaa for diz kid man

Morning all,

For the sponsoring of the wedding, It's just that it's her family that should pay 70% and not her. Where I come from, it's the bride that sponsors the wedding. For all my male cousins that wedded, we did nothing except cook a little for our special guests in case anything happens. For my female cousin, we spent ...

The deed is already done.

Take care of your baby and move on

PEOPLE!!
I dont know how many of you are single moms out there, if you are, you will know that that is not an easy route; however, marrying this guy...may make you miserable for the rest of your life, in life, you must choose ur fights, if u see the situation from afar, and still go headlong, then you cant blame anyone, u chose it; and love's got nothing to do with this, people have lost their lives and bright future in the name of so called love!
To some extent, i agree with KULYIE - as long as he's done introduction, etc, go with your family to see his family. Plead or whatever you can to get their support, whether partial or full, call elders into this matter (which is ur traditional Court), the man and his family must be made to support you through the pregnancy and delivery, because you were with him when you conceived, if there are doubts as to whether or not he is the father, then that can be proven after you have had the child thru DNA tests, but right now, the only proof of his fatherhood is your conceiving while with him, period! When you've had the baby and done the tests, you may choose which name your child bears. During pregnancy, While he supports you, that's not the end of life, get on your feet, look for something to do, earn some money and also take care of yourself, you dont owe the world any explanations, afterall, you've done introduction, and they saw, now ur pregnant, and he's in the village...perfect story! If you can, you may change location for a while, keep your mind active and your body healthy.
Do Not wait for him to come back...my dear, if i were you, i wont marry this kind of human being, everything is wrong about him, except ur not saying all truth...just go thru the process that will ensure that this baby is not called a bastard. What you should consider strongly now is this Child!! very important! You could make arrangements to keep the child for him, or if you think you can manage it, take the child...but its not what is happening now, but eventually how that child is raised. A lot of people are roaming the streets today, products of dysfunctional backgrounds like this. If you keep the child, you may keep contacts between them, so that there's no case of...I want my child! But if he still says that afterwards, ensure you educate this child, not against her father, but to know that she has a mother as well as a father, and this is the situation, teach her to handle it well. Prepare your mind for all that--i want my child drama, dont fight them, just send her over, and pray hard for your child! After a while, they will get tired and say --take ur child. And you take ur child...you could also come to an agreement that the child will holiday at their place from time to time, its ok. Just be a bit flexible but still strict, and they must be financially supportive.
I dont know what balls you have taking out a pregnancy at this stage, if you die, the guy will live and move on, and ur chapter don end! except you have nothing to live for in this world, abi are u a mistake, or did God put u here for a purpose?? Find ur purpose and fulfill it!

What to do??
(1) Give thanks to God for detaching that man from your life. Some blessings are hidden in trouble waters
(2) Sell all the resellable in the wedding things you have gathered and be grateful for a lucky escape.
(3) Rwgister in a hospital for anti-natal then take good care of yourself in preparation for motherhood.
(4) Reorganise your mind to forget this invader/deceitful man
Then pls ask God to forgive anyone who says you should have an abortion.
It is well with you and your unborn baby. Things happen that we cant phantom but God knows why.
Iwish you all the best.

Yield:

You and I are not saying the same thing oo. I didn't tell her to have the baby and drop him/her off at any of the family's doorsteps, neither am I blaming her for what happened, but encouraging her. The bolded part was for ladies out there to just be careful, myself included.

it is ONLY the BOLDED part of your post am thanking you for and nothing more,dont get it twisted

naanxie: That is why ℓ̊ said mistakes happen!! She made α mistke by not studyin d guy,how won't u know ur guys has been outta job 4 seven years?? But this has nothing 2do with her being pregnant!!thatz my point! This isn't premarital sex,she's married!! Pple dnt do church wedding dze dayz and †нα† doznt make them less of α christian!d guy is jst α deuche bag and α mama's boy!! She needs help,not slandering,if u can't advice,stay off d thread! Allow her keep her baby abeg,she isn't α kid!

how can an adult make such a dump and careless mistake.moreover i thought serious relationship is for 2 mentally,financially and socially matured individuals not teenagers by behaviour.i cant imagine an adult making the mistake a 16 year old girl in lust will make.moreover our elders say the more you grow the wiser you become.it beats my imagination why you peeps are making up excuses for her intense stewpeedity.if it was a 14 year old,i wouldn't have said much,but an adult for crying out loud.is it not stewpeed giving an adult s3x education,when its supposed to be for adolescents and teenagers just getting aware of their sexuality or exploring their s3xuality.in essence if its my teenage sister that made a mistake,i will just correct her in love and give her s3x education as well as helping her take care of the baby,but an adult she will be given extreme verbal lashing that will cost her her sleep.rubbish!

peelovee: I dont know what to do with this pregnacy.....
My fears: Its ten weeks and I dont know if it will be safe for termination
What about my life
What about My future


As for the marriage I have decided to let go..

advise pls

its not man that gives babies its God and they are gifts please keep the baby it did not do anything and as for the Guy he has just showed u he his not going to be there for u when shit hits the fan with his crazy mom they took u for granted and ur family as well. Its a sign he is not meant for u. Cancel the wedding and work hard for ur baby the man the lord put. For u will come and u will live happily ever after. After all no one wants a man who lies and can't take care of his family

kulyie: it is ONLY the BOLDED part of your post am thanking you for and nothing more,dont get it twisted

Kulyie, you quoted my whole post, top to bottom, so don't tell me you were only referring to the bolded part. And no one asked for your thanks. It was not appreciated because your comments in this thread have been uncalled for. In fact, I was annoyed you quoted my post, lol.

Smh. Different types of witchcraft here and there. People are running away from the village,others are going there;to do what?

Many Thanks for all your post.

All that I needed is advise, not judgemental posts.

I pray this never happen to any of you or someone close/related to you.

peelovee: I dont know what to do with this pregnacy.....
My fears: Its ten weeks and I dont know if it will be safe for termination
What about my life
What about My future


As for the marriage I have decided to let go..

advise pls

I know some people will come here to preach how bad Abortion is in the sight of God and man
and how you might not get another child again.
My dear, I will advice you terminate the pregnancy, its unwanted. That guy don't deserve you or
you carrying his baby please dear. I don't want to start arguing what is right or wrong on this
abortion issue cos i understnd how some of my beloved Nigerians reason.

Go to a good hospital, meet a professional and abort the IT.

Yield:

Kulyie, you quoted my whole post, top to bottom, so don't tell me you were only referring to the bolded part. And no one asked for your thanks. It was not appreciated because your comments in this thread have been uncalled for. In fact, I was annoyed you quoted my post, lol.

quoting your whole post was a MISTAKE and as for the thanks,i withdraw it,you dont have to appreciate it,as for my posts,that is kulyie for you,i dont act nice or respectful when home truths needs to be knocked into some people's skull,i owe nobody any apology for that

Miss Ope: Kulyie..... Enof of ur advise. She's heard U... Fine the Op has realised her mistakes but d deal is done already however, ur choice of words are very harsh and not encouraging and ... Like seriously u must be very mean and harsh...U'RE adding Fuel to an already burning Fire... Wetin sef.... Are u this moral?... Before u let loose ur verbal missiles on me... I must say this... Learn To be Subtle with ur choice of words for an already aggrieved person.......

ok

kulyie: yes,majority of them except for divine intervention quote me anywhere,kulyie said so.they lack fatherly love and discipline,that is why they are animalistic in nature moreover the reason why i said the lady should go back and beg them is to save herself the embarassment and shame of cancellation of wedding and now single motherhood,no how people will know the reason for the break up sooner or later.in actual sense,all things been equal,it is the family of the man that should be petting her,carrying her with so much respect and if per adventure she decides one day to break up,its them that should be running to beg her but since she has sold her dignity,she has no choice.its either she begs him to marry her and when they marry,cover up and bury the shame than expose her shame for the whole world to see,take it or live it,people gossip a lot especially women.neighbours are there,they will point fingers at her at her back,if she goes to the saloon,the same thing,church the same thing.mshewww

kulyie: yes,majority of them except for divine intervention quote me anywhere,kulyie said so.they lack fatherly love and discipline,that is why they are animalistic in nature moreover the reason why i said the lady should go back and beg them is to save herself the embarassment and shame of cancellation of wedding and now single motherhood,no how people will know the reason for the break up sooner or later.in actual sense,all things been equal,it is the family of the man that should be petting her,carrying her with so much respect and if per adventure she decides one day to break up,its them that should be running to beg her but since she has sold her dignity,she has no choice.its either she begs him to marry her and when they marry,cover up and bury the shame than expose her shame for the whole world to see,take it or live it,people gossip a lot especially women.neighbours are there,they will point fingers at her at her back,if she goes to the saloon,the same thing,church the same thing.mshewww

kulyie: yes,majority of them except for divine intervention quote me anywhere,kulyie said so.they lack fatherly love and discipline,that is why they are animalistic in nature moreover the reason why i said the lady should go back and beg them is to save herself the embarassment and shame of cancellation of wedding and now single motherhood,no how people will know the reason for the break up sooner or later.in actual sense,all things been equal,it is the family of the man that should be petting her,carrying her with so much respect and if per adventure she decides one day to break up,its them that should be running to beg her but since she has sold her dignity,she has no choice.its either she begs him to marry her and when they marry,cover up and bury the shame than expose her shame for the whole world to see,take it or live it,people gossip a lot especially women.neighbours are there,they will point fingers at her at her back,if she goes to the saloon,the same thing,church the same thing.mshewww

u r a very rung person to seek advice from.so just because of disgrace and wot people will say she should go nd becm slave to dem.is it nt said dat a broken relationship is beta dan a destroyed marriage.

sammyzacks: @kulie, are you sure you were raised well at all? Everything you said contradicts the morality you are trying to preach.you sound like Satan and you should just shut up!
@ poster, I advice that you keep the baby.One day you will look back and be proud of that decision.Believe God for a good future.Work hard and be happy.Learn from your mistakes. God will give you another husband that will accept you for you.

i will not reply a foolish and unwise statement,however if you are a christian you are a huge embarassment to everything christianity and jesus represents.pala pala

cecegorgeous: [sub][/sub]
u r a very rung person to seek advice from.so just because of disgrace and wot people will say she should go nd becm slave to dem.is it nt said dat a broken relationship is beta dan a destroyed marriage.

ok

Kulyie, unfortunately, the problem with your intention is that you're going to get the opposite effect (which you are, in this thread). Smh.

Networkmaster:

I know some people will come here to preach how bad Abortion is in the sight of God and man
and how you might not get another child again.
My dear, I will advice you terminate the pregnancy, its unwanted. That guy don't deserve you or
you carrying his baby please dear. I don't want to start arguing what is right or wrong on this
abortion issue cos i understnd how some of my beloved Nigerians reason.

Go to a good hospital, meet a professional and abort the IT.

Thank You

Nigerians are so stupid

Notice the only "advice" they have given is how evil abortion is, nothing else. Well other than blaming her for not being smart, everything else is just illiterate gibberish. No real solid advice at all.

Im still baffled that people come to these people for advice/help. I'd sooner jump off a cliff.

@OP- Following your history, the issue of pregnancy on nairaland came up on a thread in the past and here was someone's comment:

tollu: This kind of topic can only come up because a lot of us see children as the reason for marriage and that's why we hear cases of people advising women to just concentrate on their kids whenever marriages are having issues.
I have always said it out loud that my future kids come after my husband because he is my chosen companion.

Once we can see that the reason one should get married is to have another human to love, hold and cherish then all this pregnancy before marriage nonsense would stop.
if all you are after is kids, why not go adopt a whole orphanage?

Here was your reply to this comment:

peelovee:


Word!

Here is the link to that comment: https://www.nairaland.com/730435/what-views-pregnancy-before-marriage/2#8885611


My dear OP, you always knew the right thing to do but you did otherwise

Sorry.

Also @OP, it is obvious you want to abort that baby because from your past posts, it can be deduced that you once had an abortion:

https://www.nairaland.com/405942/condoms-postinor-2-advice-n#5662613

peelovee:

You are 100% correct.

My experience
I took postonor 2 within 24hrs of unprotected sex,  expecting to get 95% efficacy.
After 2 weeks there was nothing like mentral cycle, since it Curtail/prolong MC i was having the full assurance that my MC must surely come. After one month there was nothing like MC so i decided to go for PT, I was shocked when the  Doctor confirmed that I was 4weeks pregnant .

My friend took 4 tablets of postonor2 within 72hrs of unprotected sex,  expecting to get 95% efficacy as well.
She has not seen her MC for 2months and she is not pregnant.

Please avoid POSTONOR 2, GO 4 GOLD CYCLE .

This post was back in 2010. Where exactly is that baby from the 4 weeks pregnancy??

You are a dangerous and loose girl Peelove. God help you

kulyie: hahahaha the truth is always bitter unfortunatly it must still be told,pele deal with it and by the way what is my buisness if you are screwing a girl of easy virtue.let me give you an advise,make sure you stick your dck into any part of her body that has a hole,infact it wont be a bad idea if you stick your john thomas into her anus,ears,nose,crazy immoral freak.na the thing wey you chop na im go beleful you.dem no dey tell person.i dont need to be replying all your rants because you are just an embodiment of perversion,ruled by the tail in between your legs,mshewwww,oshisko,and he,when your present prostitute gets preggy,make sure you run o,take off to a village where no one can find you,good luck to you.

about "easy virtue",i stay at ilorin,find your way here and see how long it will take me to have your saliva on my prick... 2,about getting a girl "preggy";that wont happen,and if it does,why the f would i run? maybe,i ranted,infact yes i did and im very sorry for that,but the fact is that i get heated up by hypocrites like you,very stupid persons who talk without regard for others' feelings. and my point remains that i am very sure you arenot as pure as you would have us beleive.

pDude: Also @OP, it is obvious you want to abort that baby because from your past posts, it can be deduced that you once had an abortion:

https://www.nairaland.com/405942/condoms-postinor-2-advice-n#5662613




This post was back in 2010. Where exactly is that baby from the 4 weeks pregnancy??

You are a dangerous and loose girl Peelove. God help you

So because she once had a DC (if she did), she's now dangerous and loose?

You only have the moral right to call her that if you have never sinned before.

bukatyne:

So because she once had a DC (if she did), she's now dangerous and loose?

You only have the moral right to call her that if you have never sinned before.

Did you read the entire thread at all?

D/C indeed. She is trying to figure out if to do the D/C again. So she is an angel then?

Fvck outta here

kulyie: yes,majority of them except for divine intervention quote me anywhere,kulyie said so.they lack fatherly love and discipline,that is why they are animalistic in nature moreover the reason why i said the lady should go back and beg them is to save herself the embarassment and shame of cancellation of wedding and now single motherhood,no how people will know the reason for the break up sooner or later.in actual sense,all things been equal,it is the family of the man that should be petting her,carrying her with so much respect and if per adventure she decides one day to break up,its them that should be running to beg her but since she has sold her dignity,she has no choice.its either she begs him to marry her and when they marry,cover up and bury the shame than expose her shame for the whole world to see,take it or live it,people gossip a lot especially women.neighbours are there,they will point fingers at her at her back,if she goes to the saloon,the same thing,church the same thing.mshewww

A more sensible person than u was weeping for u and u still come back to open ur ignorant mouth? So all the people looting nigeria, all the useless politicians, the absu rapists, the boko harams are fatherless people? Am disappointed u even understand english

life is a contrast sha @ op....my own girlfriend got pregnant and i told her to keep it. she aborted it insisting she'll only keep it if i can show her 5million naira in my acct....i just laffed and freed her...she's ex now...bloody igbo gurls...despite my decission to marry her o and start up together,,,,she's hunting for her big boy already set man...fish brain..lol...@ op free the dude and keep the babe if he doesnt want you....or take it out if you have the mind sha...wish you the best...

iagdb: PEOPLE!!
I dont know how many of you are single moms out there, if you are, you will know that that is not an easy route; however, marrying this guy...may make you miserable for the rest of your life, in life, you must choose ur fights, if u see the situation from afar, and still go headlong, then you cant blame anyone, u chose it; and love's got nothing to do with this, people have lost their lives and bright future in the name of so called love!
To some extent, i agree with KULYIE - as long as he's done introduction, etc, go with your family to see his family. Plead or whatever you can to get their support, whether partial or full, call elders into this matter (which is ur traditional Court), the man and his family must be made to support you through the pregnancy and delivery, because you were with him when you conceived, if there are doubts as to whether or not he is the father, then that can be proven after you have had the child thru DNA tests, but right now, the only proof of his fatherhood is your conceiving while with him, period! When you've had the baby and done the tests, you may choose which name your child bears. During pregnancy, While he supports you, that's not the end of life, get on your feet, look for something to do, earn some money and also take care of yourself, you dont owe the world any explanations, afterall, you've done introduction, and they saw, now ur pregnant, and he's in the village...perfect story! If you can, you may change location for a while, keep your mind active and your body healthy.
Do Not wait for him to come back...my dear, if i were you, i wont marry this kind of human being, everything is wrong about him, except ur not saying all truth...just go thru the process that will ensure that this baby is not called a bastard. What you should consider strongly now is this Child!! very important! You could make arrangements to keep the child for him, or if you think you can manage it, take the child...but its not what is happening now, but eventually how that child is raised. A lot of people are roaming the streets today, products of dysfunctional backgrounds like this. If you keep the child, you may keep contacts between them, so that there's no case of...I want my child! But if he still says that afterwards, ensure you educate this child, not against her father, but to know that she has a mother as well as a father, and this is the situation, teach her to handle it well. Prepare your mind for all that--i want my child drama, dont fight them, just send her over, and pray hard for your child! After a while, they will get tired and say --take ur child. And you take ur child...you could also come to an agreement that the child will holiday at their place from time to time, its ok. Just be a bit flexible but still strict, and they must be financially supportive.
I dont know what balls you have taking out a pregnancy at this stage, if you die, the guy will live and move on, and ur chapter don end! except you have nothing to live for in this world, abi are u a mistake, or did God put u here for a purpose?? Find ur purpose and fulfill it!

Bull crap!
What type of support does a pregnant woman need from an unemployed village tout living with his mother who left her pregnant
Nonsense
Some of u should watch what u advise others

peelovee: Many Thanks for all your post.

All that I needed is advise, not judgemental posts.

I pray this never happen to any of you or someone close/related to you.

Friend, don't allow the posts that does not sound too good to you affect you okay. You asked for advise and as we all are not the same, there are bound to be diverse views to your case. Don't go feeling sad-sad-unhappy because of what some other persons feel about this. I've already posted my own view, I'm only moved to reach out to you by your last post.
You seem to have made some decisions out of naivety and other concerns of your heart. If this young man is running scared from getting married there is nothing you can do than to let him be. I'm sure that someday you will even smile again and thank God that he left. Your mother supposed to be guiding you good at this point, be careful whatever you finally decide to do and please don't hurt yourself in anyway. 27th April is almost here and I'm sure that you may not be feeling good at all about the way things turned out but some things does work together for our own good even when we may be feeling down when it's all working piece by piece. We are all humans and sometimes make mistake, go to God at this point and unburden your heart to him as well as make him your friend. He will definitely make a way, okay Baby?

chief batiatus:

A more sensible person than u was weeping for u and u still come back to open ur ignorant mouth? So all the people looting nigeria, all the useless politicians, the absu rapists, the boko harams are fatherless people? Am disappointed u even understand english

and i am amazed by your degree of unintelligence.when some nigerians voted scumbags,riff raffs and sold their collective birthrights for peanuts without checking their level of iq,character and the TYPE OF HOME they come from,whose fault,no its mine. abeg desist from giving examples that dont sum up.

koonbey: ABOUT "EASY VIRTUE",i stay at ilorin,FIND YOUR WAY HERE AND SE HOW LONG IT WILL TAKE ME TO HAVE YOUR SALIVA ON MY PRICK... 2,about getting a girl "preggy";that wont happen,and if it does,why the f would i run? maybe,i ranted,infact yes i did and im very sorry for that,but the fact is that i get heated up by hypocrites like you,very stupid persons who talk without regard for others' feelings. and my point remains that i am very sure you arenot as pure as you would have us beleive.

as for the capitalized part,i will first answer that because the first will lead to answers to the rest of your sorry tales. First of all the fact that you are presently screwing a loose girl does nt mean all ladies are loose.there is an adage that says he who is down needs fear no fall,the girl is down already,she has no self worth that is why she can sleep with anything that is a man,not all ladies think that way,there are still some ladies that have self value,self worth,respects themselves and use their brains,instead of how wet their hole is.2ndly that others choose not to follow your school of thought about morality or shutting your legs does not mean they are hypocrites.yes you are right that hypocrites abound however not all who are opposed to immorality are hypocrites.3 people of your kind want to eat your cake and still have it.you want to screw every girl that says yes to you,however when you are ready to settle down,you will say the present w,hore you are fvcking is not a 'wife material',you need a decent girl for a wife,so if those 'decent girls' chose to fling their legs open for every guy that wooed them before they met you,am sure you will not see any decent girl on this planet,4.if those girls got pregnant for a man that is not worth to be called a man in everysense of the word but only looks like a man in body before she realised he is not mr right,will you still marry an after 1.shebi numerous threads about virginity is all over nairaland,your likes are looking for virgins to marry while screwing one little LovePeddler before marriage,so who is the hypocrite and lastly the truth does not care about respecting of feelings because there is a yoruba adage that says if 2 sisters enter into a room and come out smiling,they have not told each other the truth,they are deceiving themselves,but if they come out bitter,angry or frowning,they have told each other the truth

Yield: Kulyie, unfortunately, the problem with your intention is that you're going to get the opposite effect (which you are, in this thread). Smh.

the yoruba elders say if 2 sisters enter into a room and come out smiling,they have not told each other the home truth,they are only deceiving themselves,but if they come out angry,bitter,with a frowning face,then they have told each other the truth.i am not an entertainer that will make anyone happy,especially when the truth needs to be sunk in HOWEVER you dont have to accept my opinion o.IT IS NOT COMPULSORY,the ball is in op's court.she is the chief executive officer of her life,not me

pDude:

Did you read the entire thread at all?

D/C indeed. She is trying to figure out if to do the D/C again. So she is an angel then?

Fvck outta here

@bolded, To you, me or the OP?

Does she just decide to do the DC because she feels like?

I am not supporting DC, I telling you NOT to call her names because no one is really better than she is.

A girl that has one boyfriend she sleeps with is no better than a prostitute. A person who tells 'harmless' lies is no better than an armed robber. etc.

kulyie: as for the capitalized part,i will first answer that because the first will lead to answers to the rest of your sorry tales. First of all the fact that you are presently screwing a loose girl does nt mean all ladies are loose.there is an adage that says he who is down needs fear no fall,the girl is down already,she has no self worth that is why she can sleep with anything that is a man,not all ladies think that way,there are still some ladies that have self value,self worth,respects themselves and use their brains,instead of how wet their hole is.2ndly that others choose not to follow your school of thought about morality or shutting your legs does not mean they are hypocrites.yes you are right that hypocrites abound however not all who are opposed to immorality are hypocrites.3 people of your kind want to eat your cake and still have it.you want to screw every girl that says yes to you,however when you are ready to settle down,you will say the present w,hore you are fvcking is not a 'wife material',you need a decent girl for a wife,so if those 'decent girls' chose to fling their legs open for every guy that wooed them before they met you,am sure you will not see any decent girl on this planet,4.if those girls got pregnant for a man that is not worth to be called a man in everysense of the word but only looks like a man in body before she realized he is not mr right,will you still marry an after 1.shebi numerous threads about virginity is all over nairaland,your likes are looking for virgins to marry while screwing one little LovePeddler before marriage,so who is the hypocrite and lastly the truth does not care about respecting of feelings because there is a yoruba adage that says if 2 sisters enter into a room and come out smiling,they have not told each other the truth,they are deceiving themselves,but if they come out bitter,angry or frowning,they have told each other the truth

dear,you sound like a very insecure Girl,hmmmn,maybe lashing out at others helps you feel good about yourself?hm...about your proverb;im sure the Elders you mentioned would be very appalled at your bastardization of their Words,wait,after they have told each other the truth and are frowning,in your house they continue doing so perpetually right?is it not the same arms that a mother uses to spank her children that she uses to cuddle them moments later? we have all heard your opinions on the op's morality,now's the time to get off your high horse and help her with constructive advice,if that is too much for you...shut the f up! anywaix,i wont reply your comments on me cos i dont know where you heard me say i'd be looking for a Virgin when i want to marry,and in the intrest of keeping this thread on course. P.S. i noticed you didnt answer my main point,that you are definitely not as pure as you would have us believe.