Ibukunjah: Issues of marriage are best handled not by 'fire for fire' approach. You have to play the mature role and never make moves that will tear your marriage apart as I think that should be the last resort. Remember, divorce usually affect the children adversely emotionally and mentally.
Have you tried talking to someone she may listen to, perhaps her parents?
Are you sure she is not reacting to ill-treatment from your parents or yourself?
The point is: Try find out why she behaves the way she does.

All times cannot be quarrel times. There will be times when you both will feel happy together. Take advantage of those times and constructively approach the issue, never with the intention of winning the argument but winning your partner.

I understand that the relationship was not based on heartfelt love but on unavoidable responsibility. That alone is a factor in resolving issues but that does not mean it cannot work out at last.

Why not take this power-packed free email course that is helping many Nigerian marriages. It is available here: http://surefamilytips.com/Mistakes.htm

Pray and work hard, try your best and never think divorce is the first option.

Na so that gospel singer do am so tay e reach wen him wyf slice im pr*ck o. @ op no form mumu o!, b4 ur own case go come worse o! ehen!, is either u take control or find ur square root.

Ibukunjah: Issues of marriage are best handled not by 'fire for fire' approach. You have to play the mature role and never make moves that will tear your marriage apart as I think that should be the last resort. Remember, divorce usually affect the children adversely emotionally and mentally.
Have you tried talking to someone she may listen to, perhaps her parents?
Are you sure she is not reacting to ill-treatment from your parents or yourself?
The point is: Try find out why she behaves the way she does.

All times cannot be quarrel times. There will be times when you both will feel happy together. Take advantage of those times and constructively approach the issue, never with the intention of winning the argument but winning your partner.

I understand that the relationship was not based on heartfelt love but on unavoidable responsibility. That alone is a factor in resolving issues but that does not mean it cannot work out at last.

Why not take this power-packed free email course that is helping many Nigerian marriages. It is available here: http://surefamilytips.com/Mistakes.htm

Pray and work hard, try your best and never think divorce is the first option.

Na so that gospel singer do am so tay e reach wen him wyf slice im pr*ck o. @ op no form mumu o!, b4 ur own case go come worse o! ehen!, is either u take control or find ur square root.

You're the one complicating issues and not your wife,you have failed to understand her,have giving up on her,tagged her a devil.men're like children,treat them as you would a child! This is where she has her shortcoming,because if i were ur wife,in a sure but subtle approach i'll let you understand that there's no way in the world I'm allowing my mother-in-law raise my children for me,no thanks,not when I'm still breathing,you scared the poor woman into rebelling against you,with your idea that some kids live with their grandparents till sec school level:maybe in the movies or in extreme cases where your wretched or both parents died the same time.your wife doesn't want stories for when a handshake goes beyond the elbow..that's why she wouldn't even allow the kids to visit your parents.where she got violent and tore your shirt,i would say you had it coming Doc.that your an only son is not really her problem,the children are,however difficult i think you should have mentioned it to her,your parents cannot just walk into your home and you say'honey pack a bag for the kids,they're going with them for new year'It's only a very dumb angel that might say no problem sweetheart just a moment.my sister's married to an only child and to the best of my knowledge they're not having this problem,the husband is not trying to compensate his parents with his own children and believe me they have plenty-three girls and two boys and he loves his parents too,stop reading meaning into everything your wife does or say,it's only natural for her to relate more with her parents,and forgive my asking this but how exposed and enlightened are your parents?it could also be a factor.my father went to U.I and my mother went to poly,they're more free when compared to my parents-in law and my husband always suggests for the kids to go to my place even though his family house is more comfortable.you need to have a long serious conversation with your wife,get to know her fears,try and understand why she's been acting up,i don't think marriage is this difficult and complicated,we just allow our ego get in the way of our happiness,we'll see who will back down first,in every relationship,one person must play the fool for the other,if not all the time then sometimes and there goes my best love song-endless love.

Much2do: You're the one complicating issues and not your wife,you have failed to understand her,have giving up on her,tagged her a devil.men're like children,treat them as you would a child! This is where she has her shortcoming,because if i were ur wife,in a sure but subtle approach i'll let you understand that there's no way in the world I'm allowing my mother-in-law raise my children for me,no thanks,not when I'm still breathing,you scared the poor woman into rebelling against you,with your idea that some kids live with their grandparents till sec school level:maybe in the movies or in extreme cases where your wretched or both parents died the same time.your wife doesn't want stories for when a handshake goes beyond the elbow..that's why she wouldn't even allow the kids to visit your parents.where she got violent and tore your shirt,i would say you had it coming Doc.that your an only son is not really her problem,the children are,however difficult i think you should have mentioned it to her,your parents cannot just walk into your home and you say'honey pack a bag for the kids,they're going with them for new year'It's only a very dumb angel that might say no problem sweetheart just a moment.my sister's married to an only child and to the best of my knowledge they're not having this problem,the husband is not trying to compensate his parents with his own children and believe me they have plenty-three girls and two boys and he loves his parents too,stop reading meaning into everything your wife does or say,it's only natural for her to relate more with her parents,and forgive my asking this but how exposed and enlightened are your parents?it could also be a factor.my father went to U.I and my mother went to poly,they're more free when compared to my parents-in law and my husband always suggests for the kids to go to my place even though his family house is more comfortable.you need to have a long serious conversation with your wife,get to know her fears,try and understand why she's been acting up,i don't think marriage is this difficult and complicated,we just allow our ego get in the way of our happiness,we'll see who will back down first,in every relationship,one person must play the fool for the other,if not all the time then sometimes and there goes my best love song-endless love.

Sorry dear, we, men are not longer comfortable playing the fools for peace to reign. Even if his parents live in the village, remember that without those villagers, her husband wouldn't have been a city dweller. Let's be real here, the husband might be wrong in some ways but the wife is a big fool to fight her hubby even to the extent of tearing his clothes. I keep saying this, 60% of Nigerian ladies are not "marriageable". Go to other african countries and see what a wife should be

Haunted:

Mr I take pride in being a murderer, I can't believe you just typed this.. You mean you beat your wife to be to the extent that It could have been man slaughter and you are advocating the same thing here?

The only way you could prove yourself as a man in your relationship was to almost kill someone else's daughter? It is very pathetic to read that you take so much pride in this violent act you committed. She misbehaved again, probably slapped you again, but did you have to go to the extent of beating the hell out of her in a moving car?? Why didn't you just return the slap and let her go forever? You weren't married to her yet, were you?

I guess you are happy and you feel manly thet your wife lives in fear, knowing at the back of her mind that her husband can be a beast anytime she misbehaves?

Would you beat your troublesome\wayward daughter or son to this state just to prove you are the father?


Op, for your own good, do not follow this guy's 'decisive moment advice', you could end up behind bars or hung to death...

Marriage is not a do or die affair, if you can not fix it after several genuine attempts, get out of it.

Why u dey use paracetamol for another woman's headache?
was she beaten or forced to say "i do" later on at the alter?

the problem with the OP is that he has not yet proven to be man.

That is wat we get when we had sex with spouse before marriage. A woman you had sex with b4 marriage, already has the leadership of that family in her hands, i know some people will eat me raw for this, who cares, that's the truth. May God restore you my bro and return your leadership power as the head of the family. Divorce is not always the ryt option, ur first woman is very important.

@ the OP,go through all the posts and read techwalker007
Read all his posts
that is your fellow man and he gave you the most candid counsel here
He said everything I wanted to say
If you wanted to hear from some small immature boys,you must have read loads
If you want the truth,read the poster I just mentioned and do the right thing
Time for some introspection

Ada Nri1: Op what did your in laws do to her. There must have been a trigger.

I suffered in the hands of my mother in law. My husband was a witness to most of her attacks but didn't do anything. I bore it all.
I tolerate her for the sake of my children. Women are different, find out the cause and you've solved the problem.

Women are no saints
But one thing I know is that no woman comes into her husband home to show her parents in law pepper
None whatsoever
Women come in and want to take them as her own parents but what they are met with oftentimes is not what they bargained for so what does she do?
She builds a wall to shut them off as a self protective mechanism
This is an only child ,born 8 solid after his parent's marriage who has entertained and voiced ideas to send the two kids to his parents for a period as some sort of compensation.
Nonsense
The same man brings in his parents without her knowledge to take the kids for the holidays
That is one example,who knows what else he had done in the past that scared this woman to death
Every woman with blood in her veins will resist that move with her life
I would too

opetu: My wife has been a torn on my flesh, giving me headaches daily. It happens dat I met her in my final year in school (fellowship), we got close just as friends nd within 7 mnths of knowing her one thing led to the other nd she got pregnant for me, well i accepted my responsibilty. telling my parents also , It was actually a thing of mixed feelingz, bein dat i am the only child of my parentz, at least thats like having a second child for dem. Long story short i decided to marry her cos of the baby..wit the notion dat we woud build our early relationship in marriage ..

Now issue is dat My wife doesnt like d idea when my parent come see me in my home, alwayz grummble, she doesn have a close relationship wit my mom, mom is alwayz sad about this..I ve been married for 5years now, ma kids ve only visited my parents for a week, anytime i bring up d idea of dem goin to see them..we always quarell!! just last week sunday ma parents left their home so dey come take d kids for d nu year break, i ddnt tell ma wife, but she found out, it was a fight that happened ....wit her tearing my clothes.. my old man nd momma both cried seein dis, dey had to travel back dat evening seein dat my so called wife ddnt welcome dem in my home, Dis is just d little i can narrate !!

I have two kids now, i kinda hate having a second child wit her, now am thinking divorce, which i dnt want to, tried to b patient, but its like shez getting evil advice from sumplaces everyday, how many years more does my parents ve on earth dat i wont make dem happy at least to be wit their grandkids!! at first i thought dis was normal, or is it a normal thing for mothers to cling to their child dat way?? maybe am too soft on her!! sigh i wish i never married her d first place, i only wanted to rewrite my mistake by marryin her.

Gosh
I couldn't help it


How many times have you told her to her face how you married her to take the shame of pregnancy off her
With the the way you are carrying on here,I bet the woman gets that sorry line every solitary moment
Besides the other selfish reason about populating your father's compound
Nonsense!
You regret having a second child with her?,infact you hate having a second child
What father says that about their own child/children?
She is a torn in your flesh
What a wuss
You regret the first child,you regret the second,you regret your marriage
Your whole life is full of regrets,when will you grow up and be a man?
What a zero

The Bible says a man shall leave his father and mother and cleave to his wife
You haven't read that part abi?
Read that first post,it's all about your parents
Where does this woman come in right in this marriage of yours
You married her because she was carrying a child that will be like a second child to your parents
You hate her yet she birthed yet another child
Now you and your parents want to turn her into a mere uterus ,baby making machine since you can wake up and make decisions regarding the children she carried 9 months a piece sotay your parents will waka from their abode to come and take the kids
You do have a nerve don't you?
You are lucky it was just your torn clothes,some mothers would have attacked both you and your parents and NTA will come and snap foto

Do you want real truth or you want some small boys advising you
Retrace your steps
If you divorce this woman and keep the same parents and same mindset,I promise you,you will divorce again unless the next wife is barren and or jobless.
If you doubt me try it

I wish the woman will even wake up and divorce you when she gets wind of exactly what you think of the union
She is a medical doctor you say,she can do without your immature self

m-ployer:
The story sounds incomplete. Your wife is having problem wit ur parents and u want a divorce?...tel us more. Moreover, be nice to d kids, bond with them. Provide opportunity for them to speak with Granny on fone . When they grow, they will surely look for Granny, she can't stop them.

Kilode! So granny should wait until they grow up? What if she dies before then or don't you know that granny enjoys them better as kids so she can carry them on her laps.

Me wonder if a bot actually wrote this o.

Baby mama:

Gosh
I couldn't help it


How many times have you told her to her face how you married her to take the shame of pregnancy off her
With the the way you are carrying on here,I bet the woman gets that sorry line every solitary moment
Besides the other selfish reason about populating your father's compound
Nonsense!
You regret having a second child with her?,infact you hate having a second child
What father says that about their own child/children?
She is a torn in your flesh
What a wuss
You regret the first child,you regret the second,you regret your marriage
Your whole life is full of regrets,when will you grow up and be a man?
What a zero

The Bible says a man shall leave his father and mother and cleave to his wife
You haven't read that part abi?
Read that first post,it's all about your parents
Where does this woman come in right in this marriage of yours
You married her because she was carrying a child that will be like a second child to your parents
You hate her yet she birthed yet another child
Now you and your parents want to turn her into a mere uterus ,baby making machine since you can wake up and make decisions regarding the children she carried 9 months a piece sotay your parents will waka from their abode to come and take the kids
You do have a nerve don't you?
You are lucky it was just your torn clothes,some mothers would have attacked both you and your parents and NTA will come and snap foto

Do you want real truth or you want some small boys advising you
Retrace your steps
If you divorce this woman and keep the same parents and same mindset,I promise you,you will divorce again unless the next wife is barren and or jobless.
If you doubt me try it

I wish the woman will even wake up and divorce you when she gets wind of exactly what you think of the union
She is a medical doctor you say,she can do without your immature self

I love this! Op sounded like a kid that is being controlled by his parent. He is not ripe for marriage.
Sometimes when my parent want to act funny I take action that seem rude to my parent but I know within me I'm doing something right. They have lived their lives they should allow me to live mine. All I need is their prayer not physical interference.
The parents of the op are acting funny because op is the only son.

Your case is not far from what many men are experiencing these days. Men are now managing their wives and are no more marrying them. About 50% of men are regretting ever marrying the woman they married, 30% are seriously suing for divorce while only 10-20% are enjoying their marital lives. The reason is that men are no more looking out for the inner qualities of a woman but rather the outward qualities. Is she tall & beautiful? Is she fair complexioned? Is she a graduate or about to graduate? Is she a working class? Is she from a buoyant family? and so on. My advice to my fellow men is that when they are looking out for a lady to marry, they should focus their attention & look out for a lady that is honest, somebody that will respect not only you but your family members and friends; a lady that knows how to cook b/c the easiest way to a man's heart is good food; a lady that is careful, neat and ordery since your home is d mirrow of who u are; a lady that knows how to pray b/c the family that prays 2geda, stays 2geda and u know sometimes men finds it very difficult to pray; a lady u'll wish to be seeing every day without getting bored; a lady that knows how to manage when things are hard; a lady that has sth in her brain who can comfortably manage the home in ur absence etc. Therefore, my advice to you is that u shld wake her up one mid- night & try to tell her how much u love her & how her behaviour is trying to ruin their marriage, assure her of ur love & forgiveness and remember to carry ur request to God in prayers. Good luck!

immortalvoices: Sorry sir for the domestic marital problem...

Op the truth is dat she is seriously tired of the marriage, and she is using the wild behaviours of her to frustrate you...

My take... Maybe she thinks you ruin her life by getting her pregnant early and she is actually regretting us as a husband to her

SOLUTION...look for someone she respect tell that person to advice her, apologize to her and show her more love...never fight her in return and above all Go to God in prayer

It is well.



I HEAR VOICES....

Dis is out of it....ao do u mean ? Waz she raped? It takes 2 to tangle na.....na wha 4 dis kind advice o

opetu:

hum..dere waz quite a gud level of respect tho, it was all good! shez good wit her family expecially wiv her mom, sumtyms i do think its her mom dat giv her dose ill advices! yup d kids go to her mom, couple of time durin holidays, most times her mom come stays wit us!!

But when it comes mine, its epic quarell..even when dey come stay she frowns a lot! i knw sum kids stay with their grand parents till maybe secondary skul, i wanted that but i cnt ve dat talk less of just an holiday visit. hired a lawyer already incase of divorce.. which happens to be our landlord tnx to him d marriage ve been able to hold for dis years Of course i dnt wanna be a divorcee

What's her parents comments on this issue especially her father? If they are all in support of her then you have a lot to do.....are u performing ur responsibilities the way it suppose to be...e.g. House rent, children skool fees, feeding, her allowances, settling her parents / families accordingly etc.....also have u sat her down and seek her mind over this? Hope she did not catch u with any girl?....who are her friends? Has she for ones had issue with ur parents (ur mom) ? Guy if you are not guilty of dis I will advise you to take ur stand and stop all her families / friends from coming to your house (if truely u are d one paying ur house rent o) but if na your wife or inlaw, na now ur calamity start o...........also let her know that she is d one dragging the marriage to grave and she will be d loser at d end.........caution ursef and don't let another child come forth for now......U are not happy and ur parents are sad cos of ur wife, let her know that she is sowing a seed and by the time fruit will be mature, she will regret it o.

The story is one sided

However the premise that no woman sets out to frustrate her in laws deliberately is not always true

apache77:
u r in trouble bro...kick her asz out....you are not being firm..
my wife, wen we were dating was very refractive- as in very stubborn. i could come to see her and she will tell me get out- boota- it was dat bad. One night wen we had issues, and i was trying to stop her from stomping away in anger, she slapped me. I just held her and didnt even vex. she later put it down to being tipsy. i forgot the issue and just hung in der, swallowing all the shitt she handed down for years.....
till one fateful night in 2009 wen she misbehaved, while we were out.

I descended on her so brutally while a friend was driving us back home, she opened the door of the fast moving car to jump down- it would hav been manslaughter.We had to stop, i beat the hell out of her she crawled under the car and more than two dozen cars had to crowd round us cos people following thought it was a kidnap attempt. That was five years ago.

But since that day, the lose screw in her head tightened back and she has been very pliable, very amenable now. We are married now and no issues- she is the most humble wife you can think of- and i dont threaten her or try to lord over her- no. Just a loving relationship, but she has it at the back of her mind, this her husband can be a beast if he decides to.

She initially never liked my own friends and people around me- just her own people and friends- but now the tide has changed- its more my people around us now and my friends and no one complains- she always has a nice demeanour towards everyone. Matter of fact, as I speak, she is not just in family home, two cities away, but has even followed my mum to our village home- they have a great relationsnhip and I am happy.

This was a very very refractive woman who made our relationship hell- of all of us who dated it was difficult for any one man to get a handle on her, but I have tamed her and we have a wonderful relationship. Infact, right now, she is the one putting in all the effort to make the marriage work while I just cross my legs and watch her in amusement.

I think the single most decisive moment in our relationship was that fateful night 3years into our relationship when i beat the hell out of her- that singular moment turned the tables and told her i was firmly in charge.

You may need your own decisive moment too, to save your marriage...and your sanity, if its not too late already

THE ONLY SENSIBLE COMMENT. @OP KICK HER ASS OUT AND DO A SIM REPLACEMENT, SORRY WIFE

slightlyMad:
Why u dey use paracetamol for another woman's headache?
was she beaten or forced to say "i do" later on at the alter?
the problem with the OP is that he has not yet proven to be man.

See how you get things twisted. This case is not about acting out outdated inaccurate stereotypes as to what it takes to be a man, as if it is a Nollywood movie.
The issue is really a very specific problem that is threatening to tear the home apart. Namely the security and custody of the children. The solution is communication.
I suppose that the OP has very unwisely acted like a dictator and taken steps with regards the kids without discussion and consent of the wife carelessly thinking that she would go along with whatever he decides. It doesn't work like that in such a charged sensitive matter.
This is precisely the time for the OP to apply tact, wisdom and discretion as opposed to using caveman tactics.

my advice is that you have to be in charge of your game! you have to be man enough!

Kirinwa:
Kilode! So granny should wait until they grow up? What if she dies before then or don't you know that granny enjoys them better as kids so she can carry them on her laps.
Me wonder if a bot actually wrote this o.

Your words betray that you are still a kid. Is it compulsory to comment?

apache77:
u r in trouble bro...kick her asz out....you are not being firm..
my wife, wen we were dating was very refractive- as in very stubborn. i could come to see her and she will tell me get out- boota- it was dat bad. One night wen we had issues, and i was trying to stop her from stomping away in anger, she slapped me. I just held her and didnt even vex. she later put it down to being tipsy. i forgot the issue and just hung in der, swallowing all the shitt she handed down for years.....
till one fateful night in 2009 wen she misbehaved, while we were out.

I descended on her so brutally while a friend was driving us back home, she opened the door of the fast moving car to jump down- it would hav been manslaughter.We had to stop, i beat the hell out of her she crawled under the car and more than two dozen cars had to crowd round us cos people following thought it was a kidnap attempt. That was five years ago.

But since that day, the lose screw in her head tightened back and she has been very pliable, very amenable now. We are married now and no issues- she is the most humble wife you can think of- and i dont threaten her or try to lord over her- no. Just a loving relationship, but she has it at the back of her mind, this her husband can be a beast if he decides to.

She initially never liked my own friends and people around me- just her own people and friends- but now the tide has changed- its more my people around us now and my friends and no one complains- she always has a nice demeanour towards everyone. Matter of fact, as I speak, she is not just in family home, two cities away, but has even followed my mum to our village home- they have a great relationsnhip and I am happy.

This was a very very refractive woman who made our relationship hell- of all of us who dated it was difficult for any one man to get a handle on her, but I have tamed her and we have a wonderful relationship. Infact, right now, she is the one putting in all the effort to make the marriage work while I just cross my legs and watch her in amusement.

I think the single most decisive moment in our relationship was that fateful night 3years into our relationship when i beat the hell out of her- that singular moment turned the tables and told her i was firmly in charge.

You may need your own decisive moment too, to save your marriage...and your sanity, if its not too late already

WOW! *claps*

Baby mama:

Gosh
I couldn't help it


How many times have you told her to her face how you married her to take the shame of pregnancy off her
With the the way you are carrying on here,I bet the woman gets that sorry line every solitary moment
Besides the other selfish reason about populating your father's compound
Nonsense!
You regret having a second child with her?,infact you hate having a second child
What father says that about their own child/children?
She is a torn in your flesh
What a wuss
You regret the first child,you regret the second,you regret your marriage
Your whole life is full of regrets,when will you grow up and be a man?
What a zero

The Bible says a man shall leave his father and mother and cleave to his wife
You haven't read that part abi?
Read that first post,it's all about your parents
Where does this woman come in right in this marriage of yours
You married her because she was carrying a child that will be like a second child to your parents
You hate her yet she birthed yet another child
Now you and your parents want to turn her into a mere uterus ,baby making machine since you can wake up and make decisions regarding the children she carried 9 months a piece sotay your parents will waka from their abode to come and take the kids
You do have a nerve don't you?
You are lucky it was just your torn clothes,some mothers would have attacked both you and your parents and NTA will come and snap foto

Do you want real truth or you want some small boys advising you
Retrace your steps
If you divorce this woman and keep the same parents and same mindset,I promise you,you will divorce again unless the next wife is barren and or jobless.
If you doubt me try it

I wish the woman will even wake up and divorce you when she gets wind of exactly what you think of the union
She is a medical doctor you say,she can do without your immature self

God bless you. You said a lot I didn't even notice. The parts of his post you highlighted are worse than what he claims the wife does.
It seems the whole thing was about raising kids for his parents to compensate them for having only one child.
I am not here to victimize the Op, but like my parents taught me, the op has to look to himself where he missed it, if he adjust, he'll be amazed how that same wife may become an angel!

Abbey2sam: Fast n pray bro

Must fast and pray be solution to every problem? This requires common sense. This op did not tell us so many things
1. What was his mother's relationship with the wife's like at the beginning of their marriage and up till date. Cos from experience, if the two of them go hand in hand from pregnancy stage, there won't be issue with the child.

2. Do you relate with her parents and siblings well

I sensed you don't know your woman enough before marrying her but dat you can correct. Most of the people here are not married. Almost every woman misbehaves like wise us the man but seeing us as the head we think we are above the law.


Do you know the implications of divorce on children? And the other sister you are considering, how do you know what her behavior will be? Marriage na one chance, anything you meet in it take it that way.


Maybe your mum was even packaging another woman before for you before you go colobi this one, she knows about it and now reacting (just joking)

You can travel with your kids to see your parents, if she agreed to go with you fine and if she is feeling uncomfortable, go alone with your kids and if possible leave them there for a while. She can't go to your father's house and start causing problems there cos she is out of her territory.

Lastly, remember you paid her dowry so you should be in charge. You don't need permission to do everything. Even if she contributes to the welfare of the house more than you

But seriously from the comments of some ladies here, i wonder why they always think you should love and trust them authomatically above everyone else the moment they step into your life. As if men fell from the sky or Did they always forget that you were once loved and cared for by someone else before they came? Its a silly and unintelligent way of thinking. No true mother would entrust her son to a lady just like that only because they wedded after six months of courtship. Its not the mothers fault but the way ladies of our time places money above everything, we have seen married women with kids and stiill without conscience. I implore nigerian ladies to understand this hard facts and know that even though trust is a sign of love, trust is entirely different from love and it takes time to attain trust in a family you cant even die for. As for us, if she must earn our trust, my wife must appreciate what and who made me who i am just as i must appriciate hers.

Hehehehehe... Churchy gurl gone evillll... Joking apart now.
Impregnating a lady doesn't AUTOmatically makes you her hubby-to-be... It only makes you an 'AUTOmatic' father of that child.. Many are oblivious of this very fact... Like...uhmmmm.. Mehn! I need to save to get an AUTO- a ride..

I want to know where your wife is from, I have some how come to realize that most of the women from the south don't respect their husbands--mind you before somebody misquotes me I said not all. They always want to take laws into their hands sometimes if you are not careful they may even beat you up, especially now that we have been seeing head lines of women using kitchen knives to cutoff the manhoods of their husbands. Women of these last days honestly are getting really weird I know that I'm 22yr and am not married but I cannot give a phantomable report of the woman that is in our house now because that now na fire.

"If the foundation be destroyed what can the righteous do?"

@ op U met a girl in a school fellowship (she claim to be a "sister" n u guys were sleeping with each other, what do u expect from a pretender?

Johnnycife: I want to know where your wife is from, I have some how come to realize that most of the women from the south don't respect their husbands--mind you before somebody misquotes me I said not all. They always want to take laws into their hands sometimes if you are not careful they may even beat you up, especially now that we have been seeing head lines of women using kitchen knives to cutoff the manhoods of their husbands. Women of these last days honestly are getting really weird I know that I'm 22yr and am not married but I cannot give a phantomable report of the woman that is in our house now because that now na fire.

Johnny Jony SHUT UP. If you are just 22 years old bachelor to boot why start generalising. Respect is a two-way street and in this scenario the OP selfish actions and self-indulgent attitude have led to his marital probems.

Pastor Olu T: "If the foundation be destroyed what can the righteous do?"

@ op U met a girl in a school fellowship (she claim to be a "sister" n u guys were sleeping with each other, what do u expect from a pretender?

Don't judge. What God has joined together let no man put asunder. You really are kidding yourself if you think that the wife would have gone along with his plans to send the kids from to MIL if they had not had premarital sex. He is just bringing that up to spite the woman as if he were not the one that initiated the act.
Maybe he even went to the fellowship specifically to look for a wife rather than because he is a "brother". His words and actions betray that he has never been one.

tensor77:
Johnny Jony SHUT UP. If you are just 22 years old bachelor to boot why start generalising. Respect is a two-way street and in this scenario the OP selfish actions and self-indulgent attitude have led to his marital probems.

thanks for shutting me up I hope you'll not very soon end up opening a thread like this requesting for people's advices we have made mistakes besides you don't know a woman by the kind of religion he tends to put on- note that her character reveals with the proceeds of time.

Johnnycife:
thanks for shutting me up I hope you'll not very soon end up opening a thread like this requesting for people's advices we have made mistakes besides you don't know a woman by the kind of religion he tends to put on- note that her character reveals with the proceeds of time.

Its just that I detest people generalising when it comes to very specific circumstances like this. The Bible says by their fruits we shall know them. By the OP'S posts on this thread it is pretty clear the kind of person he is and why his spouse has reacted the way she has. Well he has been given good advice as well as some clearly twisted mule-headed utterances.
Its up to him to choose which ones to follow.

Ya. This some how saddening. My elder brothers wife insults him my mum n even my late Dad when it got to my Dad I faced her n told her never in her life to insult my Dad our Father n Hero. The devil disturbing u should pack well when it comes to my father. My elder brother gave her d beating of her life into submission. I knw him to be d quiet type n none violent but dis tym he dealt wit her n senses came to her head. I am nt advocating wife beating but truly some women are nt wives but knives. Bro let God help u oh cos dis a fire dt has to be quench take ur stand but not divorce. Grace.

Blue Scholar: Always remember that your parents comes first,if she can't learn to love them then you have to man up and divorce her...
Will you like the wife of your son treat you like sh*t?

Stop this. Your parents can NEVER come first. Every living thing grows and ages. You are growing older not younger. Be wise, consider your future and work on it.