₦airaland Forum

frozen70:
You love her more and she knows that

She loves you but doesn't respect your relationship with her

Now my question to you is, how prepared is this lady for which ever level you are taking this relationship too

Or because her mom loves you, do she will be the one to oil the relationship

I think you should ghost her let's see if she will search or get worried about you not communicating with her

She said you should feed your eys on her messages, well be prepared to see more things that will turn you off

Her mom does not love op trust me. If the mom knew about her cheating, will she tell the OP?

josephm456:
I don’t know what that love and light means though.

Bless your heart 😂

She cheated. You already know what to do.

Team foreign women!!

seanwilliam:
lol , even bad men have there good sides.

Bad women have their good side too. Using your logic

Klass99:
Let me give you their typical answer/response to the text in bold - if it is not easy then enter plane and come back na. I am sure you have seen this countless times on front page

There's an erroneous belief in their hearts that anyone trying to educate, inform or caution them about japa is an enemy of progress, a bad belle or envious person, who doesn't want others to benefit the good things obodo has in store.

I have heard all kinds of reasons for japa relocation that I don't bother to debate or argue with. Even when you point them to personal stories and accounts of life overseas by African diasporans (not Nigerian diasporans alone but other Africans) they will still fight and curse. The behaviour is very unreasonable like you said.

One love to old school music. So you are also in this UK, Sukkot keeps demystifying for us? Seeing as you know rental prices in Sunderland, Manny & Birmingham.

Yep! 🤣 "if it's not so easy then come back", they love to say. But alot of people in cities in Nigeria moved there from elsewhere and they themselves don't just run back to where they came from either when they face challenges. They try to make it work. Yet they dish that advise freely to people abroad.

At the same time if you tell them how good things have been for you and how you've gone from milestone to milestone. Don't think that helps either. They still accuse you of living a fake life and trying to oppress them 🤣

Yep I am. Where are you?

seanwilliam:
Hmm sorry ehn, God will bring person wey go stay .

But it’s EXTREMELY rare for a man to dump a supportive and valuable woman . Even if he does that , he’ll do something you’ll always remember him for.

Number of years you spend with a man doesn’t matter to him , your impact does. You dey calculate the years, him dey calculate your contribution and usefulness to his future.

There is more to this story , it’s very hard for a woman to agree she’s wrong after breakup but let’s pretend you’re saying the truth .

Why is it rare? Do bad men not exist?

The same way bad women that hurt good men exist.

huptin:
Why is it that most of this so called celebrities lost their virginity to rape? Is rape now a criteria for being a celebrity? They are all liars!

I tire o. But seriously, they should stop protecting the alleged rapist.

huptin:
This is one of the commonest lies amongst ladies...if every one of you lost their virginity through rape and most men will say they have never raped a lady before so who is doing the raping?

I'm not saying those women are telling the truth.

But where have you ever seen a rapist confess to you he is one?

Ray07:
At least the money is use for the betterment of the country. Unlike like the hell call Nigeria, where one person go carry the whole money go do dorime for Dubai.

Them say we no wan pay tax . . . To fix one basic amenities na world war for Nigeria gov. They expect people to pay tax hell we go through daily to make money.

Nigerians are also the problem of Nigeria.

You guys contribute money to build lavish churches but you don't contribute money to build good roads or even a small clinic.

It's all about priorities.

Stop calling "government" they have already shown you that they don't care about you.

sukkot:
alright let's do the math on your lying friend. 10 pounds per hour at 40 hours a week is 1600 a month. Tax will leave him with 1200 a month . Rent in Sunderland maybe 500 a month he has 700 left. Utilities like 300. He has 400 left. Council tax 150. He has 250 left. Phone and internet. 100. He has 150 left.

I haven't added feeding and this your friend has only 150 left. I put it to you that your friend does not even make enough to feed himself or get a haircut or buy clothes. He will be one of those Nigerians over there who go to Salvation Army charity or church charity to get free food because they can't feed tbemself. Almost 40 percent of Nigerians in the UK cannot afford food. If you go to the charity section of every church where they give free food to the hungry it's full of Nigerian families.

😂

It's Sunderland, not Manchester or Birmingham.

I know rent in manny is £500 for a studio. Now in Sunderland it should be even less.

Treadway:
lol. Very hilarious submission. Bob Marley's grandson died of asthma. I used that example as it is a known person. There is even a trend with a hashtag 'died suddenly' of an uptick in the number of young people suddenly dropping dead in public eg at the gym etc...and conspiracy theorist are even trying to tie it to the covid vaccine ( which could have some merit actually) BUT according to you people don't die overseas.

Funny peeps full here I swear.🤣

These things are rare, that's why people are making a deal of it.
But in Nigeria, people die needlessly.
Diseases that don't kill anymore are still killing 3rd worlders.

Eg did you know abortions are actually a very safe procedure?

Klass99:
This is the part that bothers me the most about this japa movement, why sell off the house too? That is solid shelter right there for the rest of your life, yet we give it up for rented shelter, shared spaces, cramped houses, in middle age or old age when we should be working towards a retirement.

What are we doing to ourselves as a people? Can they not leave the houses alone as a fall back plan, holiday home or rental property? My bad, that's where the bulk of the exorbitant relocation fees actually comes from, I don't even know what I am saying sef . Mary J. Blige be confusing me this morning with her real love track, old school music rocks!

Lol everything had to go because they thought
they could do better. The ppl already in the West tried to tell them it's not so easy abroad, but they dismissed them as wanting to stop their progress.

How can Nigerians abroad tell you its not a bed of roses and you dismiss them as if they just lied to you? Nigerians are just unreasonable.

The new wave of japarians performed poorly compared to Nigerians of 20-50 years ago.
Maybe because most of them came with nothing and some still have nothing but that softens the blow.

The new wave say they're doing it for their kids, but it's just their greed.
If they were bothered about their kids, they would have left many years before they even had kids to properly plan.

Love old school music aswell 🙌🏾

emmaodet:
But something else would have killed him.
Are people not dying in abroad again?

Ofcourse they do. But a seizure doesn't typically kill people.

Klass99:
Some japa stories intrigue me because they are done by people who were doing reasonably well in Naija and not suffering at all. They never let you in on their plans but once they get there, you start receiving text messages about their relocation and texts soliciting prayers for their success in the new land.

I don't have a problem with being left in the dark about their relocation plans or praying for them, but don't try to turn me into a prayer warrior on top of your issues. One friend is in the habit of constantly badgering you about prayers, in the course of a conversation she will say stuff like - that is one more thing you should be praying for, for me, as if you owe her a duty of prayers.

Another whose hubby worked as a senior manager in a good firm and she in a federal agency, with a thriving cake business on the side japa-ed too. She took a leave of absence at work but is actively job searching in the UK now. When she mentioned the leave of absence, I asked her, do you honestly think your hubby will let you return to that job and leave him with 3 kids in the UK? You better concentrate on your new life there and finding a job because your old life as you knew it is over.

And boy was her cake business good, she even diversified into pastries, small chops and a bit of chinese cuisine. The things we give up for this japa dream ehn, I hope and pray it all works out for good. I read online that in our quest for something better we don't take the time to enjoy the good things we have anymore, we are always fixated on something better.

Their stories are truly intriguing. This japa movement has really ruined relationships between Nigerians. Couples breaking up, thinking they can do better than each other, friends becoming enemies. I just listen to them and see how unreasonable and paranoid Nigerians can be.

They don't let people in on their plans because they fear evil eye. But if you don't trust friends, why have them around you and then turn around to expect well wishes?

People who were comfortable in Nigeria with multiple houses and cars, got rid of it all, just for greed.
As the saying goes if it ain't broke don't fix it.

But then what happened with Yul Edochie's son made me rethink a little. The rich in Nigeria still feel insecurity. If Yul's son was in a developed country, a seizure won't have killed him.

Has she got a condition? She looks microcephalic

MrBrownJay1:
of course!!!! a beggar cant be a chooser... you take what comes along. but its well known that a fugly baby whale will accept faster than Beyonce lookalike.



you are partly right here...
A) YES, these men solely marry who they "can", not who they desire. after they get their permanent residency, thats when they go for who they desire (thus when many go back home to find a wife)
B) NO, these desperate men need to say any rubbish to get these women to marry them... so they make these women believe that this is the real deal in order for the gullible woman to fall in love and marry them asap (some even have children with these women).
C) people who marry for convenience often have to pay the american spouse for that service (between $10k to $30K or more).



how can such man be naive if/when he doesnt find the type of character he desires in a wife at home, and therefore decide to go abroad to find such wife?! to each their own. right? back when i was living inBrasil, i remember so many of them coming to Rio because , as they said, Brasilian women treated their men in a traditional manner and took better care of their men, while not trying to compete as the head of the family (like many women do in the western world). the catch is that many of these passport bros find these wives abroad and keep them there...unlike the US immigrants who bring their village back to the US.



isnt it the same wealth that women in the west today often value men upon and/or when these women have wealth themselves, they will be quick to say they dont need a man? lets be honest, if men pay for everything, shouldnt they be treated like a king at home (like these foreign women treat them abroad)? the funny part is that many of these passport bros dont even have much money, they just have a passport and a job... but just with that, they are treated better abroad by foreign women.

And the wives don't bother them to take them back to the West?

If the man told them on approach that he doesn't intend in anyway to go back to the West, I'm pretty sure the women still agreed in the hope that one day he'll change his mind lol

olatunjiii:
You dey tried seriously

Why did you quote that person? You're one and the same.
Seun, lalasticlala, 0AM4J

"fvck around, find out"

CodeTemplar:
money is encountered / attracted, and does not rain.

So you believe it works?

CodeTemplar:
Money ritual is and isn't a scam.
It is because it kills to give money, yet isn't because it is real.

No money comes out, so the victims died in vain.

Nollwyood aswell. I talk am here

https://www.nairaland.com/7639750/nigerians-good-witchcraft-because-make

Gmajor:
Who told you that dollar is about to loose value?

It looses value each day. Lol.

When you tell Africans your travails and struggles abroad, they say you want to discourage them and others.

When you tell them you're living large and balling, they say you're living a fake life and just want to oppress them.

You can't win.

FalseProphet1:
It can get you good designer clothes, shoes and perfume. So you will at least look good.

This I have seen.

Buying designer clothes in Nigeria? Yikes.

MrBrownJay1:
these men desire ANY women, whether fat, old, ugly or challenged... because their aim is not to find the love of their lives, their aim is to get a green card. so i can assure you that they can easily find plenty of women out there to marry (unless you believe that all single women in the US are beautiful/fit/intelligent). there are many women out there that US men dont look at, let alone approach, thus these immigrants would be the jackpot to many of these women (aka immigrants who treat them like they look like Beyonce). every time you hear of a US grandma marrying a younger dude, he is 90% of the time an immigrant from Africa/latin America, Asia or Eastern Europe). these are the same women who go to Jamaica to get their "groove on". lets be honest here.



there is a reason why a great deal of American black men today aka "passport bros" would rather go abroad (dominican rep, Colombia, Brasil, Thailand, Philippines or simply back to Africa) to find a good wife... and therefore, many black american women may feel left out (aka the pool of eligible bachelors gets limited) thus why i fully understand why many of these now desperate women go the "immigrant" route to find a man...

Those women aren't their first choice are they ? They go to undesirable women because they know they'll jump at the attention.
That's not who they truly want. It's a marraige of convenience. As long as both parties are aware, I actually have no issue with it.

The passport bros sound naive. Most Americans don't know beyond their nose. I feel its safer to approach non westerned women where they are already are.

Before they get targeted in a foreign country for their percieved wealth

PoliteActivist:
@bolded, see below how the post was shifted. I didn't shift it



As for the rest of your post, so you know better than 1Sharon who was born in US?? She's telling you how they come accross to a US-born, and you are telling her what's in your head!
As for majority of immigrants eventually finding women to date and even marry. The question was never finding ANY woman. You could find a chain-smoking drug addict or prostitute. The question is what caliber of women are available to them!

Lol..I was actually born in the UK but I know how it is on the other side

MrBrownJay1:
the majority of immigrants eventually do find women to date and even marry... let us not pretend that most Immigrants (whether legal or otherwise) dont find women in the US.

as for you claiming that most "new" Immigrants are desperate and/or have bad attitude, i beg to differ. they are different than Americans, yes, but thats about it. majority of immigrants in the US are law abiding upstanding individuals. IMHO the reason why many US born Nigerians look down on these "new" immigrants is partly to do because they feel they are better than them.

as for Politeactivist who took the OP's original post about finding any baby whale to marry in the US (for a green card), and now shifted the whole subject to finding HIGH VALUE WOMEN to marry in the US, i laugh in Korean!

Some are just not on the same wavelength of the women they desire. This includes, black, white, Asian women.

They come still fresh with their unsophisticati devious of critical thinking sprinkled with religious hypocrisy. The ways some of them express themselves reveals their lack of exposure. They don't understand western social cues either because they haven't been around long enough
A woman smiles at them and they immediately jump and approach. They dont understand smiling Is just a sign of friendliness.

As I said before, everybody in life eventually gets in where they fit in.

Albertone:
We have a lot of men who possess these qualities but are tired of Nigeria so, they hustle for green card too.

Being in the categories listed and hustling for green card are not mutually exclusive.

Actor Bolanle Ninalowo met these criteria but still hustled for green card, so did 9ice, the singer.

Did they deceive old women to marry?

I used to be so good at it. But there's no point teaching it since its obsolete

Albertone:
They would pick him because he is a man in good shape, smart, responsible and successful.

Below are the only reasons they wouldn't pick him:
1. If he doesn't possess the qualities listed above.
2. If they are lesbians.
3. If they suspect he is only with them for papers.
4. If they don't do black men(not necessarily racism).

The OP is a desperate man hustling for green card, pls explain how he can possibly meet the categories youve listed above?

The men are no different. Most Nigerians don't work out