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How Do I Dump My Girlfriend Without Hurting Her? - Romance (4) - Nairaland

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Re: How Do I Dump My Girlfriend Without Hurting Her? by Amhappy(f): 10:59am On Dec 07
ponti93:
No matter how much it hurts.. . A broken relationship is better than a broken marriage... As for those talking about sex... Sex in a relationship is nt meant to be a bargain... Its smetin enjoyed by both... Nobody used each other... You don't expect him to not have sex until he has learned everything about her then decide that she is the one for marriage... Relationships are meant to be a journey from day one you learn... As it goes you get to know if you are staying forever or not.

Sorry to quote you. Sex is not supposed to be engaged in without commitment. What you said is because we are disobedient children. Our Father mandated sex to be within marriage. The main reason OP is feeling guilty is because he has joined his body to that of this lady and I tell you that's why the lady will also feel bad when she hears op. Relationship can exist without sex.

3 Likes

Re: How Do I Dump My Girlfriend Without Hurting Her? by nelklyn(m): 10:59am On Dec 07
lilbest4:
there's nothing special about her pants actually they both enjoyed it

This is the part most ladies have refused to come to terms with.
S3x is something enjoyed by both men and women...why will anyone act like there was any sacrifice made.

Back to the topic @op tell her how you feel...it's as simple as that. If she gets hurt, time will heal her.

2 Likes

Re: How Do I Dump My Girlfriend Without Hurting Her? by Youngzubi(m): 10:59am On Dec 07
Nairaland is not the best place to seek for advise on this issue, i'm not trying to say nairaland isn't a good forum to share problems but i do tell you that you won't be getting anything suiting at all. Some will frustrate you while the remaining will keep on quoting anyone who tries to criticize your mistakes. Yes, you actually made a mistake sir,according to what you wrote up there i guess you're a mature man holding to the fact that you already had a wife and a kid before, remember this if you're a Christian, since your wife is not dead anything you do with any other lady both sexually is a sin and unacceptable before the lord, you can't even marry that your so called girlfriend because you already had a wife no matter what the level of misunderstanding between you and your wife might be she is still the one heaven recognize as your partner, So bro i will advise you to talk to that lady you had sex with, apologize to her and make her understand that you guys ain't meant for each other, she might feel heartbroken but the right thing must be done by taking the right steps, don't just end things with her roughly or casually cos she's a human and blood also flows through her vein but anything you do with her sexually is a "SIN" because you have a wife.

So sir do go back and reconcile with your wife after you must have end things with that your woman friend and please don't have sex or anything sexual with her again since its clear to you now that it can't work out between you two.

My opinion tho.

5 Likes 2 Shares

Re: How Do I Dump My Girlfriend Without Hurting Her? by darkelf: 10:59am On Dec 07
samguru:
For mature minds only.

I need your advice on how to dumb a lady which I don't like but we have been dating in the last 5 months.
She was introduced to me by a friend and since then I thought the relationship can lead to marriage but my instinct keeps telling she is not the one.

I have had sex with her anyway but her antecedents is something to worry about as she has been married and the marriage crashed without a child.

I have also married with a male child but the marriage crashed due to crazy intolerable behaviours of my ex.
This lady has shown some signs which my ex possessed and I don't want to experience such marriage again.

Please how do I dump her without having any feeling of guilt.

Please feminists should keep off this thread.

As a male, I owe it to you to be truthful.

It was wrong of you to sleep without knowing her well. Imagine sleeping with someone and then going back on a decision after discovering things about them you don't like. If it were your sister, would you be happy?

You shouldn't be one to judge her based on her last failed marriage. Yours also failed too and I'm sure your ex would also blame you for the failed marriage (we have not heard for ex's side of thr story on why your former marriage failed).It takes two to tango remember?
The fact that you are asking the bolded question means that in all honesty, there is no way you can dump her without feeling guilty and you know it deep within you.

5 Likes 1 Share

Re: How Do I Dump My Girlfriend Without Hurting Her? by denitro(m): 11:01am On Dec 07
How do you fry egg without cracking the egg open?
Re: How Do I Dump My Girlfriend Without Hurting Her? by hizzypearl(f): 11:02am On Dec 07
Good Morning Sir,
I Won't Criticize You Because You Have Sex With Her, This Thing Is An Agreement Between You Both, You Din't Force Her Or Did You? You Both Enjoyed It Or Maybe You Didn't, I Don't Know.
If She's An Understanding Person, Call Her, Say Your Mind, Its Better Than Wasting Her Time And Its Also Better Than Marrying Her Out Of Pity Cos You Definitely Gonna Regret It.. Not Every Relationship Lead To Marriage.
There Is No How You Will Breakup With Her Without Her Getting Hurt. Yes She's Gonna Get Hurt, Especially Because Of What She Has Gone Through, But With Time, She's Gonna Heal. Yes, She's Gonna Be Fine.. And Don't Feel Guilty Because Of That, Do What Is Best For You Please.. May God Sort You Guys.

1 Like

Re: How Do I Dump My Girlfriend Without Hurting Her? by tosyne2much(m): 11:04am On Dec 07
BafanaBafana:
I let a lady like that go some weeks ago. Very nice and pretty. But she had some traits which I have seen and don't like in women. She is still hurting but she will be fine. I miss her too.
I told she is nice and the prettiest girl I ever dated but I am not convinced she is the one for me to marry because I loose my peace whenever I think of settling down with her. So it's best I let her go now so I don't end up breaking her heart later, which will be more difficult for her to bear.
Bro, what's even the essence of marrying someone that will not give you peace?

Most times, it isn't all about "love"

1 Like

Re: How Do I Dump My Girlfriend Without Hurting Her? by malel1: 11:04am On Dec 07
Youngzubi:
Nairaland is not the best place to seek for advise on this issue, i'm not trying to say nairaland isn't a good forum to share problems but i do tell you that you won't be getting anything suiting at all. Some will frustrate you while the remaining will keep on quoting anyone who tries to criticize your mistakes. Yes, you actually made a mistake sir,according to what you wrote up there i guess you're a mature man holding to the fact that you already had a wife and a kid before, remember this if you're a Christian, since your wife is not dead anything you do with any other lady both sexually is a sin and unacceptable before the lord, you can't even marry that your so called girlfriend because you already had a wife no matter what the level of misunderstanding between you and your wife might be she is still the one heaven recognize as your partner, So bro i will advise you to talk to that lady you had sex with, apologize to her and make her understand that you guys ain't meant for each other, she might feel heartbroken but the right thing must be done by taking the right steps, don't just end things with her roughly or casually cos she's a human and blood also flows through her vein but anything you do with her sexually is a "SIN" because you have a wife.

So sir do go back and reconcile with your wife after you must have end things with that your woman friend and please don't have sex or anything sexual with her again since its clear to you now that it can't work out between you two.

My opinion tho.


Thank God will still have some reasonable people in Nigeria
Re: How Do I Dump My Girlfriend Without Hurting Her? by ponti93(m): 11:06am On Dec 07
Amhappy:


Sorry to quote you. Sex is not supposed to be engaged in without commitment. What you said is because we are disobedient children. Our Father mandated sex to be within marriage. The main reason OP is feeling guilty is because he has joined his body to that of this lady and I tell you that's why the lady will also feel bad when she hears op. Relationship can exist without sex.
are you saying that their are no relationships that were started and ended without sex... Of course there are... And i can tell you one or both partners still hurt over it... I hav such experience
Re: How Do I Dump My Girlfriend Without Hurting Her? by Amhappy(f): 11:06am On Dec 07
Youngzubi:
, you can't even marry that your so called girlfriend because you already had a wife no matter what the level of misunderstanding between you and your wife might be she is still the one heaven recognize as your partner,
So sir do go back and reconcile with your wife after you must have end things with that your woman friend and please don't have sex or anything sexual with her again since its clear to you now that it can't work out between you two.

My opinion tho.

So true.
Re: How Do I Dump My Girlfriend Without Hurting Her? by ImaIma1(f): 11:07am On Dec 07
pepigeorge:


Who said when u sleep with a woman.. U must stick with her...
Grow up, this 21st century.. Women dish out sex like biscuits these days... There's is nothing sacred about it
.

Get the message. Don't add your meaning to it.

The point is "why go deep when you know you don't intend to stay?"

1 Like

Re: How Do I Dump My Girlfriend Without Hurting Her? by PraiZ15: 11:07am On Dec 07
Below are the things foolish guys tell ladies in order to dump them without hurting their feeling
1."My parents(especially my mother) went to pray abt it and a prophet told her d marriage will be dangerous if we get married"
2. "My pastor saw a vision that our marriage will hit the rock after 3 Years of marriageable"
3. "I went to do my genotype from 3 different labs last week and I was told dat I'm As"(if the lady is As genotype and they believe she will let go easily becos she does not want to gv birth to a sickle cell child)
NB:whatever a man sows, that he will reap.

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: How Do I Dump My Girlfriend Without Hurting Her? by NessaBoo(f): 11:07am On Dec 07
OP, Firstly you should know there's absolutely no way to break up with someone without hurting their feelings, especially if she really really loves you, and also each day you spend in the unhealthy relationship will make things worse and affect your well being, increase your guilt and make it harder for you to breakup.

My advice for you is to call her immediately, explain why you are breaking up very clearly and in simplest terms why you are breaking up with her so she won't make wrong assumptions about herself, and her insecurities won't feed her self doubts. You're certainly not the first man to dump her, so she must have a coping mechanism already, no matter how much it hurts, she will eventually get over it and move on.

3 Likes

Re: How Do I Dump My Girlfriend Without Hurting Her? by emerged01(m): 11:07am On Dec 07
When you wan start am you no tell us Na when you wan end am na im u come dey tell us.
Re: How Do I Dump My Girlfriend Without Hurting Her? by ImaIma1(f): 11:08am On Dec 07
dreamworld:

So all the guys that slept with you go married to u
?


A rhetorical question I suppose
Re: How Do I Dump My Girlfriend Without Hurting Her? by Pauladex(m): 11:08am On Dec 07
Amhappy:
Thou shall not commit adultery. Take this commandment serious in the future. You are adults, leave sex out of it till commitment.That said, there's no way she won't feel hurt. So just tell her. Have a heart to heart discussion. Bring up your past failed marriages. The high rate of broken marriages,killer spouses etc and why one should not make a mistake again. Life is too short and you don't want to waste her time. Blablabla. The earlier, the better.

I hail thee, experience they said is the best teacher. Lol

Re: How Do I Dump My Girlfriend Without Hurting Her? by paix(m): 11:10am On Dec 07
IamD18:
All of a sudden her antecedents became something to worry about after shifting her pant.
That's the mistake most girls make. They always want to use sex to keep their men.
Re: How Do I Dump My Girlfriend Without Hurting Her? by MrRitchie: 11:11am On Dec 07
the word “DUMP” is very absurd instead use separate!!!

Tell her outrightly or stop paying attention
less phone calls and less seeing each other
but the later is more advisable....
Re: How Do I Dump My Girlfriend Without Hurting Her? by Amhappy(f): 11:13am On Dec 07
ponti93:
are you saying that their are no relationships that were started and ended without sex... Of course there are... And i can tell you one or both partners still hurt over it... I hav such experience
But believe me it never the same. Sex introduces another level of intimacy and attachment in a relationship. For young people it's easier to throw away but for matured people like in OP's case,it's different. Many older people defined their relationship from day one. They don't just jump into euphoria of feelings like young people.

5 Likes 1 Share

Re: How Do I Dump My Girlfriend Without Hurting Her? by GreenArrow2: 11:13am On Dec 07
ImaIma1:
Why did you sleep with her when you knew somewhere at the back if mind that it won't work?

Why didn't you think of all this incompatibilities and hindrances before you got into her panties?

You want to have your cake and eat it. Now you want to run and you are looking for an easy landing.

Deal with this yourself! Why didn't you come and ask us if you should sleep with her? You wanted to taste and see. Scammers everywhere parading as boyfriends/lovers.

Abeg go siddon one side. Talking as if getting a lady to spread her legs requires some special kinda commitment these days.
Re: How Do I Dump My Girlfriend Without Hurting Her? by shababyhair(f): 11:14am On Dec 07
Re: How Do I Dump My Girlfriend Without Hurting Her? by freshaboki: 11:16am On Dec 07
IamD18:
All of a sudden her antecedents became something to worry about after shifting her pant.

grin grin grin grin grin
GUY U NO WELL O!
THANKS FOR MAKING ME LAUGH THIS HARD. BEEN A WHILE HAVE LAUGHED THIS HARD. THE TRUTH BE TOLD, YOU HAVE A POINT.
Re: How Do I Dump My Girlfriend Without Hurting Her? by OMNIVIRUS: 11:16am On Dec 07
Op, Its very easy, tell her you don't see the relationship working out well in future. simple.

Hurt or no Hurt, there is never anything like a clean break in a relationship. maybe you feel like you're gonna hurt her cause you've promised her a lot and the sex part. As for the promise, you're only human, as for the sex, it was consensual, after all, its not her first.

Don't marry and be with some one cause of sympathy, else you'd live miserably

1 Like

Re: How Do I Dump My Girlfriend Without Hurting Her? by damzy88: 11:18am On Dec 07
IamD18:
All of a sudden her antecedents became something to worry about after shifting her pant.
grin grin grin
Re: How Do I Dump My Girlfriend Without Hurting Her? by Tundexxy(m): 11:19am On Dec 07
Declare the relationship inconclusive grin

1 Like

Re: How Do I Dump My Girlfriend Without Hurting Her? by frozen70(f): 11:20am On Dec 07
samguru:
For mature minds only.

I need your advice on how to dumb a lady which I don't like but we have been dating in the last 5 months.
She was introduced to me by a friend and since then I thought the relationship can lead to marriage but my instinct keeps telling she is not the one.

I have had sex with her anyway but her antecedents is something to worry about as she has been married and the marriage crashed without a child.

I have also married with a male child but the marriage crashed due to crazy intolerable behaviours of my ex.
This lady has shown some signs which my ex possessed and I don't want to experience such marriage again.

Please how do I dump her without having any feeling of guilt.

Please feminists should keep off this thread.


Just tell her that someone is pregnant for you and your parents have gone to assure the family that you will marry their daughter

Meanwhile stop beding them just like that if you aren't serious in settling down with one

Sex is not what you should look out for in your next relationship but character and attitude, then,
you too work on your ability to tolerate ladies and their flaws

You can't get a perfect lady but you can get something close to it.
just the same way ladies can't get a perfect man.

Or do you guys think ladies don't have choices of what they too want in a man ?

2 Likes

Re: How Do I Dump My Girlfriend Without Hurting Her? by lefulefu(m): 11:20am On Dec 07
So after u don suck all the juice comot from her body like orange u now want to dump hercheesycheesycheesy

1 Like

Re: How Do I Dump My Girlfriend Without Hurting Her? by Mutemenot(m): 11:20am On Dec 07
Start doing things she hates most and possibly get your male friend (unknown to her) to approach her for relatonship via text or calls... gradually she 'll be in the position you can withdraw your self from the relationship
Re: How Do I Dump My Girlfriend Without Hurting Her? by xtervaganza(m): 11:22am On Dec 07
Saffi:
Stupid fools just to open pant and run away. You know how to open your big mouth for sex, but to be a man and tell her how you feel is a problem. I don’t understand this generation, bunch of loser men.
why your blood de hot? E be like say dem don open your pant well well and later dump you.



Mind you, he's not responsible for your pain and anger so japa
Re: How Do I Dump My Girlfriend Without Hurting Her? by AnanseK(m): 11:24am On Dec 07
It is at least the second time this is happening to you and you sound so self righteous. Have you considered that you may be the one at fault?

In any case a gift of a flat in a choice area , a new car and some money to start a business plus a genuine apology can alleviate some of the emotional trauma. You can then go back to the market and search for the next victim.

1 Like

Re: How Do I Dump My Girlfriend Without Hurting Her? by belbon4grace: 11:24am On Dec 07
You would have studied her before even going to bed with her, now she is not worth been married to. Carry your cross.
Re: How Do I Dump My Girlfriend Without Hurting Her? by ImaIma1(f): 11:28am On Dec 07
GreenArrow2:


Abeg go siddon one side. Talking as if getting a lady to spread her legs requires some special kinda commitment these days.


While I sit down one side, you can keep standing

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