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Stats: 2,910,156 members, 7,019,898 topics. Date: Tuesday, 16 August 2022 at 01:14 PM
|Re: I Was A Husband: My Experience by Dyt(f): 12:17am On May 13, 2020|
Marriage isn't just all.about you, partner or kids.
We all need someone
You don't have to be married before you have a partner
Marriage is just a form of respect
|Re: I Was A Husband: My Experience by NoToPile: 12:17am On May 13, 2020|
I am so sorry OP for what you had to go through may you find healing.
Things can go haywire in any marriage, one might have even married the best/right partner and things can still go wrong and it doesn't necessarily mean they didn't marry the right person.
I believe marriage requires lots of work and lots of prayers even if it was God that told us that partner is the best for us.
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|Re: I Was A Husband: My Experience by Gift7428: 1:49am On May 13, 2020|
You highlighted just one part and refused to move to the next line.
I cant with you please.
|Re: I Was A Husband: My Experience by Prymestrr(m): 3:05am On May 13, 2020|
Dyt:Better to have a partner and leave it at that than to make her a wife. That way it's easy to walk and never look back when the crazy starts. No divorce, no careless fights, no stress what so ever.
|Re: I Was A Husband: My Experience by femi4: 6:41am On May 13, 2020|
Obingene:Just because of one mismanagement up there. If water kill your child....will you stop drinking water
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|Re: I Was A Husband: My Experience by Usorohtheman(m): 7:12am On May 13, 2020|
life is strange and complicated. it is all politics.
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|Re: I Was A Husband: My Experience by Bestinstinct(m): 7:36am On May 13, 2020|
Dear OP, I understand you perfectly. Women possesses the ability to bring out the monster in the meekest of all men. Your story just aroused my fears in life "being broke". The way a woman talks and calculate what she spends during a man's trying times can kill. Every contribution they make becomes an headline. You are very strong to wait that long. My life no hard, if I am not doing well enough or shit happened and I can't do well....any woman in my life can leave.
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|Re: I Was A Husband: My Experience by CHoccolaTE: 7:50am On May 13, 2020|
Who will take care of you in your old age
|Re: I Was A Husband: My Experience by CHoccolaTE: 7:55am On May 13, 2020|
When you had no job and she was providing were you assisting her with chores and childcare at least to make things easier for her and reduce stress or were you being bossy and expecting 24/7 complete submission from her?
I don't even trust marital stories on nairaland because the party telling the story will ALWAYS hide their own faults and magnify the wrongdoings of their partners
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|Re: I Was A Husband: My Experience by Prymestrr(m): 8:08am On May 13, 2020|
CHoccolaTE:Myself Better to save and plan for my old age than depend on another human being who will use me as target practice for their weird fetish
Besides, my son would have been a made man in my old age
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|Re: I Was A Husband: My Experience by CHoccolaTE: 8:14am On May 13, 2020|
Its better you work extra hard towards making sure your son ends up as a rich man, because if not......hmmm
And pray hard that he outlives you
|Re: I Was A Husband: My Experience by tunmiluabi: 8:15am On May 13, 2020|
I did all I could, but nothing I did was go enough.
|Re: I Was A Husband: My Experience by Prymestrr(m): 8:16am On May 13, 2020|
CHoccolaTE:Oh he's gonna be a wealthy man no doubt. And he'll outlive me too. The young bury the old where I'm from and not vice versa.
|Re: I Was A Husband: My Experience by Preferito(m): 8:19am On May 13, 2020|
What I can deduce from his story is that his wife left no room for reconciliation because she was not remorseful for her actions. If she had shown remorse she would have called her family as well as his family and confess to them. They would have been the ones to reconcile them. But she seems to be enjoying her escapades and not willing to soft pedal. So there is no need for the OP to be fighting a lost battle. The best option for him was to move on and never to look back or give any chance of coming together. In most cases women like this will only remember their husband when they encounter a disastrous ending in their life. Thus they will begin to reminisce when things was working well and they would wish they can turn back the hands of the clock. But I love the fact that you have genuinely moved on. Don't rush into another relationship. Take your time and look before you leap. Also try and keep your mind open as much as possible so that you will not be shocked by human actions or reactions.
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|Re: I Was A Husband: My Experience by faithfull18(f): 9:47am On May 13, 2020|
LuQuLuQu:These issues are happening.
|Re: I Was A Husband: My Experience by faithfull18(f): 9:51am On May 13, 2020|
Dyt:So you wouldn't mind a man having you as a partner better still babymama without doing the needful
|Re: I Was A Husband: My Experience by Dyt(f): 10:32am On May 13, 2020|
I am not responsible for your thoughts ma'am
|Re: I Was A Husband: My Experience by faithfull18(f): 10:38am On May 13, 2020|
Dyt:I only expatiated on what you said
|Re: I Was A Husband: My Experience by prettysassygirl(f): 10:47am On May 13, 2020|
This is really pathetic,I pray never to be this of person to my husband when things go awry.
|Re: I Was A Husband: My Experience by Dyt(f): 11:16am On May 13, 2020|
Good sense of reasoning you got there baby
I am proud of you
|Re: I Was A Husband: My Experience by generationz(f): 12:23pm On May 13, 2020|
This can only come from someone with experience. That's why I laugh when I see single people giving marriage advice. It was something I used to do frequently but learnt that you can never really know the true nature of what people have been through, enjoyed and endured in a relationship as an outsider.
I admire your maturity.
33 Likes 2 Shares
|Re: I Was A Husband: My Experience by generationz(f): 12:27pm On May 13, 2020|
Yes, marriage is truly overrated. Some people are lucky and get it right without so much effort while some struggle to get it right. Thousands, on the other hand, are just suffering and smiling. The spark is gone and reality has set in.
I don't think many people really sit down to think of the worst happening before setting out on this journey.
|Re: I Was A Husband: My Experience by Ybaby: 12:48pm On May 13, 2020|
Such a sad story. Glad you are doing well.
See women are not good at paying a man's bills. We are not wired that way.
She starts seeing such a man as a child.
Once a man stops seeing the woman as his bread winner - the way will open for him like it opened for OP.
Young men get money! there is a financial clock for men.
OP, happy for you.
|Re: I Was A Husband: My Experience by milliondollas(m): 12:48pm On May 13, 2020|
THE WIFE SURELY IS FROM SOUTH EAST OR SOUTH SOUTH MONEY IS THEIR GOD
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|Re: I Was A Husband: My Experience by Preferito(m): 1:15pm On May 13, 2020|
Ybaby:But this does not justify her infidelity
|Re: I Was A Husband: My Experience by Nobody: 1:17pm On May 13, 2020|
lemme not talk.
|Re: I Was A Husband: My Experience by Ybaby: 5:25pm On May 13, 2020|
Eventually all wives who pay all or some bills cheat. I am not saying it is good I am only stating the fact.
Wives who shelter thier husbands eventually become violent towards the husband.
See the bible knows what it was saying when it said a man who cannot provide is worse than an infidel... those wives may pretend to respect thier husband in his face but gossip their husbands to neighbours, family and friends letting them know they pay the Bills.
What OP experienced is even small. When a woman pays Bills she emasculates the man in front of him or behind him.... she will sha find a way to subliminally let the world know she wears the trouser.
Na so we see am. I pray for you that you are able to fully pay your household Bill's and kids bills if you add your wife's bill she will let the world know you are the MAN!
Sunny Ade said one man was made to escourt his wife to her boyfriend house.... na money cause am.
Man is on earth to pay Bill's, to work and uplift his family...... may all men be able to do this because the consequences of otherwise is severe.
An angel can become a witch if she is made to pay a man's bills
53 Likes 7 Shares
|Re: I Was A Husband: My Experience by bukatyne(f): 6:23pm On May 13, 2020|
Marriages are made in heaven and lived out on earth.
|Re: I Was A Husband: My Experience by bukatyne(f): 6:30pm On May 13, 2020|
So what do you think about men/culture who think it is ok to 'disrespect' women because they pay the bills?
|Re: I Was A Husband: My Experience by SweetCunt97(f): 6:39pm On May 13, 2020|
Oh well, most ladies get irritated when a man can no longer provide and they are the ones providing...
Good life lessons gotten from this though.
Many women marry not for love but what a man can provide so if he's unable to provide along the way, irritation sets in.
32 Likes 2 Shares
|Re: I Was A Husband: My Experience by Mariangeles(f): 6:42pm On May 13, 2020|
You took the words right out of my head.
These words are similar to what I commented on another thread.
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|Re: I Was A Husband: My Experience by DeeMain(m): 6:42pm On May 13, 2020|
Fact. Now this is the reality of many women funded homes, whether the funding is partly or fully, but it usually manifests more when the man is struggling.
I agree with you that a man must ensure that he is able to take financial care of his home.
For balance, my question is does the marriage vow, for better or worse, not mean anything to the women folk?
Is there no way for the finance-providing woman to be genuinely respectful and supportive of his man while the man finds a way to overcome his money travails?
Shouldn't women also begin to equip themselves with the resources and resilience to be able to withstand this kind of reversal of roles when their husband's financial circumstance begins to falter so as to save their marriage and their children are not raised in single parent homes? Is money all that counts?
Forgive me, I am just thinking out aloud. This problem of men losing financial power and women taking over family responsibility is becoming too rife and there seems to be no end in sight.
The family is under threat by this phenomenon.
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