₦airaland Forum

johnydon22:
and now i just turned to a science teacher... lol.. now hit google and read it up...

[size=14pt]hahahahahahahahahaha!!![/size]
you don't know the answer do you?

babyshaQ1:
Atheist do not believe in any god and it is not a belief system..How is that so difficult to understand? Ok..I'll make it clear for you..Is a child born with a belief system inherent or is it taught?? Hope you get it now..You were taught to believe whatever myth you consider sacred. Atheism is NOT a belief system! Has evolution stopped? the simple answer is NO! Evolution is a very very slow process that occurs way beyond the time span of your imagination (say 100 years) Do you think a million years from now the world as you know it would be the same as it is now? and if the question was an attempt to fault evolution, read your bible again about your jewish god creating the world in 7 days (oops 6 days)...Let there be light in the first day, then created the sun in the third lol...destroyed the earth, killed his creations except some that he asked his servant Noah to fit in an ark...let's pretend the ark had coolers for penguins and polar bears...Oh and after the great flood what did Noah do? He made sacrifices unto god lol with endangered animals left in the ark...Common!! Read your book from beginning to end and come back to speak.. Even the pope has admitted that god doesn't have a magic wand...I won't respond if you do not have meaningful things to say...I don't have answers for your earlier questions but don't act like the bible explains anything. If it does, provide them...Just because life and nature is complex does not mean bible stories explain anything...NB: If by now you still think man is made from dust and woman from a man's rib PLEASE don't bother responding

at 100 years for evolution.
You see jonnydon? I know a little more than some of your folks here obviously

Of course GOD can create the world in 6days. He is GOD unlimited, HIs powers are waaaay beyond your comprehension! it even marvels me how people belittle him by thinking he only created life on this planet.

i think your problem is you were limited to believing the bible when you were a christian(i could be wrong). the bible doesn't explain everything. in fact it is a very brief summary on what GOD can really do but today Christians take it as all in all which is their main mistake. but just because the bible isn't complete doesn't mean GOD doesn't exist.


question for you, have you ever had anything supernatural, non-scientifically explainable happen to you? if you havent then i understand why you wont believe in the supernatural.

another question. has it ever bothered you that the ancient creation story seems to follow the process of evolution? How did those illiterate ignorant desert authors like johnydon22 likes to call them know the exact sequence of how things were created?

any answers?

johnydon22:
Lolzzz please which one is God almighty? zeus answers that too and so does osiris? so?
which of them are you referring to please?

When i tell people you guys are simply copy-pasting your ideas, they dont believe me.
zeus is not referred as god almighty anywhere dude. He was known as the father of the gods.
osiris was never hailed as god almighty but as god of the underworld he was hailed as "king of the living". you should do some reading up yourself bro.

but your cronies wont see this. thats the problem with atheism(almost same as blind christianity). you refuse to learn new things

dalaman:
God is a man made idea and creation that is why there are many different Gods, Goddesses and religions.

Ok. Sure. that's why all of Jesus disciples preferred to die horrible deaths than deny Christ. because they wanted to propagate their man made idea. Gotcha.

johnydon22:
This clearly shows you don't know anything about science… those humanoids in existence millions of years ago are the species that evolved until it gets to modern man.
Example is the humanoid australopecine gave rise to adipethecus.. bros i suggest you first read about evolution stop disgracing yourself here ...

oh, sorry, silly me. can you please tell me how long it took for australopecine (the correct term by the way is Australopithecus) to give rise to adipethecus?( correct spelling ardipithecus), humble me with an answer pls.

pls note that the above species of hominines are now under debate as to whether they are part of the humaniod evolutionary tree, but i guess thats just me talking.


or lemme wait so you can ask google, you who know so much about science sir.

johnydon22:
No the correct thing should be, If their are no god "ideas" they wont be atheists.(people that disbelief the idea.

The God concept is a very archaic idea, and that is it.. an idea if you say its reality show me it is..

No, the correct thing is "If there was no GOd there wouldnt be atheists. we have had this argument before. show me a single quote in your atheism library against Zeus and I will show you a thousand against God almighty. you know within yourself that this fight is against the almighty, despite the fact you keep trying to show that atheism is anti-all-gods.

johnydon22:
See it this way.
Theist : Their is a sky man, that created the universe and has a son without a wife and is not concerned with all the natural disasters (evidently) but is concerned if i bang my girl friend or not.

Atheist: I don't believe you... prove it to me..

but that's not what this thread is about, is it? This thread is about atheists having blind faith in non-godism and science, even when science is wrong.

N.B . . i'm not a fan of evolution, more studies are being carried out on it and it still requires a lot of work and experiment but at least read something before asking questions..

Evolution takes millions of years, you probably need to stick around for that long to witness it.

oh, but according to science, humanity has been around for a few million years already. We should have evolved into something else by now as a means of sheer necessity shouldn't we?

of course you'd have reservations about evolution. Too many holes to be punched into. BUT it is a main scientific milestone. so if scientists can be wrong about evolution and even carbon dating, is it possible they can be wrong about the existence of GOD as well?

[quote author=johnydon22 post=31789636][/quote][size=14pt]“If there were no God, there would be no atheists.”-GK Chesterton[/size]

babyshaQ1:
Atheists just don't believe. Atheism is not a belief system. Christianity does not provide answers to questions on how humans or any other thing in nature came to being, neither does any religion and I think it's plain laziness and ignorantly stubborn to attribute gaps in knowledge to any god...at least there are people out there looking for answers and explain unlike those who just hold on to ridiculous stories as an account of creation...why did your god stop creating anyway I'd rather believe my tradition's myth of creation or Oduduwa's story than foolishly believe that we all came from a Jew named Noah

It is rather interesting how you guys jumped the other questions I asked and zoned in on this one.
atheists not believing in God with such enthusiasm IS a VERY FERVENT BELIEF in itself. All atheists believe in the non-existence of God or gods, and short of a physical contact with such deities, will simply refuse to follow an argument for the existence of a creator. THAT in itself is a firm belief system.


as for your second paragraph, has evolution stopped? if yes why? if no why haven't we as humans evolved 4 pairs of hands since we are so busy all the time?

Lizabeth25:
LOL.......still, it will not stop me from telling the truth about God's love!



For God so love the world, that He gave HIS ONLY begotten son, that whosoever shall believe in Him will not perish but have everlasting life.



John 3:16

OK.
That's very admirable
Keep it up.

Lizabeth25:
NO. God doesnt hate. He just dont want us to sin against him!

You must be new to the religion section.

It's not a place to share God's love. The folk here don't like it. Religion section on naira land actually exists to blaspheme and ridicule and pour out their hatred on God and Christians. Probably part of the reason why the Muslims asked for their own special section. It would be good you know this before going any further.

Come op, why did you change the title of the thread?

babyshaQ1:
Good thing you have well thought questions...but how does Christianity answer any of these??

The topic is on atheists having faith i.e believing in something they can't prove. I was just trying to show him that he uses faith as well.


This thread don go far oh! Am in the office, will address further when I get home.

logica:
You see how you exposed yourself. If you read enough scientific publications, you would have seen enough photos that prove the "Big Bang". Now, it may not be exactly as conceived by human minds in the 21st Century, but there is enough proof. The best way I can explain it to you is the "echo". When somebody shouts in the right geographical area where sound can bounce back, you hear the echo(es) ring for some time. The "echo" of the Big Bang can still be "heard".

OK ok. Lemme not laugh. Let me say I didn't understand what you typed up there. You have pictures of the big bang or you have pictures that hypothetically prove the big bang theory. Because it is the former I asked for and not the later.

Your 'echo' explanation is as empty as an echo itself. You hear an echo in the universe from your scientific equipment, and you now choose to define it's source. How do you know the echo is not God 's voice, or if that example offends you ; the explosion of some ancient nebulae?

Try again bro.

Oh and replace anywhere you wrote "proof" with "faith".

I' ll leave you to decide whether I read scientific journals or not.

It's simple, really.
Show us a picture of the big bang. After all according to you guys 'seeing is believing'.

You can't? It's just a theory i.e a human idea? OK then.

And your whole knowledge of the universe is based on this idea that you hold so close to your hearts? OK.

Maybe you can create the big bang in a lab. I heard it has been attempted in labs numerous times. Em... Any success yet?

Have you guys concluded on what killed all the dinosaurs at once? Our Bible tells us it's a flood. We don't need to prove that since we silly christians have faith. Yet the sedimentation of dinosaur bones/fossils in the geological plates seem to prove we are right. You guys extrapolated and said a huge meteorite hit earth and killed everything off. Yet that doesn't explain how the millions of fossils are arranged in layers ALL OVER THE WORLD.

Then again I have another question. According to scientists evolution is what brought about the variety in plant and animal life on earth, right? We have over five thousand years of human history, surely it's enough time for elephants to evolve into something else? No? How long does a species need to evolve into a better version? Any idea?


Still on this evolution thing, if the meteor or whatever it was, killed off the entire population of dinosaurs, then why didn't another evolutionary process bring them back? A few million years(according to science) passed after the meteor struck, why don't we have at least miniature dinosaurs running around all over the place?


How come a meteorite killed off ONLY dinosaurs and left other creatures to survive?


Finally, and this one is off point but I decided to throw it in anyway, how come there is no atmosphere on the moon (space is a vacuum) yet if you watch the video of Neil Armstrong planting the American flag on the surface of the moon you see the flag blowing in the wind? The flag should be stationery /still, right? Correct me if am wrong pls.



Like I said previously, I admire the way you guys follow these white men with blatant abandon, one would almost want to say you have blind faith in your atheist masters. I hope for your sake that you are right. Because if you are wrong and death is not the end of it and there actually is a GOD and you have been insulting his sacredness... well, good luck to you.

It is better you believe in your atheism and stop the blaspheming of Someone you don't believe in or understand. That way hopefully there won't be any bad blood and it might be easier in the afterlife for you IF we christians are right. If we are wrong then it won't matter anyway.

Rose2014:
Oh this is horror abi?
Mcdokwe's is less horror because his lady didn't die of internal bleeding two days later.


You're asking about the friend he called to help him. It may have been one of these guys on nl cheering domestic violence

Violence is violence and let's not only condemn it when it leads to death

Your point in bold is noted. However the bone of contention on that thread(for me anyway) was that you ladies were so ready to crucify and bury mcdokwe in that thread and yet stubbornly refused to acknowledge that the lady did anything wrong at all. She persistently provoked him verbally and physically even to the point of preventing him from exiting the situation in which he found he was fast losing control of and went on to attack him with anything that came in handy! You girls refused to correct her at all! That is injustice and hypocrisy of the highest order and no right-thinking person would condone such behaviour!

The family of the late Obiageli Anajekwu, who allegedly died two days after she was beaten by her husband, Anajekwu, has called on the Lagos State Commissioner of Police (CP), Mr. Kayode Aderanti to intervene in the interest of justice.

The family is accusing the police of denying them justice

The deceased, a 37- year-old graduate of Economics from the University of Nigeria, Nsukka, got married to Anajekwu in 2002.

After their traditional marriage, her husband’s business started dwindling financially. Her hubby went back to Brazil where he was based with a promise to return in 2003 when things would have improved.

Long distance relationship. No way of knowing this man's true nature. Is he violent, a drug dealer? Gay?

The husband did not return until 2011, and on his way back through Cameroon, he was arrested, tried and jailed for three years over alleged drug offences. While in jail, his wife was visiting him frequently to take care of his needs.

This man abandoned his wife for 9 solid years. Does this sound like a responsible person? Do we know what would have happened to him all these years, how he was surviving? What kind of people he was keeping company with?

And after 9 good long years, the next you hear of him is that he is in a jail in Cameroon for drug trafficking. My people, does this sound in any way like a responsible person? A gentle person? A 'real man' like some of our in-house feminists say?

A family member, Nnamdi Eze, said: “She spent all her life savings estimated at about N850, 000 catering to her husband’s needs until he regained his freedom and returned to Nigeria in 2013.

This man was in jail for 2 years. He mixed with criminals and braggards, vagabonds and murderers for 2 years! Can we honestly say some of the behaviors of his new-found friends did not rub off on him?
His life has been on hold for 2yrs. Are we not by now dealing with a very frustrated and possibly violent individual?

Eze said upon his return, her sister’s husband moved with his wife into his personal house at, Okoye Close, Iyana-Iba Estate, Igbo-Elerin, Lagos.

“In December 2014, after allegedly beating his wife, he invited his relations and others and claimed that he discovered a charm in her wife’s bag and threatened to send her away.

This may actually not be the first act of violence from the man since his release from prison. We do not have the full facts but it might be safe to assume that the woman has been having it tough with a man who she hasn't lived with in almost a decade, whose behaviour she does not know, in fact, a total stranger. He night have started the slaps and beatings much earlier for all we know.

“Consequent upon this claim, and his decision to send his wife away, a meeting of representatives of both families was called with the community chief of his village, Chief Ezeani and the suspect’s father, present. Fortunately, the suspect’s father revealed that the item his son saw in his wife’s bag was prepared by him and given to her for protection against evil attacks by some members of their family

.

First error and first line of suspicion. If the charm was to protect the family then why not tell the husband about it?

“

The suspect’s father noted that he had to prepare the protection after he and his daughter-in-law, Obiageli had swollen legs which were treated by a traditional healer who informed them about those responsible and recommended the protective charms to ward off further evil attacks.

What is the connection between the suspect' father and his wife? Why are they so close that they would warrant being 'attacked' together? Anyway.

“The suspect’s father, further told his son that the charm was not meant to harm him but to protect his wife and himself from evil members of their family, and counseled that it should not be enough reason to end their marriage

Then he should have told his son.

He told his son that if he insisted on sending his wife away, he should set up a supermarket for her and refund her the money she spent taking care of him while in prison. The suspect agreed. It was, however, also agreed that his wife will remain with him until he fulfilled all the details of agreements which he said he would do after selling his house

.

Very nice father in law. Telling his son to sell his house (probably one of the few things the suspect has left in his life). Very nice and understanding and caring father in law.

“

While the deceased was still waiting for her husband to settle her as agreed, the suspect on January 19, 2015 allegedly beat her up and with the help of his friend threw her out with her property at 1am, leaving her with severe injuries

.
I could be wrong, but I wouldn't stay in a man's house waiting for him to sell it and give the money to me. Sounds suicidal. I stand to be corrected.

Anyways for whatever reason this man then beats up his wife severely and then calls his friend at 1am in the morning(what kind of friend is that?) to help throw out his wife(sounds like like a responsible friend to you?)




“

She ran to her friend, one Chinyere Onyali, who advised her to report the incident at the Adolf police station. “ The police did not intervene until she died two days later on January 21, 2015 at her friend’s house. Obiageli slumped in her friend’s house and when her friend called her husband to inform him that his wife had slumped, he said he did not know her. The police arrested him but immediately released him.

“ Our pain is that police investigation had been very slow and tardy, making us to suspect that we may not get justice. The police have been demanding various sums of money from us for embalmment and autopsy which we have paid, but they have bluntly refused to charge the matter to court.

The wife obviously died from internal bleeding. The rest is the sad and sorry case of being at the mercy of the Nigerian police.



IN SUMMARY
This is a tale of estrangement, frustration, witchcraft, anger, distrust, unadulterated remorselessness, unbridled violence and ultimately death. The man in person is a convicted criminal that spent many unknown years abroad, two years in a foreign prison and was capable of rousing a friend in the middle of the night to throw out his wife.
This man is a certified monster. The woman should have escaped while she had the chance.




P. S
How in any way is this horror story related to the Mcdokwe incident?

Op..
Realize first of all that the bf that 'insisted' you see a doctor is probably HIV positive too, hence his wanting you to do a test.

What the doctor did was wrong, he should not have done the test without counseling you first. Sorry about that. However it was also done for your own good, the sooner you start treatment the better. It's just that he should have prepared your mind better for it. It's not an easy thing living with hiv but people do it and live very healthy lives. It can be terrifying at first but with proper counselling and going to their clubs and seeing others in the same boat with you and learning from them, you will eventually adjust and live an acceptably normal life.
. It is well.

DickDastardly:
Good to know this. Thanks

This guy no go near any big hospital again!

bukatyne:
It is a first time and I believe There is room for forgiveness (the first time)

This would go with severe warning for the guy never to try it again or a retaliation for my sharp sisters. After This forgiveness...

Yea, it can.

Even If a couple is divorced and they realize their mistakes, nothing stops them from remarrying IMHO

Agreed.

bukatyne:
Oh really?

1. The first slap breaks a woman especially when he was not abusive when they married.

2. The extreme cases are more common than you think.

3. What makes a lady date the guy who beats her and keeps forgiving a cheat when he is not rich?

4. What makes her stay with such men when she is not old?

5. I am removing greed and desperation from the equation.

1. lol. That must be some weak-a$$ woman. Women are not as emotionally or phisically fragile as you think

2. NO they are not. i happen to have some experience with these things so I know for a fact that the odd slap is more common than the extreme nollywood movies you keep trying to paint.

3. money, affluence, status.

4. Love, money, affluence, status, respect for the man.

5. That's cheating. Desperation never even came to mind but it is probably a very valid reason as well.

Shollypopzz:
Let's just agree to disagree on physical abuse because I will never see your point.

Ok then.

bukatyne:
First time no

Second time, yea.

Leaving for me does not necessarily mean remarriage (not a fan). The wife can leave for a while pending resolution of the issues.

why first time no? How are you sure he isnt going to stab her with a knife the second time? why not leave at once, the moment she is slapped ten years into her marriage?

and what do you mean by resolution of issues? Can this mean that the man will be cautioned and warned not to hit her again and then when both are relaxed and have come to an understanding she can return?

bukatyne:
How does a woman in an abusive marriage constitute or ensure a proper family?

Or the man is a monster to his wife and becomes saints to his kids?

Or he beats mama where nobody can see or he ships the kids to a boarding house So he can deal with mama wella?

I am trying to understand How a broken woman can be any Good to herself talk more of kids.

She can't.
what you described above is an extremely violent relationship and should not be condoned in anyway.
it is far removed from what i was talking about.

bukatyne:
Considering you are not at the receiving end, it is ok

bukatyne, would you tell a woman to leave her five year marriage and kids because the husband slapped her?

Shollypopzz:
Physical abuse is not extreme enough? She should only leave when she thinks the man wants to kill her?? Are you trolling me?!!!!!!

Wrong! The correct statement should be, "there is nothing like having a positive father figure". What is the point of having a father figure if the only image you ascribe to him is that of violence, nagging, and abuse? Is has been shown that over 60% of males who grew up with abusive fathers end up abusing their partners. A father plays an important role in shaping the mind of his daughter. He is the first male she gets to know and love. Her first definition of who a man is, is gotten from her father. If she ascribes physical abuse to being a man, she is going to expect that from any other man in her life.


Let me give an example that might help you understand my POV. I have never caught my father cheating but because of my friends and the society I grew up in, I believed that all men cheated. It had been ingrained in my mind subconsciously from my environment and from other people's stories and relationships. I remember a guy (17 at the time) asking me out at age 13 and for whatever reason, he brought up cheating (Can't remember the details, it's been a few years). I remember telling him that, "Well, I expect you to cheat. That's what guys do". Basically, I was telling this guy that he could cheat on me and I wouldn't be mad. Can you imagine?! At such a young age, I had believed the lies that I kept on hearing. He even thought I was super cool for saying that, which made feel like what I was saying made sense.

This ideology didn't last for long but at times, I find myself still unlearning the bullsh1t that growing up in a patriarchal society teaches you. You could have sowed the first seed in that girl's life by telling her that it is possible for someone to love her without hitting her. I hope by the time she realizes it, it's not too late.

lol@ sowed the first seed.
First off, I did talk to her about it. if you re-read my post you will see where i saw her way of thinking as weird, and i told her as much but she was adamant and even went on with her friends to plan the fake quarrel behind my back.

second off, I knew you were going to say something in the lines of your first sentence hence my caveat at the end of my last post. Physical abuse is wrong, yes, but it is DEFINITELY not the end of the world like you ladies like to paint it on here. There are men who strike out in anger at their wives but definitely not to the point of sending her to the hospital. i know a funny tale of a guy who bends his wife over his knee and spanks her bum good and hard when he wants to teach her a lesson. Their children did NOT grow up in any way to be wife beaters or invalids to the society(they are actually very successful folk). I wouldn't tell a woman to pack out of her matrimonial home for instance because the man slapped her. i would caution him not to do it again though.

i am not condoning physical abuse in any way, far from it. And i do think what the op wrote up there is insane. However, I recognize that some people's way of reasoning differs from others. That girl up there will never marry a gentleman. They will never be able to get along because their line of reasoning will always be polar opposites.

What is the point of having a father figure if the only image you ascribe to him is that of violence, nagging, and abuse?

this is an overly dramatic statement. Many fathers hit out at their wives once in a while and are still good caregivers, providers and wonderful with kids. the world isn't black and white.


and how are you sure your statistics of 60% wouldn't have occurred regardless of whether the boys had abusive fathers or not? How are you sure the boys weren't abusive because males are naturally more aggressive?

I believe physical abuse is wrong and should be discouraged, but not all warrants the woman packing her load and leaving the house with her children.

Shollypopzz:
This is not a matter of variety! What you should have done is ask about her background. Did she grow up in a house where her father abused her mother regularly? Did she have an ex that constantly abused her while claiming to love her?

No she didnt grow up in an abusive home. Mr Tega was a perfect gentleman. The mother might have been slightly verbally abusive though.
No, this guy was her first boyfriend.

It was a kind of in-thing around warri at the time. Most of them ladies saw a guy who couldnt hit them(of course there must be a good reason,go figure) as a wuss/gay/boy. Dunno if they still feel that way, any warri babe confirm pls. (warri girls are tough!)

This is a lady who has been conditioned to see abuse as normal. The men in her lives have abused her or abused women around her to the point where she attributes love to abuse. She is in mental bondage and she needs to seek help from a professional.

While this may be true I very much doubt she thinks so. She was an aspiring student, very social and caring. Just had a wierd view on love(to me anyway).

This is why I hate women who stay with an abusive man for the sake of their children. They do more harm to those kids by staying

No. They stay because they are willing to sacrifice even their lives to ensure their kids have the very best and that includes a proper family. There is nothing as complete in a child's life as having a father figure as well as a mother figure. Life is not a bed of roses and no situation is perfect.

Of course there are extremes to all issues, a woman shouldn't remain in a house where the man obviously wants to kill her.

Khabuqi:
Rose, Na wa o
You no go leave this matter alone ehn. Are you sure you are not one of Miraijj's friends?

Do you know that the same thing might happen to the girl again if she doesn't change her ways. I mean, you are telling her to leave the guy which is understandable, but what you fail to do is to tell her the truth. She needs to change her ways too. The crime of assault has no gender.
You can't just tell a guy to stand there and let a woman abuse him just because she has a vagína. Abeggi both of them get wahala joo.

This is a very very good point.

I mean, it is all well and good to bash the guy for hitting her but none of them ladies are addressing why she was hit. Someone is even rejoicing that the man is begging her to come back and she is refusing, which man in his right senses wants to be with a foul-mouthed single mother
The girl had better count her teeth with her tongue and fix her scorpion mouth. Hopefully her next boyfriend will not fall prey to it

kaboninc:
@5minsmadness

Bro, you're not the only one who have analysed this issue and decided to call a spade a spade. Yet some folks who think because they have a cult followership have just decided to twist issues.

Every sane post from very sane folks have always said one thing. Both are guilty. Yet, these 'I over sabi' feel otherwise.

Don't mind them.
It's obvious they are just supporting the woman blindly because she is a woman. Anyone reading the posts would see that the guy was pushed to the wall.

mcdokwe:
I read a lot about how men who hit their partners are nothing but beasts, I nearly joined the bandwagon of accusers because I couldn't fathom how uncontrollable one's temper could be as to turn one's partner to a punching bag.

Don't get me wrong, I deeply regret I ever hit her, unfortunately that is one reason that apparently hold water as a reason for leaving even though she never gets to tell the whole story.

She had been a very good girl, and even till date, the only girl I have lost myself in love to. Yes, I have been a broke ass nigga and thankfully she could be a low maintenance lady.

She once told me how some of her stupid friends asked if I have hit her before obviously looking for shortfalls to convince her she shouldn't be dating me and how she proudly told them I hadn't for once.

this shows our man is not naturally a woman beater. According to this statement She even attests to it and it is also obvious her 'friends' have been looking for a way for them to break up since.

In fairness to the truth, I learnt a lot from her and having her taught me how to treat my sister who was her age better.
At a point in her life, she had no genuine friend and would always moan to me how bad some friend or the other treated her and how she wasn't interested in their friendship anymore and I had to constantly remind her that people are different and so with their motives, I always encouraged her to try to understand such motives before writing them off.
I literally became her only friend and unfortunately shoved some people who could have been some sort of relief aside so much that we had just each other
Days became weeks and months and she conceived for me and a lot started changing about her. Maybe in her bid to feel acceptable, she got entangled with people she wrote completely off before, this wasn't a so much of a challenge because atleast she could whine less about them to me, her dress sense changed and she turned deaf ears to my appeal for explanation, I had to adapt to some of those challenges but unfortunately those friends became more valuable to her than myself even though we had a child coming and lived together, she shared less of her worries with me but would tell them even the minutest detail of our relationship which were frequently misrepresented maybe in a bid to gain sympathy which she eventually got. They explained my actions and inactions better than I could and she could go for days without talking to me so long as the meal was provides and the babies need met, she opted for a break anytime I told her of her upsetting attitude and the need to work on it, but would never tell me of her own misgivings towards me even when I plead so I could work on myself too, but would rather discuss unthinkable issues with her friends.

worthy of note. If you have a problem with your spouse, discuss with him. Dont go about telling friends you initially wrote off, who initially had misgivings about a man. they tend to blow things out of proportion and leave you feeling worse off than when you came. we see a lot of this on nairaland for example.

Fast forward to that particular day, a lady who I encouraged her to make friends with because of her distress and the feeling we could be of help to sent a text to her sim which happened to be on my phone saying she needs to know when I left the house so she could come over and I was wth! This is some one I brought in, someone whose coming means she is to fend from my toil, and I asked what it could be that I did that should warrant such. I sent her a text telling her never to bother coming anymore as I wasn't leaving the house that day anymore. She called her back and asked her only God knows what and my lady went up in frenzy insulting me not minding that a third party was there.
Minutes later the other girl stopped by to apologise stating that I misunderstood her text but my girlfriend continued the insult asking why she should bother to explain or apologise. After a while every other person left and she became apologetically cosy, well I shrugged her off knowing her being apologetic doesn't stop her from insulting me the next minute if she felt like, and true to my prediction, even while she was still being sorry, her words turned from being apologetic to outright insult, calling me unprintable names and how I am a hopeless orphan (I lost my dad the previous year and my mum is still very much alive and she is so lettered and knows what an orphan means) well I said something too of her family because I was hurt but could never match her with words and I made to leave the house in that fit of anger.

Verbal abuse. HORRENDOUS AND HURTFUL esp as mcdokwe lost his father just the previous year.

He responds with some verbal abuse of his own but knowing he cannot match her word for word he decides to remove himself from the situation.

But she locked the door and wouldn't let me. She turned apologetic again and then insulting, in that state all I could do was pity her because I couldn't imagine how someone could be so unstable, I was visibly frustrated and made to leave the house which she wouldn't have either and I had to forcefully remove her from the way. She came back hard on my, making for anything. That could be converted into a weapon, thankfully I was stronger and made her efforts futile. I pinned her to the ground with the intention to make her realise I am stronger than our love sessions where I played weak to let her have an upper hand so she could give up already, but the moment I released her a bit, she reached for my phone and smashed it on the floor repeatedly, I regrettably gave her some blows and because I didn't want it to continue, opened the door so a neighbour could come in a stop the fight. I later stormed out with the child and headed for a family who had rendered enough care to us and she later found her way there, I expected her to behave more in their presence but that was to wishful of me and unfortunately the ladies couldn't stop me as I gave her even deadlier blows but mehn, she never really got enough.

1. she starts throwing weapons, striking as hard as she can and he pins her to the ground but the moment he releases her she continues her attack. if you reading this cannot see that this lady is overly aggressive then you must be blind.

2, it is after this incident that he regrettably strikes back and gives her some blows and then opens the door for a neighbor to intervene. Does this look like a man interested in pommeling his wife?

She was later forced into one of the rooms in the apartment and locked up with the baby.
After a while I walked to that point seeing how pitiful she looked asked her with tears in my eyes why she was acting the way she does to which she replied with a tone that could melt the devil's heart that she didn't know and was sorry. We packed up and went back home to the astonishment of all who saw us fight. Needless to say we made love that night after which she confessed she never knew I could hit her even after I was with her at the delivery room and declared no woman should be beaten by her man. She also owned up and apologised for pushing me to that point.

Reconciliation. She is astonished he hit her. Ipso facto, he is not the physically abusive type, hence her surprise. Could it be that this night she pushed his buttons too far?

She also told me how a particular friend of hers who came in after the fight had told her not to have sex with me that night and all that.

The relationship lasted for a little longer without fights and she left while I was away for reasons still not clear to me, and looking back I regret that I ever let her pushing me to the point of hitting her but I still believe firmly that she deserved it.

Did she deserve it? Maybe she did and maybe she didn't. But the facts still remain that mcdokwe is not a habitual batterer, in fact his gf went to great lengths to provoke him that night until he finally lost control. We are all human and nobody is perfect. Even a pastor will strike back if put under the same strain this man was put under.

Should they seperate? It is left for them. However I feel the woman in question is being heavily influenced by outside sources. I do not belive in the juvenile slogan of "once a batterer, always a batterer." this statement apart from being utterly naive and simplistic, reduces battering to an unconscious reflex which repeats itself in the person after it has occurred once like a cocaine addiction. Even habits require repetition to become habits.

IN SUMMARY

This woman verbally abused a beast much larger and stronger than her and went on to prevent same beast from exiting the scene even in the face of oncoming danger and then further went on to strike at same beast until she was pinned to the ground and then smashed the beast's phone.

what was she expecting in return?

cococandy:
Why don't you start the praise and worship session before the minister comes.

Grabs mic
Testing testing, 1...2...3...icccee wateeeeerrrr!

***in Ron kenolly's voice***
I have so much been blinded by hate%oh Lord % Forgive meee...