Acidosis:



The right thing to do was to reject her food/drink. The young man is greedy and a glutton!

Omo, how can you visit your mother in law for the first time without a gift, and sit down to eat her food and drink?

Let's be honest pls, the young man is greedy and shameless.

TransAtlanticEx:
Are you sure you really wanna do this?
Cos I'm ready when you are.
Feed me and my family( a whole my family ooo) for ages yet your mama dey want kill herself say your fiance no buy bread for am?.
Why not use that money weh you want use am feed me and my generation buy your mama provisions keep for house na
And somehow its from this miserly,miserable existence that you wanna feed my family(really rich ) from?
My eldest sister got married in 2004,in 2003 when the man came for introduction,he wore shorts and was empty handed.
You know why?There was nothing he could bring that we don't have and he knew it
What you could have done sef to even cover your bf is send some money to your thirsty mom and claim your bf sent it,but instead you fought with him over it,maybe because you and your mama don plan as una go share the stipends weh the guy suppose bring,
Yet a bottom feeder like you wants to feed my generation?

Sixfeetbelle:
I don't understand why everyone is being angry over this issue to be honest. Is it that we are so poor that courtesy is now a taboo?

I was raised to always go with gifts whenever I'm visiting a family friend so even if I don't have anything on me, bread is never scarce on me. Since this is not the guy's first visit (which I expect he would have maybe shown up with wine that first time), bread would have been more than good. A bottle of groundnut even looks nice.

Let me ask: When we were growing up, did we not have uncles and aunts that always visited with gifts? Did our mothers not package gifts always whenever we went to visit a family member? So why is this one being judged differently?

I do think the lady handled the matter badly, but let's not accept 'bad behavior' as the norm because we're trying to be woke.

Trayceey:
I Need Your Opinion On This Issue That's Threatening My Relationship

My fiance wanted to come to the house to see my mum but I told him I won't be around because I'm about heading out to somewhere, so he asked me if my mum would be around, then I said yes and he said he would still go to see her and it doesn't matter if I'm not around.

When I later got home that night, my mum complained that he came empty handed. He didn't bring anything for her and she was the one who offered him her drink.

Although initially, I didn't see anything wrong with that but when my mum expressed her displeasure, I later called him to ask why he came to the house empty handed then I let him know I wasn't happy with him, that it would have been better if he didn't come. He tried arguing with me but I hung up.

Since then, we haven't spoken to each other nor visited each other. Was I wrong?

Trayceey:
I Need Your Opinion On This Issue That's Threatening My Relationship

My fiance wanted to come to the house to see my mum but I told him I won't be around because I'm about heading out to somewhere, so he asked me if my mum would be around, then I said yes and he said he would still go to see her and it doesn't matter if I'm not around.

When I later got home that night, my mum complained that he came empty handed. He didn't bring anything for her and she was the one who offered him her drink.

Although initially, I didn't see anything wrong with that but when my mum expressed her displeasure, I later called him to ask why he came to the house empty handed then I let him know I wasn't happy with him, that it would have been better if he didn't come. He tried arguing with me but I hung up.

Since then, we haven't spoken to each other nor visited each other. Was I wrong?

Trayceey:
I Need Your Opinion On This Issue That's Threatening My Relationship

My fiance wanted to come to the house to see my mum but I told him I won't be around because I'm about heading out to somewhere, so he asked me if my mum would be around, then I said yes and he said he would still go to see her and it doesn't matter if I'm not around.

When I later got home that night, my mum complained that he came empty handed. He didn't bring anything for her and she was the one who offered him her drink.

Although initially, I didn't see anything wrong with that but when my mum expressed her displeasure, I later called him to ask why he came to the house empty handed then I let him know I wasn't happy with him, that it would have been better if he didn't come. He tried arguing with me but I hung up.

Since then, we haven't spoken to each other nor visited each other. Was I wrong?

Mariangeles:


We are Africans. Let us be honest with ourselves.

A man going alone to visit his would-be mother in-law empty handed is a red flag. Something to worry about.
What was the purpose of the visit?
Even as a female, it is still wrong to go visit the mother of the man you're going to marry empty handed.

Onyemaya:
Poverty is often concealed in splendor, and often in extravagance. It is the task of many people to conceal their neediness from others. Consequently they support themselves by temporary means, and everyday is lost in contriving for tomorrow.

Nature makes us poor only when we want necessaries, but custom gives the name of poverty to the want of superfluities.

Extreme poverty anywhere is a threat to human security everywhere.

Trayceey:
you must be broke.
so many nairaland boys are broke and this is why they're so pained on this issue. You won't blame them though. This country is messed up

Miarose:
you and your mother are too hungry. Respect and courtesy >> gift.

Trayceey:
you must be broke.
so many nairaland boys are broke and this is why they're so pained on this issue. You won't blame them though. This country is messed up

BusinessCity:




You'll be a parent someday or someone beneath you would accord you without honour, then you'll understand. Your promptness to abuse me without any direct attacks against you speaks about your age, formative processes and character. I wish you well.

Fiscus105:

Means business? Can he do the business successful? That's question you should ask urself

A wise mother had seeeeeeeeeen that, if a guy that has not entered their house completely, can be so insensitive like this,.......how much is Eva? Soap, etc. The fiance action is enough to know he not matured enough to be calling responsible man,.... A man ready to carry responsibilities of wife and kids, just like you and others are complaining.

If he bought something and mother complained it was too small, that would have been a different story.

Mariangeles:


We are Africans. Let us be honest with ourselves.

A man going alone to visit his would-be mother in-law empty handed is a red flag. Something to worry about.
What was the purpose of the visit?
Even as a female, it is still wrong to go visit the mother of the man you're going to marry empty handed.

Chujor1634:
Your mentality and that of your mum is so annoying, to think that you had to even call him him instead of talking sense to your mum is the height of it all.

Lashist:

Shut up is never an abuse...its the internet so i should not detect your age from your moniker before i say shutup. Almost everyone has been accorded without honor at some point..i have had my own share and it didn't make me feel so sad..i hope you just know that bringing gifts to your bf/gf home is never a must..i wish you well too

GayPontiff:




This post and iberibe.

Now I see why Africans are tot to live on trees like monkeys.
The young man truly deserves better.
His good behavior and other characteristics a mother would want for her daughter should be overlooked and replaced with his inability to bring stuff she will shit out next morning abi?
They ain't married yet o?
I was even expecting to see her say she sided her bf on d matter but now it has turned to serious beef.
Aunty will loose a good man and you are blaming being Africa for this irrational behaviour?
She should go and apologize to him, the boy owes her mom nothing! Not at least till marriage is sure.
He is manly to have even visited the woman.
Wherever he is may good fortunes locate him.

Trayceey:
I Need Your Opinion On This Issue That's Threatening My Relationship

My fiance wanted to come to the house to see my mum but I told him I won't be around because I'm about heading out to somewhere, so he asked me if my mum would be around, then I said yes and he said he would still go to see her and it doesn't matter if I'm not around.

When I later got home that night, my mum complained that he came empty handed. He didn't bring anything for her and she was the one who offered him her drink.

Although initially, I didn't see anything wrong with that but when my mum expressed her displeasure, I later called him to ask why he came to the house empty handed then I let him know I wasn't happy with him, that it would have been better if he didn't come. He tried arguing with me but I hung up.

Since then, we haven't spoken to each other nor visited each other. Was I wrong?

Trayceey:
I Need Your Opinion On This Issue That's Threatening My Relationship

My fiance wanted to come to the house to see my mum but I told him I won't be around because I'm about heading out to somewhere, so he asked me if my mum would be around, then I said yes and he said he would still go to see her and it doesn't matter if I'm not around.

When I later got home that night, my mum complained that he came empty handed. He didn't bring anything for her and she was the one who offered him her drink.

Although initially, I didn't see anything wrong with that but when my mum expressed her displeasure, I later called him to ask why he came to the house empty handed then I let him know I wasn't happy with him, that it would have been better if he didn't come. He tried arguing with me but I hung up.

Since then, we haven't spoken to each other nor visited each other. Was I wrong?

Trayceey:
I Need Your Opinion On This Issue That's Threatening My Relationship

My fiance wanted to come to the house to see my mum but I told him I won't be around because I'm about heading out to somewhere, so he asked me if my mum would be around, then I said yes and he said he would still go to see her and it doesn't matter if I'm not around.

When I later got home that night, my mum complained that he came empty handed. He didn't bring anything for her and she was the one who offered him her drink.

Although initially, I didn't see anything wrong with that but when my mum expressed her displeasure, I later called him to ask why he came to the house empty handed then I let him know I wasn't happy with him, that it would have been better if he didn't come. He tried arguing with me but I hung up.

Since then, we haven't spoken to each other nor visited each other. Was I wrong?

Mariangeles:
How come nobody understands the principle of giving gifts and the honour that comes with it?
It is not about what you give, it is the thought that counts.
If the young man had brought something as simple as fruits and the woman complained, then she would've been wrong.

It has nothing to do with poverty. Only someone with poverty mentality would think expecting gift(s) from someone is out of place, and only someone with inferiority complex would think it is a thing of shame to except gift from a certain someone.

"A man's gift makes room for him, and brings him before great men"

Giving gifts will make way for you in the presence of Kings and great men.

Kriss216:

Not yet in-laws... They are just boyfriend and girlfriend.

Mariangeles:


We are Africans. Let us be honest with ourselves.

A man going alone to visit his would-be mother in-law empty handed is a red flag. Something to worry about.
What was the purpose of the visit?
Even as a female, it is still wrong to go visit the mother of the man you're going to marry empty handed.

ceeceeuwa:

Don't bother arguing with them. Most of them are still teenagers with opera mini free mb.
At least your mom played her part by hosting your boyfriend. Also, it's possible the guy is not well schooled on how to treat would be inlaws, you owe it to him to educate him in a subtle manner. Your approach to the matter must have put him off.

Mariangeles:
How come nobody understands the principle of giving gifts and the honour that comes with it?
It is not about what you give, it is the thought that counts.
If the young man had brought something as simple as fruits and the woman complained, then she would've been wrong.

It has nothing to do with poverty. Only someone with poverty mentality would think expecting gift(s) from someone is out of place, and only someone with inferiority complex would think it is a thing of shame to except gift from a certain someone.

"A man's gift makes room for him, and brings him before great men"

Giving gifts will make way for you in the presence of Kings and great men.