lilvicky68:
I believe you know the right thing to do..

But just know that your ex won't marry you if you leave your marriage..

Absolutely he won't. Naija ladies never disappoint! it's very hard to see any that's fully loyal they always have side guy in case anything happen that's why u see when they break up with u under 2 weeks they've moved on already to next one!
Part of it, it's d situation in d country and follow follow!!!

lilvicky68:
I believe you know the right thing to do..

But just know that your ex won't marry you if you leave your marriage..

DEEP

The only thing I'll ask you to do is find out why your returnee lover is divorced...





If you won't say I'm judging you, I'd say you appeared to be rather very emotional than rational.

Zuchey91:


No, I recently told him about the cheating part.

IF YOUR EX OR Y IS HOMELY WHY IS HE DIVORCED? I BET YOU YOU'RE PRESENT HUSBAND IS BETTER THAN HIM. YOU'RE MARRIAGE IS JUST 3YRS AND YOUR EX IS ALREADY DIVORCED WERE YOU DATING HIM AS A MARRIED MAN OR HIS MARRIAGE COULDNT LAST 3YRS? IS THAT THE SIGN OF A RESPONSIBLE MAN

chatinent:


If you have evidence your husband is cheating and cannot remain in the relationship, you leave. If you are not leaving, you are still married to him! At least, I believe the only grounds for divorce is adultery.



Can two wrongs make one right?

Your reconnecting with an ex is a payback, yeah?

What if everything was a mirage and the end brings you this dropped eyeballs that your husband wasn't cheating actually? Can you unscrew the screwed? Or you wanted a reason to cling to to return to the arms of this new 2face?

Why condole cheating if that's the case?

If you cannot accept it, you leave the union. That's the only ground morally acceptable to regroup with your new 2face.



I doubt you have feelings for 2face...it's this new attention he's giving you when you so need it that's translating to emotions, pills, and feelings.

Hanty, I will not mince words.

You are afraid of your tendency to meet your ex and ...history history...yeah?

What is the assurance your ex would make a good husband? If he would, you wouldn't have left him!

You are still a married woman whether or not you accept it!

How do you manage an ex who knows you are married but wants to screw you! Doesn't it ring the bell to you he only misses your body?

Wetin dey happen for this world sef.

Abi is it only my brain that has no downtime?

well said sir.

more knowledge to your wisdom and more wisdom to your understanding.

Zuchey91:
I need matured inputs please.

I am a married woman, with a child.

My Marriage has been really rocky. Quarrels every now and then.

What basically causes the problems is our differences, we just don’t understand each other, it wasn’t so visible during dating.

Although we did not date for long....but being married, it has been from one issue to the other, right from a week after our wedding.

I have always contemplated leaving, but I am yet to be fully independent.

Sometime this year, I found out he has been cheating (I was not surprised, but I was heart-broken) my discovery strengthened my resolve to leave the union.

In the process of nursing my heartbreak, I reconnected with an ex, we got talking and he helped my heal. I did not tell him what I was going through at the time...I was just enjoying the attention he was showing me.

I should state that I did not tell my husband about his cheating, I held all the emotions back, it was a very difficult period for me because I am usually the outspoken type.

My ex is not based in the country where me and my husband reside, we just communicate on phone, he says he misses me and would want us to meet when he is in town.

I should also state that my ex was married but divorced.

I would not deny my having feelings for my ex, and I also do not want to believe in a fairytale ending, I am just confused.

Madam, I'm yet to marry, but based on my experiences with women, your ex just want to pure sand in your gari. You told him your husband cheated and he wants to leverage on that and gets what he wants from you (center of gravity). Pls don't give in to his angelic voice, "na devil dey talk 2ru him" just to ruine your marriage. If my sister comes to me with this kind issue, I'll never advice her to leave her husband since he's not beating her.

Ask yourself this question, is there anything I'm not doing right for my marriage to work?how hard have I tryed just to make sure it work? and so on. Pls,find a way of talking to your husband, so the both of you can settle this matter amicably. It may beat your imagination on the level of remous he may show and repent.

Don't listen to what some of your friends may say like, "if na me, I go show am pepper" some of them don't like your happiness in marriage and may be experiencing what's worst then your but keep bearing it. From the look of finz, you've not try to work thingz out, just try your best and leave the rest to God in prayers. Yes prayer because, God answers prayer.

Lastly, stop communicating with your ex. sounds this guy is crazy right? But that's just the truth. If not, "you no go know when you spread your legs for am" then you'll be living with this guilt except if you have a dead conscience. But if you try to make it work between man and God and to no avail, perhaps it's not meant to be.


Cheers

Zuchey91:
I need matured inputs please.

I am a married woman, with a child.

My Marriage has been really rocky. Quarrels every now and then.

What basically causes the problems is our differences, we just don’t understand each other, it wasn’t so visible during dating.

Although we did not date for long....but being married, it has been from one issue to the other, right from a week after our wedding.

I have always contemplated leaving, but I am yet to be fully independent.

Sometime this year, I found out he has been cheating (I was not surprised, but I was heart-broken) my discovery strengthened my resolve to leave the union.

In the process of nursing my heartbreak, I reconnected with an ex, we got talking and he helped my heal. I did not tell him what I was going through at the time...I was just enjoying the attention he was showing me.

I should state that I did not tell my husband about his cheating, I held all the emotions back, it was a very difficult period for me because I am usually the outspoken type.

My ex is not based in the country where me and my husband reside, we just communicate on phone, he says he misses me and would want us to meet when he is in town.

I should also state that my ex was married but divorced.

I would not deny my having feelings for my ex, and I also do not want to believe in a fairytale ending, I am just confused.

it seems like both of y'all were cheating... you guys should sit down and have that long talk and dont also forget your child... if y'all agree to mutually separate, fine

My sister, work on yourself and leave your ex out this issue. He will ruin your life. Sit your husband down and discuss with him. Bring your ego down and humble yourself before your husband.

Zuchey91:


Our upbringing is totally different, he comes from a family where women are supposed to be suffering and still be silent...this I found out after marriage...and I come from a family where women have a say.

I know how it would end if I tell him about it and I am not ready to go down that road. I am tired of the constant quarrels.
I can say I have gotten to my elastic limit and I have no strength of fighting for this union anymore in me.

I would advise to carefully analyse the situation without being too emotionally biased. And if u really believe the marriage can not work then leave solely for that reason and Pls Pls and pls cut ties with Ur ex totally cos he is bad news and really move on. Shalom

Zuchey91:


Our upbringing is totally different, he comes from a family where women are supposed to be suffering and still be silent...this I found out after marriage...and I come from a family where women have a say.

I know how it would end if I tell him about it and I am not ready to go down that road. I am tired of the constant quarrels.
I can say I have gotten to my elastic limit and I have no strength of fighting for this union anymore in me.

I can understand the exhaustion here but think about the reason why you didn't end up with the ex you want to run back to, also think about the reasons he gave for divorcing his wife before you say yes to him.

Zuchey91:


No, I recently told him about the cheating part.

This woman, You're very funny o. You didn't confront your husband about the cheating but you told your ex. Maybe you actually don't care about the cheating because that's the only reason someone that has concrete knowledge that their spouse is cheating on them will decide to keep quiet about it. Not saying anything because you're still suspecting and not sure is different but you actually know..Nawa o

Hanty, one thing you should know about guys is that they know how to arrange their wish/chopping list. Guys plan ahead, your ex is probably booking you for future chopping. It is easier for him to get an ex to chop when he visits and still be taken care of. Run far!....

As for your marriage, leave all those advices and articles that encourages women's independence, most are just deluded and nurse anger thereby wanting others to join them.
The only time i support disolving marriage is when its highly toxic. If not, please try and work on your marriage, talk to your man either verbally or with good behavior avoid quarrels and add prayers to it.
Try and be calm this period, don't think much, get books and movies.

If he is a movie person, introduce some good christian relationship movies to the house, get good books with good titles, always place them where he can see, don't forget to care for him, he is still your husband.

Then for you, work on yourself, get busy. Remove the thought of divorce, lust (especially with your ex) and stop comparing your marriage with others (i will tell you, marriage ain't rossy everywhere, some of the worst became the best, and best became the worse, focus on yours).

This is the much i can contribute.
Run away from your ex. that chases married women.

Remember hold God strong.

Zuchey91:
I need matured inputs please.

I am a married woman, with a child.

My Marriage has been really rocky. Quarrels every now and then.

What basically causes the problems is our differences, we just don’t understand each other, it wasn’t so visible during dating.

Although we did not date for long....but being married, it has been from one issue to the other, right from a week after our wedding.

I have always contemplated leaving, but I am yet to be fully independent.

Sometime this year, I found out he has been cheating (I was not surprised, but I was heart-broken) my discovery strengthened my resolve to leave the union.

In the process of nursing my heartbreak, I reconnected with an ex, we got talking and he helped my heal. I did not tell him what I was going through at the time...I was just enjoying the attention he was showing me.

I should state that I did not tell my husband about his cheating, I held all the emotions back, it was a very difficult period for me because I am usually the outspoken type.

My ex is not based in the country where me and my husband reside, we just communicate on phone, he says he misses me and would want us to meet when he is in town.

I should also state that my ex was married but divorced.

I would not deny my having feelings for my ex, and I also do not want to believe in a fairytale ending, I am just confused.

It rain everywhere, because he cheat doesn't warrant you to leave your union, call his attention and talk to him, put things right in your marriage okay, leaving him to that your so call EX, what if your EX is a great cheater ? Did you ask your EX why he divorce? I believe he's going to blame his EX, be bold enough, talk to your husband, Bleep the hell out him and put things right in your home, don't be decieve by sweet words and all those lies from your EX, two wrongs can't make a right okay, avoid any situation that will make you to blame the devil, your husband might even be reading this .

God please bless me with a wife that has sense.

Thank you for Prayer answered.

The sixth paragraph explains it all. You don't love him anymore that's if you ever did initially. The only reason you are still in that marriage is that you can't stand on your own yet and that's bad for your husband cause being in a relationship you don't want anymore leads to paternity fraud

Madam,you are just missing your ex gbola

Zuchey91:


Our upbringing is totally different, he comes from a family where women are supposed to be suffering and still be silent...this I found out after marriage...and I come from a family where women have a say.

I know how it would end if I tell him about it and I am not ready to go down that road. I am tired of the constant quarrels.
I can say I have gotten to my elastic limit and I have no strength of fighting for this union anymore in me.

I would not aya u shouldn't try to work things out with Ur hubby but listen if the incompatibility is too apparent Pls leave ó. Cos experience has taught me that if two people are not meant to be together and they persevere it down not end well for at least one of them. And again run away from ur ex ó. U hear!

Let me ask you these questions;

Why did you and your ex breakup ?

Why did you marry your husband instead of your ex ?

What did you see in him (husband) that made you say YES ?

Do you think your ex is better than your husband now?

Do you still want the relationship to work out ?

Do you think your ex will marry you now? ( even though he's divorced)

I know there's a spirit in you that might be telling you that he got divorced because you guys are meant for each another

Zuchey91:
I need matured inputs please.

I am a married woman, with a child.

My Marriage has been really rocky. Quarrels every now and then.

What basically causes the problems is our differences, we just don’t understand each other, it wasn’t so visible during dating.

Although we did not date for long....but being married, it has been from one issue to the other, right from a week after our wedding.

I have always contemplated leaving, but I am yet to be fully independent.

Sometime this year, I found out he has been cheating (I was not surprised, but I was heart-broken) my discovery strengthened my resolve to leave the union.

In the process of nursing my heartbreak, I reconnected with an ex, we got talking and he helped my heal. I did not tell him what I was going through at the time...I was just enjoying the attention he was showing me.

I should state that I did not tell my husband about his cheating, I held all the emotions back, it was a very difficult period for me because I am usually the outspoken type.

My ex is not based in the country where me and my husband reside, we just communicate on phone, he says he misses me and would want us to meet when he is in town.

I should also state that my ex was married but divorced.

I would not deny my having feelings for my ex, and I also do not want to believe in a fairytale ending, I am just confused.

Zuchey91:


Our upbringing is totally different, he comes from a family where women are supposed to be suffering and still be silent...this I found out after marriage...and I come from a family where women have a say.

I know how it would end if I tell him about it and I am not ready to go down that road. I am tired of the constant quarrels.
I can say I have gotten to my elastic limit and I have no strength of fighting for this union anymore in me.

I would not say u shouldn't try to work things out with Ur hubby but listen if the incompatibility is too apparent Pls leave ó. Cos experience has taught me that if two people are not meant to be together and they persevere it does not end well for at least one of them. And again run away from ur ex ó. U hear!

Zuchey91:


Our upbringing is totally different, he comes from a family where women are supposed to be suffering and still be silent...this I found out after marriage...and I come from a family where women have a say.

I know how it would end if I tell him about it and I am not ready to go down that road. I am tired of the constant quarrels.
I can say I have gotten to my elastic limit and I have no strength of fighting for this union anymore in me.

madam I think u have a problem with submission.u don't expect it husband to come down when things are heated up coz not all men know how to handle women like u.u need to understand dat u having a say does not equate to u making decisions.learn to follow it husband and see him give u d driving seat once he trusts ur judgement.as for ur ex,dat u are thirsty does not mean I shud drink poison.make ur marriage work.thwre is no perfect marriage out dere except of course if u never loved ur husband.

Zuchey91:
I need matured inputs please.

I am a married woman, with a child.

My Marriage has been really rocky. Quarrels every now and then.

What basically causes the problems is our differences, we just don’t understand each other, it wasn’t so visible during dating.

Although we did not date for long....but being married, it has been from one issue to the other, right from a week after our wedding.

I have always contemplated leaving, but I am yet to be fully independent.

Sometime this year, I found out he has been cheating (I was not surprised, but I was heart-broken) my discovery strengthened my resolve to leave the union.

In the process of nursing my heartbreak, I reconnected with an ex, we got talking and he helped my heal. I did not tell him what I was going through at the time...I was just enjoying the attention he was showing me.

I should state that I did not tell my husband about his cheating, I held all the emotions back, it was a very difficult period for me because I am usually the outspoken type.

My ex is not based in the country where me and my husband reside, we just communicate on phone, he says he misses me and would want us to meet when he is in town.

I should also state that my ex was married but divorced.

I would not deny my having feelings for my ex, and I also do not want to believe in a fairytale ending, I am just confused.

You be mumu …. Married woman going back to her ex .. that’s fucking gross … why would you still communicate with your ex ? Now he misses you and you do too to him .. married woman .. you caught your husband cheating yet you did not tell him or confront him .you’re evil and wicked .. a married woman . Person like you fit kill … don’t come here seeking advice .. seek advice from your conscience.. to know if what ur doing is wrong or right .. if you caught your husband cheating . Confront him and not play dumb . This is marriage madam . Go meet your ex na . Make e bleed your pussy … u would still break up … Mathews

chatinent:


If you have evidence your husband is cheating and cannot remain in the relationship, you leave. If you are not leaving, you are still married to him! At least, I believe the only grounds for divorce is adultery.



Can two wrongs make one right?

Your reconnecting with an ex is a payback, yeah?

What if everything was a mirage and the end brings you this dropped eyeballs that your husband wasn't cheating actually? Can you unscrew the screwed? Or you wanted a reason to cling to to return to the arms of this new 2face?

Why condole cheating if that's the case?

If you cannot accept it, you leave the union. That's the only ground morally acceptable to regroup with your new 2face.



I doubt you have feelings for 2face...it's this new attention he's giving you when you so need it that's translating to emotions, pills, and feelings.

Hanty, I will not mince words.

You are afraid of your tendency to meet your ex and ...history history...yeah?

What is the assurance your ex would make a good husband? If he would, you wouldn't have left him!

You are still a married woman whether or not you accept it!

How do you manage an ex who knows you are married but wants to screw you! Doesn't it ring the bell to you he only misses your body?

Wetin dey happen for this world sef.

Abi is it only my brain that has no downtime?

may almighty Allah bless you for this truth talk, how can you be comfortable with someone that want to sex married woman, let assume you marry him do you think he will not connect to his formal lover, because you are also a formal

Bola146:
madam deep inside you, you know what is right for you expect you are just deceiving yourself. Why not ask yourself the questions why your husband is cheating and fighting always? Some men need attention and real sex which many married women take for granted. Your ex you knew then might not be the man you know today. If your husband is a responsible man ( financially, caring and physically) please think twice, don't regret when lust ruin you, don't just conclude about leaving, what if your ex didn't show up? Find a way to ask him what really went wrong. But If your husband is the opposite of a good man, please still think twice before you marry your ex. I wish you best of luck!

well said! but I must add that the reason he cheated is obvious. "You have been fighting him since the first week of your marriage" and "the reason you have not left him is because you are not independent yet" (this is the mentality that makes our women leave there husband when they bring them come obodo oyibo), haba women make una fear God small nah. From your story here I assume that your husband is responsible man, you did not state that he is violent. I think his cheating is just because he can't get peace of mind at home. I am not in anyway encouraging men to cheat, but you may not agree with me that he is not violent today is just because he getting fresh air outside. If they woman outside is more loving and caring you may loose your husband soon whether you are independent or not. Please ma, kindly be a loving wife. I use God beg you, you can build a loving home with this man. Unless there are other things you need to consider (his behavior you did not state here).
Most of get into marriage to have peace of mind a build healthy home, most of when mature and hungry to have family.

We don't date for too long, we propose you jump up and God have answered your prayers. When you start seeing your ex's doing well especially they ones not yet man married, you will start disrespecting your man (this is the case most times). Put heads together build your home and finances, give your husband peace and support him, money go enter your home. Treat him like a king, he will treat you like a queen. People go dey envy your home.

Your ex may be worst, any man that is hitting on a married woman (whether ex or not) in my opinion is irresponsible.

Let's interpretate .

I'm glad my husband cheated on me, it gives me an opportunity to get back to my ex who probably has more to offer. I never loved my husband anyways. I am with him because of a leech arrangement disguised as marriage.

Let me play victim with the cheating on his part even though I'm equally a cheat.

I'll also play mental gymnastics on myself by looking outside for advice since I was never matured enough to be in marriage.

I'll listen to the advices but ultimately my decision lies with whether my ex really wants me because I can't be too sure and may lose the leech arrangement I currently have with my place holder husband.

I'm also entitled, I need to have a say because that's standard in my family( feminist shenanigans), whilst I contribute absolutely feck all to the home.

Ultimately, I'm emotionally bereft and will gladly walk right into a glaring mistake.

Na joke's oh..

Bola146:
madam deep inside you, you know what is right for you expect you are just deceiving yourself. Why not ask yourself the questions why your husband is cheating and fighting always? Some men need attention and real sex which many married women take for granted. Your ex you knew then might not be the man you know today. If your husband is a responsible man ( financially, caring and physically) please think twice, don't regret when lust ruin you, don't just conclude about leaving, what if your ex didn't show up? Find a way to ask him what really went wrong. But If your husband is the opposite of a good man, please still think twice before you marry your ex. I wish you best of luck!

Do men need a reason to cheat? Her husband cheated on her and you are telling her to find out the reason from him?

Zuchey91:
I need matured inputs please.

I am a married woman, with a child.

My Marriage has been really rocky. Quarrels every now and then.

What basically causes the problems is our differences, we just don’t understand each other, it wasn’t so visible during dating.

Although we did not date for long....but being married, it has been from one issue to the other, right from a week after our wedding.

I have always contemplated leaving, but I am yet to be fully independent.

Sometime this year, I found out he has been cheating (I was not surprised, but I was heart-broken) my discovery strengthened my resolve to leave the union.

In the process of nursing my heartbreak, I reconnected with an ex, we got talking and he helped my heal. I did not tell him what I was going through at the time...I was just enjoying the attention he was showing me.

I should state that I did not tell my husband about his cheating, I held all the emotions back, it was a very difficult period for me because I am usually the outspoken type.

My ex is not based in the country where me and my husband reside, we just communicate on phone, he says he misses me and would want us to meet when he is in town.

I should also state that my ex was married but divorced.

I would not deny my having feelings for my ex, and I also do not want to believe in a fairytale ending, I am just confused.

Try and fix things with your husband, sometimes one person in the union have to mellow down so peace can rain as long as there is no abuse, if your ex was that good and u develop feeling for him he will have endure everything to marry you.... Missing u shldnt get to ur head is just a mirage.

Zuchey91:
I need matured inputs please.

I am a married woman, with a child.

My Marriage has been really rocky. Quarrels every now and then.

What basically causes the problems is our differences, we just don’t understand each other, it wasn’t so visible during dating.


Although we did not date for long....but being married, it has been from one issue to the other, right from a week after our wedding.

I have always contemplated leaving, but I am yet to be fully independent.

Sometime this year, I found out he has been cheating (I was not surprised, but I was heart-broken) my discovery strengthened my resolve to leave the union.

In the process of nursing my heartbreak, I reconnected with an ex, we got talking and he helped my heal. I did not tell him what I was going through at the time...I was just enjoying the attention he was showing me.

I should state that I did not tell my husband about his cheating, I held all the emotions back, it was a very difficult period for me because I am usually the outspoken type.

My ex is not based in the country where me and my husband reside, we just communicate on phone, he says he misses me and would want us to meet when he is in town.

I should also state that my ex was married but divorced.

I would not deny my having feelings for my ex, and I also do not want to believe in a fairytale ending, I am just confused.

Pack well, the only reason you are still in the marriage is because you are not fully INDEPENDENT .

You are using the man, and also writing episode.
If the marriage tire you leave ooooooo. Go and continue your independence with the Ex or anyone you chose.

Zuchey91:
I need matured inputs please.

I am a married woman, with a child.

My Marriage has been really rocky. Quarrels every now and then.

What basically causes the problems is our differences, we just don’t understand each other, it wasn’t so visible during dating.

Although we did not date for long....but being married, it has been from one issue to the other, right from a week after our wedding.

I have always contemplated leaving, but I am yet to be fully independent.

Sometime this year, I found out he has been cheating (I was not surprised, but I was heart-broken) my discovery strengthened my resolve to leave the union.

In the process of nursing my heartbreak, I reconnected with an ex, we got talking and he helped my heal. I did not tell him what I was going through at the time...I was just enjoying the attention he was showing me.

I should state that I did not tell my husband about his cheating, I held all the emotions back, it was a very difficult period for me because I am usually the outspoken type.

My ex is not based in the country where me and my husband reside, we just communicate on phone, he says he misses me and would want us to meet when he is in town.

I should also state that my ex was married but divorced.

I would not deny my having feelings for my ex, and I also do not want to believe in a fairytale ending, I am just confused.

E get one babe wey I dey knack steady, how the babe feel say I like am beats my imagination..

I only tell the sweet word and show care wen prick scratch me and probably missing her body. Bum, I get the next booking appointment to knack..

U really feel ur ex likes u or missing ur body??

How women easily fall for our trick baffles me.. how on Earth is ur ex who knows ure married still be doing like say he cares ? No b knack he dey find??

if u want to leave because of something else pls do,

bazzyblings:


You be mumu …. Married woman going back to her ex .. that’s fucking gross … why would you still communicate with your ex ? Now he misses you and you do too to him .. married woman .. you caught your husband cheating yet you did not tell him or confront him .you’re evil and wicked .. a married woman . Person like you fit kill … don’t come here seeking advice .. seek advice from your conscience.. to know if what ur doing is wrong or right .. if you caught your husband cheating . Confront him and not play dumb . This is marriage madam . Go meet your ex na . Make e bleed your pussy … u would still break up … Mathews

Not surprised at your response though. So, if her husband was remorseful about cheating on her why hasn't he confessed to her yet? Why should she be the one to confront him when she already found him out?

Cheating has existed since marriage was invented.

Was created by woman Abraham+Sarah+Ishmael but has taken the lead.

Cheating has come to stay.

You're a hoe!

YoungBlackRico:
You're a hoe!