my man u just have to be sincere wth urself if u can not live with her as a wife with her past haunting u, then break it off but please be gentle with it.

@seun i agree that some ladies say such to chase men away but the thing is we don't know if that is the case here.

k0be:

ariblaze what's so unfair and infeasible about what I said? If a girl tells me about her past abortions, I'll be concerned about her ability to conceive and her health.

I totally agree. That's the major reason why I think it wise not to continue the relationship. I didn't say we won't still be friends - I just meant we'll not be romantically involved anymore with prospects for the future.

katherinae:

kemjisuper

your advice to yourself is hilarious. lolol
so u don't know that girls have fooled guys into thinking that they are virgins, and it never occured to u that virgins do other things other than sex. like MouthAction and anal sex and much much more. You know they found out that in haiti there was a huge number of girls under 15 with hiv. apparently these girls were performing anal sex with men so as not to be disvirgined, because they claimed to be christians.

Yeah I agree that not all virgins are saints, but the fact still remains that it is impossible for a virgin to have committed an abortion _{prove me wrong}. HIV is out of the question. if that were the case, I wouldn't be posting this topic.

Cheers and thanks to all posters for all the interesting comments.

fesse:

@poster, i understand where you are going to. it is all about letting go. telling you the truth, definitely she has turned from bad to good. pardon and move on with, then watch her if she will go back to her formal life, by then you can decide what to do with her or may you have nothing to do with her now.

Like I mentioned in my first post, I have pardoned her already. Besides, she must have received heavenly pardon from Our Creator before summoning the courage to confess to me.

@ kemijsuper

but can u live wit her?

@Topic
Your girl is a yamp ( Young and tramp ). Here's what to do. Take her tired @$$ to church for some deliverance and leave her there, the pastor might need a quickie ! Run for the door my friend !

please, know that we past thru so many poles in life before reaching the peak. my simple advice is, if you really love her has you have ever claim, then go ahead and 4give her and put the past behing you, non of them are as white as snow as we all think, not even in our various villages, infact no more virgin in the land. Please take this candid advice very seriously.

Wishing u all the best.

tommy.
frm: P-town.

for me ooo, for her to have goten pregnant twice it shows that shw has been screwing raw (unprotected) coupled with the fact that she was as a Lesbian (once a soja, alwaz a soja ) i advice u go for HIV Test especially if u too has made the mistake of going in raw, not for anything just to be sure even before knowing wether to go on or not

@ Post

My guy, if u ve doubt on taken any dengerious decision like dis d best thing is 2 forget it.

And if u really want to let her go dis is not d best time to discharge her u look forward to another excuse to nail her to d cross but not at dis moment dt d case is still hot (i guess).

But 1 tin is clear; u want to know? U A NOT COMPATIBLE.

Dont forget nobody will be there 2 face d consequnces for u if u end up marring her n she begins to pay for her miss deed.

Be wise pls.
good luck

Carlosein:

@ kemijsuper

but can u live wit her?

Yeah I can. But what if we can't have kids in the future? _{just saying}

tommyx:

please, know that we past through so many poles in life before reaching the peak. my simple advice is, if you really love her has you have ever claim, then go ahead and 4give her and put the past behing you, non of them are as white as snow as we all think, not even in our various villages, infact no more virgin in the land. Please take this candid advice very seriously.

Wishing u all the best.

tommy.
frm: P-town.

My major problem is not that she's slept with one or more guys in the past. It's the abortion thing that's killing me. Fine, she didn't lose her life in the process (Thank God) but there's absolutely no guarantee that her womb is still intact.

Cheers

now the thing is this ask urself why u want to get married.

pple have different reasons for doing so: love, kids, sex, companionship etc

and say you are one of those who want kids from a marriage it means you probably shuld not marry her cos she just might not be able to have any.

aik.mamah:

for me ooo, for her to have goten pregnant twice it shows that shw has been screwing raw (unprotected) coupled with the fact that she was as a Lesbian (once a soja, alwaz a soja ) i advice u go for HIV Test especially if u too has mad ethe mistake of going in raw, not for anything just to be sure even before knowing wether to go on or not

Trust me, I'm strongly against unprotected sex myself so I'm not bothered much. If I were her ex, there's no way she would have ended up pregnant, let alone been forced into abortion.

Leave am if u no fit continue, no be force.

leaving her might be the only real solution to this ur quagmire but be sure u do it for d right reason. take care cos i have to go now

Gist for the sake of threading, just 2 times na hin u wan die, my friend stop acting like a mukpas

im sure a lot of forum readers know the famous abortion clinic on adeniran ogunsanya in surulere if you have had the previlege of going throu the books you'd be surprised how may times some names appear. and besides she is 20 she no fit marry you.

I think she's ready to turn a new leaf to have confessed to you but sometimes we think we an handle some stuffs that we cannot handle in real life, do you actually think you can cope with her pasts,its one thing to forgive and its another to forget,but nevertheless try to handle this very well so that she won't think she made a mistake by confessing to you,

i feel your pain bro, same thing happened to me with my ex girl, she didnt even tell me, i heard it from some of her close friends but later she admitted to them

imagine hearing your girlfriend was sexually attacked by her uncle's friend when she was 11, had done 2 abortions, and was a lesbian, well the lesbian one didnt really bother me, it was like too much, well enough about me, back to u

i think u shhould just sit and search your heart, if you really love her, trust me you will get through it, and whenever the thought comes to your mind, just say its the past and then u didnt know her aand now she's a new person, but if you're just there for the sex , bros stick to using good condoms for the mean while, while u search for another babe,

everything depends on you, good luck!!

To be honest with you I think you don't need to break up with her. She told the secrets because she was sincere with you. If she hadn't told you, you wouldn't find out, anyway! The only account you can break up with her is if she has lost her womb, if not, so what the fuss?

for her 2 tell u her past that show,she loves you and she's ready 2 turn a new leaf.Take her to the hospital, let her go through series of test,and be confirmed that she has not damage her womb. My dear go ahead and make her yours.

@ all poster Go and see the movie sleeping dogs lie

i have read all the post and i found out that it is easy for the ladies to say he should forgive and forget, well its a good thing to do but you all have to consider the following things

1, they are not married
2, the kind of person the guy is

i really understand why the guy is feeling the way hes feeling because at this point in time _{if he has not made up his mind} alot of things will be running round his head. e.g. 2ce and not even 1ce, or what if her womb is damaged.

see my ppl for those of us that said he should forgive and move on have you thot of what will happen if later in future they have problems having kids,^{WHAT DO YOU THINK WILL HAPPEN?}.

@ poster i will say you better think of the future can you handle it till the end? if the anwser is no then do what seun said._{1st time i will agree with him}

@ TOPIC

What is the main purpose of this thread ?
are you telling us you've been banging a lesbian and now She wants to be straight?
Or you want us to tell you, is okay to be a Jerk?

@ poster
once a good girl gose bad, shes gone forever

well, think of this it seems like the only reason you are relutanct to stay with her is b/c of her might be damaged womb, well go check it out, im sure this is bothering you alot, and this can leads to future problems if u cant have children, you will be angry at her and blame her, who needs it, and besidesm u all are just not compatible, just be her bestfriend and move on

your girlfriend truly is a nutcase. ex-lesbian/ 2 abortions.
i really don't know. just keep praying i guess or make up your mind. there are some good advice on here.

My dear Kemijisuper, my advice to u is like am talking to my real brother, u see this life is full of mistries, u never Know what you will see in the next 10 years to come. Your girlfriend loves u so well that she hard the mind to confess such since to you, they'r other girls out there that has done worst be it virgin or not, they'll never confess to even their mother talkless of a mere boyfriend. Have u ever confess ur sin to her?

I think you should forgive her and give her a chance to prove her reality of turning a new leave, don't just dump her like that. GO FOR HIV TEST.
wish you good luck.

Akinagirl:

well, think of this it seems like the only reason you are relutanct to stay with her is b/c of her might be damaged womb, well go check it out, im sure this is bothering you alot, and this can leads to future problems if u can't have children, you will be angry at her and blame her, who needs it, and besidesm u all are just not compatible, just be her bestfriend and move on

Actually, I'm not near ready for marriage myself but I like to think and plan ahead for it. Therefore, I really don't see myself making a trip to the doctor with her. But if we're eventually together till that time comes, I'll definitely take your advice, thanks.

Caradona:

@ TOPIC

What is the main purpose of this thread ?
are you telling us you've been banging a lesbian and now She wants to be straight?
Or you want us to tell you, is okay to be a Jerk?

Is that in any way an advice?

busygirl:

To be honest with you I think you don't need to break up with her. She told the secrets because she was sincere with you. If she hadn't told you, you wouldn't find out, anyway! The only account you can break up with her is if she has lost her womb, if not, so what the fuss?

Of course I would find out. But it may be too late by then.

tomi_ade:

i feel your pain bro, same thing happened to me with my ex girl, she didnt even tell me, i heard it from some of her close friends but later she admitted to them

imagine hearing your girlfriend was sexually attacked by her uncle's friend when she was 11, had done 2 abortions, and was a lesbian, well the lesbian one didnt really bother me, it was like too much, well enough about me, back to u

i think u shhould just sit and search your heart, if you really love her, trust me you will get through it, and whenever the thought comes to your mind, just say its the past and then u didnt know her aand now she's a new person, but if you're just there for the sex , bros stick to using good condoms for the mean while, while u search for another babe,

everything depends on you, good luck!!

Thanks a million. Really encouraging advice from someone who's been affected before.

hhhmmmm, kinda of tough. but i suggest if your not comfortable with the lady, you leave her.

to be true with u an harlot, lesbian,gay etc. that repents is only on holiday, she is going back. be wise! she only want to secure a future husband, have legitimate children and go back to her former ways.

@poster and all,
when they brought a woman caught in adultery to Jesus, thier intention was to stone the woman to dead
but Jesus said to them whosoever that has not done such a thing since he was born should first of all cast a stone at her.
But Jesus could bring up his face, behold all the men pursuing the woman has left. And she tolf the woman go in peace and dont sin again.

IF any of you have not cheated on a relationship or has not commted any evil or crime before,
you advice will work as in for her to get off the relationship.

@poster,
I suggest you forgive her since she confessed and she will not sin again.
Let your love for her increase the more u go.

Lesbian + abortion = divorce, but if you can practice and experience party continue the relationship.

Hi,
I know u want different opinions and am sure u have them already. would u prefer if she had 2 kids holed up somewhere, what will u do then. She told u the simple truth, what else do u want. How many girls have u dated? I dont thing its an issue. and i dont thing THIS should be an issue if u love her. How would u feel if ur girlfriend posts a topic like this "HELP MY BOYFRIEND HAS DATED OVER 50 GIRLS". U said u never had unprotected sex?, Well condom no de break.

U would have a point if u were a virgin too and abstained from premarital sex in the first place.

Guy, considering the fact that she told you and promised to turn a new leaf; I would give her the chance to prove that she's changed if I were in your shoes. We all had past that were worse than hers. If you love/like her, then why crucify her just because she expressed sincerity by letting you into her dark side?
However, it might be a way to chase you off, so just buy more time to confirm both before employing an action that might turn out to be a BIG MISTAKE

Just ma 2 cents