victooman:
Good day nairalanders,during my Nysc, honestly she is everything l need in a woman,
..

Bro life is all about planning. There is no reason to shy away from facts.

Sit her down, let her know your financial capabilities. Ask her how she and her mum intends to support the marriage because or if she'll just go for registry wedding which is more cheaper and private

Since you are planning on making her your wife, tell her the truth... Her what she and her mum has to say.

Life isn't always a perfect picture at the start bro

My problem here is not whether he shd wait or not but what happens after waiting.

We men are very bad people. U could waste her time for years and end up picking another girl to marry and leave her for yeye reasons.

So my verdict is that if u love this girl like u claim, marry her now bro. U won't die. Last last, business too won't collapsed, rather she ll join u to make things work.

Thank u

victooman:
see talk abeg,, are u ready for her so l can give u her number?

It's alright. Keep convincing her to wait for you.

You will soon discover that women marry who is ready and not who they love.

victooman:
Good day nairalanders,,
l met a beautiful and excellent girl during my Nysc, honestly she is everything l need in a woman,
We finish our service last year and started life in Abuja, she live with her sister and doing her own business while l live alone in the same town,, The problem now is that this girl mother is already pressurizing her for marriage,, she is 27 yrs and the mother is already making her looks like she is too old for marriage,, yesterday she came to my house looking all moody and worried,, when l enquired she told me her mom is asking her when the man she is dating will come home for introduction,, l took my time to explain things to her,we can't go into any marriage without been financially stable,l have a business l am running and l am looking at stability of that business in 3-4yrs time,,l told her l wont give you any specific date on when to come see her people ,,but l assured her if she stick with me God knows l wont think of any other woman during marriage,,, she told me her plan is to get married at 25yrs and l told her things dont always work out the way we plan them,, honestly l dont want to lose this girl and l also dont want to rush anything,, what do l do nairalanders...

Good girls are hard to find these days. Get married to her, but both of you must decide not to have children for 3-4 years until your business stabilizes.

Kennyprince:
My problem here is not whether he shd wait or not but what happens after waiting.

We men are very bad people. U could waste her time for years and end up picking another girl to marry and leave her for yeye reasons.

So my verdict is that if u love this girl like u claim, marry her now bro. U won't die. Last last, business too won't collapsed, rather she ll join u to make things work.

Thank u

This is a great advice

victooman:
Good day nairalanders,,
l met a beautiful and excellent girl during my Nysc, honestly she is everything l need in a woman,
We finish our service last year and started life in Abuja, she live with her sister and doing her own business while l live alone in the same town,, The problem now is that this girl mother is already pressurizing her for marriage,, she is 27 yrs and the mother is already making her looks like she is too old for marriage,, yesterday she came to my house looking all moody and worried,, when l enquired she told me her mom is asking her when the man she is dating will come home for introduction,, l took my time to explain things to her,we can't go into any marriage without been financially stable,l have a business l am running and l am looking at stability of that business in 3-4yrs time,,l told her l wont give you any specific date on when to come see her people ,,but l assured her if she stick with me God knows l wont think of any other woman during marriage,,, she told me her plan is to get married at 25yrs and l told her things dont always work out the way we plan them,, honestly l dont want to lose this girl and l also dont want to rush anything,, what do l do nairalanders...

bruh If you love her, get engaged or let her go. She's a woman, her time is short.

victooman:
Good day nairalanders,,
l met a beautiful and excellent girl during my Nysc, honestly she is everything l need in a woman,
We finish our service last year and started life in Abuja, she live with her sister and doing her own business while l live alone in the same town,, The problem now is that this girl mother is already pressurizing her for marriage,, she is 27 yrs and the mother is already making her looks like she is too old for marriage,, yesterday she came to my house looking all moody and worried,, when l enquired she told me her mom is asking her when the man she is dating will come home for introduction,, l took my time to explain things to her,we can't go into any marriage without been financially stable,l have a business l am running and l am looking at stability of that business in 3-4yrs time,,l told her l wont give you any specific date on when to come see her people ,,but l assured her if she stick with me God knows l wont think of any other woman during marriage,,, she told me her plan is to get married at 25yrs and l told her things dont always work out the way we plan them,, honestly l dont want to lose this girl and l also dont want to rush anything,, what do l do nairalanders...

The problem is. We in this part of the world make marriage and getting married so difficult and expensive. If not, if two people love each other and feel they could be together and are earning something, they can get married and start life together. If they don't want kids now for any reason they plan it for later.

Louisfrank:






Guy, you've made your points clear to her, if she's truly meant for you, she'll wait and convince her mom, if you decide to get married and then start working on your financial stability it doesn't always work out, make it first oo

Oga, becareful.........person fit tell your sister or daughter to wait for him 3-4years at the age of 27, and u as a brother or father go gree? No vex me early this morning o!!!

victooman:
it is well bro,, l will rather lose her than go into a marriage without any form of financial stability,,let me ask u people what exactly is wrong with a woman marrying in her 30s?

And the question is, will you still be there for her 3-4years to come when she don clock 30 or 30+? Hope one 22-25years babe no go later enter Ur eyes? See person wey no know wetin go happen in the next second dey talk about 3-4years!!!! If you as a father hear say one boy tell your daughter this kind thing at the age of 27, Baba how u go reason am or feel in the first place?

victooman:
you are the bigger fool for thinking starting marriage with wealth automatically means it will remain like that ,, you call a person that makes 6- 7k on daily basis a poor person? are u daft? maybe you are in one mushroom job earning 50k and u dare say trash to me,, l don't have money for marriage now is another way of saying l am not settling for mediocrity,, l want something big and large for my self and family,, it doesn't mean l am as poor as an e warrior hungry Nairalander like you.

7k a day? Through betting? The girl deserves better. You are a low life. Marriage should be the last thing on your mind till you have a stable income.

My fear is that even when an income comes, you may still not have common sense. Imagine reporting your foolishness on a public space. Pathetic, spineless simp.

Your girl is looking for a way to dump you, she's just using marriage as an excuse. Who would want to marry a slowpoke anyway? Imagine this simp wants to keep a girl in poverty for years and be enjoying wifey benefits and when she has saggy breasts, you'll end up dumping her. She get sense pass you.

zed7:

7k a day? Through betting? The girl deserves better. You are a low life. Marriage should be the last thing on your mind till you have a stable income.

My fear is that even when an income comes, you may still not have common sense. Imagine reporting your foolishness on a public space. Pathetic, spineless simp.

Your girl is looking for a way to dump you, she's just using marriage as an excuse. Who would want to marry a slowpoke anyway? Imagine this simp wants to keep a girl in poverty for years and be enjoying wifey benefits and when she has saggy breasts, you'll end up dumping her. She get sense pass you.

God punish you,, if 7k a day means a man is poor,, bring ur networth let us see? people like you that have nothing are the one eager to label others poor,,, please avoid my thread,, you are right so jump to another thread,, you have spend 2 months of your life on nairaland,,how jobless one can be.

joeking2222:

Oga, becareful.........person fit tell your sister or daughter to wait for him 3-4years at the age of 27, and u as a brother or father go gree? No vex me early this morning o!!!

Guy that's why I stated that if she's meant for him, she'll wait, well before my daughter can get married or even a sister, I would personally see to her financial stability b4 even talking about the guy, its a choice guy, just that I can't advice op to rush n marry her cos he don't wantu lose her.

Why are broke girls not marrying broke guys...

Why are non virgin guys not marrying virgin girls.

victooman:
God punish you,, if 7k a day means a man is poor,, bring ur networth let us see? people like you that have nothing are the one eager to label others poor,,, please avoid my thread,, you are right so jump to another thread,, you have spend 2 months of your life on nairaland,,how jobless one can be.

The nonentity is pained. You make $11 dollar a day. I'm sorry, you're not poor, you're wretched.

I have nothing against struggling people but it becomes a problem when you're struggling and also have a loud mouth. I'll not hesitate to put you in your place.

zed7:

The nonentity is pained. You make $11 dollar a day. I'm sorry, you're not poor, you're wretched.

I have nothing against struggling people but it becomes a problem when you're struggling and also have a loud mouth. I'll not hesitate to put you in your place.

wait and you that makes a million dollar a year already spent almost 3 months of ur life on nairaland? is it seun that is paying you those money?,, jobless mofo

Extratyre01:


Give am Belle.. Na sure odd be that, she go wait

Nigerian female should be avoided by all means

victooman:
Good day nairalanders,,
l met a beautiful and excellent girl during my Nysc, honestly she is everything l need in a woman,
We finish our service last year and started life in Abuja, she live with her sister and doing her own business while l live alone in the same town,, The problem now is that this girl mother is already pressurizing her for marriage,, she is 27 yrs and the mother is already making her looks like she is too old for marriage,, yesterday she came to my house looking all moody and worried,, when l enquired she told me her mom is asking her when the man she is dating will come home for introduction,, l took my time to explain things to her,we can't go into any marriage without been financially stable,l have a business l am running and l am looking at stability of that business in 3-4yrs time,,l told her l wont give you any specific date on when to come see her people ,,but l assured her if she stick with me God knows l wont think of any other woman during marriage,,, she told me her plan is to get married at 25yrs and l told her things dont always work out the way we plan them,, honestly l dont want to lose this girl and l also dont want to rush anything,, what do l do nairalanders...

Nigerian female should be avoided by all means

victooman:
wait and you that makes a million dollar a year already spent almost 3 months of ur life on nairaland? is it seun that is paying you those money?,, jobless mofo

You keep proving how dumb you are. 60 days in 8 years or 9hrs in 10 months, what's the difference? You have far more posts on average, you are even on a faster time wasting spree. Olodo.

No wonder the girl refused to marry you. I hope you'll eventually find someone with this low IQ of yours.

victooman:
you are the bigger fool for thinking starting marriage with wealth automatically means it will remain like that ,, you call a person that makes 6- 7k on daily basis a poor person? are u daft? maybe you are in one mushroom job earning 50k and u dare say trash to me,, l don't have money for marriage now is another way of saying l am not settling for mediocrity,, l want something big and large for my self and family,, it doesn't mean l am as poor as an e warrior hungry Nairalander like you.

You are a poor and a mumu man! First, for even showing how much you end on a daily. Secondly for showing how idle you are by replying every comment.

Na so Una de deceive people daughters that you gonn marry them but they end up waiting 10yrs no marriage 90% of unmarried women are victims of this kind promise.

What that woman is doing to her daughter is what I did to my 3sisters na serious follow up I did to any guy that date them. And they are married now living happily. Some men are ready to marry but are nervous about the future just little push they fulfill their obligations.

But you are a player who is trying to look good online.
I'm a guy and I know dating na scam.

Zeekaycn:



You are a poor and a mumu man! First, for even showing how much you end on a daily. Secondly for showing how idle you are by replying every comment.

Na so Una de deceive people daughters that you gonn marry them but they end up waiting 10yrs no marriage 90% of unmarried women are victims of this kind promise.

What that woman is doing to her daughter is what I did to my 3sisters na serious follow up I did to any guy that date them. And they are married now living happily. Some men are ready to marry but are nervous about the future just little push they fulfill their obligations.

But you are a player who is trying to look good online.
I'm a guy and I know dating na scam.

God punish your generation,, l am a poor man but not as poor as your generation,, dont compare my girl with the hoes u call sisters,, idiot,,,,l am a play boy,, l played your mother or u forgotten? your sisters are married because that is the only goal and aspirations they have in life,, so go round and continue to announce it,, use the mic ,, stupid idiot,, quote me again with insult and u will regret the day u started using internet.useless fool..

victooman:
God punish your generation,, l am a poor man but not as poor as your generation,, dont compare my girl with the hoes u call sisters,, idiot,,,,l am a play boy,, l played your mother or u forgotten? your sisters are married because that is the only goal and aspirations they have in life,, so go round and continue to announce it,, use the mic ,, stupid idiot,, quote me again with insult and u will regret the day u started using internet.useless fool..

For even using God's name to lay curses the table will turn against you! If you know God you will Reverence His Name.

Why do you have such a bittered heart and it can only mean one thing you dwell in darkness. I tell you not everybody you attack like that. you don't know me. If I ever lay curse on you it sticks with you. Be WARNED. You are just starting life after you finish school don't start now to receive curses else you'll be ruined.

Oh you are claiming the gal now calling her "my Girl" go and pay her Bride price first. My gal and my wife are not the same.

victooman:
Good day nairalanders,,
l met a beautiful and excellent girl during my Nysc, honestly she is everything l need in a woman,
We finish our service last year and started life in Abuja, she live with her sister and doing her own business while l live alone in the same town,, The problem now is that this girl mother is already pressurizing her for marriage,, she is 27 yrs and the mother is already making her looks like she is too old for marriage,, yesterday she came to my house looking all moody and worried,, when l enquired she told me her mom is asking her when the man she is dating will come home for introduction,, l took my time to explain things to her,we can't go into any marriage without been financially stable,l have a business l am running and l am looking at stability of that business in 3-4yrs time,,l told her l wont give you any specific date on when to come see her people ,,but l assured her if she stick with me God knows l wont think of any other woman during marriage,,, she told me her plan is to get married at 25yrs and l told her things dont always work out the way we plan them,, honestly l dont want to lose this girl and l also dont want to rush anything,, what do l do nairalanders...

Bro your honesty in this situation is not enough.. is always good to consider both ways.. this is a lady approaching her 30s for crying out loud.

Extratyre01:


Give am Belle.. Na sure odd be that, she go wait

Wrong advised.

Premarital sex is sins and God hate fornication

victooman:
Good day nairalanders,,
l met a beautiful and excellent girl during my Nysc, honestly she is everything l need in a woman,
We finish our service last year and started life in Abuja, she live with her sister and doing her own business while l live alone in the same town,, The problem now is that this girl mother is already pressurizing her for marriage,, she is 27 yrs and the mother is already making her looks like she is too old for marriage,, yesterday she came to my house looking all moody and worried,, when l enquired she told me her mom is asking her when the man she is dating will come home for introduction,, l took my time to explain things to her,we can't go into any marriage without been financially stable,l have a business l am running and l am looking at stability of that business in 3-4yrs time,,l told her l wont give you any specific date on when to come see her people ,,but l assured her if she stick with me God knows l wont think of any other woman during marriage,,, she told me her plan is to get married at 25yrs and l told her things dont always work out the way we plan them,, honestly l dont want to lose this girl and l also dont want to rush anything,, what do l do nairalanders...

If you really love her much and she loves you too,
If you are completely convinced about her characters etc.
Go on and see her parents..
But also let her know your financial status.
I think its the best.
Good luck!!

victooman:
Good day nairalanders,,
l met a beautiful and excellent girl during my Nysc, honestly she is everything l need in a woman,
We finish our service last year and started life in Abuja, she live with her sister and doing her own business while l live alone in the same town,, The problem now is that this girl mother is already pressurizing her for marriage,, she is 27 yrs and the mother is already making her looks like she is too old for marriage,, yesterday she came to my house looking all moody and worried,, when l enquired she told me her mom is asking her when the man she is dating will come home for introduction,, l took my time to explain things to her,we can't go into any marriage without been financially stable,l have a business l am running and l am looking at stability of that business in 3-4yrs time,,l told her l wont give you any specific date on when to come see her people ,,but l assured her if she stick with me God knows l wont think of any other woman during marriage,,, she told me her plan is to get married at 25yrs and l told her things dont always work out the way we plan them,, honestly l dont want to lose this girl and l also dont want to rush anything,, what do l do nairalanders...

I AM READY...

Give me her contact, but hope she is working sha

Old news, when your business is stable in 3 - 4 years period according to you, you will realize that she's too old for you.

If you re earning 300k to 450k every month consider marriage since is business you are doing and make sure she understands what is involved. 3 to 4yrs is too much for a lady thy re pressuring at home. But the call is urz anyway

victooman:
Good day nairalanders,,
l met a beautiful and excellent girl during my Nysc, honestly she is everything l need in a woman,
We finish our service last year and started life in Abuja, she live with her sister and doing her own business while l live alone in the same town,, The problem now is that this girl mother is already pressurizing her for marriage,, she is 27 yrs and the mother is already making her looks like she is too old for marriage,, yesterday she came to my house looking all moody and worried,, when l enquired she told me her mom is asking her when the man she is dating will come home for introduction,, l took my time to explain things to her,we can't go into any marriage without been financially stable,l have a business l am running and l am looking at stability of that business in 3-4yrs time,,l told her l wont give you any specific date on when to come see her people ,,but l assured her if she stick with me God knows l wont think of any other woman during marriage,,, she told me her plan is to get married at 25yrs and l told her things dont always work out the way we plan them,, honestly l dont want to lose this girl and l also dont want to rush anything,, what do l do nairalanders...

My advice to you is tos ask her if she can wait oo and she should try to be mentally strong over her mom's pressure if she loves you and u won't betray her till the end....if she can't or u can't keep this promise....let her be

victooman:
Good day nairalanders,,
l met a beautiful and excellent girl during my Nysc, honestly she is everything l need in a woman,
We finish our service last year and started life in Abuja, she live with her sister and doing her own business while l live alone in the same town,, The problem now is that this girl mother is already pressurizing her for marriage,, she is 27 yrs and the mother is already making her looks like she is too old for marriage,, yesterday she came to my house looking all moody and worried,, when l enquired she told me her mom is asking her when the man she is dating will come home for introduction,, l took my time to explain things to her,we can't go into any marriage without been financially stable,l have a business l am running and l am looking at stability of that business in 3-4yrs time,,l told her l wont give you any specific date on when to come see her people ,,but l assured her if she stick with me God knows l wont think of any other woman during marriage,,, she told me her plan is to get married at 25yrs and l told her things dont always work out the way we plan them,, honestly l dont want to lose this girl and l also dont want to rush anything,, what do l do nairalanders...

Face the reality guy, she doesn't have all the time as you do.

How sure are you that Your business will be stable as you want it in 3 years time. What about is the business needs more time for this stability you think you need?

I would advice you ask yourself some questions .

I was in similar situations when I married. Business was a year old and could only keep us afloat as a family. So, we decided on having only two kids, cut down on all extra expenses, and it worked. Beginning of the month, I will give her the money for the family upkeep from the profit made from the previous month. She would always encourage me to keep on because the future is brighter. She was so correct because thesame business 8 years later now makes over 500k as profit monthly with a staffing capital of 2h5 persons..... Just that she isn't here anymore to enjoy them with us as she passed on along the way to Cancer.

So, ask yourself if there is a way you can combine forces and start this process? If you can't see a way, allow her go. If both of you can pull together 100k monthly as family upkeep, it will suffice in most places in Nigeria.

You can cut down also on the marriage process expenses. I did mine in the registry. Collected the list in faith, met my family, showed it to them. They gave me money that covered 90% of the list.

One thing I love about my marriage was that it makes me focus more on my business.

So ask yourself again....can I find a way to marry this woman in say one year time? If yes, join hands together and make it work. Grow your home together.

If No, then tell her to leave you alone to focus and build your business.

Free am. Dem no dey gree hear word. If you have looked at the situation and finances and can't see it making sense right now. Free am.

victooman:
bro l am not holding her o,,l only gave her a sound and reasonable advice,, leaving me is not an assurance she will get a man who will pay her bride price in 2- 3 months ,, if she leaves and the man she meets disapoint her the circle continues,, in 3- 4yrs she will be 31 or latest 32 and we will settle down and at least have something to fend for our self and the kids,, the "woman time" is a lie orchestrated by the society and nothing more. women in their 40s and fifties are given birth talk more of a girl in her 20s and 30s,,if she decides to go and gamble l will wish her well,, l am just bothered because l love this girl and she is a very good person,, so l am not holding her back..

If you like her go and see her parents make arrangements for cheapest marriage. Make agreement with her no kid for know until you are financially stable. Enjoy yourself period.