₦airaland Forum

This reminds me of a wedding i attended,the bride sobbed so loud and long after church that it almost disrupted the reception.The Rev. Fr had to come back and ask her whether she no want the marriage again so that he will announce the annulment right there.

Do not be pushed to do illegal things to satisfy your wife. If you do and you are caught,she will be the first to criticize you. Look for legal means to improve your family income and also something for her to do (hope she is not handicapped). Some ladies(me inclusive) do this a lot and if you are not careful,you will enter trouble(more reason why you should be strong willed as a man). The way you are living is not necessary because you are a catholic,it is the way your parents lived and taught you. There are Catholics committing fraud to survive and see it as nothing. I'm a Catholic too. I strongly believe in trusting God as a Christian for my finances while working hard and trying new things. The Bible said that whatever the righteous does will prosper(read Psalm 1).

I don't think coping should be much of a heartache to you since you are not an emotional person. Even for the emotional sensitive ones Time is the greatest healer. Being more aware of the people around you is natural and will be on the increase. My only advice to you will be to mend fences with ur family (I read ur posts) and learn to make friends. No man is an island. Cutting yourself off from the world especially for a perfectionist like you has greater tendency for depression and sucide.

goodfornothing:
The wife serves as the husband's complement, in other words, an assistant to her man. She is mainly subjected to dispense domestic duties but no marriage law anywhere compels her to support the husband financially, even if she earns more

There is no law that defines how marriage is being run. The couple,society and situations are what determine what happens in any home. To say a woman's assistance is complimentary where she is the sole provider or the major provider in her home is like not being true to reality. In an ideal case a woman's role is complimentary however there is no idealism any where in the world. If you want to be sincere to yourself you will agree that Nigeria is tough and most women are playing roles that they are not supposed to be playing in a normal day even in the most difficult situation.
The average life span in Nigeria is between 50-60 and most times men dies first leaving their wives with little or nothing. Most widows trained their kids single handedly unlike in the past where the family of the late husband will take over the duty. Her income is compulsory.
There are men who are sick,bedridden and cannot work,their wives income is not complimentary,it is compulsory.
There are those who have retired or were retrenched,their wives income is very compulsory.
There are many Nigerian graduates who are underemployed in Nigeria and cannot afford the basics of good food,shelter and education. Their wives income is very compulsory.

You are the same guys who goes about accusing Nigerian girls of being lazy,not being supportive and waiting for already made man but your ego will not even allow you at the same time to appreciate and acknowledge that their effort is needed.

My dear i don't believe in idealism because i live in reality. If you want to take statistics,you can start from your family(father's and mother's side) and your friends,you will get like 50 families.

Anyone who plan to start war in the streets of Anambra and Abia (the two industrial hub of the South East) is an enemy of Igbo land.

I don't know how to feel pity for any human who deprived another human being of 14months hard earned salary and made children of his staff to drop out of school in Naija just for his/her children to school abroad.

So this situation is all over. I no longer enjoy the comfort of my bed na sleeping on the floor sure pass.

goodfornothing:
Bill payment is the husband's duty. The wife can help at her own accord but it's not compulsory. But the kitchen is definitely the wife's territory!

Sorry but the truth is that what you just said is not obtainable in 70percent of homes in Nigeria with the harsh economy. A woman contribution is now very compulsory. Some women even work till 9th month of pregnancy because of hardship. That's the reality of life. And yes the kitchen is our territory,you can only be found there when we need your help.

Nigeria is developing but at very slow pace At the moment the country is stagnant. No plans for today or tomorrow. And Nigeria President does not live in Nigeria but is junketeering the world. The truth remains that I will leave this country if i get a good opportunity in a developed country. I contribute my own quota but I don't see the effect of my quota in Nigeria and I know there are many good Nigerians who are trying their best but are frustrated by the system. Thus you learn to keep quiet and mind our own business as long as you are not directly affected. US visa is a prayer point,miracle and testimony in most Nigeria churches. However for someone like the OP who desires to relocate ,I think she should be encouraged. Let them come home and invest now that Nigerian economy is in a mess. This is a good time for people who work and earn well abroad to leverage on the dollar scarcity. Maybe she and her family will have positive contribution to the society eg set up a business that will employ others. A doc from Anambra set up a world class medical facility in Adazi and we celebrated that last week. That said OP should be safety and security conscious and study the environment first before relocating. In Nigeria every state has its peculiarity.

Unforgiving spirit, sorry OP i don't know how to deal with such. Maybe you need to give your wife a lesson on forgiveness. Greeting at least is basic,she may avoid any other type of relationship. If i'm your mum,i will start greeting her sef,life is too short to keep malice and salutation is not love.

Nawa ooo So It's truly in their blood to misbehave . So ladies stop fighting the side chick,fight the cheater.

Men should know how to cook simple. Ordinarily no Nigerian wife wants her husband in the kitchen except if need be. My kitchen is special to me and I don't trust DH culinary skills but there are times I need him to do it. Well I no dey even talk sef, by the time I take my bath and lie down,he will leave TV/phone and enter kitchen.

Wait oooo their wives are the dogs. That is disrespectful.

There is no need for the meeting since pressing needs of Nigerians are not being looked at. A man whose house is burning is busy chasing rats

I know a woman like this some years ago,today her husband is dead and the table has turned. Her husband's younger brother and wife that she despised then are her bread winners today.@ Op Not your portion oooo. You will live to see your children children.

If not for anything,your wife should have been compassionate for the new born baby. I think you should seriously talk to her;maybe she had a bitter experience where her father abandoned his immediate family for the extended one(not making excuses for her ooo). She was selfish,self-centered,disrespectful(to your elder one) and uncaring. I despise selfish people. For me keeping secrets of your gifts to your family or anyone is out of it.

Coming earlier than anticipated. A self destruct strategy. Once you shoot at the military,chinook helicopters will be in Aba in 10-20 mins. And there is no bushes or hills or valleys or caves to hide. The land mass can be covered on air within a short while with unrestricted view. Military action will be devoid of sentiments unlike what we see in North East where most of their brothers are in the army. Since they have vowed to create IDP camps in Igboland,My Heavenly Father will take care of My family. May God save the innocent.

Please where is Enugu state govt in all this? These Fulani people rob,kidnap for ransom,rape and kill in Nsukka and environs. It has been intense since last year. I thought this present governor is from that area.

Good news coming from Anambra,the Light of the Nation,the land of my birth. Thank God for successful surgery. More people should follow this doctors foot steps. If you are blessed,bless your people. Show ur riches not by intimidation of ur kinsmen or carrying women.

Ok naaaa. He whose father sent to steal usually use one leg to break the door. With this stamp duty I know banks just got license to initiate outrageous charges.

Good news coming from Anambra,the Light of the Nation. Thank God for successful surgery. More people should follow this doctors foot steps. If you are blessed,bless your people. Show ur riches not by intimidation or carrying women. God Abeg pick my call,I wan set a landmark for my folks doo.

'Every drug is a poison' so say my sister who is a pharmacist. We only take drugs where the sickness is worse than the side effects of these drugs. I have worked with welders before and I see the way they chew 5-6 paracetamol or Panadol tablets at once. Some do that 2ice before the day runs out. Had to call them to order because I believe Paracetamol fit kill ooo in this case.

It baffles me why Nigerians do not obey speed limit. Is it illiteracy or just lawlessness? Any where they see good road,they will be on top speed without minding the recommended speed limit. We thank God for keeping all of them alive and wish them speedy recovery.

“The LORD will open to you His good treasure, the heavens, to give the rain to your land in its season, and to bless all the work of your hand. You shall lend to many nations, but you shall not borrow.”Deuteronomy‬ ‭28:12‬.

If you don't have a work what will God bless. Get something doing today no matter how small and God will bless it.

Creamish:
Sadly yeah.. But if the man is not a mama's boy, she will survive. I'm surprised tho.. at her age, she should dole out wisdom...not vanity..

My dear it's not about surviving. Every woman's prayer is to enjoy her marriage. Even if you have the whole world,it is tough if you are cut off from your family because you will feel like an outcast esp in the villa.

Look for another elderly woman your mum respects and take this issue to intervene. Believe me u need to convince your mum and it's possible.

A resounding YES. My family is my best and sweetest gift in the world.

My humble submission are as follows
1.She is not cheating yet
2. She is more likely to cheat if the long distance relationship continue or even during nysc
3. She may cheat after marriage if you are gone for long(she is not matured and emotionally ready) unless she changes.
4. She is still young and wants to explore
My advice;Inform her that you are going to give her the space she asked for. Reduce communication and see if she will initiate it. Socialize with others but don't date or get intimately involved with anyone. Make out time to see her face to face(after her project)and let her know your marriage timeline(eg 3-6months) to make up her mind. Once the grace is over,find ur way. Lead her to Christ,so if you ve not given your life to Christ,pls do. God is the third person in marriage. Tell her to watch Tyler Perry's Confessions of a marriage counsellor, Not easily broken.
If all these fail,I ve a young,beautiful,responsible, single 042 babe in my office with a heart of gold,contact me if only you are still the same guy after this experience and have not changed for the worse.

This news is sad. I too wonder why the low awareness and poor action from the Buhari lead government. Primary and secondary contacts of every infected person has to the isolated immediately just like was done for Ebola. If that was done, this great man wouldn't have died since he will be in the disease control center in time and treatment will be administered immediately he showed some signs. The govt is handling this with kid gloves. Let's not forget that there is something call mutation. This year lassa virus may have become a more powerful organism than the previous. Rip Doctor.

Congrats bro,do invite us for the pepper soup

Thank you for this information

The man in the iron mask- have watch this over 20times
Like stars on earth
American Ninja-(my childhood favorite)
The Gods must be crazy
Lemonade mouth
The Odyssey
Lord of the Ring
Letters to God

Great women esp that Marie Curie. Women are going places since time immemorial.