₦airaland Forum

Ishilove:
She's a writer

Quite evident. Any notable notch in her belt as a career writer

You forgot to add that you acquired your infallible ability to cook things up from their too... Bella can lie!!

She (an ex now) whizzed life out of a chicken in the moment between a blink and tossed the damn lifeless hapless into the left ajar polythene bag in my hand... Don't ask me why we had to do that ... but that was the day I started mapping out plans of escaping the tentacles of our bond when I realised I could be that chicken...

Cute or handsome, they are NICE compliments used tactically by ladies when in a mood to drain you off your hard earned doe or when they want to get you laid. Either ways, you're gonna be losin' somethin' in the end , Sperm or doe. Their choice...

The relationship between a grown ass man and the boobies go way back, it was his food tank remember? Men and Food like Five and Six? Oh Lord! When you catch him staring, don't take an offense, just kindly lure him back to reality like this magnanimous writer. It might not be intentional , maybe some conditioned reflex as it is with somebody like me . Good read, typical of a prolific writer. Who is this Peju Akande...

Perfekt match

Which work she dey do? Ashy?

Toks2008:
You know what amazes me most about some posters on nairaland?

They are not intelligent enough to address the subject but rather the poster.

Did I write about me? HE'LL NO...

Please receive common sense abeg..I'm a freelancer and a very creative one at that so don't ever make the mistake of juxtaposing my write ups with my person and in fact you deserve an e-slap.

Goodness! How would I even be addressing yo persona when I've not the slimmest idea about how bad yo life sucks in the first place? Lil earthling, Im not wowed by yo stinky mini autobiography; you're well below even my contempt and if how I've negated yo ragamuffin of a post doesn't go well with ya being, go sit yo ass down and prepare conc. soda drink .

Billyonaire:
I dont get it. Why do we consider sex as dirty; dirty act that cant be watched in public, yet we have sex everyday and night and then we turn around to tag it dirty ?

This is a global stupidity.

When u begin to procreate, I wish u get enough girls to be leaked and watched fukcing. I hope u get copies of the scene to giggle at too.

cybriz82:
lolzzz i once find a naked pic of a girl am dating n love so much like no 2moro..like play like play i walk into a barbing saloon shop y waitin for my turn i took d barber s fone just to play with it na so i begin see pics of my girl ooo snapin with her bra n showin sum nip sha.....for my heart i shout chaaaaiiiii na me b dis...i jejely barb my hair n walk homr like sumbody wey holy spirit touch.i told her everytin i saw she wx shock n ask me how did i get it? i just told her i pray mek bad person no see d pics n leak it out.na ur life i never marry u n i no get power to fight anybody....me no kuma worry cus d guy na banker n he own a jeep n barbing saloon by den me never buy bicycle.

Fantarstick story! My stomach oh...

Oh boy, I no fit date stvpid giel abeg... You fukcing is nothing buh getting it leaked? You be korexct fool!

Poverty mentality maybe... Ykno that feeling when you got a guy you can call boo having a dope ride when your whole line of ancestry can never even boast of a monocycle ? Oh boy sweet like honey ,..The future is bright! So, blame Bihari not dem beitches

This has been an entertaining thread. Feeling all bow-chicka-wow-wow.

Welcome to The 21st century. Kobo kobo century

natsuDragneel:
Speed is sweet AF...

I hanisly can't describe the feeling

natsuDragneel:
What if I told you I have a Hennessy Venom GT??

U must be super rich then cos that baby is super razz and fast. Never gotten behind the wheels of one before but I believe one of these days imma elevate and trade my Camaro for something nastier as venom.

natsuDragneel:

Okay, I'm done...
That's enough English for 1night

I'm good BTW

See Whining! Anyway nice to meetcha!!

And need I inform u, I like ur sense of humor?, You're too sweet to be true!

beamie:
Lool, mechanical engineer or mechanic? I studied computer science.

Mecho is mecho. Nice to meetcha!

Their is this injection called pavulon, Works like magic

More importantly, dig some 4feet deep pit for your garden, u go need am soon afterwards...

Next

beamie:
What would you like to study or what are you staying or what did you study in school?

Cars Cars Cars. Ironically, cars esp fast babies drive me crazy. I be mecho. U? Seamstress?

Talk2Bella:
Hehehehehehe

That kain thing... I go take am 'softly' 'softly' till I discover u

natsuDragneel:
Sensei, your English is too much na...
Dial it down abeg

E no easy keeping down below the trough of my frequency which is quite turbo charged atm , but I go try sha . How u dey bros?

Nonsense talk jarey. So because he is rich, that automatically disqualifies him from possessing some other desirable qualities right. Oh boy! Go sit yo ass down somewhere and start ruminating on how to make this money. Owo ni koko! Self pity is the last thing I wanna hear tonight, if she left u cos u ain't got the doe to go, let your pains motivate u. Dalu!

Talk2Bella:
Fight? Me who dash me power

Come and meet me in the other room to test the virility of yor claims...

beamie:
??


And I don't joke with sensitive matters like rape.
There are many ways you can joke.
I'm sure you are grown enough to understand.

I am too young. I submit myself to your superior hyperawareness oh sage!... Women's right advocate in tha building!!!

natsuDragneel:

You realize that was just plain Naija humor sha??

Bae, lighten up abeg...
Anyone that rapes is OYO

Okay, bye

The babe just dey spark anyhow like ignition coil... Zero sense of humor *spits*

Talk2Bella:


This got me

Ok, but please I take Ogun, Sango, Amadioha and Oya beg you, stop this yo catfight... so so unladylike. Kwa kwa far from it!

This is no joke but some people can be nice like that. Like nice to everybody. Until you ask her out and things come out in the affirmative, guy no go dey daydream oh

This is enthralling. As in Odikwa seerious! But wait , A lady eating that much? She be truck pusher? Ewoooo!

bukatyne:
Interesting

Why?

Like every other -isms and -schisms, this is also liable to abuse. So many ladies outchea plot, in the name of feminism, to enslave men. Unyielding to pressure and slavery stances, marriages break. Even over such miniature issues as ''You should help in the kitchen if you want yo dinner" when evidently the man has been lapped off every remaining wits by the Lagos scorching sun all day , battered so, all he ever could "listen" to is food in his belly... So many deluded , coldly heartless young maidens outchea than you can imagine hiding under the umberalla of liberal freedom and equality feminism fiercely campaigns madam.

You try. You guys with long epistles however insensible deserves all d encomiums . E no yisi!

but men were boys. Men will now lead em back to where boys lead em when they were girls too... So, why not just save yourself the stress and be a boy forever?